Actually Bernadette, The rain in spain falls about equally on the plain and on the fancy.

Spanish is a Romance Language.

no, actually it´s pretty raunchy if you know it well. me cago en dios.


there is no god. there is bush.

there is a god. he lit the bush on fire and it turned into ash

1 + 1 = 2

OpieC, that's only a special case where each 1 is in the same line. If there is any angle between them other than Pi radians, 1+1 < 2.

The universe is a big place. Possibly the biggest.

sorry Top.........the mind is a bigger place than the universe........possibly the biggest.


crabs taste sweet cooked in sugar water.

fly, we need to get you over to the "best" coast, where you'll find that crabs taste their sweetest when steamed with a little "old bay" and vinegar...


sum means "i am" in latin...

No, "sum" means "sum" in Latin.

If you release an object in a gravity-influenced environment, it will fall if it is not otherwise restrained.

What if it's a bird? Huh? HUH???? Then it would FLY!

A small piece of cheesecake on a stick dipped in chocolate is the best thing man ever invented.

averett, frank has obviously never been on the outside of a maryland crab cake...


needles have sharp, pointy ends...

According to my calipers, the "sharp, pointy end" of a needle actually measures somewhere around 8 micrometers. Thus to any organism smaller than 8 micrometers, this surface is far from pointy and in fact can make a decent dance floor.

There is strength in a union.

ha, not if you ever married mickey rooney...


ball park franks plump when you cook 'em...

No, good ol' "Ball Park" Frank is one of the skinniest people I know, and he wouldn't fit into my microwave.

If you shoot a nuke down a bug hole, you get a lot of dead bugs.

WTF? CHRIST ALMIGHTY, don't you know that the bugs mutate into even larger bugs when subjected to radiation. AAAAGHHH.
:ahem:

There is no one that can run faster than a fired bullet.

Helllooooo bullets can't run.

LeBron James was the #1 NBA Rookie Draft Pick of the 2003-2004 NBA season.

Bullets don't run.

The TFP is not a figment of my imagination.

Hey don't forget about mine! I was first! :crazy: :crazy: :p

Actually, until he actually played his 1st NBA game, I don't think he can truly be considered a "rookie" - until he was actually picked, he was still an "ex-college star"........... or some such nonsense. :) semantics, semantics............

Yuengling is the oldest brewery in America, founded in 1829.

Ahhhhhhhhh, the old "America" trick... If you said "... in the United States of America...", fair enough, but there's more to America than America. Don't forget your Canadian friends up North, who also inhabit a large slice of North America - and say hello to those Canadians in Halifax, Nova Scotia, home to Keith's Brewery, established in 1820 and still brewing.

And CityOfAngels, indeed you were! I was too slow in hitting the "Post Quick Reply" button. :D

Next: I'm an Aussie, and here we drive on the left. My undeniable statement: when visiting the US, it is a good idea to remember to drive on the right!

oz, not if you have a death wish...


rock and roll will never die...

the definition of die: pass from physical life and lose all all bodily attributes
rock and roll does not have a physical body so your sentence makes no sense.


pengiuns are birds that cannot fly in the air.

nonononono...penguins are birds that cannot fly in the WATER!


the female counterpart of patrick is patricia...

The female coutnerpart to Patrick is Petrina.

A chocolate cake can not be baked without a baker - as in one who bakes the cake.

yo, brooke, i'm not a baker and just the other day i bought one of those refrigerated thingies, popped it in the microwave, and, badda-bing...chocolate cake...


the original "anvil chorus" was played on...anvils...

The original "anvil chorus" was played on a Wednesday.


April is the cruellest month.

oh Grancy, dear Grancey, when will you ever learn...April is the "Foolest" month...


doughnuts have a hole in the middle...

No, Holes have doughnuts outside of them, jeez.

Today is Monday

You are so wrong... today is Tuesday... really!

These pants make my butt look fat.

Oh Charlatan dear you couldn't be more wrong. Those pants make your butt look FABULOUS!


Soylent green is made of PEOPLE!

frank, we've gotta talk...your misconceptions are so misconstrued...a CROWD is made of people!


water consists of two parts hydrogen and one part oxygen...

phil! Have you been smoking flyman's stash... you are wrong! water is made of melted ice!

My leg hurts where I was hit last night.

uncle phil: You are WRONG! That is a water molecule. Actual water consists of many many MANY water molecules, which would mean there is a lot more than two hydrogen atoms and 1 oxygen atom.

Bill Gates has more money than all of us combined.

CoA, you are the master of understatement...mr. gates has more money than god...

speaking of...for every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows...

Then where have all the flowers gone, Mr. Uncle Phil? If that were true, there would be more flowers now than the could be contained on earth, and we would have more flowers than we currently do. You are false due to lack of overwhelming flower content.

I will or will not be tommorow.

That's impossible Xell101. Have you forgotten again? Tomorrow is always a day away..........

The clock is ticking.....

No it's not. Mine's digital.

Apple pie has apples in it.

No, it's all sugar.

An orgasm is like a sneeze from the hips.

No... you have it backwards... a sneeze is like an orgasm for the face.

Thanks to my daughter I have seen Beauty and the Beast way too many times...

You can never see Beauty and the Beast too many times.

Sean Connery was the best James Bond.

heh...sean connery still IS the best James Bond...


Niagara falls...

Nah, you're wrong.
Last year a shipment of Viagra fell into the Niagra, and you shoulda seen it shoot upwards. Old Faithful woulda been jealous.

Dynamite in a handbag is bad.