Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > The Academy > Tilted Sexuality


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 08-12-2008, 07:10 AM   #1 (permalink)
Upright
 
Problem with Girlfriend's ex

Hello everyone,

So here's the story, my girlfriend and I love each other very much. The thing is that she had an ex that they went out with for 3 years. Although shes over her ex, and hes moved away from us, I still feel troubled by him. First off, they were sexually active and her and I are also sexually active..but whenever I think about them doing it, I feel troubled. She first told me they did it once....then when I asked her again she said it was unwanted multiple times. Worse thing is that I got so curious that I looked in her email and found conversations about them 2 and how they love making love to each other. I know i'm being paranoid..but how can I cope with this? I love her really much and just want these bad feelings to go away...what should I do?

I know I just need to forget about him and focus on her and I but how will I know shes not comparing me to him?

or even better: how can I move on and forget about him?
RobZero is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 07:35 AM   #2 (permalink)
will always be an Alyson Hanniganite
 
Bill O'Rights's Avatar
 
Location: In the dust of the archives
Couple of questions;

1. Is this your first girlfriend?

2. Is this your...first...girlfriend?

3. Do you know the ex?

Ok, so it was a few questions. Sue me.
__________________
"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony

"Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus

It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.
Bill O'Rights is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 07:42 AM   #3 (permalink)
Junkie
 
kutulu's Avatar
 
Dude are you 15? If you are going to be a functional person in a relationship you're going to need to recognize that your girl wasn't a virgin before you. Who cares where she was before, she's with you now.
kutulu is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 07:48 AM   #4 (permalink)
Asshole
 
The_Jazz's Avatar
 
Administrator
Location: Chicago
Damn it, BOR beat me to ANOTHER thread.

Answer his questions, and I think you'll find some assistance.
The_Jazz is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 08:27 AM   #5 (permalink)
Submit to me, you know you want to
 
ShaniFaye's Avatar
 
Location: Lilburn, Ga
warning, this is going to be harsh

you really dont need to be in a relationship if you havent learned that snooping around in her email is not the right nor the mature thing to do

would someone tell me how you can love someone soooo much and then invade their privacy like that?
__________________
I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!
ShaniFaye is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 08:32 AM   #6 (permalink)
change is hard.
 
thespian86's Avatar
 
Location: the green room.
Aw, I was pumped to spill some advice on this kid.

But come on guys, lets try to remember a time when you weren't the older, wiser versions of yourself.

Hey man, I went through this phase when I was really young, and maybe you're a late bloomer. If you are under 18 then you can't post here, sorry, but if you are then I would suggest the following. Talk to her. Listen to her. Think before acting. Grow up [and that isn't a mean GROW UP DOOFUS! and more of a grow up and learn from it].
__________________
EX: Whats new?
ME: I officially love coffee more then you now.
EX: uh...
ME: So, not much.
thespian86 is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 08:47 AM   #7 (permalink)
Upright
 
lotsofmagnets's Avatar
 
Location: reykjavík, iceland
+1 to shanifaye

just how old are you? that sort of paranoia i´d reserve for a 14 year old. obviously you don´t trust her at all.
__________________
mother nature made the aeroplane, and the submarine sandwich, with the steady hands and dead eye of a remarkable sculptor.
she shed her mountain turning training wheels, for the convenience of the moving sidewalk, that delivers the magnetic monkey children through the mouth of impossible calendar clock, into the devil's manhole cauldron.
physics of a bicycle, isn't it remarkable?
lotsofmagnets is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 08:55 AM   #8 (permalink)
Currently sour but formerly Dlishs
 
dlish's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: Australia/UAE
rob,

i'd have zero confidence in you if i was her and dump you in a flash for doing shit like that.
__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy
dlish is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 08:58 AM   #9 (permalink)
Lover - Protector - Teacher
 
Jinn's Avatar
 
Location: Seattle, WA
I think you should go have sex with a random girl to spite her and her previously promiscuous ways.

