03-06-2004, 06:14 PM | #1 (permalink) |
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What are your sex 'morals'?
and where did you get them?
I'm at the age, and live in the age where sex has become almost common place, and you hear / see / talk about it nearly everyday. I'm the kind of person who accepts no religious morals as my own, I only form them through my own logic, solidified by observation and debate. Because of this, there are many things that I'm confused on, things that i havent formed by morals on yet. Sex has become the hardest one, and I've found myself trying to get out of sexual situations because i dont want to get into something that i havent thought over yet. So i'm asking you, to help me out here, what are your morals and beliefs on sex? Whats immoral, and what makes those activities immoral? Most importantly, how have you formed those morals? |
03-06-2004, 06:25 PM | #2 (permalink) |
Hiya Puddin'! Miss me?
Location: Silicon Valley, CA
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That's such a vague and open question, I couldn't possibly answer it.
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03-06-2004, 06:38 PM | #4 (permalink) |
Crazy
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I grew up never talking about sex, just knowing that it was out there, so I never really acquired any sense of real moral bounds for it other than ignorence. Now, I don't think my life morals apply to the act actual act of sex, just possibly the people I get into relationships with. Sex in itself depends on how things feel to me physically and how I feel about them emotionally, not the normal morals I acquired from religion and my family when I was growing up. In a way, I can make up my own rules as I go along by determining what I am comfortable with.
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03-06-2004, 07:06 PM | #5 (permalink) | |
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Just pick something you dont mind sharing, I'm just looking for different opinions on sex, however vague they may be |
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03-06-2004, 07:10 PM | #6 (permalink) |
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Location: Amish-land, PA
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I answer anything, say anthing on my mind, and have no moralistic beliefs whatsoever. Morals are for pussies.
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"I've made only one mistake in my life. But I made it over and over and over. That was saying 'yes' when I meant 'no'. Forgive me." |
03-06-2004, 07:38 PM | #8 (permalink) | ||
Crazy
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03-06-2004, 09:36 PM | #9 (permalink) |
lascivious
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Re: What are your sex 'morals'?
I try to live by this very basic and ancient saying:
Do on to others what you would wish them to do on to you. That pretty much sums it all up for me. Works great in any kind of relationship – family, friends, lovers, strangers. |
03-06-2004, 09:38 PM | #10 (permalink) |
The sky calls to us ...
Super Moderator
Location: CT
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As long as both people are OK with what happens, it's OK. I wouldn't touch anyone I didn' tknow and trust without protection.
In a relationship, unless the other person gives permission, going outside of the relationship is not OK. So, I guess my view is that it has to be consensual, and don't screw around behind someone else's back. It's that simple. |
03-06-2004, 09:52 PM | #11 (permalink) |
bAck iN aCtiOn!
Location: in my imagination
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i grew up in a home that didn't talk about sex, didn't approve of sex, very religious....i've had to make up my own mind about it over the years.....i've formed my own morals...
anything i feel comfortable with doing, i will try...if i don't feel comfy with it, definitely not. i will do almost anything with someone i'm really into or someone i love. i think sex is an expression of how you feel for someone, so why not show it? but hopefully you don't feel that way for everyone. haha. well i'll shut up now.
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03-06-2004, 10:54 PM | #12 (permalink) |
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Location: The one state that doesn't have black outs: TEXAS BABY!!!
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Morals are for those that are willing to take the sling and arrows that life while throw at you. Its hard man, and it really sucks. On my part what I really want is a relationship where I don't have to worry about being on my best behavior nor trying to figure out what the other person wants. I don't like the idea of casual sex because for me it sounds so disrespectful to both of the people involved, on the other hand I have been dumped two times in the last three months for taking what we do in bed way to seriosuly. I'd like to think that the after sex cuddingling has more to do with just liking the position you can fall asleep in.
In the end it really comes down to what you want to accept. Do yo mind sex with the idea of no more attachment beyond a period of 24 hours? I may miss her...but in the end I mean....thre days is the usual waiting period right? |
03-07-2004, 01:15 AM | #13 (permalink) |
The Pusher
Location: Edinburgh
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I've been accused of taking sex too seriously and also of being too horny, I guess I'm still trying to find a balance.
By sex morals, do you (in some way) mean sexual things that I would never do, or where I draw the line, or some such thing? If that's what you mean, I guess I'd answer that if I find the right person then I think I can honestly say that I'd try *almost anything once. I say almost because I don't like the idea of anybody I know (friends, etc.) seeing my partner naked, and I don't like the idea of another man penetrating my partner. So basically if it involves just the two of us, apart from the two things mentioned above I think I'd try anything. I don't see anything wrong with casual sex. That's not to say I can't see anything special about sex, or the emotional attachments, but I can also see that sex can be great on an emotional level even if your partner's terrible in bed, and that sex can be fantastic on a physical level, even if the emotional attachment isn't there. If everybody is consenting fully then I see nothing wrong with any sexual practices, the obvious aside (pedophilia, etc.). |
03-07-2004, 03:45 AM | #15 (permalink) |
follower of the child's crusade?
