11-28-2004, 04:42 PM | #121 (permalink) |
Tilted
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Never going to happen for me. I don't think I will be able to look myself in the mirror and live with myself the next day. I also have not had enough of going down on women yet to want to experiment on men. No giving, no receiving.
For those of you who will do it, someone once told me : "You do get twice the opportunities for sex on weekends" |
11-28-2004, 06:28 PM | #122 (permalink) | |
whosoever
Location: New England
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There's really very little about sex that makes a person bi, gay, or straight. It might confirm what you felt, or challenge you about your ideas of idenity. But it can't put ideas in your head, or feelings in your heart. I was once asked to "prove" that i'm bi, b/c i haven't had a major relationship with a man or fucked around. My answer is that i haven't done much of that with women, either...but i'm pretty damn sure i like them. A relationship (and the sex that may include) is something i do with someone else. Being bi, is something i do all by myself. And for the question? Most definitely.
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For God so loved creation, that God sent God's only Son that whosoever believed should not perish, but have everlasting life. -John 3:16 |
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12-08-2004, 04:12 PM | #128 (permalink) | |
Upright
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I didn't find it that hard to do, but it was really, no , EXTREMELY, weird |
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12-08-2004, 04:31 PM | #129 (permalink) |
Tilted
Location: Southeast Ohio
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I guess the whole idea of giving yourself a BJ is somewhat of an odd male fantasy that I've noticed many men I've spoken to about that subject said "yeah, I guess if I could I probably would"
As far as giving another man oral sex, the thought has crossed my mind but I would never do it. Last edited by RallyEX; 12-09-2004 at 04:29 PM.. |
12-08-2004, 05:33 PM | #131 (permalink) |
Addict
Location: In a State of Denial
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Yes, if I could give myself a bj, that would be great. That would removes all the hesitation. Unfortunelitely, I don't cloning for sex play is quite there yet.
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I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. -Frank Sinatra |
12-08-2004, 07:02 PM | #132 (permalink) | |
Twitterpated
Location: My own little world (also Canada)
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12-09-2004, 07:18 AM | #135 (permalink) | |
Crazy
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Its ok, just not all it’s cracked up to be. It's still your own nerves on your own nerves contact (although admittedly warm/wetter ) |
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12-09-2004, 07:42 AM | #136 (permalink) |
"I'm sorry. What was the question?"
Location: Paradise Regained
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I would rather have a stranger suck me off than do it to myself. I think that's a little weird.
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I have faith in a few things - divinity and grace But even when I'm on my knees I know the devil preys |
12-09-2004, 05:21 PM | #137 (permalink) | |
Crazy
Location: Bowling Green, KY
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I think people have the ability to reason this out, but after 12 years of schooling they want someone else that understands to spoon-feed them. I weep for the future.
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"Principle is okay up to a certain point, but principle doesn't do any good if you lose." Dick Cheney |
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12-11-2004, 07:02 AM | #140 (permalink) |
Addict
Location: Australia
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i would have to say that i have been interested in kissing men for a while now. when it comes to blow jobs i have always thought that if have a mmf 3some then i would fondle, maybe even suck... but no ejaculation.. thats where i draw the line.
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A stranger is just a friend you havent met yet. Impostor of the imposturous |
12-11-2004, 02:43 PM | #141 (permalink) | |
Mulletproof
Location: Some nucking fut house.
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Don't always trust the opinions of experts. |
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12-14-2004, 09:15 AM | #144 (permalink) |
Junkie
Location: X-posed
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Since when does doing something once make you anything? There is always so one that feels that they have to throw a label on everyone else, especially when they are compensating for their deficiencies and insecurities. As much as a drag off a joint does not make you a drug addict, sucking a cock doesn’t make you gay. The term revolves around sexual and emotional preference. It’s a life style choice. The short sighted view somehow how is never heard the other way; he’s not gay he fucked a woman once. Ever heard “man is curious by nature” and we all are curious about different things. Some are more socially acceptable than others, but that is a personal choice. Every thing you do has something to do with who you are. Those who point to a single event of personal significance in a lifetime that has no or little effect on society as a whole is wrong to condemn a person for straying from their personal beliefs. The bottom line is what do you want and does it affect those around me? Does a wife or girlfriend have an opinion? That’s your question.
Your answer lies in yourself and those closest to you that may know of your choice. Whatever you do be true to yourself, it’s all that matters. “Yourself” usually doesn’t mean just you either it involves those close to you. Your choice will tell you a lot about yourself but it won’t define what you are. It’s a sexual act not a life defining moment unless you make it that. My wife and I had a few threesome with my best friend and another with her best friend, it didn’t change who we were. We have kids and to everyone we are the typical family except to those we shared those moments with. Neither I or my wife is gay, we just tried something different and fulfilled a fantasy.
