the great insult thread - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Sion · 06-24-2007, 02:26 PM

post a great insult you heard/said.

OR

make up a great insult and post it.

mine:

heard in 9th or 10 grade in the computer room at school...said one chick to another: "You fat cuntpicker!"

just made this up: you (or this/that/he/she/whatever) suck(s) 9 kinds of ass.

Sharon · 06-24-2007, 02:50 PM

This thread is so shitty that it stinks worse than a soiled baby nappy left in the summer sunshine just outside your window in front of the fan you attempt to use for ventilation.

Push-Pull · 06-24-2007, 05:08 PM

Man, your brain must rattle around like a BB in a boxcar.....

Or, a variation of my signature,
You're just like a Slinky. Not good for much, but still fun to throw down a flight of stairs.

Luciian · 06-24-2007, 10:44 PM

Some of my favorite articulate insults...

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
Winston Churchill

"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others"
Samuel Jackson

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
Groucho Marx

"I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here."
Stephen Bishop

"He had delusions of adequacy."
Walter Kerr

From myself: Had a new kid working with me for about a week telling me all about the idiotic things he does while drunk and how he doesn't like to think and just do. So I told him he was the "Rebel without a thought". He had no idea what I talking about but the boss found it amusing.

Hanxter · 06-25-2007, 05:16 AM

you're an example of why some animals eat their young

you're a poster child for planned parenthood

you're the reason they invented condoms

your mom shouldn't have swallowed

beauty may be only skin-deep, but in your case, ugliness goes right to the bone

dog shit is easier to pick up than you are

Lady Sage · 06-25-2007, 05:40 AM

Id rather tie a pork chop around my neck and go play with a starving rabid pit bull.

Id rather sew my twat shut, gouge out my eye balls and slit my throat.

Id rather have sex with a telephone pole wrapped in barbed wire.

Of all the days for your mom NOT to have a headache.

The best part of you ran down your moms leg.

My personal favorite....

Youre nothing more than a simpletonistic fuckwit stagnant cum puddle whose mother should have had a migraine or otherwise found some way of preventing your scum bubble cum puss existance from being inflicted upon the human gene pool.

Imagine how angry I had to be for that to come tumbling out of my mouth like a freight train going down a mountain without brakes.

Pesto · 06-25-2007, 11:46 AM

Just think. Out of millions of sperm, that was the quickest.

Edit: I saw the Churchill quote up above and had to add this one

Lady Astor "Mr. Churchill, you're drunk!"
Winston Churchill: "Yes, and you, Madam, are ugly. But tomorrow, I shall be sober."

dirtyrascal7 · 06-25-2007, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Push-Pull

Man, your brain must rattle around like a BB in a boxcar.....

Or, a variation of my signature,
You're just like a Slinky. Not good for much, but still fun to throw down a flight of stairs.

Haha!

Actually... all of these are great. It's sad that I probably won't remember them at the appropriate time.

uncle phil · 06-26-2007, 11:14 AM

"so's yer ol' man!!!"

tinydancer · 06-30-2007, 06:28 AM

These ones come to mind..... I've actually heard the first two given out..

"You should've been nothing more than a regurgitated cum bubble"

" Basically, you're just the mutilated afterbirth of a lesbian gutter slut"

"I'd like to see things from your point of view but i can't seem to get my head that far up my ass"

And i found these ones..... and also found them pretty hilarious...

"Are your parents siblings??"

"I don't know what makes you so dumb...but it really works."

ItWasMe · 06-30-2007, 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pesto

Just think. Out of millions of sperm, that was the quickest.

.....................................

ItWasMe's two daughters fighting recently:

"You stupid son of a moron stick"

"You two headed moldy rabbit sucker"

"Bitch"

.....................................

On my daughter's shrit:

"I'm not mean. You're just a sissy."

Sion · 07-02-2007, 09:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ItWasMe

.....................................

ItWasMe's two daughters fighting recently:

"You stupid son of a moron stick"

so, she called you a moron stick?

ItWasMe · 08-08-2007, 09:14 PM

I'm going to have to ask her that.

uncle phil · 08-09-2007, 02:35 AM

"over a million sperm cells, and you're the one that survived..."

(sorry, pesto...i must have skipped right over yours...)

ItWasMe · 08-09-2007, 06:43 PM

"Teeeenagers!"...as said by my 7 year old, meant to be an insult.

analog · 08-09-2007, 08:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sion

you suck 9 kinds of ass.

I love it!

biznatch · 08-09-2007, 08:09 PM

This one works in the Denver area: "Thanks, but I ride the RTD bus, not the STD bus".

Tide · 08-10-2007, 04:14 AM

How's your wife and my kids?

Subtle.

