Since bundy likes to take things to excess (mountain climbing), it was inevitable with what happened in what the Japanese like to call "The Great Corncob Cornholing Incident of 'aught-four".

bundy, for the love of Jeebus, it's 'wipe and release'....not 'plunge and twist'! :eek:

fre knows because he used the ol' "plunge and twist" before somebody told him about the "wipe and release" thing...

:lol:
nice one fre...

**the following is a letter excerpt from Flymans soon-to-be-released tell-all memoirs, titled; Uncles, Arse Hair, Corncobs and Green: The Remarkable Life of a Chilled Roofie**

revealing to say the least.
and thats a pretty decent DOUBLE WHAMMO right there!!!

I was engaged to Bundy.

giant hamburger secretly prefers tacos

ehh19......wishes that the taco that GH is sportin' is all for himself,.....and himself only.




*bows down to bundy*

..............*(that was fucking beautiful man......nicely done mate)*..................

:lol: @ bundy! That's some letter. :D

fly likes munching tacos, but every once in a while he gets a big hankering for some bratwurst, as can be observed in the above Phallus Love Letter.

=)

Fremen has a thing for fly's ass.

back in those hazy, beer-stained, cocaine-laden '80's, Nancy had an affair with Flyman (who was still living the high life on the proceeds of his one hit wonder, the well known power ballard, Hairy and High...).

its not like Nancy was a groupie per se, she was more like an excitable enthusiast of pseudo-famous men with hairy asses, who copied the fine music of Van Halen and Alice Cooper.

Flyman was so special to Nancy, that she went (in one of those crazy, spur of the moment, drunk, rushes) and had his name tattooed in massive lettering right across her ass.

FLY on the left cheek, and MAN on the right cheek.

twenty odd years later, you'll find that Nancy wasn't ever able to get that massive tattoo removed... so she had it altered... to FREMEN...

now she tells the lucky individuals who get to see her decorative heiny that she's a freedom fighter, and that there is a small E hidden away there somewhere... but we all know its because these days shes a massive fan of Fremen, who, as we all know, is singularly responsible for bringing back the power ballard to the '00's.

did that make any sense at all?? aw, doesn't matter, this is nonsense...

I was hoping that would never be outed :|

sorry, Nancy.
how about this...

Nancy has a thing for Fremens thing for Flyman.

bundy wishes he had a "thing" big enough to play with...

unc. p played too rough with his 'thing' one morning and it fell off.
He now keeps it in a jar on his mantle.

...*you guys,(bundy),are fucked up.............i love it.

Fremen knows about phil's "little" thing cuz,.....he had a bottle of hooch,poured it in the "jar 'o penis"......let it Fre..ment for 6 nights and 7 days....slammed it back and had wild dreams of phil in velvet sleeper jammies.

the poor soul has never been the same.

flyman is the world's top expert on alien military maneuvers.

genuinegirly has a problem with letting the little things slip.........

Flyman really wants to use Nair on his ass but is afraid it will look like Nancys when all is done, because then he'll never get any work done. He will be looking in a mirror all day long.

Hard8s is likin' the looks of my ass...........

*hell dude.....go check out the female butts in exibition will ya'........you're makin' me nervous*

fly likes seeing Nancy's FINE! ass in these threads, but all he really wants to see is his own ass immortilized in a museum somewhere.

http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/attachm...tid=9170&stc=1

thats great Fremen... but...


back at uni Fremen was so moved by Mapplethorpes work that he vowed to one day create an homage to the artistic legend...
sadly, all Fremen managed to create was an internet menace called; GOATSE...

(the above photo is from Fremens, 'green snot and excess flash period' c.2004)

bundy once posed for a nude spread in Playgirl.
Luckily, it was discovered just in time by the editors that bundy wore uncle phil's 'thing' as an extender, so they 'pulled' the pics before their magazine could get a bad name.

yes, but i did get a cheque from, "HOT, HAIRY AND EXTENDED" magazine for that pictorial...

what many don't know about Fremen is that he is actually a remarkably generous man.
he has actually held the East Texas record for donations for the past seven years.

ah, but donations of what i hear you ask...

well, believe it or not, the donations question are actually Rabbit Poo... thats right... Fremen breeds, big foot-long wild coneys in his fluorescent lit basement. then shovels all the shit into little dilly bags then mails them off to old people homes.

one o' them in that avatar has to be bundy...maybe both...

uncle phil recently went out and spent $7,500 on a plasma television. Once mounted, he sat back to enjoy some brand new high-def heaven. Upon turning on the set, uncle phil saw no picture. There was sound, but absolutely no picture.

