Giant Hamburger's deepest, darkest secret (and no it isn't his sauce) - Page 5 - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Charlatan · 07-25-2005, 12:56 PM

Attention TFP!

It should be noted that while we were in Rochester this weekend and visiting the George Eastman House we visited the Edward Weston exhibit. At one point ShaniFaye let out with a gasp, "Oh my God, It's Giant Hamburger"...

Sure enough, our giant meaty friend had left his mark in anticipation of our attendance... Seeing as this picture was taken many years ago, and he doesn't look any older today, I present this as further proof of his immortality...

The fact that Christ has left his imprint in the stone above only adds to the mystery (could it be that his leaking ketchup is just a manifestation of stigmata?)

The mind boggles.

Johnny Pyro · 07-25-2005, 02:05 PM

This thread is making me hungry! McDonalds here I come!

Astrocloud · 07-26-2005, 01:42 PM

Yes, the burger too is hungry.

Astrocloud · 08-13-2005, 09:56 AM

Tophat665 · 08-13-2005, 10:40 AM

Reading back through these, I have a "Burger Wapper of Turin" crinkling softly in the back of my noggin.

"Yea, though they ground him, pressed him, seared him upon a grill of hot iron. Though they tortured him with molten cheese, humiliated him with condiments, pelted him with fresh and tasty vegetable, and locked him between two bready buns. Though they wrapped him in an environmetally friendly shroud of recycled paper and imprisoned him on a shelf under hot red lights, cheek by jowl with lowly potatoes, verily he rose again to defeat your hunger!"

Giant Hamburger Fried for your sins!

Nancy · 08-20-2005, 01:57 AM

For those with a giant appetite..

Fly · 08-20-2005, 06:23 AM

hey GH............i think i love you man.

you wanna dance?

Astrocloud · 08-24-2005, 12:23 PM

Astrocloud · 08-31-2005, 01:53 PM

Astrocloud · 08-31-2005, 01:58 PM

Giant Hamburger · 08-31-2005, 08:00 PM

*puts thread in space probe and sets course for the center of the sun

Charlatan · 09-01-2005, 04:53 AM

...ain't no stoppin' us now!

Astrocloud · 09-01-2005, 05:08 AM

To the center of the SUN!

Charlatan · 09-08-2005, 01:06 PM

The carnage continues...

Ishmal · 10-07-2005, 05:37 PM

Ishmal · 10-07-2005, 06:10 PM

and one about GH's little brother...

Astrocloud · 10-08-2005, 07:15 AM

Stop helping the Hamburger.

Giant Hamburger · 11-04-2005, 10:13 AM

Redlemon · 11-04-2005, 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nancy

For those with a giant appetite..

GH, don't fall for her tricks! That's not a burger, it's a cake disguised as a burger! Imposter, get it out of here!!

Charlatan · 11-25-2005, 12:59 PM

Behold! The makings of an unholy feast.

While most are pleased to take part, others hold up a hand of caution.

Size matters!!!.

The master demands only the hottest of fires from the best of wood.

The high preists intone the incantations...

Insidious granishes are prepared for it unholy raiment...

Sound the klaxons! Slay the virgins! Woe to thee who does not bow before greatness!

And his body was dressed in only the finest of garnishes and cheeses...

In honour of our dark lord do we here slay his only begotten son!

UNHOLY COMMUNION DIDST COMMENCE!

Giant Hamburger · 11-25-2005, 01:23 PM

That was quite beautiful.
*wipes tear

Until now, I had never seen a hamburger so large in captivity.

Charlatan · 11-29-2005, 09:36 AM

Ishmal · 12-15-2005, 09:10 PM

Giant Hamburger · 01-11-2006, 01:46 PM

Hail Citizens!

I actually do have a secret.

If the stars align just right, there will be a new tiny hamburger in my life.
The mothership is scheduled to land in July.
I expect to be eaten by my teaming brood ere this year is through.

Remember me fondly,
-GH

Charlatan · 01-11-2006, 01:52 PM

This is frightening news.

The power of Burger Giganticus continues to grown and spread.

Heed my warning for soon there will not be enough condiments to go around.

maleficent · 01-11-2006, 01:53 PM

ooooh that's so exciting--- is this a new little meatball?

Congratulations oh exaulted hamburger...

Giant Hamburger · 01-11-2006, 02:49 PM

Fear the frothing black sperm of my loins!

I will cover your puny planet with my fecund seed before you can mobilize any effective resistance.
Your fertile women and their soon to be distended abdomens will burst forth a veritable army of my minions.

Just reading this post has a 38% chance of impregnating you.

Fremen · 01-11-2006, 03:03 PM

Congrats on your new forthcoming wee burger, GH. I hope you and the Mrs. have a safe and healthy time of it.

Now, if only my giant burger gestation period was through.

maleficent · 01-11-2006, 03:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger

Fear the frothing black sperm of my loins!
.