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Living on the west end dreaming of the theater playing in the Metropolis - Dream the Dream Live the Dream |
12-14-2004, 11:49 AM | #145 (permalink) |
Upright
Location: In the Wild Wild West
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I have to agree with Met on this subject. Wanting to suck another guy's cock is something you do or don't entertain, not a definition of who you are as a person (Unless you choose it to be).
I'm a married, (self-defined) heterosexual guy, but I can fully admit that I like looking at the cocks as much as the pussies and boobies when I watch porn. I fall in the "I've-fantasized-about-it-and-would-do-it-but-can't-imagine-a-scenario-in-my-life-where-it-would-come-up" camp. If it did, I doubt I would make it a habit. I'd just like to see what it was like--purely sexual, no attachment or extra emotion. I would definitely have to know and trust the guy--no strangers. |
12-14-2004, 02:36 PM | #146 (permalink) |
Banned
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One can make as much excuses as one pleases, but the simple fact is, if you decide to pleasure a member of the same sex orally, you are either gay or bi. If you feel the need to use excuses for yourself and not consider yourself gay or bi, fine, but don't try and say sucking another guys’ dick doesn't make you one or the other, because it does.
Judging by your philosophy, I could go in the street and shoot some random guy in the face and not be considered a murderer because I only did it once. |
12-14-2004, 03:15 PM | #147 (permalink) |
The Pusher
Location: Edinburgh
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It's come up and been mentioned a couple of times but unless my partner especially wanted me to then I wouldn't really have any desire to do it myself. It wouldn't do anything for me so I wouldn't do anything to instigate it.
(I think it's closer to food choice than violent crimes. If someone murders someone they are immediately a murderer, whether they liked it or never did it again. The act makes them a murderer forever. But if you're a vegetarian and you try meat once and decide you don't like it and never do it again then most people would agree you're still a vegetarian, perhaps not a very disciplined one. But what to call those 'vegetarians' who eat chicken and fish, and a steak every now and then? I don't know...) |
12-14-2004, 04:00 PM | #148 (permalink) | |
Upright
Location: In the Wild Wild West
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From my point of view, this is more apt: You have a friend who doesn't eat meat. He doesn't make a big deal about it, doesn't run around proclaiming himself a vegetarian, but appears to be one from every outside perspective. One day the two of you are at a Raiders game and he eats a chili dog because he wants to try one. The next day, he goes right back to his seemingly vegetarian diet. 1) How does this change anything about him as a person? 2) Why should you care what he eats? He's not making you eat it. 3) Does eating an occasional chili-dog change the fact that he prefers veggies? 4) Why are you so adamant about defining your friend based on what he is putting in his mouth? If you want to use your analogy, then go with this: Just because you kill someone doesn't mean you're a "murderer." Cops kill people, guys in the military kill people. Those guys are generally considered heroes. Ultimately, the definition is based on a lot more than someone's actions. //edit--my apology to the post directly beneath mine--I didn't see your analogy before I posted mine, but it seems we had the same idea. |
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12-14-2004, 07:07 PM | #149 (permalink) |
Banned
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I presented an absurd analogy purposely to prove my point. You can't say one analogy is appropriate whereas the other is absurd. If one is immediately considered a murderer for killing someone just once, one should also be considered gay or bi if they orally pleasure the same sex once.
Now if the case was the one you mentioned: 1) It changes the fact that he went against his own beliefs, therefore making him a fake. 2) I couldn't care less what he eats, but if he proclaims to be a vegetarian and tries a chili dog, he is not being true to himself. 3) It doesn't change the fact that he prefers veggies over meat, but it changes the fact that he calls himself a vegetarian when he is clearly not exclusive to veggies. 4) I would be defining what I see, but either way it wouldn't make a difference to me, but I call them like I see them. The people you mention that most consider "heroes" does not mean they are, if one followed society’s definition of “hero”, one can not think for themselves to begin with. I personally don't consider either of them "heroes", but that is for a whole other thread. What this argument comes down to are facts, and you can’t argue facts, but you can make excuses. Being subjective doesn’t change the fact that one committed a gay action. |
12-14-2004, 08:34 PM | #150 (permalink) |
Upright
Location: Little Rock
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I let people consider their own sexuality. Sorry to offend you, but if a straight male wants to have sex with another male, but still says he's straight - I'd be willing to give him a "straight award" or something.
I, like some others, am a male who has thought about giving oral to another male. I thought it would be gross, but then I tried it on my girlfriend's vibrator and it wasn't that bad. I would even consider doing it with one guy in particular, if it weren't for that whole commitment thing with someone else. |
12-15-2004, 10:43 AM | #151 (permalink) | ||
Upright
Location: In the Wild Wild West
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First of all, your murder analogy was absurd. Murder is a crime against humanity, outlawed in virtually every society. Giving a guy a blow job, while illegal in some places, is not even remotely on par with ending someone's life.
