Unknown2U

Soooo.. I stumbled upon this site was trying to wash off stinky vagina from my hands. I found a good solution and ended up really liking it here. So here is my first swing at a post. Bare with me.... I need some advice for this(same) situation. I met this woman. She's got great job. Very attractive. Not crazy(so far). And we have a great time together. Well we didnt sleep together for the first month because we both are coming off divorces and just wanted to "do things right". That was fine for me, but when we finally messed around and I touched her she kinda had a bad odor down there. Now I guess Ive been around alot women and have hardly ran into this dilemma before-Maybe they had an odor once but never happened again in my experience. After we messed around it wouldnt come off for a good 2-3 days. It wasnt a fishy odor, but it just wasnt right if you know what i mean. It didnt smell like daisies thats for damn sure. So I just blew it off like maybe she was having a bad day or something. I forgot to add she lives a hour away so the next time we saw each other(a week) we finally had sex and again it smelled awful. I love to give a woman oral sex but there was no way my mouth was going near that. So my question is, how do you bring this up without sounding really bad. I do like her, but the odor is just too much for me. Id rather not even do anything than to have to pretend its not there. Its almost a deal breaker to be honest. But ive tried to think of how I could tell her without her getting upset. Any opinions or experiences would be very cool because I dunno what to do with this.

Roy Hobbs

There is no good answer. If you tell you lose, if you can't, find one that isn't odifferous

dlish

maybe she's got a fungal problem down there. Perhaps her pH levels are not right. There are things she can do to regulate it, but ill leave the advice to the ladies here because i'd be talking out of my ass if i said i knew anything about it.

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Poetry

Could be diet issues. Could be, as dlish said, fungal or pH balance issues. Bacterical infection. Yeast imbalance. Could have an STD and not know it. Could have had a biopsy recently and still be healing. Could have internal injuries that aren't healing well. Could have cervical cancer. Could just be naturally stinky. Could be wearing nylon underwear too often. Could be not showering and cleansing enough. Could be doing a lot of intense exercise before seeing you. Could be storing beef jerky for late night snack purposes.

Lotsa could-be's.

Could be that you should (delicately) suggest she go to a doctor.

Could be that you get flavored lube. Or just Febreeze her frequently. Either or.

__________________
"You know what? Fuck the moon! He controls our water and our women. I've had enough!"

ASU2003

Have you both had an STD-test? I would assume doctors would check down there during that.

genuinegirly

There is no delicate way to bring it up, and unless she's a chain smoker with no sense of smell, it's pretty much impossible for her to not notice her own odor. She knows something is not right. Non-cotton panties alone will never make a woman smell that bad.

There are a couple of things that come to mind that would promote such an odor:
UTI or yeast infection, which can be caused by any of the following...
Leaving in tampons for too long
Anal & vaginal intercourse in the same session
Douching
Poor hygiene (some women never bother to clean that part when showering)
Not changing or washing underwear daily
Or...
Atkins or other meat-heavy diet

A friend of mine really struggles with that last one. Since she started a modified Atkins diet to minimize seizures, she has been very careful about wearing cotton panties and using cleansing wipes, but she still struggles. Abrupt and significant changes in diet can wreak havoc on the vaginal flora.

Your friend - since her divorce, has she had good health care? Does she seem especially stressed? These factors could be impacting her health more than she realizes. Perhaps you could shower together, or encourage her to relax by running her a hot bath - find a way to incorporate cleaning into your foreplay.

__________________
"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

EventHorizon

latex gloves + chanel no.5?

__________________
Does Marcellus Wallace have the appearance of a female canine? Then for what reason did you attempt to copulate with him as if he were a female canine?