Incensed that he spent such a large amount of money on a faulty product, uncle phil called customer service and through much profane language, demanded that a technician be dispatched to his residence at once, with a new set in tow in case his needed replaced.

The technician arrived, and within minutes knew exactly what was wrong. He informed uncle phil that he had mistakenly installed the set with the screen facing the wall.

JJ loves to blame his mistakes on other people.

joe was a mistake.........always the guy who had to leave his friends in the summer time to go to that camp at the lake.....mistake......his next door neighbour stole his girl from him while he was gone.

joe rode the little bus....mistake....it crashed and joe has horrible facial scars now.

teacher.....mistake.....noone gives a rats ass about thier teachers.

*how's the snow out your neck of the woods joe.....nother mistake.....nasty weather out there*


(hehehehehehe)

clearly, Flyman was blind drunk when he wrote the above secret...
but thats certainly no secret.

his dirty little secret is that every morning flyman gets a litre of metho, pours it all over a few loafs of bread.
and when lunchtime rolls around, Fly sits back and chews on a few booze-sodden bread rolls.

mmm... yum...

Looks like somebody rode the shortbus to school. Did you enjoy your classroom down by the boiler room?

BP was the super who lived in said boiler room, and drove the short bus for extra income...

uncle phil is responsible for the upcoming apocalypse. we are all doomed.

pinoychink790 will survive the upcoming apocalypse, since he made up of equal parts: cockroaches, Slim Jims, and Pauly Shore movies.

Jonsgirl is actually the Gatekeeper of Gozer.

vorpal was the keymaster at one point....but the key was removed after a court case and a very pissed off judge. (Who knew she was his daughter)

tec really drank most of the booze...(you had to be there...)

uncle phil tried to stop him by hiding all the glasses, but...umm...you really had to be there.....

pj took the pic of phil hiding the glasses while showing his ass....you really wouldn't want to have been there...

Fremen is just jealous that he missed the entertaining alcohol induced partying.

tecoyah wears a sign when he has sex with his wife that says

"Im a moderator, fuck me NOW"

ShaniFaye gave him the sign. And watches them have sex from outside the window.

...while standing on jonsgirl's shoulders as jonsgirl says, "what are they doing now?

How about now?

And now?

What about now?


When is it my turn to look?"

Says the guy in the bushes watching them watch tecoyah, et al. ;)

And again.....Fremen becomes jealous.

and ate most of the pizza...

and wiped his mouth on the pillow case......

the pillow case that paddyjoe just used to clean up after watching tecoyah

Jonsgirl is actually Fredsgirl.........it's all a cover eh.

Flyman's favourite evening passtimes include: knitting and writing letters to lonely inmates in the Kingston Penitentary.

*edit*

Why would Charlatan want the Fast Ferry in Toronto....he's fast enough as it is.

*bastard*

hahahah.......we shall call you paddySLOW from here on out.

flyman and paddyjoe actually hate beer and enjoy getting together over tall glasses of prune juice...

Charlatan dreams of squeezing the Charmin for the flyman and joe juice party.

Sadly Joe really does dream of Charlatan performing the Charmin ritual...

Charlatan is addicted to macaroni and cheese with bacon bits in it

ShaniFaye owns a very large piece of cardboard, a Purple Fila workout suit, and copies of Breakin', Beat Street, and Breakin' 2: Electric Bugaloo. She's been practicing for months; everyone at her wedding reception is in for a surprise.

he is not Jesus and he is not jumping.

sticky really wants to be in with the "in" crowd...if he knows what i mean...

uncle phil took a pill,
drank his fill,
climbed a hill,
had a spill.
Poor uncle phil...

fremen once ordered a pizza just so he could open the door in the nude.

JumpinJesus' onetime occupation was pizza delivery, often to people in the nude.

cyrnel keeps pictures under the pillow of JumpinJesus delivering pizzas to naked people. They make cyrnel happy.