That's a visual I could have done without... Please dear god -- of all that is holy - do not post that in Tilted Exhibition...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger

Just reading this post has a 38% chance of impregnating you.

I'm scared now...

rlynnm · 01-11-2006, 04:02 PM

No wonder I felt queasy this morning.

You shall be hearing from my lawyer oh Great sandwhich of sandwhiches.

Charlatan · 01-11-2006, 05:00 PM

All of the lawyers work for Giant Hamburger... haven't you been following this thread? He is everywhere and you are next.

Fly · 01-11-2006, 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger

Just reading this post has a 38% chance of impregnating you.

i knew it......i fuckin' knew it.

it wasn't the 26er of rum i drank the other night after all.

congrats GH.

rlynnm · 01-11-2006, 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Charlatan

All of the lawyers work for Giant Hamburger... haven't you been following this thread? He is everywhere and you are next.

runs, hides and quivers under cardboard box.

Charlatan · 01-12-2006, 06:43 AM

It's too late... the Burger Baby cometh!

http://hongkong.neuerordner.de/archi...y_sandwich.jpg

Giant Hamburger · 01-12-2006, 07:38 AM

Hail to all my future Baby Mommas!

Please send your entire catalog of illegitimate hamburgearian offspring to the North Pole for processing and reclamation.
You will be compensated for time spent in gestation.
I prefer medium rare.
Over and out.
-GH

Charlatan · 01-18-2006, 10:35 AM

Troublebot · 01-20-2006, 12:04 PM

Hail GH!

I arise from my slumber to find your glorious news! Congrats on the... mini-burger? Slider?

Know that a feast will be held in your honour at the 'Bot's humble abode.

Do not try and stop the Giant Hamburger my friends, do not even try and contain him.

Nancy · 01-25-2006, 11:58 PM

A birthday gift for the forthcoming Burger Jr. ..

- A Burger Climb!!

Giant Hamburger · 01-26-2006, 12:49 PM

Do not draw the attention of my spermatozoa!

It is always in search mode.

You have been warned.
"Love,"
-GH

Fly · 01-26-2006, 12:52 PM

i might have told you this before GH.......but........i think i wanna eat you man.

07-25-2005, 12:56 PM	#161 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	Attention TFP! It should be noted that while we were in Rochester this weekend and visiting the George Eastman House we visited the Edward Weston exhibit. At one point ShaniFaye let out with a gasp, "Oh my God, It's Giant Hamburger"... Sure enough, our giant meaty friend had left his mark in anticipation of our attendance... Seeing as this picture was taken many years ago, and he doesn't look any older today, I present this as further proof of his immortality... The fact that Christ has left his imprint in the stone above only adds to the mystery (could it be that his leaking ketchup is just a manifestation of stigmata?) The mind boggles. __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke Last edited by Charlatan; 07-26-2005 at 01:44 PM..

07-25-2005, 02:05 PM	#162 (permalink)
Johnny Pyro Hey Now! Location: Massachusetts (Redneck, white boy town. I hate it here.)	This thread is making me hungry! McDonalds here I come! __________________ "From delusion lead me to truth, from darkness lead me to light, from death lead me to eternal life. - Sheriff John Wydell

08-13-2005, 10:40 AM	#165 (permalink)
Tophat665 Minion of the scaléd ones Location: Northeast Jesusland	Reading back through these, I have a "Burger Wapper of Turin" crinkling softly in the back of my noggin. "Yea, though they ground him, pressed him, seared him upon a grill of hot iron. Though they tortured him with molten cheese, humiliated him with condiments, pelted him with fresh and tasty vegetable, and locked him between two bready buns. Though they wrapped him in an environmetally friendly shroud of recycled paper and imprisoned him on a shelf under hot red lights, cheek by jowl with lowly potatoes, verily he rose again to defeat your hunger!" Giant Hamburger Fried for your sins! __________________ Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

08-20-2005, 01:57 AM	#166 (permalink)
Nancy Femme Fatale Location: Elysium	For those with a giant appetite.. __________________ I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.

08-20-2005, 06:23 AM	#167 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	hey GH............i think i love you man. you wanna dance? __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

07-26-2005, 01:42 PM	#163 (permalink)
Astrocloud Apocalypse Nerd	Yes, the burger too is hungry.

08-13-2005, 09:56 AM	#164 (permalink)
Astrocloud Apocalypse Nerd

08-24-2005, 12:23 PM	#168 (permalink)
Astrocloud Apocalypse Nerd

08-31-2005, 01:53 PM	#169 (permalink)
Astrocloud Apocalypse Nerd	<embed src="http://www.cewip.org/dictionary/food/v1/hamburguer_eng.mp3" autostart="TRUE" hidden="TRUE" loop="TRUE"> Last edited by Astrocloud; 08-31-2005 at 01:56 PM..

