Uncle Phil ages scotch in his alimentary canal.

Giant Hamburger is neither from Hamburg, nor particularly large.

Tophat has a picture of Patrick Stewart hanging over his bed.

Naked Communist is actually a fully clothed Republican.

SirLance thinks Blade Runner is pretentious and too 80s

reiii gets exceptionally turned on when viewing a Bugs Bunny cartoon wherein Bugs dresses in drag

Top serves his guests their drinks in a tall glass with ice.........and after he stirred them with his johnson.

atta boy Top.

flyman is a minister at his local Anglican Church... he just plays flyman on the Internet to "blow off some steam".

i'm not even gonna get into what Charley likes to blow off




:D

Dude, that's why they're called Highballs.

// Now return you to your regularly scheduled thread, already in progress.

top once sent jenna a birthday card...

Uncle Phil had a makeout session with Carol Channing at Club 54 in the 70's.

Of course there was blow involved.

hehe...and pop was involved in the blow...

uncle phil has a troop of monkeys dressed in sleeper jammies in his basement rumpus room, ready to deploy at a moments notice.

Fremen was attacked by said monkeys, and when preparing his defence accidentally decided on his "Banana Jammies" for battle dress.

Rehabilitation specialists say he will walk again, but the stutter will surely persist.

that "rehabilitation specialist," good ol' BigBen his own self, lies...

uncle phil sewed a banana into the front of his sleeper jammies, just to impress the gals down at the bingo hall.....

PaddyJoe knows this because he is the Caller at the bingo hall. He also knows that a banana won't do. You need a summer sausage...

SirLance owns a lot of stock in a prominent summer sausage company.

medussa watches "The Nightmare Before Christmas" at least twice a day. During one viewing, she pretends to be Jack. During the second viewing, she pretends to be the Oogie Boogie.

JumpinJesus is neither Jumping, nor Jesus!

Secret once spent hours trying to understand the intricacies of the Beavis and Butthead movie, while drinking large glasses of seaweed juice.

Dragonknight isn't really a knight! He's actually a dragon pretending to be a valiant dragon knight to lure people into his lair and eat them.

NO My secret is out!!! Zeraph is really a spy who goes around finding out peoples secrets and posting them on forms. Evil evil Zeraph.

Dragonknight's favorite movie is "Pete's Dragon" and his favorite song is Puff the Magic Dragon..... as he feels the song is his biography..... he sings it to himself every night before sleeping and cries himself to sleep

pan6467 fancies himself the next Alexander the Great, is planning to take over the world, but has to wait until he gets off work at the local mini-mart to implement his evil plan.

Medusa feeds her pet bird, chicken for dinner every night... She tells the bird that it's not one of it's brethren though, and that it's actually tuna fish.. Chicken of the Sea tuna fish..

You know that sample on Malcolm McClaren's Buffalo Gals.

The one that goes "...all this scratchin' is makin' me itch!"

That was maleficent, that was.

Jwoody thinks that in his past life he was the original dog from the TV show Lassie.

Dragonknight explores life's mysteries by searching for the elusive pair of silk sleeper jammies uncle phil has been rumored to've laced with extra Christmas verve.

Fremen masturbates to "Little House On The Prairie" episodes.

PoppinJay chooses himself for Secret Santa at work.

Doust has a vial of Paul McCartney's sweat that he stole from a teenaged fan who went to the 1968 candlestick park concert.

SirLance is a prof lancer...of pimples and blisters, etc. What he doesn't tell you though, is that he saves the fluid and bathes in it annually.

Zeraph sat through "Brokeback Mountain" three times before he got it.

pop once peed in his parents backyard...

phil video taped pop's urinary sojourn in his parents back forty, while counting the moolah in his head that he will be charging pop for the chance to peruse said tape.

"da bling be happenin'"

Phil is really 50 cent. He just goes by phil when he and elvis take the spaceship to walmart...

SirLance has not even started his Christmas shopping. You will see him on December 24th, grabbing Cabbage Patch dolls from the weak and infirm.

Poppinjay has a shrine to the poppin fresh dough boy in his house.. in fact when he moved.. he carefully hand wrapped every item and lovingly packed it ... and unpacked it when he arrived at his new destination.

he goes totally nuts, in a good way, if you poke him in the tummy and make him go heh heh heh

mal responds to "adopt-a-pet" junk mail...

Uncle phil... IS MY UNCLE, TOO!!!

"Willravel" is actually the pseudonym for the terrorist group, "Kill all knitting Granny's".

Granny's are buying guns for protection.

Elphaba is the minister of propaganda for the Knighthood of Industrious Longhorn Lipsynchers of Georgia, Romania, Antillies and Netherlands (KILLGRAN).

SirLance has really never been knighted, but he's been kinged a few times during games of checkers.

Bernadette, when she was a nubile young teenager, wanted desperately to become a nun... but then she realized that cussing at the nunnery was frowned upon and she said fuck that and went on to become the person she is today :)

Maleficent is the apathetic witch of the upper northeast. She wears non-committal slippers. She thought about getting Dorothy, and her little dog, too, but instead spent the day watching court television programs.

Poppinjay likes to touch himself when he is in the production booth and thinks no one is looking.

charlie's lookin'...

uncle p was lookin' when Eminem dropped trou.

;)

Freman was spotted at a christmas party wearing a strategically placed santa hat, and a leer, imporing all the employees of the company to come sit on his lap and say what they want for christmas...

Maleficent told him she wanted only a stocking stuffer.

pop wears stockings, unstuffed...

