Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > The Academy > Tilted Sexuality


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 07-16-2010, 02:07 AM   #1 (permalink)
Crazy
 
citadel's Avatar
 
Location: Yonder
Question for the ladies: an amazing partner?

I'm a guy and I'd like to know for future reference...

Ladies, what are some of the characteristics that have been the difference between you having an average or so-so sex partner and an amazing sex partner? Tips, pointers, thoughts, advice much appreciated.
citadel is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 07:43 PM   #2 (permalink)
MSD
The sky calls to us ...
 
MSD's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: CT
Tradition holds that you answer your own question, even if you only say a bit.

What have you done that made you outstanding to your ladies?
MSD is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 07:51 PM   #3 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Wow, a question that you could basically pour Tilted Sexuality into without any spillover.

I'm not a girl but word on the street places respect and good communication skills high on the wish list and more important than having a purple-headed warrior the size of a baguette and abs like Christian Bale. If you're referring to physical acts like being able to tie their clit in a knot through awesome cunnilingus or how you don't try to shove your thumb in their ass on the second date... you'll have to be more specific. This question is so broad that makes the Grand Canyon look like the gap between Letterman's teeth.

Turns out the things that turn on women often turn on men... or humans in general. Being in tune to and providing for the specific desires of your partner is where you get the magic. Good lovers aren't just men or women, they're people that know how to please other people. It's more than just physical traits; plenty of "hot" people suck in bed.

...

RE: OP

Example: I had a partner that was very proper in public and expected to be treated as such. It was annoying at times. "You can't touch my tush outside the movie theater... people are watching." When we got home? Dirty girl deluxe. I had to get used to the on/off switch. So I catered to her bipolar sex drive. She was happy* with my efforts.

*As happy as a woman can be given her occupation, my occupation, and a combined sex drive that would make a porn star take a knee.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Last edited by Plan9; 07-16-2010 at 08:02 PM..
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 07:51 PM   #4 (permalink)
Crazy
 
citadel's Avatar
 
Location: Yonder
Quote:
Originally Posted by MSD View Post
Tradition holds that you answer your own question, even if you only say a bit.

What have you done that made you outstanding to your ladies?
I'm a total virgin, so there's no way I could answer. I'm here to learn more than anything.
citadel is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 08:03 PM   #5 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Total virgin, huh? Have you tried online dating? Great place for virgins to start.

That or a truck stop.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 08:28 PM   #6 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
Baraka_Guru's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: East-central Canada
Question for the pilots: an amazing flier?

Pilots, what is the best way to fly planes? Cessna, 737, F-22, whatever...

Tips, pointers, thoughts, advice much appreciated.



Spoiler: Dude, they're women. There is no easy answer. At least planes come with manuals..... But at least you can muck around with women and not worry about crashing in a ball of flames into the Atlantic.... not literally, anyway....
__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

Last edited by Baraka_Guru; 07-16-2010 at 08:30 PM..
Baraka_Guru is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 08:30 PM   #7 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Just because your last girlfriend was a creaky old C-130 doesn't mean you have to be bitter, Baraka.

...

That waitress at Happy's down on 3rd street? Whew... she was a total F-16.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 08:32 PM   #8 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
Baraka_Guru's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: East-central Canada
Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9
Just because your last girlfriend was a creaky old C-130 doesn't mean you have to be bitter, Baraka.
But ho-lee-sheeyat was that a spectacular crash!
__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

Last edited by Baraka_Guru; 07-16-2010 at 08:34 PM..
Baraka_Guru is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 08:37 PM   #9 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Huh, and I thought you green-light-go'd it.

...

Outta the dozen or so I've been with, I'd say the best partners were the ones that were into breakfast blowjobs.

Seriously. Oral sex will compensate for a lack of education, goals, or the ability to go without crying for 72 hours.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 08:41 PM   #10 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
Baraka_Guru's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: East-central Canada
But the pilot analogy works. One should approach women and sexual relationships as a pilot does flying a plane.