Second, if you read my analogy a bit more closely you'll see that I specifically stated that your Raider-loving friend did not consider himself a vegetarian, ergo, he could not be going against "his beliefs." Third, what is a gay action? Is there a reference manual passed out by "society" that I forgot to pick up? Is an action born gay or does it choose to be that way? Fourth, you're being duplicitous. On the one hand you present the "facts" of actions equalling reality while ridiculing my subjectivity: Quote:
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12-15-2004, 12:17 PM | #152 (permalink) |
Banned
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If we both choose to "self define" actions and/or words, than our entire argument is void. Obviously both you and I have different meanings of the same word, therefore we can continue this for four more pages and we will not get very far.
I never conclude my beliefs based on societies views, as you obviously do not either, therefore it all comes down to opinion, and in mine, one is gay if one has sexual relations with a member of the same gender, whether just once or on a regular basis. |
12-15-2004, 12:50 PM | #153 (permalink) | |||
Upright
Location: In the Wild Wild West
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I'm all for you agreeing with my point of view or for completely disagreeing with me and holding your own opinion that any guy that wants to suck a cock is really bi or gay (which was your original assertion). But don't by duplicitous and say we're both right when your own argument suggests you don't agree with me! I'm not trying to carry this on for four more pages and continue to deviate from the topic at hand, but, as you say in one of your posts, I'm calling it like I see it. |
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12-15-2004, 03:28 PM | #154 (permalink) |
Insane
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"bi" and "gay" are socially defined constructs that didn't even exist for most of history. If a guy feels like sucking cock today but doesn't next week has his sexuality changed? Or do the stereotypes make a lot of assumptions that may or may not be true?
I would stick with "he's straight if he thinks he is". |
12-15-2004, 04:36 PM | #155 (permalink) |
Banned
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Well, DaDictionaryBoy, those are my facts, so I'm not agreeing with you. My definition of gay just happens to fall in line with societies definition of gay, whereas, for example, my definition of hero differs greatly from that of societies.
I am still sticking to my original argument that sucking dick makes you bi/gay and I still don't agree with you on the subject of homosexuality, but I do agree with you that we may self define certain actions/words. So in conclusion, I'm right and you're wrong (how’s that for an argument ) |
12-15-2004, 05:05 PM | #156 (permalink) | |
Upright
Location: In the Wild Wild West
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And what exactly is "Societies" definition of gay that so jives with yours? This message board is definitely a microcosm of our "society." I would assert that at least half of the folks on this thread who have voiced an opinion about whether a guy blowing another guy one time makes him gay in perpetuity have agreed, in principle, with my point of view, not yours. Sure, lots of people have posted to say they wouldn't choose to do it--I've even said I can't imagine a scenario where it would happen for me. But that's not the same as you and "society" defining a person as this or that because they choose to try something. So yours is not really a very compelling argument. Perhaps it's worth a vote? |
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12-15-2004, 07:30 PM | #157 (permalink) |
Banned
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You just don't give up, do you? If you want to conduct a poll, be my guest, more people would be honest given the fact that a poll is anomyous.
As for my statement about it being facts, you are right, I'm sorry, I should've said my belief/opinion instead. And you say that more people in this thread agree with you, therefore your definition would be the one more in line with society, correct? So I am the only one self-defining? What were we arguing about again? EDIT: I typed more but felt it will degrade to flames.......I will leave my opinion as is and let this thread move back to topic......if you wan't to start a new one though, I would be the first to reply Although if you wish to continue this, please PM me so at least we wont hijack this thread any further. Last edited by Rdr4evr; 12-15-2004 at 08:37 PM.. |
12-17-2004, 12:00 PM | #158 (permalink) |
Upright
Location: In the Wild Wild West
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Nah, I'm good. My beef was with your use of "fact." I'm glad you are keeping your opinion and I look forward to more spirited discussion with you.
As a last word, from me on the subject of our debate: I reviewed writings by Masters & Johnson, Nancy Friday, Sheri Hite, and Alex Comfort--all folks who get paid to think about this very subject. And they can't agree on a definition amongst themselves. They range from Nancy Friday stating in Men in Love that (paraphrase) if straight men want to think or act in a homosexual way, who is she to say they are not straight; Alex Comfort stating that he believes all people are bisexual (to a greater or lesser degree), in The New Joy of Sex; Masters & Johnson stating in Heterosexuality that men and women are all a certain percentage heterosexual and a certain percentage homosexual--with truely bisexual folks being a 50/50 mix in sexual attraction and action. Hell, even Freud figured that, given the right circumstance, any of us would jump on anything we thought we could get it on with. Certainly not a definitive or exhaustive survey of the subject, but I thought it interesting. |
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blowjob, give, guys, straight |
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