flyman smoked his barbie collection

wdevauld keeps checking in here hoping that he'll see some sleeper jammies...

uncle phil likes drinking fiji water while listening to classical music and smoking a pipe... while in pink lacy lingerie.

JustJess shot a man in reno...just to watch him die

reiii has photographic evidence of JustJess shooting a man in reno just to watch him die. the FBI is actively looking for both reiii & JustJess.

Bernadette is sleeping with the FBI agent on the case to distract them. reiii needs to pay her more for her services.

JustJess is emptying her bank account for my pleasure.

*points at photos*
Dear JustJess, send more money immediately or the FBI agent will suddenly become very bored with me & get back on your pursuit. Not a thread. A promise.
*evil laughter*

Bernadette likes ... pie! (i like pie too)

barfly makes a hobby of collecting incriminating photos of former US presidents. Posthumously.

Martian has a secret crush on Karl Rove

Astrocloud has lost one of his fuzzy slippers. The heartbreak is that he doesn't know if it is the left one or the right one.

Kramus brings me my fuzzy slippers on a regular basis

astroglide gave away the sleeper jammies that i sent him last year...

uncle p chugs maple syrup while wearing his sleeper jammies and watching do-it-yourself shows.

^ believes Tim Curry is actually satan

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...zzzzzzzzzz.jpg

Matt Arden has had congress with the beast

reiii has bitten the beast...

Unclephil got lost one night going from his bedroom to the bathroom and endingup peeing in his wife's priceless Tiffany vase.

ngdawg watched uncle phil pee. phew!

JJ has a fixation with those fountains that depict someone or something peeing. ;)

That's quite the coincidence, because Fremen modeled for many of those fountains.

paddyjoe bathes in those fountains.

Bernadette desperately wants to be a tap dancer, but alas, she can't get taps put onto those fuzzy slippers of hers and she won't wear real shoes.. ever... :)

maleficent has tried to STEAL my fuzzy slippers on more than one occasion.
fortunately she is terrified of my dogs.

Bernadette's g-spot is Gary, Indiana.

Giant Hamburger really would prefer to share his consciousness with a fancier planet such as Saturn, but he is such a softie that he couldn't allow himself to let Earth and it's teeming billions lapse from it's current enlightened-by-a-Giant-Hamburger status.

And Kramus knows this because he is himself a telepathic alien from Tau Ceti. He lives in an attic because that is where he hides his evil alien laboratory, in which he conducts evil alien tests on poor, unsuspecting humans.

now this is funny...


meanwhile, SirLance has been negotiating with the dog of bushs baked beans fame for the secret recipe...

uncle phil spotted raspberry jam leaking from the pocket of his best sleeper jammies, at which point he fucking flipped out when he realized his wife rented out his clothes every third weekend, and twice on Yom Kippur.

Fremen pays uncle phil's wife $500 per article of clothing to rent his clothing every third weekend, and twice on Yom Kippur.

CityofAngels is filing a lawsuit-seems Fremen borrowed $1000 from him last year for renting Phil's clothes on Yom Kippur, but still has not paid him back.




is that a 3fer?

NGDawg, knowing that SirLance has the hots for her, has talked him into reimbursing CityOfAngels for the $1,000 Fremen borrowed to rent Phil's clothes, thus reducing this to a previously solved problem...

SirLance has always had a problem confusing apples with oranges...

Uncle Phil's real name is Aunt Phil.

Johnny Pyro wears mis-matched socks on purpose.

kramus routinely hides the TV remote down his pants.

Paddyjoe gets cravings for sleeping in cramped airport chairs, just to smell his suitcase.

the monk has never had a "beef-on-'weck..."

uncle mystro likes to play golf in his sleeper jammies..........


.....the ones with the feet.

fly smears jelly on his pants to attract unruly skwerlz.

fre throws eggs at the little buses...

phil 4 putts.


FORE..........

fly washes my balls...

phil keeps a photo in his wallet of fly washing his balls.

Bernadette took the picture

Johnny stole the picture from me, took it to kinkos & had it blown up as a poster for his bedroom wall.

bernie likes knowing Johnny Pyro enjoys gazing at said picture while playing the pants polka.

Fremen can't help but laugh uproriously, while inventing new phrases for touching his weiner.

G.I.Joe has the kung-fu grip.............


......on his weiner that is.

flyman has momentarily given up wearing panty hose.
currently he prefers lacy topped stretch anklets for his hot summer roofer's attire.
goes nicely with the new hot pants joe gave him.

bernadette likes to stick scaly chicken toes up her nose.

JumpinJesus secretly hopes to join a carnival to find a long-lost family member.

ohh-shesus has gotten two D.U.I.s.....on his segway

reiii enjoys rubbing orange sherbet on neighborhood dogs and singing Kumbaya.