More specifically, one should go all Chuck Yeager and treat it like a test flight. Take her out, lift her up, and really test her out and see how many Gs you can pull off of her. You won't know the limitations and how she likes to move unless you push the boundaries.
__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
Baraka_Guru is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 08:45 PM   #11 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
I like where this is going. You push it as hard as you can until she stalls, hit the flaps, and throw her into a cockpit-down-engine-up spiral until splashdown.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 08:51 PM   #12 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
Baraka_Guru's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: East-central Canada
Pretty much. But you have to bear in mind that over the long term you need to consider metal fatigue.
__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
Baraka_Guru is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 09:09 PM   #13 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Yeah, sometimes ya gotta trade her in a younger model. Especially when she requires a communications overhaul. Nothing worse than going from two clicks of squelch to signal a low and sideways deep throat drop to coming up with a fuckin' op order for something as simple as opening the damn cargo ramp.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-16-2010, 10:21 PM   #14 (permalink)
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
 
Daniel_'s Avatar
 
Location: Southern England
So it's all about climbing the zigurat and pushing the envelope?

As a general rule, I have always found that as a guy, if I do stuff to get me off I can end up getting off today.

If I do stuff to get her off, I end up getting off today, tomorrow and the day after.

Key advice: leave her wanting another go. That you tried to please her is usually more important than whether you managed THIS TIME. If you have the will but not the technique, you are a better investment for her than if you have the technique but not the will.

"Want to but can't" > "can but doesn't want to"
__________________
╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
Daniel_ is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 01:16 AM   #15 (permalink)
Crazy
 
citadel's Avatar
 
Location: Yonder
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru View Post
Question for the pilots: an amazing flier?

Pilots, what is the best way to fly planes? Cessna, 737, F-22, whatever...

Tips, pointers, thoughts, advice much appreciated.
I'd like to know some of the characteristics that have been the difference between average and off the charts, if any.
citadel is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 05:00 AM   #16 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
Baraka_Guru's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: East-central Canada
The difference is in whether you're a "reader" or not. Learn to read women in terms of what they say, their body language, their general vibe. Be aware. Don't get overwhelmed by your own senses and desire. In a way, it's like serving and being served rather than just looking out for yourself and what you want.

Oh, and learn how to make use of your tongue and at least a couple of fingers simultaneously (stimultaneously?). If you can make their legs shake, then you know you're doing it right.
__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
Baraka_Guru is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 05:44 AM   #17 (permalink)
Chilled to Perfection
 
ICER's Avatar
 
Location: Dallas, TX
I took some advice from some articles I read in some fitness mags (Men's Health, Men's Fitness, and Men’s Journal) and they have made an amazing difference. My wife said I went from good to "OMG!!!"

And DR Oz has some good advice as well. Here are a few tips
1: Working out, Working up a good sweat at least 30 minutes 3 times a week will help you last longer in bed.
2: Take it slow; don't be in a rush because it takes women a little longer to bring to boil.
3: He there for her; learn how to please her in more then the traditional way

hope that helps
__________________
What's the difference between congress and a penitentiary?
One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers and threats to society.
The other is for housing prisoners.
~~David Letterman
ICER is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 06:28 AM   #18 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
mixedmedia's Avatar
 
Location: Florida
Know 'the lay of the land.' Single most important thing for a lover...especially a beginner. If you're not sure where the clit is, ask for help. We'll be happy to assist you.

And enthusiasm is good, but early in a relationship it's important to keep your wits about you during sex - stay aware. This is largely how you learn what your partner likes and doesn't like. Very important.

An open mind is also very helpful.
__________________
Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
mixedmedia is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 06:30 AM   #19 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru View Post
If you can make their legs shake, then you know you're doing it right.
I got a good joke about this the next time I sent you a PM or whatever. Hah.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 07:42 AM   #20 (permalink)
Paladin of the Palate
 
LordEden's Avatar
 
Location: Redneckville, NC
Quote:
Originally Posted by mixedmedia View Post
And enthusiasm is good, but early in a relationship it's important to keep your wits about you during sex - stay aware.
Yeah, you never know when her Husband is going to get home from work, half loaded from drinking warm beer out the back of his truck bed with a loaded shotgun in his gun rack. "What you dewin' with my woman!" is something you only want to hear once while only wearing your t-shirt.

