Wrong! "Rat" is a year in the Chinese calendar.

Onions and peppers are the food of the gods!

yeah, right, grump...the mexican "fire in your asshole" gods...(we are talking REAL onions and REAL peppers here...)


stars twinkle in the heavens...

heavens????the only thing that twinkles ,to my knowledge is my children's eyes.

i heard the milky way went sour.

Nope, that was just all the milk in my fridge.

My fridge doesn't cool enough in the Summer.

jeebus, fremen, that's 'cause you don't put enough beer in it in the first place...get with the program...it does cool enough, you just have to load it properly...


fairy dust has no magical powers whatsoever...

Sure it does....you're just sprinkling it in the wrong place, that's all! :)

I'm in my bikini right now.

no you're not...i saw you skinny-dipping a little while ago when everyone thought i was lost...


fan belts are virtually non-existent any more...

You so wawng! Many sports fans need a belt to hold their big fat guts in. Ergo, lots of fan belts. ;)

I'm wearing Minx's bikini right now.

i´d suggest the correct term would be stretching Minxś bikini, not wearing.

Raymond E Feist wrote the Riftwar and the Serpent Wat sagas.

couldn't have...i think he entered it through his keyboard...


clocks either hum or tick...

Nope. Mine constantly alarms!




Today is Monday.

actually today is sunday cuz i got two extra days off for canada day.

*well it feels like sunday*


canada day is tomorrow

Flyman how can you call yourself a Canadian when we all know it's really Dominon day tomorrow.

I'm now wearing Minx's bikini on my head.
: )

Minx's bikini is way to small to fit on your head

i can lift 330 pounds of weight a bunch of times

A bunch = undetermined amount, ergo an amount to be solved for in an equation (we'll call this L)

330 lbs = amount of weight lifted (a constant of 330)

L is not equal to weight (330) (L<> 330)


Another constant is needed to solve the equation

L +/- (X) = 330

We do not know X, therefore it can not be proven that you can lift 330 lbs 'a bunch of times'.

_________________________________________________

Bears are not reptiles.

wrong Pheatius......X marks the spot man.

skinny dippin' with the girls would be a blast.

fly, how can you say such a thing...skinny dippin' with the girls would be the NUTS!!!


there's a tree outside my window that wants to come in...

You are wrong, Unc. IT"S ALREADY IN!!!!!!!! RUN!!

Ash is the best hero with a chainsaw attatched to his arm.

BUZZER...that was john laroquette, i do believe...


sleeper jammies have little feet in them...

Not when they're your big clodhoppers, uncle phil.


It's almost Independence Day!

not in Cuba paddyjoe!




this morning I stepped on, and broke my Oaklyes.

cnor, what's in your cream-of-wheat...you didn't step on them, you SAT on them...


bones is looking for a new friend...

Hail Uncle Wrong!

Bones is having others look for a new friend.

GH serves too many masters.

you are wrong my giant lunchtime friend, GH only serves one master.....the 1/4 pounder in your shorts!


I feel strangely odd having just made a comment about Gaint Hamburgers willy.

Oh please cnor, you know you feel perfectly fine discussing another members member.


I just got home from work, so i believe it's time for a cold beer!

NO!
*slaps beer from Paddyjoe's hand*
Poisoned.
Here, drink this...
http://geokrueg.home.netcom.com/graphics/guinness.png

I just saved Paddyjoe's life.

Wrong GH, paddyjoe drank it off the floor. He is now gone.
Though, some thought him a bore, I shall miss his snore, I feel it to the core.
I went to the store and now he's no more.
We shall miss you paddyjoe, forever ever more. :(

That was the silliest thing I've written.

fremen, you little weasel...check some of your previous posts, er, better yet, check ALL of them...


the square root of four is two...

not where i come from buddy.
to squarely root four is better than a 2... its a TEN!!!



Uncle (King) Phil hates the so called, Dr Phil (his evil twin).

I happen to have it on good authority that Dr. Phil is the most watched program in uncle phil's household...


Raindrops keep falling on my head...

*shakes and puts it away*
Those aren't raindrops, mate. :D

Clowns follow me looking for handouts.

Nope, that can't be true. They're not looking for handouts, their looking for someone to sign up with them!


I feel like drinking a big mug of hot chocolate right now.

Sorry Pyrate, you must have blocked out the memory of falling into a vat on Hot Chocolate when you were young. Unfortunately, after reading this, all the pain and anguish will return and you will be unable to consume Hot Chocolate until years of counseling have been completed.

...

Spare the rod and spoil the child.

cannot spoil a spoiled child gezzzz

i like ducks. yummm

No no no my little green friend ducks like you yummm..

Its raining out...

raining? it's roughly 100 out, heat index in excess of 110, clouds all over, but the raindrops are hiding.

yellow is a bright color

It's not so bright when it's the color of the thug's shirt, whom is busy kicking you in the teeth

Witches burn because they are made of wood

LIES! witches FLOAT because they're made of wood.

She turned me into a newt!

rat, you'd better quit driving that bus because the exhaust fumes must be getting to you...HE turned you into a newt...


oatmeal sticks to your ribs...

oatmeal sticks to your skin, not your ribs




1+1=2