Uncle Phil wears nylons to keep him warm on those cold, rainy nights!

in florida? surely SirLance jests (he's a comp geek from new delhi...)

uncle phil asked santa claus for a poster of flyman in pantyhose.
santa found the poster can now only be found on ebay & the limited edition poster is just too pricey nowadays.
so instead, santa brought uncle phil a xerox copy of paddyjoe in a sexy toilet paper dress.
while uncle phil was truly hoping for the flyman poster to hang over the mantel, he was pleased with santa's substitution gift & hung it in his bathroom above the back of the toilet.

thanks, bern...i think...

bernadette was so hoping for a pic of fly in hose too.........

Flyman has memorized every word of the "M" section of Websters New World College Dictionary just because he had the free time to do it.

and daoust had to show him which page to start with...(double-whammy, fly...ain't seen that in a while, have ya...)

uncle phil likes to run, laughing maniacally, with scissors.

Medusa99 couldn't afford snakes for hair.

pop drives the beltway against traffic...during rush hour...

Phil works at the Paradise Market in what used to be the bad part of town. Then that trendy bar started attracting the yuppies and now Phil has had to add limes to his usual stock of fotties, blunts, and Kools so the damn yuppies can make gimlets and mojitos.

Damn yuppies. He kills them sometimes and stuffs them in his chiffarobe.

Pop knows it was a chiffarobe because he used to be one of the Queer Eye guys, before they kicked him off for being a fraud.

Fremen is secretly concerned that his shoes are only growing moss on one side. He stands there for days, in the same spot every time, staring down at them with this one concern filling his mind.

Kramus spent his Christmas eve camped out in line to see "Chronicles of Narnia". It wasn't until morning that he realized the theatre was closed...

Sir Lance's early years were spent playing dress-up. He liked to pretend he was a witch with a pet lion in a wardrobe.

BigBen has no wardrobe to play in, but the closet he uses to ride his broomstick in apparentley has another world he would like to explore in it's innermost recesses.

Kramus enjoys the dish of curried Spam. But he will only eat it once it has been puréed and sifted thoroughly - at least four times - to eliminate stray bone fragments.

Every morning flamingdog pours yogurt down his pants and sings "Come all Ye faithful" while watching his Richard Simmons tapes. This does not count as exercise!!

Wicked is actually a Franciscan nun, who prays that the yogurt will be pink today.

sirlance knows that the yogurt is always pink, but he just won't tell anybody...

uncle phil knows why the yogurt is pink and we don't want to know how he knows.

Avoid yogurt for a while.

PoppinJay's employer found his copy of "How to steal from your boss" workbook in his office.

Page 35 explained that smuggling pencils home was easy, if you stored them rectally.

BigBen secretly replaces pencils on his colleagues desks with those pencils he smuggled home.. and laughs maniacally when the colleague chews on said pencil..

maleficent is one of Bigben's colleague's and LOVE's to chew the pencil...

mojo dons tight leather pants just like jim morrison did.

fly feels an affinity for Morrison. They both like(d) weed....eaters!

Fremen tells ribald stories to kids at the library on Fridays. There's a C&D order in place, but he shows up anyways.

Poppinjay hasn't yet learned how to read... so he looks forward to story hour at the library on fridays, especially when Freman tells the stories...

...about Mal's role in the great "Pink Yogurt" scandal...

Sir Lance is four votes away from seceding from the United States.

BigBen was a big Prince fan in the 80's, down to wearing the purple jacket and acting all metrosexual before it was cool.

pop put extra stamps on the envelope when he ordered his latest pair of crotchless sleeper jammies...

Uncle Phill recently came out of a 14 year long prostration induced by the video "Just".

When ask if he knew what the guy said at the end he answered,
"No, I just wanted to belong".

Mantus played soccor when he was younger but had to quit because he damaged his balls.

mojo drinks milk from the family cats saucer............


fuckin' weirdo...............

Flyman is actually the son of a Southern Baptist preacher. He ran to Canada after the entire congregation said... "check your fly, man."

His mother said he was always "zipper-challenged."

Underneath her wicked exterior Elphaba loves ponies, strawberry shortcakes, fluffy bunnies, and the occasional naked romp in a lovely spring meadow.

Mojo is on the run from the FBI for being wicked.
he just changed his name,
and got into town about an hour ago.

Alpha Phi only knows two letters of the greek alphabet.

BigBen can't tell time and one of his hands is smaller than the other.

MojoRisin thinks that Father Christmas is a sexy bitch!

It's a beard thing, best not to ask.

A hot dog makes DonovanDuVal lose control, not so with his identical cousin.

Poppinjay likes to make biscuits in his shorts.

Fremen has no hair on his genitalia.
He tells women who question this state "I keep it trimmed 'cause it feels better..."

In reality, the hair folicles were destroyed in a tragic accident involving a barber's chair, Ether, 5 monkeys (3 domesticated, 2 wild), a 45 gallon drum of carpenter's glue, and a television tuned to Fox News.

I should know, I was holding the camera.

If Fremen tells you I was masturbating during the event, he is a filthy liar. I was trying to call the police with my cellphone, and he couldn't see that with all of those monkeys glued to him. And he was as high as Flyman on that Ether.

fly don't do ether man............



see........Ben sent me the tape of that incident with Fremen......at least so he thought.


what i received in the mail that day was utterly disturbing........there was Ben and "said"monkeys....on my bigscreen having the biggest freakin' banana split i'd ever seen......and..............Ben did use....as i saw with my own two eyes....the banana split as a sexual device on himself........


now you can stop wondering where that tape went Ben.........i got it.


*poor bastard*

hehe.../me knows the truth...hehe...