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Old 01-14-2010, 09:36 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Bring a Condom?

It is pretty normal for me to over think things. I consider myself intelligent, although not necessary a fast thinker. Therefore, I tend to like to be over-prepared for whatever comes my way. This topic will serve as a good idea as to the kind of things I over think about all the time, in an effort to be fully prepared for when it comes. I am posting anon, being I feel uncomfortable discussing such things with, anybody.

So, lets say you have hit it off well with this girl. She wants to hang out again and you get the vibe that there may be more in store this time around. Would you bring a condom? After all, if you were to get so lucky, the last thing you or she needs is a kid as well as not liking the idea of having protected sex.

However, the other side of me wonders what she might be thinking in this situation. Does she wonder why I am bringing a condom, as if I knew things were going down? Maybe I can pretend or maybe she assumes that I always carry a condom around "just in case." I also don't like this idea, because I am a virgin, and I don't really want her to get the idea that I always carry a condom because I am ready and willing to use it with whoever/whenever. Sounds strange, I know, but that is just the kind of person I am.

I can already imagine some of the responses and I appreciate all who reply. However, I am looking for honest input on what girls are thinking in a situation like this, or if there are guys like me who think like this.
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Old 01-14-2010, 09:48 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Does she know you are a virgin?

Since the idea of carrying a condom seems to be uncomfortable for you because you think it will give her the wrong impression of you, why not talk to her about the situation if you are, indeed, in a position to "get lucky?"

What you can do is limit any sexual encounter with her to making out/heavy petting/etc. Give yourself a boundary, and stick to it - don't dare have sex without a condom. It's just dumb. If she tells you she'd like things to go further, explain your situation: you do not have a condom with you. If she has a condom, you know what her intentions were - and if you are comfortable with the idea, go for it. If not, let her know that you would like to take things further, but safely, and at another time.
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Old 01-14-2010, 09:59 AM   #3 (permalink)
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This is your best bet. They don't go bad (as in breaking down from wear and tear) and they fit in your wallet. I carry this with me at all times. I had the same problem you did, the "should I? Shouldn't I?" dilemma as comes to taking a condom with me. I always struggled about that, so this fixes the problem. I always have one, so I don't have to worry about it. This way, I almost put it out of my mind until I'm in a bathroom stall with some girl I met 3 hours, 3 shots, 2 beers, 3 long island iced teas ago.

Put one of these in your wallet WAY before seeing her again, you will forget about it and as long as you don't dump everything in your wallet on the table, she won't ever know you have one... until you are sliding one on and giving her the stiff one eye.

As coming from someone that had podling scares and the always fun wait in line at the local health dept to find out if your dick is going to rot off or not; it's worth it to be over-safe.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:04 AM   #4 (permalink)
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why does she have to know you're bringing/carrying a condom?

you should always carry a condom. no excuses.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:05 AM   #5 (permalink)
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If she's worth your time, she will appreciate you having a condom.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:08 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Carry a condom. No questions asked. Is she gonna strip search you? It just means you have a surer chance of being comfortable when you get lucky!

EDIT: Carry condoms

Last edited by Xerxys; 01-14-2010 at 10:12 AM..
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Old 01-14-2010, 11:20 AM   #7 (permalink)
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I always have condoms on me.

It no longer freaks out my wife, which is odd considering we don't use them...
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Old 01-14-2010, 11:53 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Bring a condom and say you always carry a condom. If she was wanting to fuck you she will just be grateful.
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Old 01-14-2010, 01:03 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Carry a condom with you at all times. It's important to be protected! I have known a few virgins that are all about getting laid, then they run off with some bimbo at a party and get lucky (unprotected that is). I understand that this girl you are interested in probably isn't a bimbo....but it's better to be safe then sorry. If you are getting ready to do business and you pull out your condom and she gets upset, butt-hurt, or try's to tell you she's STD free...DON'T cave! that usually means she's bat-shit crazy and your not the first guy shes done this too! Be safe, and have fun!
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Old 01-14-2010, 01:15 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Carry.

My boy was just 17 and upset after an argument with his (amazing, lovely, very special) girlfriend when he got likker'd up and went upstairs at some house party with a silly, way-too-young hottie.

Now his life is totally different and I'm a grampa. He lost his (amazing, lovely, very special) girl, has been working factory jobs after dropping out of school to support his kid, his life is now a long, low-pay grind as far as his eye can see . . .

Don't fret. Don't be an idiot because you wonder what "someone might think". You've already thought all you need.

Carry.
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Old 01-14-2010, 01:28 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Carry. Driving to the store all hornied-up with a boner is not a lot of fun, I've done it twice. She doesn't have to know you have one until you're both naked and she's sucked you hard anyways, at which point she'd be a little out of line to judge you for thinking you might get lucky.

By the way, this line of thought is super common among evangelical/religious kids. If they carry proper protection, it's evidence they were planning to get their hump on, and therefore premeditated and sinful, whereas if they just get hot and bothered and end up sticking it in, well, they just got swept up and had a moment of weakness, which is somehow more forgivable. As if there is a karmic difference between 1st degree premeditated fornication, vs just 3rd degree vaginaslaughter.
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Last edited by telekinetic; 01-14-2010 at 01:31 PM..
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Old 01-14-2010, 01:40 PM   #12 (permalink)
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And if you have daughters, tell them to carry too.

It takes two people to fuck, and just because one of them has a vagina doesn't stop her carrying protection for a penis.

