Giant Hamburger's deepest, darkest secret (and no it isn't his sauce) - Page 13 - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

ottopilot · 09-29-2008, 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Charlatan

Giant Hamburger... now available for weddings and bar mitzvahs.

How did you find my recent colonoscopy pics?

ring · 09-30-2008, 12:42 PM

NEVER...clean or scrub your grill.
It takes years to build up that patina.
The flavor it imparts,
will keep them coming back for more.
-----Added 30/9/2008 at 04 : 43 : 55-----

Quote:

Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger

uncle phil · 10-01-2008, 02:48 AM

well...maybe a bite now and then...

kramus · 10-01-2008, 05:36 AM

Home Sweet Home - or at least a quiet retreat for the GH brood.

Taking the little ones for an outing.

Enjoying the beautiful scenery . . .

Maybe getting some grooming in at the local barber.

Giant Hamburger · 10-01-2008, 11:28 AM

Today I am a heart-shaped shadow

cast off a bit of dust in the afternoon light.

Charlatan · 10-03-2008, 03:49 AM

I sense some melancholy emoting from our sizable and meaty friend.

I know that the weight of the ages sits heavily upon your brow. I know that you long for the bloody hordes of yesteryear.

Be not sad for maximum carnage is but a slender flame away...

Fly · 10-03-2008, 05:30 AM

i've always liked the meat on the outside myself........

ring · 10-03-2008, 07:40 AM

Reflective introspection can often be mistaken for meloncholia.
I am confident our friend with MANY secrets, is just fine.

Beautiful photo GH.

Giant Hamburger · 10-03-2008, 08:47 AM

Kramus, I want to enter that rift in the space-time continuum and feel the bacon ooze between my toes and deeply breathe in the morning's porcine vapors.

Thank you Charlatan but fear not for my well being.

Ring, I fished that image out the ocean of the internet where I drag my nets often.
I can take no credit for it.

Here is one of mine own as my ragged claws continue

to scuttle across the floors of semi-silent seas.

uncle phil · 10-03-2008, 12:52 PM

speaking of porcine vapors...

ring · 10-03-2008, 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger

Kramus, I want to enter that rift in the space-time continuum and feel the bacon ooze between my toes and deeply breathe in the morning's porcine vapors.

Thank you Charlatan but fear not for my well being.

Ring, I fished that image out the ocean of the internet where I drag my nets often.
I can take no credit for it.

Here is one of mine own as my ragged claws continue

to scuttle across the floors of semi-silent seas.

I only consume the soft little fatty edges of each piece
of bacon....if you don't want yours..DIBS!

I wonder what these these teethy beasties use for floss?

jewels · 10-06-2008, 12:55 PM

... or how about on a donut, specifically a Krispy Kreme?

kramus · 10-06-2008, 06:25 PM

as for the morning's porcine vapours - well -

Quote:

Originally Posted by ring

I only consume the soft little fatty edges of each piece
of bacon....if you don't want yours..DIBS!

I wonder what these these teethy beasties use for floss?

Methinks that floss for the GH brood would resemble this.

uncle phil · 10-07-2008, 02:50 AM

these give me the porcine vapors...

Charlatan · 10-08-2008, 05:38 PM

GH! Beware of the Giant Women. They are coming for you!

The emasculation is truly complete...

ring · 10-09-2008, 06:35 AM

That looks similar to a Cozy Burger from Cozy Inn, Salina, Kansas,
'cept they don't mess around with that lettuce stuff.

I will take Giant Hamburger there for his Birthday.

http://aht.seriouseats.com/archives/...na_kansas.html

Giant Hamburger · 10-09-2008, 10:40 AM

I will look forward to your company and the onion-filled aroma that only a brace of Cozy Burgers can exude in my not-too-distant future.

Be warned, my appetites are voracious!

Tophat665 · 10-09-2008, 03:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Charlatan

GH! Beware of the Giant Women. They are coming for you!