Quote:

Originally Posted by canuckguy Pretty simple really, do your own thing as long as it does not fuck with anyone's enjoyment of life.

dlish

showering together gives me thoughts of unprotected sex. With the possibility tat the smell is from an STI or STD, that should be a no-no until she gets tested first. you'll have to wait 3 months from the last person she had sex with before you can certain of an STD.


get her to give you a headjob while she's cleaning the dishes :P

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

raeanna74

Very well could be caused by an STD. Yeast infections do not generally have an odor of their own unless they are in conjunction with an STD or BV (Bacterial Vaginosis). Bacterial Vaginosis has a very characteristic fishy odor and can become very strong. This can be caused by not wiping properly (Back to front), anal/vaginal sex hopping, as well as any other infections that make the individual more prone to Bacterial infection. BV is not something that a man can usually have issues from but he can carry it between women and in some extreme cases develop a UTI from it.

The only way that I could see dealing with it is if you suggest that she have a yearly exam. If she has BV or any STD it will be caught by a PAP smear. Also, I had a Dr who suggested that I douche regularly with a simple vinegar douche. While this is normally advised against by Dr's, in some cases it can be needed to control the Ph and bacterial that some women can be prone to. If she asks why you suggest it say that she had an odor that you weren't familiar with and caused you a little worry. If she can't handle the criticism imagine what other issues she could have.

Personally, I would much rather have a man tell me about something that makes him uncomfortable than loose him because he's grossed out.

__________________
"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

Sheepy

*removed*

Unknown2U

Thanks everyone for the advice and laughs. Here is an update. The one and only time we had sex I wore a condom. Thank God. She just told me last night(right before I was gonna have the "talk" about the issue) that she has cervical cancer. With that comes HPV. Which I know is HIGHLY contagious. Sooo, thats that. I really dont know what to do now. My sister who is a doctor said to get rid of her because shes got a long road to go down. I would feel like an asshole just abandoning her because 1. shes got stinky vag 2. shes about to have chemo and radiation treatments. I still need to go get checked for the virus but it reads I wouldnt know if I had it or not in most cases. Im in great shape and eat healthy and from what Ive read thats the fastest way to get rid of it if I do in fact have it. Im kinda in a shitty mood to be honest. My gut feeling is to let her go but I know Id feel like a total asshole doing it because she is a really good person.

genuinegirly

Oh wow, cervical cancer is far worse than anything I was thinking. I'm glad she was upfront with you, but it sounds like you have some tough decisions to make.

__________________
"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

noodle

Actually, with HPV comes cervical cancer. And she may not have to go through chemo and/or radiation. Just for the sake of education... And large percentage of the population has some form of HPV... There are over 100 strains. Depends on how much you want to be with her. If she had some of the preliminary treatments, they can totally screw up your pH and cause really, REALLY bad problems. I speak from the experience of severe dysplasia. Had I waited another 4-6 weeks, my problems would have been cancerous.
You also might want to double check that she was dx with HPV. I was a virgin in every sense of the word when my stuff happened and I still test negative for HPV 15 years later even though they assumed at the time that's what caused it. Sounds like you may want to talk more, if you want to continue the relationship.

__________________

hunnychile

Wow.
I'm glad that you found out what's wrong and even more relieved that she's getting her cancer treated and able to share that with you. It's great that you and she are opening up & communicating and I think perhaps you are both lucky to know one another and that she can share her situation with you. Also, don't you feel that you should remain friends for more than the one reason of sharing sex, in fact...just being a pal during this tough time would say volumes about your strenght of character.

If I met someone I really liked and found out they had cancer...there's no way that I'd just "high tail it outta town" so to speak.

But then, I'm not someone else or you.

__________________
"I need compassion, understanding and chocolate." - NJB

Poetry

Yeah... like Noodle said, just because she has cervical cancer doesn't mean she has HPV. You might want to clarify that with her.

Also, if she does have HPV, there are some lubes that protect against it.

Personally, if someone had sex with me and knew they had an STD and did not inform me prior to sex so I could make my own decision regarding what risk I'm willing to accept for sex, I would ditch them immediately.

