*Nikki*

I am interested to know how this pans out for all of you who are in relationships.

I am really only interested in hearing from those of you who have had THE SAME partner for more then six months.

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?

juanvaldes

3 years here.

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??
Slowed down some, not much but a bit. But that could very likely be due to school/stress/etc then being bored with each other.

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?
not quite sure what your after here....

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?
more.

*Nikki*

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?

*Meaning* Is the sex still as good as it was originally?

:::OshnSoul:::

Been with for almost 7 years, married for over 4

We have had our ups and downs. We still work on it- now we are at the point of *really* focusing on the other's desires and spicing things up.
When I had my son, my whole body changed- my hormones flew off the deep end and I even became depressed for a while. I still have troubles, because I don't have the sex drive like I used to, but I wish to work on my frame of mind and experiment with things that can arouse me easier. My mind is almost constantly in mom-mode, even if I am away from my son for a while.
But, like I said- it's all good. Sacrifice, communication, experimenting, and trying new things helps the sex life.

juanvaldes

Much much much x 1,000,000,000 times better. But we are each others first so take what you will.

Still growing, experamenting and young.

Ace_O_Spades

2.5 years here

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??

we've experimented with more new things, light bondage, role playing. New positions different nights

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?

Well it all depends on how often we can get together. She's moving into my apartment now, so even after this long we'll probably do it multiple times a night. Get back to me after a few months of living together

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?

same maybe even more. I love her with all my heart, time doesnt make me lose attraction to her

numist

1.5 years here.

We explore more, we try more things, and it only seems to get better.

About as often, sometimes more, sometimes less, but always satisfied, and its always good, we've only gotten better at pushing each others' buttons.

I think that the attraction has grown a bit, but the fondness has grown leaps and bounds.

There ya go, *Nikki*, hope that helps you out.

lonster

Admittingly i have only been in the current relationship for 5 months but we have already moved intogether.

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??
It has indeed got more intimate, learning more about each others turn ons and offs. Fantasies, roll playing.

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?
So far it hasnt effected it. Being in a past relationship for almost 5 years though we had our ups and downs. Not a consistant decline or incline

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?
I feel very much physically attracted, and more so mentally/eemotionally as time goes on

wilbjammin

I had an 8 month relationship that was all going through the motions.

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??
We tried different positions and different places... but it was all the same.

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?
I got to hating it so much that I'd pull out after she would orgasm sometimes and I would just roll over and sleep without me "getting there" at all.

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?
I consistently felt less and less attracted to her as time went on. It was all a clear sign that I needed out.


Once your relationship turns to sex, how that plays out is very important. It never felt right, and that was a clear sign that everything else wasn't going well either. So glad that's all over and I'm with a wonderful person now.

__________________
Innominate.

raeanna74

4 1/2 years married. Together 6 years

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??
It evolves with each of you singly and as a whole. If your not getting along in your marriage then the discord will reflect itself in your sex life.

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?
It isn't time so much as stress and circumstances. The phrase "familiarity breeds contempt" may have some bearing on the excitment factor but each of you are changing and growing and still constantly adjusting and learning the new you. When you get lazy things will get boring. There is a level of comfort that develops when you are in each other's arms. That kind of comfort can't be found anywhere else the more you are together.

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?
I would say personally it's the same LEVEL of attraction. The things that attract me aren't the same. The newness isn't as bright but the things we've learned sexually since marriage have made it more exciting in OTHER ways. It's like coming home after a long trip - You enjoyed the excitment of the trip (like the excitement of a new relationship) but you are so glad to be home and where things feel more safe. It's where you belong. You fit and you are needed.

Granted hubby and I have been swinging for a year now but we were with each other exclusively for 5 years before that.

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Ustwo

13 years together.

Gets more predictable but still good, some times every day of the week, some times once a week.

Is it as exciting as the first few times? Hell no, but its really better sex.

More

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absorbentishe

Well, for starters, I've been with my wife 14 years (has it really been that long? Married for 8.

We have 4 children, and that alone hinders our sex life more than anything, but we manage quite well. Our sex life has only gotten better the longer we've been together. Within the last 3 years, she has opened up a lot more to experiment and try/suggest things to do. We've been able to use games and toys, and books to heighten our sexual experience.

As for time and consistency, can't really answer that, mainly due to our children. We have spurts where sex is every night, every morning, and we can go several weeks without it (I can't, but deal with it in my way).

And even after 4 children, I am just as attracted to her as when we first met, if not more. During her pregnancies, I thought she looked even better, and couldn't keep my hands off her. A lot of guys don't feel this way, but I think a pregnant woman is so very attractive, and she fit that to a T.

I hope I answered your questions in a suitable way.

skysooner

Been 12 years now. Our sex life has just gotten better and better since we know each other so well now and communicate easily.

We are more consistent now as she gets more orgasms from me (through talking about how to please her more), so she is much more willing to do it at the drop of a hat.