The emasculation is truly complete...

Words fail.

She's actual size but she seems much bigger to me.

ottopilot · 10-10-2008, 05:57 AM

I highly recommend a pair of these... they have served me well.

Tophat665 · 10-10-2008, 06:06 AM

So when he's really excited, it's a burger joint AND a sausage stand.

ottopilot · 10-10-2008, 06:09 AM

ba-doom ...crash!

Ourcrazymodern? · 10-10-2008, 01:19 PM

Another drummer will help us keep the beat.

ottopilot · 10-10-2008, 04:01 PM

I recommend the Louisville Leopard Percussionists

Especially the music and video clips... HBO made a special for them in 2006.

kramus · 10-10-2008, 07:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tophat665

So when he's really excited, it's a burger joint AND a sausage stand.

GH is tented, and note that birthday! Definitely not human.

Perhaps due to his close approach?

Jetée · 11-07-2008, 08:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kramus

Enjoying the beautiful scenery . . .

Indeed. I am lusting for big one. Vacation destination, sw'd I meant.

ring · 01-28-2009, 10:46 AM

My bereftness at his lack of prescence needs asuaging.

Giant Hamburger · 01-29-2009, 09:18 AM

Hail Ring!

You have summoned me.

For you, I will fill my electronic tongue with blood and wag it.

It is nice to be missed. There is little room in this modern world for giant hamburgers.
I will fade into the shadows from time to time but when you need me just stand naked in front of a mirror and say "giant hamburger" five times.

The result will be our secret.

Fly · 01-29-2009, 11:40 AM

damn burger secrets..............

Giant Hamburger · 01-29-2009, 12:16 PM

I am more hermetical than secretive.
Once you pierce the semi-permeable membrane of my crunchy exterior,
you will find the recondite qualities of my life denuded for your pleasure.
Then you will never be seen again.

Tophat665 · 01-29-2009, 01:00 PM

The Japanese have a word for GH's secret: Umami. Fortunately, he has obliterated them in a shower of scalding burger juice, and sent his meaty minions among them to adjust the survivors to a more pliant frame of mind.

Hail, GH. It is well that you are back.

Giant Hamburger · 01-29-2009, 01:26 PM

Ahoy Brewmaster Tophat!

Your kind words warm my flesh.
I will insert your brain into my most powerful robot.
My enemies will tremble before you.

ring · 01-29-2009, 02:14 PM

The fun house mirrors that make me appear 30 pounds slimmer,
are on back order...so
for now, I am having fun posing in front of
the electric blue colored witches ball,
on my neighbors lawn.

It is five degrees below zero farenheit-with a 30 mph breeze.
99.9 percent of the small town inhabitants are very depressed republicans.

If I take my gloves and hat off,
it will probably make the front page of our 5 page gossip rag newspaper.

I will send you a copy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger

Hail Ring!

You have summoned me.

For you, I will fill my electronic tongue with blood and wag it.

It is nice to be missed. There is little room in this modern world for giant hamburgers.
I will fade into the shadows from time to time but when you need me just stand naked in front of a mirror and say "giant hamburger" five times.

The result will be our secret.

ring · 03-17-2009, 03:45 PM

So close.
Maddeningly close.

Visions of Porphyrins plague my slumber.

I fear for my hide.

Giant Hamburger · 03-18-2009, 11:52 AM

Let that hide fall about your ankles and prance beneath the sun's gloam in the freedom of vascularized skeletal nudity.

kramus · 03-31-2009, 05:37 PM

Spring is here.

GH is now gamboling in the warm ocean waters, exchanging joyful bites with his cartilaginous friends.

Fly · 04-01-2009, 06:51 AM

wow..........quite the chunk of sushi there kramus......

good luck with that GH.......although,shouldn't be a problem with your voracious appetite...

BadNick · 04-01-2009, 07:45 AM

A recent milestone in burgerdom?

