|
just prior to giving your woman the best tongue lashing (orgasm).she's ever experienced = a fart
|
a fart = does anyone else smell that?
|
Quote:
= "jesus phil.....that's nasty" |
"jesus phil.....that's nasty" = wanna buy a watch?
|
wanna buy a watch = buyer beware
|
Buyer Beware = Panasonic products
|
Panasonic Product = can't trust the Japs
|
can't trust the Japs = goddamn tiny people bombing the hell outta hawaii during wwii
|
goddamn tiny people bombing the hell out of hawaii in wwii = the midgets who invented mai-tais
|
the midgets who invented mai-tais = the same people who strike up a brass band in my head the morning after drinking mai-tais
|
the same people who strike up a brass band in my head the morning after drinking mai-tais=those damn scary oompa-loompas from Chocolate Factory
|
those damn scary oompa-loompas from Chocolate Factory=the orange singing people who have been stalking me for the past week
|
The orange singing people who have been stalking me for the last week = MARTIANS
|
MARTIANS = the only intellegent life in the solar system
|
the only intellegent life in the solar system = mice
|
mice = the reason that my crotch itches
|
looking for 1 = missing another
|
crabs=delicious but gross
|
Quote:
= CRABS!!!!!!!!!!! |
= itchy pubes
|
itchy pubes = a good scratch!
|
= what my gf's dog loves when he sees me
|
Quote:
= to sniff your crotch |
to sniff your crotch=impossible to do (unless you're very talented)
|
Quote:
= pleasure the one you love ....*slurp*.... |
pleasure the one you love = pleasure yourself
|
pleasure yourself=most important thing to do
|
most important thing to do= to breathe
|
to breathe = to live
|
to live = to die
|
to die = a sweet, sweet release
|
a sweet, sweet release = taking a shit after eating a lot of fiber.
|
taking a shit after eating a lot of fiber.=just the way of cleaning out your system
|
Just the way of cleaning out your system = fuel injector cleaner, engine degreaser, and an oil change.
|
Quote:
= lube,shower,blowjob :thumbsup: |
lube, shower, blowjob = girlfriend catching you cheating
|
girlfriend catching you cheating = her own damn fault for inviting her best friend to live with you
|
her own damn fault for inviting her best friend to live with you=they share a room and you're on the couch
|
they share a room and you're on the couch = home from college
|
home from college = party time
|
party time = a pizza, Ben and Jerry's, and the remote control.
|
a pizza, Ben and Jerry's, and the remote control. = we dont run so fast
|
we don't run so fast = The Smurf marathon team
|
The Smurf marathon team = all guys and one girl
|
all guys and one girl = snow white and the seven dwarves
|
snow white and the seven dwarves = children's introduction to swinging
|
children's introduction to swinging = dancing in your pajamas
|
dancing in your pajamas=things we do when you're bored & alone
|
things we do when you're bored & alone = watch
|
watch = the thing you look at and instantly forget what it said
|
the thing you look at and automatically forget what it said = television
( I was tempted to say wife...) |
television = the drug of the nation
|
the drug of the nation = alcohol
|
alcohol = what I really need right now!
|
what I really need right now! = golf weather
|
golf weather = anything but lightning
|
anything but lightning = a sharp stick in the eye
|
a sharp stick in the eye = worse than a kick in the nuts
|
worse than a kick in the nuts = big kicked in the nuts 2 times
|
being? kicked in the nuts 2 times = goodbye little swimmers
|
Quote:
|
in the kleenex,instead of the woman = appropriate place for snot rockets
|
appropriate place for snot rockets = down the front of your shirt
|
down the front of your shirt = buttons
|
buttons = Ripping them off with my teeth
|
Ripping them off with my teeth = bottlecaps
|
bottlecaps = screw-off
|
screw off = me at work
|
me at work = somebody's bitch
|
somebody's bitch = my dog Mitzi
|
my dog Mitzi = I must be someone else
|
i must be someone else = i'm not myself today
|
I'm not myself today = Freaky Friday
|
Freaky Friday = Mark Harmon
|
Mark Harmon = Summer School
|
Summer School = the suck
|
the suck = hungry baby on the nip
|
hungrybaby at the nip = little bastard took my spot
|
little bastard took my spot = christmas shopping at the mall
|
christmas shopping at the mall=aggression
|
aggression = purist form of human emotion
|
purist form of human emotion = fear
|
fear = a sign of weakness
|
a sign of weakness=anger
|
anger=a poor excuse for violence
|
a poor excuse for violence = sports
|
sports = wonderful activities
|
wonderful activities = Roshambo
|
Roshambo = a word I had to google
|
a word (ok, four) I had to Google = ELSA Gladiac 920 voltage
|
ELSA Gladiac 920 voltage = troubleshooting
|
troubleshooting=tech support
|
tech support = my friend
|
Quote:
|
maryjane = spiderman's girl
|
Quote:
|
the black widow = weaver of sinister and deadly webs
|
weaver of sinister and deadly webs = my ex
|
my ex = dumb blonde
|
dumb blonde = airhead
|
| All times are GMT -8. The time now is 11:08 PM. |
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project