*****

Please her, literally do everything you can to please her. You can get off in about 30 seconds, unless you are one of the truly lucky ones that get a girl that can get off as fast as a guy, she is going to take awhile to get off.

Sex is not about you and your 30 seconds to mars, it's about pleasing the girl that let you stick your dipstick in her [insert car part name that I don't feel like researching that could be used as a euphemism for a vajayjay].
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru View Post
In my own personal experience---this is just anecdotal, mind you---I have found that there is always room to be found between boobs.
Vice-President of the CinnamonGirl Fan Club - The Meat of the Zombiesquirrel and CinnamonGirl Sandwich
LordEden is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 08:06 AM   #21 (permalink)
Young Crumudgeon
 
Martian's Avatar
 
Location: Canada
Stop-Look-Listen are the three words you need to know. Slow your pasty ass down and try to figure out what's getting her off. Watch how she reacts, listen to her breathing, etc. If you have to, ask her. 'Does that feel good? Do you like that?' you can turn it into a game.

Also? None of this matters. Turns out you can't learn to be a good lover by reading about it; it's a practical skill, and those (as the name implies) take practice.

Aside: Am I the only one who thinks it's odd that there's almost no female input here?
__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame
Martian is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 08:12 AM   #22 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Martian
Aside: Am I the only one who thinks it's odd that there's almost no female input here?
No. They must have jobs that keep them off the NSFW 'net during the day.

...

And I wouldn't listen to Martian, Citadel. He's an ass-slapping womanizer.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 08:20 AM   #23 (permalink)
Paladin of the Palate
 
LordEden's Avatar
 
Location: Redneckville, NC
I wouldn't listen to any of us, we are all male-chauvinistic pigs on this board. I know I make my woman stand in the kitchen barefooted while she cooks me dinner.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru View Post
In my own personal experience---this is just anecdotal, mind you---I have found that there is always room to be found between boobs.
Vice-President of the CinnamonGirl Fan Club - The Meat of the Zombiesquirrel and CinnamonGirl Sandwich
LordEden is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 08:22 AM   #24 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
...but bare-chested is the preferred state of undress for subservience. 'Specially if you like 'maters with yer 'taters.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 08:29 AM   #25 (permalink)
Young Crumudgeon
 
Martian's Avatar
 
Location: Canada
I cannot deny that I'm a prodigious slapper of asses.

You're just bitter because I don't slap yours.
__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame
Martian is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 08:30 AM   #26 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Martian View Post
I cannot deny that I'm a prodigious slapper of asses.

You're just bitter because I don't slap yours.
Pfft. I've seen how you hook your middle finger upon contact.

I don't need my oil checked by a fedora-wearing Canadian.

*cues up Holy Diver as Martian's ass-slapping theme song*
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 12:29 PM   #27 (permalink)
Kick Ass Kunoichi
 
snowy's Avatar
 
Location: Oregon
Quote:
Originally Posted by Martian View Post
Aside: Am I the only one who thinks it's odd that there's almost no female input here?
Well, it's not precisely an easy question to answer at first blush. It certainly took me some time to consider. However, after reading through all the responses posted while I was off thinking about it, I have to say that you gents did a good job of covering the bases.