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sex sometimes makes me feel embarassed and confused, sexuality is not an important part of my life, anything I consider "kinky" makes me feel guilty and strange - I consider any sexual act that is harmful, demeaning, non consenual, painful or fetished to be to some degree against my personal morality. I talk about people that I would or wouldnt like to sleep with, but talking seriously about sex makes (in real life) makes me uncomfortable, I consider some of my sexual fantasies to be abnormal and immoral (most of them are hero fantasies, where I rescue girls from various types of danger, and probably get hurt in the process). In relationships, I am very protective, I tend to be attracted to people who seem vulnerable and might need my protection - sometimes I feel almost like I have to compete though, to try and feel as unhappy as my SO other does, I have an abnormal desire to do violence to the perpetrators of sexual crimes, if I see a girl and a guy arguing in a street, a part of me wants to go and beat the guy, I would feel very uncomfortable in approaching someone or being in a situation that was just casual sex, but to be realisrtic if I found myself in that situation I'd probably do it.
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03-07-2004, 02:42 PM | #16 (permalink) | |
Crazy
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I dont want to get married because we had sex, we had sex because I know I want to get married to her |
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03-07-2004, 03:03 PM | #17 (permalink) |
TFP Mad Scientist
Location: Philadelphia, PA
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I derive my sex morals from a variety of sources including religious beliefs, family upbringing, my own thoughts on the subject, and personal experience.
I strongly believe in monogamy, so I'll never cheat on my girlfriend and I go to great lengths to avoid situations where I may be tempted to cheat on her. Along the same lines, I won't go after a woman who's already in a relationship, and I definitely will not try to get involved with a woman if she's married. Also, I believe that sex is something sacred that should be kept between two people, so I won't do threesomes, foursomes, or any other activities that include more than one partner. Finally, one moral imperative I go by is that when she says "no" it is "no." I don't believe in forcing myself upon someone to satisfy my sexual urges, and I won't force or guilt-trip a woman into doing something she's not willing to do.
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03-07-2004, 03:35 PM | #19 (permalink) |
Here
Location: Denver City Denver
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My parents got a divorce when I was 12.
That's fucked me in "relationship/sex-land" It's a crappy response but elian gonsalez never edited his question to make it more answerable.
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03-07-2004, 07:07 PM | #20 (permalink) | |
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ya, sorry if its too general, but that shows you about how much i'm unsure about. |
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03-07-2004, 08:38 PM | #21 (permalink) | |
Friend
Location: New Mexico
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03-08-2004, 02:03 PM | #22 (permalink) |
Addict
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Sex is a beautifull thing under the right circumstances. Other wise it is a horrible experience. The right circumstances is for each individual to decide but ideally it is when both (or every one in the experience) partners define the right circumstances exactly the same.
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03-08-2004, 06:27 PM | #24 (permalink) |
Addict
Location: Texas
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mutual, voluntary, consensual.
(truely voluntary and consensual requires conscious, unimpared adult) There's certainly things I won't do, but as far as my judgement of things in general is concerned, it's pretty much do as you will without initiating force against any other.
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Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana. |
03-09-2004, 05:16 PM | #25 (permalink) |
Psycho
Location: London, England
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I'm a no sex before marriage guy.. and believe me it is hard as anything to keep upto! I' ve always gone with bottoms on.. and so far so good.. . geez it's hard! haha But to each their own, i'm not one to say do this or do that to others!
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03-09-2004, 07:37 PM | #26 (permalink) |
Crazy
Location: Long Island, NY
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I believe that when you find that special someone and you fall deeply in love... and you know that you want to be with that person forever... then the time is right to have sex.
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03-14-2004, 06:18 AM | #29 (permalink) |
Psycho
Location: i live in the state of denial
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sex morals: 1. don't mess around with friends significant others/ex so's
2. don't mess around with good friends 3. statutory rape IS a crime 4. if she says "don't do that", DON'T DO THAT other than that, anything goes |
03-14-2004, 03:03 PM | #30 (permalink) |
Addict
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I won't do anying involving actually shitting. Although, I have boned my girlfriend in the ass a couple times and shitty substance has come out, but it wasn't that bad. I won't do anything involving animals or the same sex, but other than that i think i'd do anything, and I mean anything, except some sick vomitting or pedophilia or necrophilia. I think as long as everything is consensual nothing is wrong or immoral, except necrophilia and pedophilia.