LR's pillowcase has slobber stains on it...(wouldn't happen if you were wearing a pair of sleeper jammies)

Uncle_phil secretly wants to be marilyn monroe. and he is twice a week for an hour in his bathroom. shh, no one else knows!

uncle phil is actually an aunt

and he likes to smear green jello all over is body and run through public schools

chick....hiding....in....a....mans.....body.....

flyman once auditioned to be the session drummer for Captain and Tenille. He was rejected on the grounds that the only song he knew was "Muskrat Love".

JumpinJesus was kicked out of the band, Captain and Tenille for posing for a mangina style photoshoot for the kinky truck-stop magazine, Mangina & Trucks.

i swear to god that bundy wishes he was a chick.....

*had to bring the mangina out again eh?*

flyman also wishes bundy were a chick so he could...umm...well...you know.....hehehe.

paddyjoe hangs out a crosswalks pretending to be a crossing guard

Charlatan is a cross dressing guard.

Flyman stares longingly in the mirror at his ass.

wolf holds the mirror steady for flyman...

Charlatan took the picture of Flyman's ass in the first place.

jonsgirl awaits a new pic of fly with his butt hanging out of the backdoor of...a...pair...of...SLEEPER JAMMIES!!!

uncle phils drag queen stage name is Uncle Phallus De Vine.
he performs with his gaggle of *girls* every saturday night at a drag queen bar over at Rochester.
also in his troupe are Fremen (Free's Men Onatopp), Astrocloud (Astroglider), PJ (Periwinkle Scrotum), Tecoyah (Luscious Laviniyah) and on special occasions when the crowd is gagging for something fresh and exotic, Flyman (Hairy Ass Roofie).
The show usually involves lots of mimed singing to hits such as, 'Save The Best For Last' and 'The Boys Are Back In Town'... but the big show-stopping number they do is an extremely loud redition of C+C Music Factory's massive hit, 'Good Vibrations'... where the *girls* all get out their vibrators and conga line around the small dingy club.

...which is owned by bundy.

And attended by JumpinJesus

And video taped by Astrocloud.

And sold to Bernie. :icare:

To give to bundy for his birthday. ;)

really?
you're a doll, thanks so much! (but do i have to wait another 6months to get them?)


everyone out there thinks that Carly Simon sang, "You're so vain" for Warren Beatty (or was it Mick Jagger? Cat Stevens? Kris Kristofferson?)... but those of us in the know are aware that Carly actually sang it for Bernie after Bernie kicked Carly out of the womens toilets at the local supermarket because she wanted to redo her makeup.

What even fewer people know is at that very momentous event involving carly and bernie, bundy was in the last stall on the right, trying out his new mangina.

which i had just bought at JJ's Discount Mangina and Nuclear Warhead Store

bundy is now working on a matched set of man-boobs to go with his mangina...

uncle phil just wants to sell bundy some of his excessive collection of manziers... None of them fit since he boosted his implant size.

Charlatan has every issue of "16" magazine that featured Shawn Cassidy on its cover. They're terribly dog-eared and are still hidden under his mattress, along with his red flashlight.

JJ has fond memories of said red flashlight...

uncle phil would like to have his memory back

Flyman has lost his short term memory due to excessive THC accumulation in the bloodstream blocking the creation of neural connections between synapses.

Tecoyah used to want to be a doctor, but he kept scaring patients when he kept muttering under his breath "brains.... I just need 2 more brains....

in a related deepest, darkest secret, amonkie's plans for world domination failed when tecoyah left medical school. She now spends her days splicing in subliminal messages into her mp3 tracks which she then uploads for users to download on kazaa lite.

Those messages say, "brains.... you just need 2 more brains...."

Unfortunately, she only needs one more brain since JJ happily traded his for a pair of fake vulcan ears.

Jonsgirl admits to having seen both From Justin to Kelly and Gili

Malou went with Jonsgirl to see Gigli and fell in lust with the usher in the theatre.

and who was that usher? Hmm, fremen?

JJ is still thinkin' about charlatan's red flashlight...

Late at night Uncle Phil like to sit naked in the front seat of his car and listen to talk radio... Dr. Laura turns his crank.

Charaltan is a proud sponsor (and shameless peeping tom) of the Dr. Laura crank turning.

Jonsgirl spends her afternoons giving Brazilian wax jobs to seniors at the old age home... No payment does she require... just the pleasure of close contact with the aged.

Charaltan likes to play in his kitten's litterbox, making sandcastles and using the clumps as toy soldiers.