Tophat665 · 08-15-2007, 08:12 PM

"When your IQ hits 50, sell. You will profit."

Overheard in my fraternity house after way too much beer, "That dumb cunt is a cum chugging fuck pig." Gotta love the assonance.

Groucho Marx, "Begone, and never darken my towels again!"

rat · 08-16-2007, 10:00 PM

"your existence is the equivalent of a celestial wetfart"

"you're the posterchild for abortions"

"every time you open your mouth, I wonder why your dad couldn't have had the decency to cum on your mother's face"

squeeeb · 08-17-2007, 03:15 AM

if you were a pokemon, you'd be suckachu

if you were a transformer, you'd be a retardocon

Sion · 08-17-2007, 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tophat665

Overheard in my fraternity house after way too much beer, "That dumb cunt is a cum chugging fuck pig." Gotta love the assonance.

http://jadedvideo.com/yz_result.asp?PRODUCT_ID=201036

http://jadedvideo.com/yz_result.asp?PRODUCT_ID=241483

uncle phil · 08-22-2007, 01:34 PM

you don't look as pregnant as you did two weeks ago...

Ourcrazymodern? · 08-23-2007, 03:43 PM

Y'all are just humans.

Sion · 08-25-2007, 04:29 PM

"You smell like an anchovie's cunt."

george carlin

Ourcrazymodern? · 08-26-2007, 11:22 AM

I heard you were so tight you squeak.

I'm not even sure this is an insult, but it got a powerfully negative reaction out of the person I said it to the other day...

Sion · 08-26-2007, 01:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ourcrazymodern?

I heard you were so tight you squeak.

I'm not even sure this is an insult, but it got a powerfully negative reaction out of the person I said it to the other day...

he/she is a tight ass?

Infinite_Loser · 08-27-2007, 02:42 AM

The greatest insult a man can give a woman: Call her fat.

The greatest insult a woman can give a man: Tell him he has a small penis.

uncle phil · 08-30-2007, 12:52 PM

there's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure...

Midnight · 08-30-2007, 04:14 PM

mmm one i thought was at least mildly insulting, but the person who was asking me to be on his inet radio show told me "Thats EXACTALLY why I want you on the show!"

'I'd rather be locked in a room with my Ex husband, 5000 angry killer bees and a blowing air raid siren while doing my taxes longform and having my teeth cleaned with a running chainsaw"

Lady Sage · 08-30-2007, 04:22 PM

Be that as it may, you STILL have to take a shower today.

Now, where did I put the garden hose?

Ourcrazymodern? · 08-30-2007, 06:24 PM

The god that created you must have been insane.

kramus · 08-30-2007, 08:20 PM

You're ugly, and your mother dresses you funny.

Ourcrazymodern? · 08-31-2007, 10:53 AM

So...what do you know?

uncle phil · 09-01-2007, 12:31 PM

i just learned of your illness...i hope it's nothing trivial...

Ourcrazymodern? · 09-04-2007, 01:28 PM

I might have felt something just then. No, before that!

Aw, hell, crawl off!

I'll be back...

uncle phil · 09-04-2007, 03:53 PM

thank you for sending me a copy of your book; i'll waste no time reading it...

Manic_Skafe · 09-04-2007, 04:40 PM

I probably heard it somewhere before but I used this one to end a high school argument with a very self-conscious girl:

"You think I'm an asshole? Look at what God did to your face"

Zooksport2 · 09-06-2007, 12:12 AM

Donated his brain to science before he was done using it

You set low personal standards and then consistently fail to achieve them.

uncle phil · 09-06-2007, 03:03 AM

you have van gogh's ear for music...

06-24-2007, 02:26 PM	#1 (permalink)
Sion Dumb all over...a little ugly on the side Location: In the room where the giant fire puffer works, and the torture never stops.	the great insult thread post a great insult you heard/said. OR make up a great insult and post it. mine: heard in 9th or 10 grade in the computer room at school...said one chick to another: "You fat cuntpicker!" just made this up: you (or this/that/he/she/whatever) suck(s) 9 kinds of ass. __________________ He's the best, of course, of all the worst. Some wrong been done, he done it first. -fz I jus' want ta thank you...falettinme...be mice elf...agin... Last edited by Sion; 06-24-2007 at 02:29 PM..