08-31-2005, 01:58 PM	#170 (permalink)
Astrocloud Apocalypse Nerd	<embed src="http://www.cewip.org/dictionary/food/v1/hamburger_de.mp3" autostart="TRUE" hidden="true" loop="TRUE">

08-31-2005, 08:00 PM	#171 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	*puts thread in space probe and sets course for the center of the sun

09-01-2005, 04:53 AM	#172 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	...ain't no stoppin' us now! __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

09-01-2005, 05:08 AM	#173 (permalink)
Astrocloud Apocalypse Nerd	To the center of the SUN!

09-08-2005, 01:06 PM	#174 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	The carnage continues... __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

10-07-2005, 05:37 PM	#175 (permalink)
Ishmal Wicked Clown Location: House Of Horrors	__________________ "Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular."

10-07-2005, 06:10 PM	#176 (permalink)
Ishmal Wicked Clown Location: House Of Horrors	and one about GH's little brother... __________________ "Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular."

10-08-2005, 07:15 AM	#177 (permalink)
Astrocloud Apocalypse Nerd	Stop helping the Hamburger.

11-04-2005, 10:13 AM	#178 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit

11-25-2005, 12:59 PM	#180 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	Behold! The makings of an unholy feast. While most are pleased to take part, others hold up a hand of caution. Size matters!!!. The master demands only the hottest of fires from the best of wood. The high preists intone the incantations... Insidious granishes are prepared for it unholy raiment... Sound the klaxons! Slay the virgins! Woe to thee who does not bow before greatness! And his body was dressed in only the finest of garnishes and cheeses... In honour of our dark lord do we here slay his only begotten son! UNHOLY COMMUNION DIDST COMMENCE! __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

11-25-2005, 01:23 PM	#181 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	That was quite beautiful. *wipes tear Until now, I had never seen a hamburger so large in captivity.

11-29-2005, 09:36 AM	#182 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	__________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

12-15-2005, 09:10 PM	#183 (permalink)
Ishmal Wicked Clown Location: House Of Horrors	__________________ "Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular."

01-11-2006, 01:46 PM	#184 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Hail Citizens! I actually do have a secret. If the stars align just right, there will be a new tiny hamburger in my life. The mothership is scheduled to land in July. I expect to be eaten by my teaming brood ere this year is through. Remember me fondly, -GH

01-11-2006, 01:52 PM	#185 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	This is frightening news. The power of Burger Giganticus continues to grown and spread. Heed my warning for soon there will not be enough condiments to go around. __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

01-11-2006, 01:53 PM	#186 (permalink)
maleficent Junkie Moderator Emeritus Location: Chicago	ooooh that's so exciting--- is this a new little meatball? Congratulations oh exaulted hamburger... __________________ Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.

01-11-2006, 02:49 PM	#187 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Fear the frothing black sperm of my loins! I will cover your puny planet with my fecund seed before you can mobilize any effective resistance. Your fertile women and their soon to be distended abdomens will burst forth a veritable army of my minions. Just reading this post has a 38% chance of impregnating you.

01-11-2006, 03:03 PM	#188 (permalink)
Fremen With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much Location: left side of my couch, East Texas	Congrats on your new forthcoming wee burger, GH. I hope you and the Mrs. have a safe and healthy time of it. Now, if only my giant burger gestation period was through. __________________ Google

01-11-2006, 04:02 PM	#190 (permalink)
rlynnm Psycho Location: so cal	No wonder I felt queasy this morning. You shall be hearing from my lawyer oh Great sandwhich of sandwhiches. __________________ The hardest thing is to be honest with yourself, especially if that means completely redefining the world you've come to know. Don't look too hard, I'm right in front of you.

01-11-2006, 05:00 PM	#191 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	All of the lawyers work for Giant Hamburger... haven't you been following this thread? He is everywhere and you are next. __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

01-12-2006, 06:43 AM	#194 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	It's too late... the Burger Baby cometh! http://hongkong.neuerordner.de/archi...y_sandwich.jpg __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

01-12-2006, 07:38 AM	#195 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Hail to all my future Baby Mommas! Please send your entire catalog of illegitimate hamburgearian offspring to the North Pole for processing and reclamation. You will be compensated for time spent in gestation. I prefer medium rare. Over and out. -GH

01-18-2006, 10:35 AM	#196 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	__________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

01-20-2006, 12:04 PM	#197 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	Hail GH! I arise from my slumber to find your glorious news! Congrats on the... mini-burger? Slider? Know that a feast will be held in your honour at the 'Bot's humble abode. Do not try and stop the Giant Hamburger my friends, do not even try and contain him. __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

01-25-2006, 11:58 PM	#198 (permalink)
Nancy Femme Fatale Location: Elysium	A birthday gift for the forthcoming Burger Jr. .. - A Burger Climb!! __________________ I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.

01-26-2006, 12:49 PM	#199 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Do not draw the attention of my spermatozoa! It is always in search mode. You have been warned. "Love," -GH