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03-15-2004, 10:15 AM | #32 (permalink) |
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Location: Virginia
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Well besides activities like necrophilia,besitiality,pedophilia,and rape which i'm pretty sure the majority of people here agree is "out of bounds", I guess I'm pretty open. I'd be open to a one night stand threesome but maybe hesitant if it was with a long standing girlfriend and another party(i'd probably be hesitant about a MMF threesome too but might give it a try if given the chance). I'd try anal sex (both giving and receiving). I could get into that bondage stuff but not attracted to blood letting pain aspect just the "props". Again I'd prefer monogomy at this time but might be open to something if it was a one time deal and my girlfriend consented to it(no affairs).I'd be willing to do alot of stuff for my lover(to a point) even though I might not like it(if she was into golden showers I do that for her even though I think it's kind of gross) but some stuff like furries and scat would weird me out and might make me think twice about the relationship. It's just kind of hard to tell at this point since unfortunately I'm just not that experienced at this time in my life.Oh yeah and if it's not obvious I'm up for sex before marriage for the simple thing that I don't want to risk being with an incompatable lover the rest of my life,at 19 this seems like a big deal but I'm guessing it will not be as big of an issue as time goes on, still in my current hormone run state sex seems like really important part.
Last edited by mattevil; 03-15-2004 at 10:19 AM.. |
03-15-2004, 10:31 AM | #33 (permalink) |
Banned
Location: We Have Just Lost Cabin Pressure
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Between two consenting adults morals in the bed are vague for me, in general I do have some standards
I don't believe in threesomes, people always have to do everything in excess. I think threesomes are demeaning and make sex more recreational than anything and threesomes takes away that special feeling you get from being the center of someone's attention. Cheating is for losers and those people should have to wear an A on their foreheads, alot of murders, suicides and heart ache would be prevented if people would just do the right thing. People who go to stripclubs are losers with too much money to waste and promote the idea that a woman is no more than just a body to look at. Porn is for people with no imagination and too much free time. Thank you and goodnight |
03-15-2004, 10:35 AM | #34 (permalink) | |
Banned
Location: We Have Just Lost Cabin Pressure
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Why would it fuck you up? Did you watch them have sex or something? The fact that it bothers kids when their parents divorce has always been a mystery to me, you weren't part of their intimate relationship, so don't worry about it. My parents were already divorced before I was born for christsakes, I attribute any questionable attitudes I have about sex/relationships to my own perceptions of things. |
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03-15-2004, 06:19 PM | #35 (permalink) | ||
Hiya Puddin'! Miss me?
Location: Silicon Valley, CA
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Human Sexuality In A World of Diversity Quote:
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=^-^= motdakasha =^-^= Just Google It. BA Psychology & Photography (I'm not going psychoanalyze you nor will I let you cry on my shoulder. Have a nice day.) |
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03-16-2004, 03:14 AM | #36 (permalink) |
Upright
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morals
i agree with what a few other people have said here - do what feels right. trust me, after your first time, it's not such a big taboo or question mark. really, it's not such a big deal as it seems when you're 14.
treat everyone with respect. she says no, then it's no. you'll know when it's the right time, and if it's after you're married, then so be it. i know that my girlfriend and i would be chewing off the countertops though it we weren't going at as often as we do. no one needs another headache in their life, and if you think you'll end up regretting something, don't do it. otherwise, do what makes you happy. that convoluted set of discrete statements is the best i can come up with. |
03-16-2004, 08:22 AM | #37 (permalink) | |
Banned
Location: We Have Just Lost Cabin Pressure
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Not really callous, since I come from divorced parents, I do have experience in the matter. Most of my friends find it odd, when we meet someone with parents who are still married. I know plenty of people who have normal relationships later in life even after their parents divorce. i think it is just a easy excuse people use to mask their own insecurities/hang ups about relationships. blaming your parents for everything is a sorry excuse. |
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03-16-2004, 02:42 PM | #39 (permalink) | ||
/nɑndəsˈkrɪpt/
Location: LV-426
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03-16-2004, 03:09 PM | #40 (permalink) |
who ever said streaking was a bad thing?
Location: Calgary
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The Two I really follow is (and this may sound complicated):
1) Never going out/having sex with my best friends sister 2) And Never going out/having sex with my Sisters/Brothers female best friend they sound a little stupid but it cuts down on awkward situations and I always feel like I'm being set up with someone and I don't really feel like being set up b/c I think that they were taking pity on me. well.... those are my two whether you like it or not those are mine and not your views.... so..... I think we all need to get back to the topic at hand.... what morals do you have about Sex |
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morals, sex |
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