It's really the only destructive behavior you could do here that you haven't already.
__________________
"I'm typing on a computer of science, which is being sent by science wires to a little science server where you can access it. I'm not typing on a computer of philosophy or religion or whatever other thing you think can be used to understand the universe because they're a poor substitute in the role of understanding the universe which exists independent from ourselves." - Willravel
Jinn is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 08:58 AM   #10 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
Willravel's Avatar
 
I think the trouble with a SO's exes can often be an extension of trust issues. I'm sure most people would like to think, I trust my SO, but it's his/her ex I don't trust!, but really unless you're worried about physical or emotional attacks from the individual, for which there are other options, it might be that you're still learning to trust your SO. There's not necessarily anything wrong with that, I mean you can't trust someone you just met, but if you've been together a while and you still don't trust them then you might want to figure out if that's either you being paranoid or them not actually being trustworthy.

Best of luck.
Willravel is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 09:34 AM   #11 (permalink)
Upright
 
k guys....yeah I'm 18..I guess always a late bloomer :/

but this is how it went...she found out about the email crap...got mad...i was sincerely sorry had a long talk with her...but now things are good...long talk meaning a shit long of a talk.

any other advice at all? Cause I love her so to spend my whole life with her.
I know I shouldnt check her email...trust me.....not gonna do that again....idk I'm guessing I just have to know that she loves me and her ex is history right...and just focus on her and I?
RobZero is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 09:43 AM   #12 (permalink)
Forming
 
Punk.of.Ages's Avatar
 
Location: ....a state of pure inebriation.
Everybody has a past my friend. There's no escaping that. You either need to learn to accept that or most likely spend your life a paranoid lonely man.

I wouldn't put too much thought into who she's been with before and whether or not she's comparing you to them. She almost certainly is. The thing you need to remember is who she's dating now. There's a reason for that.

One piece of advice: Stay out of her e-mail, text messages, or anything else that's hers and not yours. Most people don't like privacy invasion no matter how close they are to the person invading. It's just bad news, and it's none of your business.

As long as you remain paranoid, possessive, and intrusive you won't be able to establish trust in this relationship. As long as you can't establish trust you won't be able to establish any kind of real connection either.

Just remember she's another person like you, not an item.
__________________
"The fact is that censorship always defeats its own purpose, for it creates, in the end, the kind of society that is incapable of exercising real discretion..." - Henry Steel Commager

"Punk rock music is great music played by really bad, drunk musicians." -Fat Mike
Punk.of.Ages is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 10:51 AM   #13 (permalink)
Tilted
 
buttless1der's Avatar
 
Location: Willamette Valley
Ultimately her past is really none of your business unless she chooses to share it with you. You need to fully appreciate the fact that YOU invaded HER privacy by snooping in her email. If you are unable to accept that she had a life prior to meeting you break it off because you are not mature enough to handle a relationship at this point in your life.

I am not trying to be mean or cold hearted, just realistic.
__________________
The measure of any government is how they allow their citizenry to defend themselves.
-Ted Nugent
buttless1der is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 10:58 AM   #14 (permalink)
Here
 
World's King's Avatar
 
Location: Denver City Denver
Grow up.
__________________
heavy is the head that wears the crown
World's King is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 11:03 AM   #15 (permalink)
Addict
 
Nobody bagging on the girlfriend for saying they only did it once, then coming back that they did it a few times but she didn't really want to?

meh. You're both too young and inexperienced in the ways of adult interaction to be thinking about "I love her so to spend my whole life with her".
tooth is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 11:55 AM   #16 (permalink)
Broken Arrow
 
Vigilante's Avatar
 
Location: US
Drop the past man. That's it. It isn't even your past.
__________________
We contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
-Winston Churchill
Vigilante is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 12:03 PM   #17 (permalink)
We work alone
 
LoganSnake's Avatar
 
Location: Cake Town
I never thought I would be saying this...holy shit...

Dude, you got some growing up to do. If your girlfriend's past bothers you, you shouldn't be in a relationship, period. Most girls you will meet will have a past. If you freak out about every one, might as well be single. It's none of your business.

God, I feel dirty. Gonna go prepare for my midlife crisis in 28 years...
__________________
Maturity is knowing you were an idiot in the past. Wisdom is knowing that you'll be an idiot in the future. Common sense is knowing that you should try not to be an idiot now. - J. Jacques
LoganSnake is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 12:16 PM   #18 (permalink)
Poo-tee-weet?
 
