dualman7

For the last couple of years I have lacked self confidence, I have had fear over come me in key spots. I've had trouble doing things which were once very easy for me. Recently, I have realzied that I do know what's right and what's wrong. That I do know that I should never let fear overcome me. That I do know that I am very talented. But when push comes to shove, it's almost like I get ignored, and my body has a mind of its own. I have trouble controlling thoughts. I often get stuck thinking about things which drive me crazy, even though I try as hard as I can not to think about it. I used to feel like I lacked proper information, and that's why I lacked in some of these areas. But I know what should be done, I know how it should be done, neverthe less I lose complete control, and my mind basically runs the show and does the opposite of what I know is right. The worst part is, I feel powerless.

lurkette

You might want to look into some antianxiety medication, or at the very least some therapy if you're not into meds. I experienced much the same things a few years ago - uncontrollable thoughts, feeling like my brain was "stuck" thinking about unpleasant, unproductive things.

You do have control over your mind, it's just going to take some "exercise" to get reliable at it. Think of it this way: you have some mental habits that have been built up over time. These mental habits have worn "paths" in your neural circuitry. When you're stressed in some way, your thoughts take the path of least resistance: anxiety, negative thoughts, things you know are not best for you. But before you can really do anything about it, your brain has already gone in a particular, familiar direction. It's going to take some practice to wear a new pathway for those thoughts to take.

I would start with a good therapist who can recommend some exercises and perhaps some medication to help get you through the transition period when you're "rewiring" your brain.

Best of luck!

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"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."

- Anatole France

primal

dualman7, Is this a serious post? I really don't understand what you're talking about. Can you give us an example of the kinds of thoughts you have? Maybe you can tell us a story that demonstrates what you are talking about.

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dualman7

I thought we all had this, but I guess I was wrong. Here's an example. I play for my schools baseball team. For some reason, I am horrified of fly balls. Luckily for me, we are short in outfielders so I have to play outfield. I practice, i watch videos, I learn techniques. As soon as I hit the field, it's like I lose the power over my mind, and I am scared to death again. I've read a bunch of self help books and I know that it's suicide to keep thinking negative thoughts about yourself, but no matter how ahrd I try, I can't move on from whatever negative thought my mind wants to play over and over. This is just an example, as it happens in a much wider range. I don't feel like I have any control over myself mentally. Fear plays a huge role in my life, and no matter what I read, or actions I take, I can't make myself overcome it. At first I thought maybe it was a lack of self esteem/confidence. But I am pretty damn confident in myself. But the "other" mental part of me doesn't seem to have any confidence in me. I get intimdated so easily, even if i don't show it.

I was shopping at a grocery store a couple days ago, I stepped away from my cart to go get some frozen food, and as I am coming back, i see this dude taking stuff from my cart, and putting it in his. Without even a second thought, i approached him, asked him what the hell he was doing, and got him to put all my stuff back. 3 mins later my "other" side starts playing these negative images like I pissed the guy off, and he's going to slash my tires and etc. Just stupid stuff that doesn't belong nor make sense. No matter how hard I try, I can't stop these ridiculous negative thoughts. I hope this makes more sense and I could gt some input from you guys.

:::OshnSoul:::

i think the best to do is to acknowledge your feelings- not about what your mind is thinking, but the feelings behind those thoughts. Observe them and draw a conclusion as to the feelings and why you feel the way you do and what you feel can be done about it. Feelings always tell all, but how you think and react to those feelings are the key to where you are going in life. Act from the feelings, not from the thoughts themselves. It's the best way to move ahead, break boundaries, and to realize more about yourself.

lurkette

You might try some mindfulness meditation - get used to seeing your thoughts as outside yourself, acknowledge them rather than resisting them, and move on.

I still think you might want to see a therapist, though - what you describe sounds an awful lot like a mild anxiety disorder.

__________________
"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."

- Anatole France

Esco

I'd agree with some of the suggestions. You might want to look into some medication. I'm sure you will see a huge improvement.

First step, set up an appointment and tell the Dr. exactly what you mentioned here.

Best of luck.

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powerclown

Saddam? That you?

MerKon4

First I must say that I hate the idea behind medication, although I'm not saying don't try it. I think you will be better off with some mental excersise.
I have had many of the same problems you have described. Mine was more along the social lines. I hated interaction in groups and often feared them. If I was to approach someone, as you did in the store, I would have the same after thoughts.
Six weeks ago, my then girlfriend destroyed our 3 year relationship and started sleeping with other guys and told me I was every nasty thing in the book. It was a complete sledge hammer to me and I was considering taking my life over it. After about 2 weeks, something in me changed. I just took a look at the world that I had previously wanted to leave and decided that trying everything wouldn't be as bad as death would have. With out any thought, I step into a crowd of my friends and speak. I went and played paintball a few days ago, and I'm usually the farthest guy back on the field, but now I rush to the front. Someone tried short change me on a job, and without hesitation I got in his face and didn't have any fear about it. I have to say that it has been a wonderfull eye opener. My friends call me a lot now, trying to find out what I'm up to or if I would like to come with them. I'm out doing everything I want.
The basics of what I'm trying to say is simply acknowledge your fears or worries and exploit them. Get out in that field and catch the ball. Whats worse, the possibility of being hit by a ball (you'll heal) or catching it for you team and fans? Even if you got hit by that ball, you still tried, everyone knows that and they will want to help you.

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yes