06-24-2007, 05:08 PM	#3 (permalink)
Push-Pull I'll ask when I'm ready.... Location: Firmly in the middle....	Man, your brain must rattle around like a BB in a boxcar..... Or, a variation of my signature, You're just like a Slinky. Not good for much, but still fun to throw down a flight of stairs. __________________ "No laws, no matter how rigidly enforced, can protect a person from their own stupidity." -Me- "Some people are like Slinkies..... They are not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs." -Unknown- DAMMIT! -Jack Bauer-

06-24-2007, 10:44 PM	#4 (permalink)
Luciian Upright Location: south florida	Some of my favorite articulate insults... "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." Winston Churchill "He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others" Samuel Jackson "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it. Groucho Marx "I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here." Stephen Bishop "He had delusions of adequacy." Walter Kerr From myself: Had a new kid working with me for about a week telling me all about the idiotic things he does while drunk and how he doesn't like to think and just do. So I told him he was the "Rebel without a thought". He had no idea what I talking about but the boss found it amusing. __________________ i am ninja "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind dont matter, and those who matter dont mind." -Dr Seuss

06-25-2007, 05:40 AM	#6 (permalink)
Lady Sage Mistress of Mayhem Location: Canton, Ohio	Id rather tie a pork chop around my neck and go play with a starving rabid pit bull. Id rather sew my twat shut, gouge out my eye balls and slit my throat. Id rather have sex with a telephone pole wrapped in barbed wire. Of all the days for your mom NOT to have a headache. The best part of you ran down your moms leg. My personal favorite.... Youre nothing more than a simpletonistic fuckwit stagnant cum puddle whose mother should have had a migraine or otherwise found some way of preventing your scum bubble cum puss existance from being inflicted upon the human gene pool. Imagine how angry I had to be for that to come tumbling out of my mouth like a freight train going down a mountain without brakes. __________________ If only closed minds came with closed mouths. Minds are like parachutes, they function best when open. It`s Easier to Change a Condom Than a Diaper Yes, the rumors are true... I actually AM a Witch.

06-25-2007, 11:46 AM	#7 (permalink)
Pesto Upright Location: Chicago	Just think. Out of millions of sperm, that was the quickest. Edit: I saw the Churchill quote up above and had to add this one Lady Astor "Mr. Churchill, you're drunk!" Winston Churchill: "Yes, and you, Madam, are ugly. But tomorrow, I shall be sober." Last edited by Pesto; 06-25-2007 at 11:49 AM..

06-24-2007, 02:50 PM	#2 (permalink)
Sharon Coy, sultry and... naughty! Location: Across the way	This thread is so shitty that it stinks worse than a soiled baby nappy left in the summer sunshine just outside your window in front of the fan you attempt to use for ventilation.

06-25-2007, 05:16 AM	#5 (permalink)
Hanxter The Griffin	you're an example of why some animals eat their young you're a poster child for planned parenthood you're the reason they invented condoms your mom shouldn't have swallowed beauty may be only skin-deep, but in your case, ugliness goes right to the bone dog shit is easier to pick up than you are

06-26-2007, 11:14 AM	#9 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	"so's yer ol' man!!!" __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

06-30-2007, 06:28 AM	#10 (permalink)
tinydancer Tilted Location: Ohio	These ones come to mind..... I've actually heard the first two given out.. "You should've been nothing more than a regurgitated cum bubble" " Basically, you're just the mutilated afterbirth of a lesbian gutter slut" "I'd like to see things from your point of view but i can't seem to get my head that far up my ass" And i found these ones..... and also found them pretty hilarious... "Are your parents siblings??" "I don't know what makes you so dumb...but it really works." __________________ My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure it out. What am i doing right? -Charles M. Schulz Last edited by tinydancer; 06-30-2007 at 04:15 PM..

08-08-2007, 09:14 PM	#13 (permalink)
ItWasMe But You'll Never Prove It. Location: under your bed	I'm going to have to ask her that. __________________ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "Ok, no more truth-or-dare until somebody returns my underwear" ~ George Lopez I bake cookies just so I can lick the bowl. ~ ItWasMe Last edited by ItWasMe; 08-08-2007 at 09:16 PM.. Reason: spellllling

08-09-2007, 02:35 AM	#14 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	"over a million sperm cells, and you're the one that survived..." (sorry, pesto...i must have skipped right over yours...) __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it. Last edited by uncle phil; 08-15-2007 at 12:23 PM..

08-09-2007, 06:43 PM	#15 (permalink)
ItWasMe But You'll Never Prove It. Location: under your bed	"Teeeenagers!"...as said by my 7 year old, meant to be an insult. __________________ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "Ok, no more truth-or-dare until somebody returns my underwear" ~ George Lopez I bake cookies just so I can lick the bowl. ~ ItWasMe

08-09-2007, 08:09 PM	#17 (permalink)
biznatch Junkie Location: France	This one works in the Denver area: "Thanks, but I ride the RTD bus, not the STD bus". __________________ Check it out: The Open Source/Freeware/Gratis Software Thread

08-10-2007, 04:14 AM	#18 (permalink)
Tide Upright Location: Glasgow	How's your wife and my kids? Subtle. __________________ I never dream. But when I do it's always the same one.