JStrider's Avatar
 
Location: The Woodlands, TX
makes me think of clerks....
__________________
-=JStrider=-

~Clatto Verata Nicto
JStrider is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 12:41 PM   #19 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Borla's Avatar
 
I'd be more concerned about the fact that she isn't honest. The past is the past, but I can't stand being with someone who lies to me, even if (sometimes ESPECIALLY if) it is to tell me what they think I want to hear instead of the truth.
__________________
Coimhéad fearg fhear na foighde!!!!
Borla is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 12:55 PM   #20 (permalink)
Upright
 
lotsofmagnets's Avatar
 
Location: reykjavík, iceland
Quote:
Originally Posted by World's King View Post
Grow up.
+1
__________________
mother nature made the aeroplane, and the submarine sandwich, with the steady hands and dead eye of a remarkable sculptor.
she shed her mountain turning training wheels, for the convenience of the moving sidewalk, that delivers the magnetic monkey children through the mouth of impossible calendar clock, into the devil's manhole cauldron.
physics of a bicycle, isn't it remarkable?
lotsofmagnets is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 01:02 PM   #21 (permalink)
Broken Arrow
 
Vigilante's Avatar
 
Location: US
Borla:
Well that's a slippery slope. Have you never lied to a significant other? Bigger question, are you married, dating, or single? If married, and you have lied or not confessed something at all, would you be willing to come out with it just to get it off your chest? There comes a point when you have to let go of their past, and your own. Once one understands this, things like how many times a previous SO did your SO becomes somewhat trivial.

He's not been 100% with her either. He snooped her email. She didn't fess up to all the sex. So what? These are things young people do. One wants to know everything (curiosity killed the cat, remember that) and the other wants to spare his feelings. His nosiness is the stronger act (proactive snooping, not passive reading) and her's was wrong, but still relatively passive and perhaps even a non-issue. If the roles were reversed there would be different posts here (she's psycho, he's a pig...to some degree or another), but that is the double standard we all live with.

Being married for nearly 12 years, I can tell you that sometimes truths hurt more than lies. It is experience that gives you the ability to judge which is better for a given situation, and age that gives you the ability to be more prudent as you get older. 18 year olds will always screw up, and if the other person can understand that, then they can make it provided everything else is great. If they can't let it go, then it won't last.

With this in mind, our marriage is great now. We had a crazy time getting here and made some mistakes, but nothing that wasn't forgivable. When this topic comes up, I always think of Depeche Mode's Policy of Truth. The words to that are gospel for any relationship on the rocks.
__________________
We contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
-Winston Churchill
Vigilante is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 01:43 PM   #22 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Ayashe's Avatar
 
She wasn't up front because she did not want you to think badly of her. Their relationship was for 3 years, it is not as though she was picking random guys from the bar all the time. It doesn't mean anything, in fact I think that it really is not an issue that should be openly discussed for the most part. I seriously hesitate when asked by a partner in answering how many partners that I have had. It is not that I feel it is an extreme figure at all. The issue is that so many men are quick to label a female as a slut/whore etc without factoring in that these relationships were longterm. Each relationship is different, each partnership is like a snowflake. Sex even with the same person is(or at least should be) unique in some way each time.

Look at it this way, she is with you now. You hold her for a reason, you provide to her something that makes her want to be with you and not him.
Ayashe is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 02:11 PM   #23 (permalink)
Tilted
 
buttless1der's Avatar
 
Location: Willamette Valley
I suggest sticking with Thumbelina and her four sisters because you are fully aware of their past and they know exactly what you like.

If you have a problem with their past you are a lost cause.
__________________
The measure of any government is how they allow their citizenry to defend themselves.
-Ted Nugent
buttless1der is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 02:48 PM   #24 (permalink)
Upright
 
yeah i think i'm insecure/clingy/all that other bullshit. I understand why I have these bad habits but know how to get rid of them

idk but I see what you guys are saying....no this isnt my first relationship..i've had others but maybe I'm understanding why they are failing.....yeah I know..loser...but hopefully it will work out with this one


but its all good, I'll work on getting rid of these bad habits of mine.... thx so much for the advice

Last edited by RobZero; 08-12-2008 at 03:04 PM..
RobZero is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 05:36 PM   #25 (permalink)
MSD
The sky calls to us ...
 
MSD's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: CT
Quote:
Originally Posted by World's King View Post
Grow up.
What he said.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobZero View Post
idk but I see what you guys are saying....no this isnt my first relationship..i've had others but maybe I'm understanding why they are failing.....yeah I know..loser...but hopefully it will work out with this one
Did you read what you said before? That stuff about being ready to spend the rest of your life with her? You're young, you're mentally and emotionally immature, and you can't stand the thought of someone you love having been with someone else. She's with you , not her ex; there's a reason for that and if you can't trust someone you're in such a loving relationship with you shouldn't be in that relationship.
MSD is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 07:16 PM   #26 (permalink)
zomgomgomgomgomgomg
 
telekinetic's Avatar
 
Location: Fauxenix, Azerona
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobZero View Post
yeah i think i'm insecure/clingy/all that other bullshit. I understand why I have these bad habits but know how to get rid of them

idk but I see what you guys are saying....no this isnt my first relationship..i've had others but maybe I'm understanding why they are failing.....yeah I know..loser...but hopefully it will work out with this one


but its all good, I'll work on getting rid of these bad habits of mine.... thx so much for the advice
So is she bothered by the fact that you've slept with all these other girls?
telekinetic is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 07:31 PM   #27 (permalink)
Upright
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by twistedmosaic View Post
So is she bothered by the fact that you've slept with all these other girls?
didnt sleep with them...she was my first
RobZero is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 07:36 PM   #28 (permalink)
change is hard.
 
thespian86's Avatar
 
Location: the green room.
hahahaha When is it that everyone here became a "say it bluntly" douche? Always one to defend, I have to say this is getting silly. Yeah, he has some growing up to do, but Rob isn't denying that. And repeating it over and over again isn't helping.

Maybe it's just me but there is advice to give here.

Rob: Hey man. Yeah, you do need to grow up a bit but who doesn't; we are all growing up all the time. Right now, you're at that point where relationships become a more important part of your life; you are almost in the position to learn how to share your life. I know you care about this girl but there are two ways to go right now.

a) You leave her; you're young, this is complicated, you're uncomfortable, and sex isn't everything.

b) Stay with her.

If we are gonna go with b) then here are a couple of things I'd suggest.

1) Work on yourself dude. Life is crazy; a constant test. Since time doesn't stop there is no time like the present to make yourself a better you; not to suggest that you aren't a great guy, in fact I mean to infer the opposite. You obviously don't think highly of yourself, at least not enough confidence to think that your current girlfriend wouldn't cheat on you, or that you aren't good enough to do this. I know you probably say it out loud, "I am confident" or at least with a little more subtly, but it's more about believing it. Believe in yourself and that will make the world go round.

2) Start talking to her more; not endless, loop filled, cyclical conversations that 18 year old guys have with their 18 year old girlfriends. This is where the growing up thing comes in. Part of growing up isn't just acting the part (serious relationship, job, house, etc) it's about understanding the importance of those things. So step up as a man and talk more; communication is the most important part of a relationship; trust me.

3) Be yourself. Don't change yourself. Become yourself more. Don't listen to assholes, on here or elsewhere, that tell you that you need to become a different person; just build on the person you already are.

Either way you're a nice guy man, and obviously want to fix and build. Just do it. That's growing up; just doing it, instead of talking about it.

- Taylor
__________________
EX: Whats new?
ME: I officially love coffee more then you now.
EX: uh...
ME: So, not much.
thespian86 is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 08:16 PM   #29 (permalink)
Upright
 
hey thx alot taylor, i'll go with b and take your advice
RobZero is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 10:47 PM   #30 (permalink)
But You'll Never Prove It.
 
ItWasMe's Avatar
 
Location: under your bed
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobZero View Post
yeah i think i'm insecure/clingy/all that other bullshit. I understand why I have these bad habits but know how to get rid of them

idk but I see what you guys are saying....no this isnt my first relationship..i've had others but maybe I'm understanding why they are failing.....yeah I know..loser...but hopefully it will work out with this one


but its all good, I'll work on getting rid of these bad habits of mine.... thx so much for the advice
I'm going to guess that you haven't been together long, and that's part of why this ex bothers you so? Do you think you would feel differently, less threatened if they had been together for 6 months instead of 3 years? Maybe it's just because she was your first, but you were not hers. It may help you to address that insecurity if you know why it exists.