Food News: West Michigan Whitecaps Giant Burger Promotion Welcome to GrubGrade

....it's a 4 pound sambo and 4800+ calories, though I understand the beef is only 1.67 lbs. What more could you ask for?

ring · 04-04-2009, 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger

Let that hide fall about your ankles and prance beneath the sun's gloam in the freedom of vascularized skeletal nudity.

I have been experiencing progress, with your last request.

Charlatan · 07-16-2009, 04:19 PM

It is the summer season and across the land burgers are sizzling on grills... happiness and contentment are felt by many. Except for the Giant Hamburger...

It feels the pain of its many offspring. And so begins the annual summer rampage!!

Giant Hamburger · 07-17-2009, 06:55 AM

I thought this thread was gone for good.

My rampages continue at their seasonal pace
but sometimes the world smells of blood
because my nose is bleeding.

10-01-2008, 02:48 AM	#483 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	well...maybe a bite now and then... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

10-01-2008, 05:36 AM	#484 (permalink)
kramus loving the curves Location: my Lady's manor	Home Sweet Home - or at least a quiet retreat for the GH brood. Taking the little ones for an outing. Enjoying the beautiful scenery . . . Maybe getting some grooming in at the local barber. __________________ And now to disengage the clutch of the forebrain ... I'm going with this - if you like artwork visit http://markfineart.ca Last edited by kramus; 10-01-2008 at 04:35 PM.. Reason: meat goes bad

10-03-2008, 03:49 AM	#486 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	I sense some melancholy emoting from our sizable and meaty friend. I know that the weight of the ages sits heavily upon your brow. I know that you long for the bloody hordes of yesteryear. Be not sad for maximum carnage is but a slender flame away... __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

10-03-2008, 05:30 AM	#487 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	i've always liked the meat on the outside myself........ __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

10-03-2008, 12:52 PM	#490 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	speaking of porcine vapors... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

10-01-2008, 11:28 AM	#485 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Today I am a heart-shaped shadow cast off a bit of dust in the afternoon light.

10-03-2008, 07:40 AM	#488 (permalink)
ring ░ Location: ❤	Reflective introspection can often be mistaken for meloncholia. I am confident our friend with MANY secrets, is just fine. Beautiful photo GH.

10-03-2008, 08:47 AM	#489 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Kramus, I want to enter that rift in the space-time continuum and feel the bacon ooze between my toes and deeply breathe in the morning's porcine vapors. Thank you Charlatan but fear not for my well being. Ring, I fished that image out the ocean of the internet where I drag my nets often. I can take no credit for it. Here is one of mine own as my ragged claws continue to scuttle across the floors of semi-silent seas.

10-06-2008, 12:55 PM	#492 (permalink)
jewels Eponymous Location: Central Central Florida	... or how about on a donut, specifically a Krispy Kreme? __________________ We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess. Mark Twain

10-07-2008, 02:50 AM	#494 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	these give me the porcine vapors... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

10-08-2008, 05:38 PM	#495 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	GH! Beware of the Giant Women. They are coming for you! The emasculation is truly complete... __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

10-09-2008, 06:35 AM	#496 (permalink)
ring ░ Location: ❤	That looks similar to a Cozy Burger from Cozy Inn, Salina, Kansas, 'cept they don't mess around with that lettuce stuff. I will take Giant Hamburger there for his Birthday. http://aht.seriouseats.com/archives/...na_kansas.html Last edited by ring; 10-09-2008 at 06:38 AM..

10-09-2008, 10:40 AM	#497 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	I will look forward to your company and the onion-filled aroma that only a brace of Cozy Burgers can exude in my not-too-distant future. Be warned, my appetites are voracious!