08-15-2007, 08:12 PM	#19 (permalink)
Tophat665 Minion of the scaléd ones Location: Northeast Jesusland	"When your IQ hits 50, sell. You will profit." Overheard in my fraternity house after way too much beer, "That dumb cunt is a cum chugging fuck pig." Gotta love the assonance. Groucho Marx, "Begone, and never darken my towels again!" __________________ Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

08-23-2007, 03:43 PM	#24 (permalink)
Ourcrazymodern? still, wondering. Location: South Minneapolis, somewhere near the gorgeous gorge	Y'all are just humans. __________________ BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

08-17-2007, 03:15 AM	#21 (permalink)
squeeeb part of the problem Location: hic et ubique	if you were a pokemon, you'd be suckachu if you were a transformer, you'd be a retardocon __________________ onward to mayhem!

08-22-2007, 01:34 PM	#23 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	you don't look as pregnant as you did two weeks ago... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

08-25-2007, 04:29 PM	#25 (permalink)
Sion Dumb all over...a little ugly on the side Location: In the room where the giant fire puffer works, and the torture never stops.	"You smell like an anchovie's cunt." george carlin __________________ He's the best, of course, of all the worst. Some wrong been done, he done it first. -fz I jus' want ta thank you...falettinme...be mice elf...agin...

08-26-2007, 11:22 AM	#26 (permalink)
Ourcrazymodern? still, wondering. Location: South Minneapolis, somewhere near the gorgeous gorge	I heard you were so tight you squeak. I'm not even sure this is an insult, but it got a powerfully negative reaction out of the person I said it to the other day... __________________ BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

08-27-2007, 02:42 AM	#28 (permalink)
Infinite_Loser Junkie Location: Lake Mary, FL	The greatest insult a man can give a woman: Call her fat. The greatest insult a woman can give a man: Tell him he has a small penis. __________________ I believe in equality; Everyone is equally inferior to me.

08-30-2007, 12:52 PM	#29 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	there's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

08-30-2007, 04:14 PM	#30 (permalink)
Midnight Banned Location: Chicago's western burbs	mmm one i thought was at least mildly insulting, but the person who was asking me to be on his inet radio show told me "Thats EXACTALLY why I want you on the show!" 'I'd rather be locked in a room with my Ex husband, 5000 angry killer bees and a blowing air raid siren while doing my taxes longform and having my teeth cleaned with a running chainsaw"

08-30-2007, 04:22 PM	#31 (permalink)
Lady Sage Mistress of Mayhem Location: Canton, Ohio	Be that as it may, you STILL have to take a shower today. Now, where did I put the garden hose? __________________ If only closed minds came with closed mouths. Minds are like parachutes, they function best when open. It`s Easier to Change a Condom Than a Diaper Yes, the rumors are true... I actually AM a Witch.

08-30-2007, 06:24 PM	#32 (permalink)
Ourcrazymodern? still, wondering. Location: South Minneapolis, somewhere near the gorgeous gorge	The god that created you must have been insane. __________________ BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

08-30-2007, 08:20 PM	#33 (permalink)
kramus loving the curves Location: my Lady's manor	You're ugly, and your mother dresses you funny. __________________ And now to disengage the clutch of the forebrain ... I'm going with this - if you like artwork visit http://markfineart.ca

08-31-2007, 10:53 AM	#34 (permalink)
Ourcrazymodern? still, wondering. Location: South Minneapolis, somewhere near the gorgeous gorge	So...what do you know? __________________ BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

09-01-2007, 12:31 PM	#35 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	i just learned of your illness...i hope it's nothing trivial... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

09-04-2007, 01:28 PM	#36 (permalink)
Ourcrazymodern? still, wondering. Location: South Minneapolis, somewhere near the gorgeous gorge	I might have felt something just then. No, before that! Aw, hell, crawl off! I'll be back... __________________ BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

09-04-2007, 03:53 PM	#37 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	thank you for sending me a copy of your book; i'll waste no time reading it... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

09-04-2007, 04:40 PM	#38 (permalink)
Manic_Skafe More Than You Expect Location: Queens	I probably heard it somewhere before but I used this one to end a high school argument with a very self-conscious girl: "You think I'm an asshole? Look at what God did to your face" __________________ "Porn is a zoo of exotic animals that becomes boring upon ownership." -Nersesian

09-06-2007, 12:12 AM	#39 (permalink)
Zooksport2 Casual... Real Casual Location: Orstraylia	Donated his brain to science before he was done using it You set low personal standards and then consistently fail to achieve them. __________________ "And you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking. Racing around to come up behind you again. The sun is the same in a relative way but your older, shorter of breath, and one day closer to death" ...pink floyd

09-06-2007, 03:03 AM	#40 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	you have van gogh's ear for music... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.