__________________
"You know what? Fuck the moon! He controls our water and our women. I've had enough!"

Unknown2U

Update 2...She has a very aggressive form of cancer, but they think they can just do chemo and radiation and take care of it. The first doctor said she needed a radical hysterectomy. That really freaked her out she said. But the specialist she saw after that said no need to just start cutting her open and see how the chemo and radiation do first. About the HPV...she swears up and down that shes only been with her husband since the divorce. And I believe her. She said she went to yearly paps and they never saw this before now. Im gonna stay in her corner no matter what-sex or no sex. Shes a cool chic. But, I really dont think she understands, or quite possibly is in denial, about the severity of this. Ill keep yall posted. Thanks for the replies..and hope you all have a safe memorial day weekend

raeanna74

Wow, personally I'd go with the hysterectomy (they wouldn't necessarily have to remove the ovaries but they would have to take the cervix). Chemo and radiation come with really nasty and sometimes long lasting side effects.

She could have had HPV years ago but the abnormal cells didn't develop enough for a PAP to catch them until now.

As for the stinky vagina - she still needs to take care of that. BV can also cause the abnormal PAP results so it would throw off all further testing while she's being treated.

__________________
"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

chinese crested

She cant be certain of who her ex has had sexual contact with. If she knowingly risked your health - thats wrong. Obviously the other side of the coin is that you like her and enjoy her company. The dog had cancer in her mouth - and that didnt smell very nice - it was cut out and she recovered well from it - and then I didnt have to pretend I liked her kisses - dear old bean. I loved her despite her illnesses. Only you know how muchof your heart you feel safe to freely give. True friendship is of great value - perhaps you could go back to that - you could in all honesty I think, say that her illness scares you, but you want to support her, get her better and see whereyou go from there. Tell her you dont want to tempt fate by building too much in the way of plans for the future. I am glad your sister isnt my doctor - although I do understand that her heart is leaping to your protection.

zenda

I had a few friends with cancer. They were dealing with it responsibiley - seeing doctors and making good choices based on their recommendations. However, in coming to terms with the spread of possibilities and implications, biasses and swings between optimism and pessimism were extreme. Your commiting to stay in her corner, no matter what, at the same time as consulting with people as you're working out how best to do the right things, means she's fortunate to know you. Much respect to you, Unknown2U.

__________________
ZENDA

Unknown2U

I just wanted to thank everyone for the advice and taking the time to respond in this thread. Im not going to lie, this is something Ive never faced or dealt with, and it is hard trying to understand the best way for me to be there for her. She is like zenda said, up and down. She is frustrated because she has gotten two different opinions and two different avenues for treatment. Because this is such a rare form of this cervical cancer she is having to go to through the ringer of doctors and specialist and its frustrating. I told her to call the specialist(which is renowned at cervical cancer in our state) and speak to her again. Just a tidbit of info..the original doctor(her gynecologist) sent her to a specialist in her town. That doctor freaked out and scheduled her for a radical hysterectomy for a the doctor in my town which happens to be one of the states leading doctors in the matter. That doctor said shes seen this way too many times and its not nearly as bad as the original two doctors said it was and that chemo and radiation should be fine for it. With that said, she was going to do chemo/radiation back in her town and the doctors and clinic she went to said they cant believe they arent doing the hysterectomy. So that confused the shit out of her. Thats why I had suggested to call the doctor here(the good one) and just talk to her again and explain she is scared and frustrated over all these different opinions. She is hurting so that is making it worse. Ill keep you all updated. Hope everyone has a safe weekend.

genuinegirly

I'd probably be frustrated with all of that conflicting information as well! You're giving her sound advice. Like Zenda, I think she is lucky to have someone like you in her corner.

__________________
"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

mathew856

It sounds like she's got a fungal problem down there, she needs to see a doctor. Maybe you can suggest it to her... though I really don't know how you can do this mate...

dlish

did you actually read this thread or just the OP?

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy