Uncle Phil doesn't really play golf. It's a cover for his actual favorite hobby: square-dancing.

Mixedmedia's index fingers are longer than her middle fingers. That's A) why she always wears fingerless gloves and B) finger-paints with her toes.

aberkok strove to be the best pianist in the world, but realized he just wanted to sit around at home eating poutine.

Fremen is only sexually attracted to mustachioed nuns.

The_Jazz and Crompstar secretly ran off to Vermont and got married by a drunk catholic priest who they paid in gold coins. Cromp is the little spoon.

the lord of the garden can only type with two fingers...

I heard that one time uncle phil ran out of BBQ sauce, so he used ketchup. He was actually confronted about it, but just screamed "WHAT BETTER TO PUT ON MY WEINER"

paddyjoe and Flyman have swapped underwear for "the experience"

Lucifer wears a kilt for "easy access" for crew on those lonely nights upon the open water.

Eden actually drinks those girly fruit COCKtail drinks...........not rum.

Fly smokes grass, fo realz, yo!

St. Augustine, Kentucky Blue Grass, Ryegrass, Creeping Red Fescue, Bent Grass (putting greens), Zoysia, Centipede, Bahia Grass, etc.

He's allergic to the bud.

Fremen masturbates with sock puppets.

mm brings joy to all by showing everyone her mastectomy scar...

uncle phil fell down a well as a child.


some think he's still down there......

paddyjoe was an exotic dancer to put himself through school

FuglyStick went to school to become an exotic dancer.

That's true

Baraka Guru was my best tipper

Despite his sophisticated mien, Baraka Guru was born in Mud Lick, Kentucky and plays a mean washtub bass.

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yikes! FuglyStick is actually Jerry Lewis.

Hey, laaaady

mixed media was the "unseen nymphette" during Rob Lowe's tryst at the Democratic National Convention

that's sooo jerry lewis...

fug's navel ring started to tarnish, which led to his current condition of "ring around the navel..."

Most of Uncle Phil's clothes are woven from toilet paper.

Ratbastid smells like a wet flannel.

daniel has a cyst under his armpit the size of a football...

^^ Once the dude gets started on bowling on Wii Sports, there's no stopping him. He hogs the controller no matter how many eight-year-olds are in the room. He gets so focused he can't even hear the crying.

phil gets all his material from the back of 1970's breakfast cereal packets.

daniel's wife actually made him do it......not the devil.

Fly is a narc.

^ then there's that other scar...

unc p traded in his 'Vette for a pre-owned beige Miata.

Fremen washes in water, and runs it down the drain!

Oh, no you di'int!!

Daniel the Redneck, has bad teeth, eats boiled meat and talks with a Cockney accent.

Fremen cried when bambi died

Daniel_ was hit in the head with a meteorite and has no memory of his past life, so he decided he would be a super ninja pirate assassin and ended up in a mental institution for several years until a profit visited and gave him the name of Daniel_.

Jove has a phobia of pools ever since he had a bad experience with a pump while masturbating.

Sheesus licks tramps.

So I heard that Daniel had an old nickname from grade school... They called him "Toolongforjew" Which is due to the fact that his fingers were way too long for the average jewish person to have. Ahh those crazy 5th graders.

Light of Icarus was raised as a girl.

mixedmedia slept with half the chess team from Oklahoma State. That was one happy dude.

Popinjay's real name is actually jay.

As a kid, if things had gone missing in class, they'd turn up in jay's ass.

Hence "Pop-in-Jay"

Daniel_ tried out for the role of Robin Hood in school, but didn't get the part due to his excessive stroking of Little John's staff.