I cannot emphasize listening to your partner enough (this goes both ways, of course). Martian's Stop--Look--Listen thing is accurate and clever.
__________________
If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau
snowy is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 12:34 PM   #28 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
Willravel's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mixedmedia View Post
Know 'the lay of the land.' Single most important thing for a lover...especially a beginner. If you're not sure where the clit is, ask for help. We'll be happy to assist you.
I love the little man at the top of the boat!
Willravel is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 12:52 PM   #29 (permalink)
Une petite chou
 
noodle's Avatar
 
Location: With All Your Base
I've only had one.
But, I do consider him amazing.
Not at first, mind you.
It took getting to know each other, using what worked well once before, modifiying things another time, and really spending time exploring each others' body. The time aspect really matters. Taking it and giving it. I'm not the best for advice in this area, but since it was pointed out that there was minimal women's input, I thought I'd say a wee bit.
__________________
Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House

Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9
Just realize that you're armed with smart but heavily outnumbered.
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
noodle is offline  
Old 07-17-2010, 01:03 PM   #30 (permalink)
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
 
Daniel_'s Avatar
 
Location: Southern England
Quote:
Originally Posted by mixedmedia View Post
Know 'the lay of the land.' Single most important thing for a lover...especially a beginner. If you're not sure where the clit is, ask for help. We'll be happy to assist you.

And enthusiasm is good, but early in a relationship it's important to keep your wits about you during sex - stay aware. This is largely how you learn what your partner likes and doesn't like. Very important.

An open mind is also very helpful.
Can I just say, be careful how you follow the advice above. It got me into real trouble! I asked a policewoman, a nurse, and the grandmother who runs the office at my daughters school, and none of them were prepared to show me the location of their clit.
__________________
╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
Daniel_ is offline  
Old 07-18-2010, 01:27 AM   #31 (permalink)
Insane
 
raging moderate's Avatar
 
Location: Whatever house my keys can get me into
well, there you have it - you should have asked them one at a time
__________________

These are the good old days...




formerly Murp0434
raging moderate is offline  
Old 07-18-2010, 03:49 PM   #32 (permalink)
MSD
The sky calls to us ...
 
MSD's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: CT
Isn't it funny when people you haven't seen in years just reappear out of nowhere?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9 View Post
...but bare-chested is the preferred state of undress for subservience. 'Specially if you like 'maters with yer 'taters.
I can't emphasize enough what a bad idea it is to cook without a shirt and pants on. I have scars.
MSD is offline  
Old 07-18-2010, 05:36 PM   #33 (permalink)
Mine is an evil laugh
 
spindles's Avatar
 
Location: Sydney, Australia
Quote:
Originally Posted by LordEden View Post
I know I make my woman stand in the kitchen barefooted while she cooks me dinner.
I would if I didn't think it'd scare the children
__________________
who hid my keyboard's PANIC button?
spindles is offline  
Old 07-18-2010, 06:10 PM   #34 (permalink)
Paladin of the Palate
 
LordEden's Avatar
 
Location: Redneckville, NC
Quote:
Originally Posted by MSD View Post
I can't emphasize enough what a bad idea it is to cook without a shirt and pants on. I have scars.
If I'm in the kitchen, I'm not wearing a shirt. I cook all the time shirtless and have very few burns from that. Most of my burns are on my hands and from touching/bumping into hot oven walls.

I can fry bacon shirtless and not destroy my chest.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru View Post
In my own personal experience---this is just anecdotal, mind you---I have found that there is always room to be found between boobs.
Vice-President of the CinnamonGirl Fan Club - The Meat of the Zombiesquirrel and CinnamonGirl Sandwich
LordEden is offline  
Old 07-18-2010, 08:15 PM   #35 (permalink)
Young Crumudgeon
 
Martian's Avatar
 
Location: Canada
We don't all have a coat of man-fur to protect us, though.

Stop-look-listen is only half joking. Seriously, that's pretty much all you need to do. If you're not in a rush to spew your love-goo and actually pay attention to what makes your lady-friend scream profanity, you'll go far as a lover.

Interestingly enough, this advice has a number of applications. Surviving an argument with said lady-friend, not looking like an idiot at work, crossing the street intact. The list goes on.

I challenge you to find three more practical words.
__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame
Martian is offline  
Old 07-19-2010, 07:17 AM   #36 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
"Task, conditions, standard."

... sorry.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 07-21-2010, 06:29 PM   #37 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Location: Here
Somebody who does not lose his charge after the unplug.
lunxpress is offline  
 

Tags
amazing, ladies, partner, question

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 04:54 AM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360