10-10-2008, 05:57 AM	#499 (permalink)
ottopilot let me be clear Location: Waddy Peytona	I highly recommend a pair of these... they have served me well. __________________ "It rubs the lotion on Buffy, Jodi and Mr. French's skin" - Uncle Bill from Buffalo

10-10-2008, 06:06 AM	#500 (permalink)
Tophat665 Minion of the scaléd ones Location: Northeast Jesusland	So when he's really excited, it's a burger joint AND a sausage stand. __________________ Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

10-10-2008, 01:19 PM	#502 (permalink)
Ourcrazymodern? still, wondering. Location: South Minneapolis, somewhere near the gorgeous gorge	Another drummer will help us keep the beat. __________________ BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

10-10-2008, 06:09 AM	#501 (permalink)
ottopilot let me be clear Location: Waddy Peytona	ba-doom ...crash! __________________ "It rubs the lotion on Buffy, Jodi and Mr. French's skin" - Uncle Bill from Buffalo

10-10-2008, 04:01 PM	#503 (permalink)
ottopilot let me be clear Location: Waddy Peytona	I recommend the Louisville Leopard Percussionists Especially the music and video clips... HBO made a special for them in 2006. __________________ "It rubs the lotion on Buffy, Jodi and Mr. French's skin" - Uncle Bill from Buffalo Last edited by ottopilot; 10-10-2008 at 04:16 PM..

01-28-2009, 10:46 AM	#506 (permalink)
ring ░ Location: ❤	My bereftness at his lack of prescence needs asuaging.

01-29-2009, 09:18 AM	#507 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Hail Ring! You have summoned me. For you, I will fill my electronic tongue with blood and wag it. It is nice to be missed. There is little room in this modern world for giant hamburgers. I will fade into the shadows from time to time but when you need me just stand naked in front of a mirror and say "giant hamburger" five times. The result will be our secret.

01-29-2009, 11:40 AM	#508 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	damn burger secrets.............. __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

01-29-2009, 12:16 PM	#509 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	I am more hermetical than secretive. Once you pierce the semi-permeable membrane of my crunchy exterior, you will find the recondite qualities of my life denuded for your pleasure. Then you will never be seen again.

01-29-2009, 01:00 PM	#510 (permalink)
Tophat665 Minion of the scaléd ones Location: Northeast Jesusland	The Japanese have a word for GH's secret: Umami. Fortunately, he has obliterated them in a shower of scalding burger juice, and sent his meaty minions among them to adjust the survivors to a more pliant frame of mind. Hail, GH. It is well that you are back. __________________ Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

01-29-2009, 01:26 PM	#511 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Ahoy Brewmaster Tophat! Your kind words warm my flesh. I will insert your brain into my most powerful robot. My enemies will tremble before you.

03-17-2009, 03:45 PM	#513 (permalink)
ring ░ Location: ❤	So close. Maddeningly close. Visions of Porphyrins plague my slumber. I fear for my hide. Last edited by ring; 03-17-2009 at 03:49 PM..

03-18-2009, 11:52 AM	#514 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Let that hide fall about your ankles and prance beneath the sun's gloam in the freedom of vascularized skeletal nudity.

04-01-2009, 06:51 AM	#516 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	wow..........quite the chunk of sushi there kramus...... good luck with that GH.......although,shouldn't be a problem with your voracious appetite... __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

04-01-2009, 07:45 AM	#517 (permalink)
BadNick Riding the Ocean Spray Location: S.E. PA in U Sofa	A recent milestone in burgerdom? Food News: West Michigan Whitecaps Giant Burger Promotion Welcome to GrubGrade ....it's a 4 pound sambo and 4800+ calories, though I understand the beef is only 1.67 lbs. What more could you ask for?

07-16-2009, 04:19 PM	#519 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	It is the summer season and across the land burgers are sizzling on grills... happiness and contentment are felt by many. Except for the Giant Hamburger... It feels the pain of its many offspring. And so begins the annual summer rampage!! __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

07-17-2009, 06:55 AM	#520 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	I thought this thread was gone for good. My rampages continue at their seasonal pace but sometimes the world smells of blood because my nose is bleeding.