I think most people have had failed relationships. Sometimes because we made mistakes, sometimes because we were just incompatible. That doesn't mean the people themselves are failures or losers. So don't be so hard on yourself. Many of us handled situations differently in the past then we would now. The trick is to learn from your own experiences. And when you can, the experiences of others. That's what growing is about, which most of us are doing. It sounds like you are trying to do that.

If you think you are insecure and clingy, it is good that you understand why. But does she see this, and understand why? If not, that may be a good topic to discuss sometime. Some things you have to work through on your own. Some things you can work through with your partner. Either way, it is easier to deal with things when your partner knows where you are coming from.

I don't necessarily mean *change* into a different person. PunkMusician gave excellent advice. I am talking about working on your traits/reactions that you personally don't like. Not the ones that other people think you should change. Being happy with yourself is a good goal.

Remember you must be doing something right; she is choosing to be with you now.
__________________
. . . . . . . . . . . . . .


"Ok, no more truth-or-dare until somebody returns my underwear" ~ George Lopez

I bake cookies just so I can lick the bowl. ~ ItWasMe


Last edited by ItWasMe; 08-12-2008 at 10:53 PM.. Reason: typo
ItWasMe is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 11:05 PM   #31 (permalink)
Upright
 
I have a pointless idea it will not solve your problem with the girl. But it will make sure he does not have any relevance to her again,

3 foot iron bar to his hands and feet for a couple of hours till he is crippled for life!
This is a bit excessive and if you get caught your new boyfriends will love and care for you every night till your little concerns seem to have no meaning

Peace be with you
dragonzzz is offline  
Old 08-12-2008, 11:17 PM   #32 (permalink)
Forming
 
Punk.of.Ages's Avatar
 
Location: ....a state of pure inebriation.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dragonzzz View Post
I have a pointless idea it will not solve your problem with the girl. But it will make sure he does not have any relevance to her again,

3 foot iron bar to his hands and feet for a couple of hours till he is crippled for life!
This is a bit excessive and if you get caught your new boyfriends will love and care for you every night till your little concerns seem to have no meaning

Peace be with you
__________________
"The fact is that censorship always defeats its own purpose, for it creates, in the end, the kind of society that is incapable of exercising real discretion..." - Henry Steel Commager

"Punk rock music is great music played by really bad, drunk musicians." -Fat Mike
Punk.of.Ages is offline  
Old 08-13-2008, 06:42 AM   #33 (permalink)
Upright
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ItWasMe View Post
I'm going to guess that you haven't been together long, and that's part of why this ex bothers you so? Do you think you would feel differently, less threatened if they had been together for 6 months instead of 3 years? Maybe it's just because she was your first, but you were not hers.
yeah i think thats it....whenever I think of them...idk why..i get this nauseating feeling. I guess this will just take time and not think about them....cause like you guys said....shes with me instead of him

Quote:
Originally Posted by ItWasMe View Post
If you think you are insecure and clingy, it is good that you understand why. But does she see this, and understand why? If not, that may be a good topic to discuss sometime. Some things you have to work through on your own. Some things you can work through with your partner. Either way, it is easier to deal with things when your partner knows where you are coming from.
well I think I start to be clingy whenever I think about her and her ex....i can tell shes a little bit annoyed when I get clingy...like its where i start to say i love you a million times while she gets annoyed and just shakes her head...i know she loves me but she prolly gets annoyed when I get clingy. I dont really want to address it to her...cause what if shes not seeing it? then she will be looking for me being clingy. So maybe being more confident would help not me being clingy...


also, dont really want to tell her all this drama...she hates drama...so I feel like if i work out my insecurities and troublesomes about her ex then I could be a better man. Cause she says shes over him...he made her life a shit while they were dating...so I dont really want to bring up her ex over and over. Yeah, sometimes I feel like a rebound...but I think thats just the insecurity thinking and I got to get over that.
RobZero is offline  
Old 08-13-2008, 07:00 AM   #34 (permalink)
People in masks cannot be trusted
 
Xazy's Avatar
 
Location: NYC
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobZero View Post
yeah i think thats it....whenever I think of them...idk why..i get this nauseating feeling. I guess this will just take time and not think about them....cause like you guys said....shes with me instead of him



well I think I start to be clingy whenever I think about her and her ex....i can tell shes a little bit annoyed when I get clingy...like its where i start to say i love you a million times while she gets annoyed and just shakes her head...i know she loves me but she prolly gets annoyed when I get clingy. I dont really want to address it to her...cause what if shes not seeing it? then she will be looking for me being clingy. So maybe being more confident would help not me being clingy...


also, dont really want to tell her all this drama...she hates drama...so I feel like if i work out my insecurities and troublesomes about her ex then I could be a better man. Cause she says shes over him...he made her life a shit while they were dating...so I dont really want to bring up her ex over and over. Yeah, sometimes I feel like a rebound...but I think thats just the insecurity thinking and I got to get over that.