Every night without fail, Fremen reads bedtime stories to a dead rat he keeps in his top dresser drawer.

Every night without fail, Bernadettie Spaghetti reads bedtime stories to a (sadly) dead Fremen she keeps in her top dresser drawer.

bundy doesn't wear an drawers........

Flyman knows this because he goes thru Bundy's dirty laundry...

*edit* damn to slow

mal and cj met up in a bar to discuss the best way to overthrow Rhode Island.

Fremen knitted a cute little sweater for his dead pet rat.

bernie was going to fly to rochester wearing her "personalized" sleeper jammies but the homeland security people wouldn't let her on the plane; they said she would distract the pilots too much...

sadly Phil forgot to bring his own sleeper jammies to Tecoyah's and as a result had a lot of trouble sleeping... he was forced to pass out instead.

/me runs to scan the scorecard from golf this past weekend...

I might instead prefer to talk horseshoes.................


Weeeeeeeeee.......double whammy....

Paddy Joe likes to get drunk off non-alcoholic beer.

Johnny Pyro declared his dog as a dependent on his income tax return.

SirLance had himself declared a dog so he wouldn't have to pay his taxes.




/what?

Fremen has his posts ghost-written for him.

JumpinJesus likes to run naked through Hearst Castle on the weekends.

genuinegirly loves me deeply....but is far too shy to admit it

She also loves to eat peanut butter and cheese sandwiches....at the beach...in the rain

Tecoyah has a rather large toe jam collection in his basement...

Charlatan has an unhealthy fascination with noses. He may even have a collection at home, but no one nose.

Jess likes to chew her toenails while watching re-runs of the Dukes of Hazzard... she worries that she will never stop and secretly prays that the re-runs will be pulled from the air.

Charlie's unhealthy attraction to various proboscii determined his choice of colleges. (Wossamotta U)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/09...ottaU_pic1.jpg



/nice one, JustJess ;)

Secretly Fremen was eager to attend Tuktoyuktuk University in the Yukon... but when he applied the only answer he received was a blank piece of letterhead... it read: Tuk U.

Charlatan picks his nose & saves his boogers in a fancy jar that he keeps beside his computer.
Yes folks, he snacks from that jar whilst posting on TFP.

<small>Has anyone ever said Charlatan had good taste?</small>

Charalton runs around the neighborhood in the middle of the night naked because he likes to feel the wind against his body. He is working up the courage to do his runs in the middle of the day.

amazingly BOTH bernie and shesus share the same deep dark secret to one day be able to braid their armpit hair... Bernie has even taken to studying compicated Celtic knots in the hopes that she can make an artform out of it...

/me is in awe of charlatan's grasp of celtic underarmhair knots...

Phil's secret is that it doesn't take much to render him in a state of awe...

Charlatan enjoyed a few minutes of fame some years ago when he claimed that an image of Nipsey Russell had been spotted taking shape in the pizza grease at the bottom of his pizza box. He was soon exposed as a fraud when a local news team discovered that he had painted the image there himself in the hopes of getting on television. To add insult to injury, the news team discovered his jar of boogers and he has since been known by all the neighborhood kids as "Nipsey Nose Picker".

Jumpin' Jesus swears that when he was a youngster, he ate a watermelon seed and it actually grew into a watermelon plant inside him. He claims that is why his anus is so elastic.

daoust has never caught a fish in his life...

Uncle Phil secretly yearns to be a fish...

wdevauld has this pipe dream about joining the circus to be a naked trapeze artist.

Bernadette spends hours using photoshop to remove the fur from the pictures she takes of her pets. Something tells her to not share these photoshopped creations - and that something lives inside the potted plant beside her dining room table.

kramus drinks vodka mixed with peanut butter & jelly.

Mmm-mmmm, tasty!

Fremen practices walking in high heels so he can win the next Miss Drag Queen USA

ohh shesus likes to invert the eggs in the egg cartons when she's in the dairy aisle of the grocery story. Something about how funny it is when people open eggs from the wrong end . . .

kramus spazzes out when he hears an electric can-opener...

Fremen likes burning flies with his magnifying glass.



*thanks alot Fre*

FLyman is just glad someone finally gave him a magnifying glass... now he can actually see what all the fuss is about.

charlatan stole fly's magnifying glass

Poor cj lost his best insult book....

Who told you this? :confused: It must have been my old grocery store manager...

Anyway, PaddyJoe collects wigs and tries them on everynight to find his 'best' look.

ohh_shesus shaves derogatory messages into kiwi fruit to protest the importation to America of hairy men from New Zealand. :D ;)

Oddly enough, Fremen shaves derogatory messages on to his ass to protest the the fact that there has not been enough importaion to America of hairy men from New Zealand.

and curiouser yet, mml tends to peel said kiwi fruit with little bites of the front teeth while thinking of Fremen's ass . . .

kramus draws with crayons...