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air mattress in a pool = the beginning of many a fine Hustler pictorial
|
the beginning of many a fine Hustler pictorial = Larry Flint making a joke
|
Larry Flint making a joke = not a wheelchair joke, that's for sure
|
not a wheelchair joke, that's for sure = what not to say to an amputee
|
what not to say to an amputee=hey, buddy, try walkin in my shoes!
|
hey, buddy, try walkin' in my shoes! = shaq said, tongue in cheek
|
Shaq said, tongue in cheek=I look better than Carmen in this dress!
|
Don't ya mean Denis Rodman? ;)
I look better than Carmen in this dress! = a cross-dressers dream |
oops- not awake today! lol
|
haha, easy enough mistake to make
a cross-dressers dream = painless waxing |
painless waxing = smoother women
|
smoother women = happy men
|
happy men = horny men
|
horny men=funny to watch
|
funny to watch = the marx brothers (all five of them...)
|
the marx brothers = a night at the opera
|
a night at the opera= happy tears
|
happy tears = sad similes...
|
sad smiles = bittersweet memories.
|
bittersweet memories = the one that got away
|
the one that got away = another inch longer every time the story's told
|
another inch longer every time the story's told = The Life of Ron Jeremy
|
the life of ron jeremy = a whole lot of chafed skin
|
a whole lot of chafed skin = wipe-out
|
wipe-out = 1960's surf song
|
1960s surf song = (where do i start...let's start with) the surfaris
|
the surfaris = Surfer Joe
|
Surfer Joe = look at him go
|
look at him go=Gay Bathroom Fetish
|
Gay Bathroom Fetish = soap on a rope + a convict called Swamp Dawg.
|
soap on a rope + a convict called Swamp Dawg= A scene from Oz
|
a scene form OZ = great work-experience memories.
|
great work-experience memories = my career as a stunt cock
|
my career as a stunt cock = Brittney Spears' talent rating
|
Brittney Spears' talent rating = more than Brittney Spears' IQ...
|
more than Brittney Spears' IQ= the number of Dicks she's sucked
|
the number of Dicks she's sucked = 37
|
Quote:
|
amount of wobbly pos consumed yesterday = a negative number
(i threw them up(hypotheticly)) |
a negative number = an alternate reverse polarity
|
an alternate reverse polarity = potentialy dangerous situation
|
potential(l)y dangerous situation = ooooohhh, the political possibility...
|
oooohhhhh, the political possiblity="bad" boys taking over the country
|
"bad" boys taking over the country = Biker REVOLUTION
|
biker REVOLUTION = the Tour de France + too much champagne
|
the TOUR de France + too much champagne = wobbly wheels
|
Quote:
|
too many wobbly pops = screaming diarreah
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screaming diarreah = welcome home, nirvana
|
welcome home, nirvana = courtney love + heroin + guns.
|
courtney love + heroin + guns = a huge gaping <b>hole</b> in the hearts of many nirvana fans
|
a huge gaping hole in the hearts of many nirvana fans = the death of grunge
|
the death of grunge = an abstract concept in my mind
|
an abstract concept in my mind = very interesting when it appears...
(What the hell is a wobbly pop??) |
very interesting when it appears = a hard-on in church
|
a hard-on in church = must keep hidden
|
must keep hidden = dead prostitute in the trunk of the car
|
dead prostitute in the trunk of the car = must have been some bad sex
|
Quote:
= not enough wobbly pops (wobbly pops are beers cowudders) |
not enough wobbly pops =
nothing so lonesome, morbid or drear (than to stand in the bar of a pub with no beer) (cheers slim) |
Quote:
(cheers to you slim) |
a lack of trips to the john
= extra trips to the laudramat (oh, yeah... cheers, slim) |
Quote:
(hey slim,.....cheers) |
my fucking washing machine is toast = my dryer couldn't melt butter
|
my dryer couldn't melt butter = my butter got licked by my cat
|
my butter got licked by my cat = feline cholesterol intoxication
|
feline cholerterol intoxication = cheap thrill
(oh, and cheers slim) |
cheap thrill = one cut of a janis joplin/big brother album
|
one cut of a janis joplin/big brother album = the difference between a pearl of wisdom and one of foolishness
|
cheap thrill = {getting beaten to it}
Musn't open 6 or 7 threads at once then go through replying to them... :) |
Quote:
|
Quote:
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the difference between broke and destitute = bankruptcy
|
bankruptcy = the cool thing to declare in the late '80s.
|
The cool thing to declare in the late '80s = Maiden Rulez!
|
Maiden Rulez! = what the heads said
|
what the heads said = "give us back our bodies so we can fuck again"
|
"give us back our bodies so we can fuck again" = Giant Hamburger's Headless Zombie Slaves.
|
Giant Hamburger's Headless Zombie Slaves =Zee largest army of Headless Zombie Slaves in zee Vorld!!!!
|
Zee largest army of Headless Zombie Slaves in zee Vorld!!!! = the imminent annihilation of mankind.
|
the imminent annihilation of mankind = (in japanese) "look, ma, the enola gay!"
|
(in japanese) "look, ma, the enola gay!" = A line from Pinku Froydu's immortal tune, "Sayonara Brue Sky."
(Please forgive me the cheap r/l confusion joke. I had the picture in my head of what Pink Floyd would be like if they had been Japanese, and that was the quickest way I could think to get it across.) |
A line from Pinku Froydu's immortal tune, "Sayonara Brue Sky." = Did you ever wonder why we had to run for shelter when the
promise of a brave new world unfurled beneath a clear blue sky? |
Did you ever wonder why we had to run for shelter when the
promise of a brave new world unfurled beneath a clear blue sky? = Mama do you think they'll try to break my balls? |
Mamma do you think they'll try to break my balls = the last thing he said before they packed him off to Alaskan Military school.
|
the last thing he said before they packed him off to Alaskan Military school = Huh? Mukluks?
|
Huh? Mukluks? = "I have a tiny penis" in Aleut
|
"I have a tiny penis" in Aleut = me peepee no longlong
|
me peepee no longlong = me get laughed at by women.
|
me get laughed at by women = hopping up and down while displaying a mangina.
|
hopping up and down while displaying a mangina = being able to wear your mothers thong
|
being able to wear your mother's thong = i lost weight
|
I lost weight = I ate less and excercized more.
|
I ate less and excercized more = Richard Simmons' mantra
|
Richard Simmons' mantra = "Come-on girls"
|
Come on girls = Ron Jeremy
|
Quote:
|
icon = treasured item of religious significance
|
treasured item of religious significance = the painting on the ceiling of the sistine chapel
|
the painting on the ceiling of the sistine chapel = has recently been cleaned, stirring much controversy
|
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