I'm much more attracted to her now than I was then, because I know more about her and know she is even more beautiful than I could have imagined.

dami³

been together for a year and a month:

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??
It gets more ineresting, you go trough the process of getting to know someone better, less hassel, more fun: ie progress for both.

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?
Can't get enough of it - don't mean it in a sex crave way, just that when time passes, the intimicy of the "act" builds up, you can enjoy it more, bestow more meaning upon it and get more physically and emotionally involved in it. So apart from things like periods, you can consume it in full, with joy and because both of you really want to show your love, appreciation and commitment - of course having a relatioship also implies some life style changes, and in our case, we both have our own agenda which sometimes can interfere with our love life and thus the consistancy of sex.

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?
More attracted, it seems to be ever growing - I'm a very lucky man

Charlatan

We've been together for 16 and married for 11...

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??

It changes. When I met my wife we were still only 19. Needless to say we have grown older and (hopefully) wiser. As we have changed so has our approach to sex.

We talk about it a lot more (i.e. what we want or don't want). We experiment as much as always only now we have a large repertoire of things to do.

That said, we aren't getting any younger. I don't want to have sex everyday, all the time (well sometimes). The quality is better rather than quantity.


How does time effect the consistancy of sex?

Like I said above... I'd have to say it is better. I'd say there is more sex in the head than just physical sex... In other words, better all around sex.


Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?

Definately more attracted. This has a lot to do with the depth of my love for her than any physical changes.

ratbastid

Together 12 years, married 8.

It's a roller coaster. For a long time, sex got really stale and routine for us. And less frequent than either of us would have liked. It looked like "real life" was intruding on the passion we'd once had.

Then we saw that and interrupted that about a year ago, and since then (with a brief hiatus to mourn a dead loved one) it's been blue sky all the way, baby! Sex is better now than it's ever been. We're more experimental and inventive than we've ever been, and we're exploring all sorts of new things.

I assume when you say consistancy, you mean frequency? Again, it's what you make of it.

The natural pull of things is to have it become less and less of a priority. And in that way, it's not about the sex, the sex is just a symptom. The natural pull of things is to have the relationship itself become less and less a priority, for partners to take each other more and more for granted.

But it doesn't have to be that way.

Way way way way more.

And I was pretty damn attracted to her when I was 17 and she was 18.

WarWagon

Over 2 years together

We've been getting more adventurous when together, involving the use of toys and such, and we are very affectionate and involved when we do have sex. However, we are at different schools 11 hours apart, and going to a very large campus, I've found myself very attracted to some other women on more than a physical basis, making things very difficult. But when we are together, I'm more attracted to her than I ever was.

Derwood

My wife and I are struggle with this all the time. For some reason, we can't communicate when it comes to sex. When we have sex, it's usually pretty great, it's just a matter of initiating it. Despite being attracted to each other, despite having good results when we have sex, there is some weird barrier when it comes to actually initiating it. Maybe because we're BOTH passive people sexually. We want the other person to be the assertive one.

Well the long and the short of it is that my wife and I probably have sex less frequently than other married couples our age (late 20's). It's a source of tension right now, and I've actually considered marriage counseling to help us out.

But based on other people's responses here, our situation seems to be the minority. That, or I'm the first one brave enough to admit it....

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onodrim

Secret and I have been together for 4 years now, and our sexual relationship just keeps getting better! However, I think a lot of that comes from the fact that we are both still quite young and always learning more. There are definently times when either one or both of us is not in the mood, and we'll cool it for a while. In terms of attraction, I wouldn't say that I'm either more or less attracted to Secret, but its very different. When we first started dating, it was more of an excited kind of attraction. Over time its grown into a much deeper more emotional kind of attraction.

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"The world is so exquisite with so much love and moral depth, that there is no reason to deceive ourselves with pretty stories for which there’s little good evidence. Far better it seems to me, in our vulnerability, is to look death in the eye and to be grateful every day for the brief but magnificent opportunity that life provides"
-Carl Sagan

analog

I was with my (now-ex) girlfriend for about three and a half years.

We were long-distance for all but about the last 6 months of it.

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??

Sex became more sensual, closer, but at the same time much more animalistic. Keeping in mind that I had limited sex experience (1 partner before her) and she was a virgin when we first had sex. It was a bit of a learning experience, set many months apart by the occasional trip (she lived 1200 miles from me).

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?

Once she moved here, and into my place, we had then been together for 3 years. We fucked like rabbits, at least 1-2 times a day, every day we were together... from the day she moved in, to the day we split. We were always reinventing ourselves and our passion, and ALWAYS had a ton of fun. Sex had nothing to do with the split.

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did? [/B][/QUOTE]

I always found her to be the most beautiful girl there was, and that never changed the entire time we were together. It's been a year now since we've split, and I still mentally yardstick her against all other girls... I loved her very, very much... and always will.

Kadath

6.5 years.

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??

