Tex

I tried searching for this in the archives but I couldnt find anything...

Anyway, it's now 2 months into my relationship with my g/f. She's ready to have sex, and to an extent, so am I, but I want us to get a check up before we do. I'm just wondering what the best way to do it is? I'm really struggling with this so any help is appreciated. Thanks.

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"All I know is that I know nothing..."

Gatorade Frost

It seems like you could honestly say for your own mutual protection you feel it's in both of your best interests to be checked by a doctor for STDs or any potential problems that could rear its ugly head in your relationship.

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I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."
Emo Philips

abaya

I think it's common sense in this day and age to get mutual tests (unless you know FOR SURE that one or both of you have never contacted another human being via their nether regions before). I certainly wouldn't find it insulting... in fact, I'd respect it a lot if that question came up (esp. after 2 months together!) from the guy. And if someone DIDN'T want to get a test before sex and show me the results, there's no way in hell I'd sleep with them, not even for a one-night stand or whatever. So bring it up as sincerely as possible, and make it obvious that BOTH of you should be tested, and I can't imagine her reacting badly (unless she's a little odd).

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And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

Suave

How about "Let's go out to a nice picnic." Then you drive her to the clinic and say "SURPRISE! We're getting tested for STDs!"

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"Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions." - Albert Einstein

"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something." - Plato

Gatorade Frost

I can see that you live up to your name, Suave.

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I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."
Emo Philips

aberkok

Just ask. It's a societal norm these days (as long as we're talking about a society based on facts and science... oh shit ).

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!check out my new blog! http://arkanamusic.wordpress.com

Warden Gentiles: "It? Perfectly innocent. But I can see how, if our roles were reversed, I might have you beaten with a pillowcase full of batteries."

martinguerre

the best way? the way that actually makes it happen.

i think the most important thing to do in talking about this is the why. for me, it's about caring about our health, and not wanting unneeded anxiety in the relationship, so that we can really enjoy ourselves.

so clear the voice and let her know. best of luck.

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For God so loved creation, that God sent God's only Son that whosoever believed should not perish, but have everlasting life.

-John 3:16

snowy

Every woman should have a pelvic exam if they're sexually active anyways, and before engaging in intercourse it's important to decide on family planning options. Getting tested for STDs is equally important, so make sure you do all three. How to get her to do it? Talk to her about it. Easy as that.

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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Charlatan

Wow... I feel old. Sex is so much more complicated these days.

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"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

BigBen

How about this one?

You: "You know, we have been going out for a couple of months now, and I think you are really great..."

Her: "Aw, that is soooo sweet!"

You: "Yeah, anyway, I was hoping that we could take our relationship to the next level."

Her: (with knowing look in her eye) "I was thinking the same thing."

You: "Well, I think you need to get ckecked out. You look like a nice clean girl, but in my experience looks can be decieving. I really want to bang you, but if I am going to do this properly, I need a bill of health. Dad always said 'Careful of the ladies son, they'll screw you over' and I always took that to heart, sexually I mean. So how about you make an appointment and get the tests back to me in writing ASAP. You are hot, but so was that girl I did in Amsterdam in '94 and I'm still paying for that one...."

Her: (Silence, with look of horror)

You have any other ideas?

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3.141592654
Hey, if you are impressed with my memorizing pi to 10 digits, you should see the size of my penis.

ruggerp11

"I notice you've been itching your 'area' a lot lately...I was wondering if you would maybe get that checked out before we do the dirty"

Be subtle:
*COUGH*"go get tested*COUGH*

Or not:
"hey! I like to check the quality of the turf before I step on the field, I think you need to go get probed"

"whats that smell...O um maybe get that looked at?"

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Patriotism means being loyal to your country all the time and to its government when it deserves it.
--Mark Twain
Do What makes you happy
--Me
BUT!
"Happiness is the absence of the striving for happiness" - Chuang-Tzu

Suave

I do my best.

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"Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions." - Albert Einstein

"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something." - Plato

analog

"The reality is this... you've had sex with some people, and I've had sex with some people. I'm sure that also holds true for all those people as well. Bottom line is, I care alot about us, and I want to make sure whenever it is we become physical, we can do it without having to think about the past- only the future. So, I think it's a good idea for us both to go get checked out, just to be sure we're ok."

Something like that if you're the romantic type, or if you have more of a romantic relationship. If she'd not all about the honey and roses and sugary romance cards, then deliver it straight-out.

"I've had sex with people, you've had sex with people. Regardless of the our pasts, you're a great chick and i want us to have a good future, so let's get tested to be sure everything's cool. There's really no reason not to, it's the smart thing to do."

maleficent

Analog says it best... Just be straigtforward and honest about it.. It's for her protection as well as yours.

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