She does not like super clingy so stop it, or move on, relationship is about compromise, and small stuff like that kill one. Anyone you ever date will have a history look in the mirror, that is who the person is with now, so stop worrying about the past or she will not be with you longer. You know she hates drama so why are you invading her privacy why are you making issues out of something where there is none.

If you can not do that, then consider for yourself and for her to move on since you are sabotaging your relationship.
Xazy is offline  
Old 08-13-2008, 08:40 AM   #35 (permalink)
Upright
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Xazy View Post
She does not like super clingy so stop it, or move on, relationship is about compromise, and small stuff like that kill one. Anyone you ever date will have a history look in the mirror, that is who the person is with now, so stop worrying about the past or she will not be with you longer. You know she hates drama so why are you invading her privacy why are you making issues out of something where there is none.

If you can not do that, then consider for yourself and for her to move on since you are sabotaging your relationship.
like I said we had a long talk and we're good...I just need to get rid of my insecurities
RobZero is offline  
Old 08-17-2008, 12:56 PM   #36 (permalink)
I want a Plaid crayon
 
Plaid13's Avatar
 
Sounds like she was dishonest and you only found out because you were doing something dishonest... Seems you both have a lot to work on. Would worry about that a lot more then what she did with the ex. Trust is something that has to be earned and misplaced trust can be worse then anything. Trust me i know i went out with Satan for a while. I never would have let it go as long as it did if she would have just told me she was the devil to start with. If your not comfortable with anything about her or what shes done... just slow down. Give yourself time to think about it.
Plaid13 is offline  
Old 08-17-2008, 07:29 PM   #37 (permalink)
Upright
 
Just assume that her ex has the biggest, fattest, most ridiculously awesome cock that was ever possessed by any male in the history of male-dom. Now assume that he knew how to use it, constantly giving her orgasm after earth-shattering orgasm until she'd lapse into sweaty unconsciousness. They'd fuck in ways that most people would only dream of for 16 hour stretches stopping only for bathroom breaks, food, and to wring out the sheets. Think about that for a good hour or so. Got it? Good. Now in case you haven't noticed already, she's with you. YOU, not him. She's decided that Captian Fantasticock really desn't have all that much going for him and figures that she's a lot happier with Rob Zero. Why? You'll never know, and I can guarantee she'll never tell you. All you can do is make it worth it for her. Read a book, go lift some weights, learn to appreciate fine wine or some shit. Find something you enjoy and get really good at it (the art of fucking might not be a bad place to start). Whatever builds up your confidence. Seriously, unless you're confident in both yourself and in her choice in you, your relationship won't amount to much. You'll just spend the rest of your time together sizing up every swingin' dick around her and trying to decide which one she's going to drop you for, wasting valuable time that you could be using towards actually being happy.

Good luck. Confidence is hard work but I think you can do it.
El Conquistador is offline  
Old 08-17-2008, 09:47 PM   #38 (permalink)
Addict
 
curiousbear's Avatar
 
Location: WA
You are very good and your feelings are natural. But you must grow out of it and make sure you build a relationship with her. Build trust, faith and committment. please stop worrying about what she thinks, and whether she compares are not! Be concerned about how she would feel, and care more about HER not you. I assure you are possessive and you will make a good lover. But please put her as first instead of your feelings...
curiousbear is offline  
Old 08-18-2008, 10:17 AM   #39 (permalink)
Insane
 
speshul-k's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by kutulu View Post
Dude are you 15? If you are going to be a functional person in a relationship you're going to need to recognize that your girl wasn't a virgin before you. Who cares where she was before, she's with you now.
Pretty much bang on the money here, you just need to accept that she's been with other guys etc and that now she's with you. Accept it, be happy and try not to think about the ex.

Everyone will be alot happier.
speshul-k is offline  
 

Tags
girlfriend, problem

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 09:01 AM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360