It goes up and down. It has never returned to the heyday of when we were first dating. Sometimes we'll go a month without sex, sometimes we'll have sex several times in a week.

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?

"Affect." It's better than it first was, since we know each other better, and we try new things, which is fun.

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?

More. Or the same. Certainly not less.

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3rdEye

---along the lines of the answers above. We just broke up 3 weeks ago...ever since the kissing incident it has been dry and that was almost two years ago. She never fully trusted me after that and it pretty much ruined our relationship. At first the sex was usual..hot and heavy and then she gradually didn't want it as much. I would get so frustrated!! So it got to the point where I lost interest in sex with her and when she would try to get close I would be like get away.

LStanley

I still enjoyed it after 6 months... it started to lose some of its.. "Romance" but it was stilla show of love to her...

She started to think of it as more of a job and expected more in return and more elaborate forms of sex..

I dunno.... I guess it loses its "honeymoon" effect after about 5-6 months or so

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Lathan Stanley

G_Whiz

After 37 1/2 years, I guess I'm giving you the long range perspective.

Here goes:

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??

We've gone through several cycles. It isn't as frequent as it was in the first year or two, but then are times when it seems like it's back to that level. Some of the things that impacted it included kids, hormonal changes and life in general.

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?

Actually, it's better than in the beginning because we've learned how to please each other and we take more time. It's less about the act and more about the enjoyment. Also, we are still willing to experiment, so it's still fresh.

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?

I really don't know how to answer this and be clear. When we were first together a lot of the attraction was physical. Now, it is more sensual. I still love how she looks, but what attracts me is how she reacts to my attention.

The best way I can sum it up is that it has all changed as we have changed. Our relationship is just as intense, but for different reasons than when we were first starting out.

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StephenSa

I've been with my partner over a year. We are now engaged and live together. When we first started having sex (a little over a month into our relationship) she pursued me all the time. Jesus! I had a bit of trouble keeping up. Multiple times at night, multiple in the morning, then more mid afternoon. It was great but honestly sometimes I would run out of steam. As time has gone on, the frequency has dropped off considerably. Now I do most of the pursuing. I think part of it is that now that we live together the sence of urgency isn't there. Before, we just had weekends and the occasional weekday visit. Now that we are always available to each other I guess there is no need to "get it while you can and get a lot of it!" On the up side we still have sex averaging three times a week and now that we know each other better and are more comfortable together we experiment more and the sex has gotten more interesting, kinky, wilder, hotter, more adventurous all round.
As for beeing attracted to my partner, I wasn't nearly as physically attracted to my partner at first as I am now. Now I can add my attraction to her emotionally to the physical and that adds up to a big wallop! Things have definately gotten better from an already great start.

digme

I've been with my Girlfriend for almost 2 years now. We've been living together for about a year and a half.

We've been having a really tough time with our sex life. Almost a year ago, things really just dropped off. When we first started dating, we were getting it on every day and sometimes twice a day. Now its somewhere between every 3 or 4 weeks.

I really miss that intense connection, that wild lustful sex. I liked the feeling that she wanted (more like NEEDED) to get me into bed and explore with me. Now it all seems so routine... more like an obligation that anything.

I feel like I'm stuck in the stereotypical relationship that people always joke about.

ariekitten

if you are a creative, innovative couple who really enjoys sex with one another.....time doesn't have much effect on your sex life. yeah, after more than a few months it does start to dwindle, but there are things you can do to upkeep it, and definitely if you are both in the mood and still hot for each other, there shouldn't be a lack in quantity of sex. haha....just my opinion

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crony

What happens to your sex life as time goes on??
Sex only happens 2 - 3 times a week. We were like rabbits when we first met

How does time effect the consistancy of sex?
The sex is still great and I still love pleasing her.

Do you feel more/less attracted to your partner then you initially did?
I'd have to say more so.

CinnamonGirl

We've been married for almost 3 years, together for about 5.... the quality of sex has gone WAY up. We were each others' firsts, and while sex was always exciting when we first started, it took a while for me to get comfortable enough with my body to REALLY enjoy it.

All but 4 months of our dating relationship was long distance, and I always thought we adjusted to that differently...I got used to sex every time we were together, he got used to having sex once a month

We hit a bit of a drought, which I was MAJORLY unhappy about, but we've since talked about it, so things are getting better. Woo!

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smithja0423

~2 years here. When we first started dating, we were seriously having sex like twice a day. Neither of us had consistent sex for quite a while before that. Things settled down into a 4-5 times/week routine for a while. Then we moved in together. After a dramatic increase, it pretty much stopped. We've recovered to a point where we usually have sex at least once a weekend, sometimes twice. Try to get any more than that, you're getting shot down. When we do have sex, it's pretty hot, and the emotional connection is there, but we just dont' seem all that interested in it unless we've got NOTHING else to do.

Sometimes it's no fun.

PDOUBLEOP

kids, work, mortgages, ex's...these things are more destructive than a cold shower.

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