Think about it - would you rather she have a condom in her purse for a date, or a baby in her belly for nine months and in her arms for a lifetime?
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Old 01-14-2010, 01:42 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Condom now or abortion later.
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Old 01-14-2010, 01:53 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by guccilvr View Post
why does she have to know you're bringing/carrying a condom?
I was going to say--is she going to go through your pockets or something?

Unless you think it'll mess with YOUR behavior to be carrying one (which, let's be honest, it might), you have no reason not to be packing.
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Old 01-14-2010, 01:56 PM   #15 (permalink)
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No, what he meant is if it comes to sex and he pulls out a condom, she'll question him about the reason he had one in the first place. It's a pretty weird train of thought, but that's what he meant.
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Old 01-14-2010, 01:57 PM   #16 (permalink)
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... if it comes to sex ... he pulls out a condom ....

Exactly. Mission accomplished, no?

...

Is there some kind of secret safety dance going on here that I'm unaware of? I remember numerous occasions where I would have chopped off my pinky for a condom... never the other way 'round. "Damn, you've got a condom? Ugh, jeez! This ruins everything," is not something I've ever heard. This playing hard to get stuff seems to be way too Moonlighting to occur in reality. Turns out women want sex just as much as men despite the specter of Victorian bullshit stains in the back of some of our heads telling us that sex is dirty. Condoms are a necessity... no different than cash at the gas station. This issue must be a Midwest / Christian guilt/shame/angst thing. Either that or I've been rockin' the mattress with E-Z-bake 'ho-bags for the last decade.

Last edited by Plan9; 01-14-2010 at 02:06 PM..
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Old 01-14-2010, 02:15 PM   #17 (permalink)
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I think it's related to the idea that if you take a condom along you must have decided the girl was a slut, and no girl will sleep with a guy who thinks she's a slut.
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Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

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Old 01-14-2010, 02:35 PM   #18 (permalink)
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If a girl thinks like that, she isn't worth his time. Refer to post #5.
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Old 01-14-2010, 03:03 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LoganSnake View Post
If a girl thinks like that, she isn't worth his time. Refer to post #5.
I agree, but that they're out there is undeniable.
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Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
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Old 01-14-2010, 03:05 PM   #20 (permalink)
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um I think if you get to the point with any woman where you're both wanting to have sex and thinking of breaking out the condoms, then you're both adults and were both considering it long before you got to it. So having a condom just means you were both thinking the same thing and that you are an intelligent and well-prepared man.

Carry a condom, she will appreciate your concern with safety and birth control far more than she will entertain the thought that you might have thought she'd be an easy lay. By the way, who would really think that unless they were sleeping with someone they only just met? And also, consenting adults make their own choices.
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Old 01-14-2010, 03:23 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Don't just bring one...


Bring several boxes. Different brands, sizes, colors, flavors... Give her lots of options.
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Old 01-14-2010, 05:21 PM   #22 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LoganSnake View Post
No, what he meant is if it comes to sex and he pulls out a condom, she'll question him about the reason he had one in the first place. It's a pretty weird train of thought, but that's what he meant.
Let's put ourselves in the girl's in question's shoes (let's say... three inch black patent heels, with black back-seam thigh-high stockings. Yes. That's better.) for just one second.

For this to be a problem, she'd have to have these thoughts, in sequence:

"I want to have sex with this guy, but I didn't bring any protection. Boo."
"Oh! He has a condom."
"Why would he have a condom? Does he want to have sex with me?"
"I'd certainly never have sex with someone so disgusting. I'm out of here."
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Old 01-14-2010, 05:27 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by World's King View Post
Don't just bring one...


Bring several boxes. Different brands, sizes, colors, flavors... Give her lots of options.
Yes! An entire trunk-full! Oh, wait... yeah. That would be creepy.
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Old 01-14-2010, 05:30 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by genuinegirly View Post
Yes! An entire trunk-full! Oh, wait... yeah. That would be creepy.
Don't be this guy:

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Old 01-14-2010, 05:38 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by genuinegirly View Post
Yes! An entire trunk-full! Oh, wait... yeah. That would be creepy.
Of course that would be creepy. Duh! He needs the trunk to stow away the body.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ratbastid View Post
...

For this to be a problem, she'd have to have these thoughts, in sequence:

"I want to have sex with this guy, but I didn't bring any protection. Boo."
"Oh! He has a condom."
"Why would he have a condom? Does he want to have sex with me?"
"I'd certainly never have sex with someone so disgusting. I'm out of here."
Quote:
Originally Posted by Daniel_ View Post
I agree, but that they're out there is undeniable.

Last edited by Xerxys; 01-14-2010 at 05:40 PM..
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Old 01-14-2010, 05:43 PM   #26 (permalink)
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I don't see it happening, though. Once you're at "sex now", you're a good guy for being prepared.

"Hey, baby, I'm packin' latex" isn't exactly dessert conversation, obviously. But once the need for such a device presents itself, you're never not a hero for having the foresight to come prepared.
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Old 01-14-2010, 05:59 PM   #27 (permalink)
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bring a condom.

if she doesnt want to root you silly for being a considerate person not only on your behalf, but also on hers, then she's not worth showing your dragon to.
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Old 01-14-2010, 06:14 PM   #28 (permalink)
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Safe sex is sexy, period.
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Old 01-14-2010, 06:21 PM   #29 (permalink)
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Another key difference in behavior, Regnerus reports, is that evangelical Protestant teen-agers are significantly less likely than other groups to use contraception. This could be because evangelicals are also among the most likely to believe that using contraception will send the message that they are looking for sex.

Read more: Dept. of Disputation: Red Sex, Blue Sex : The New Yorker
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Old 01-14-2010, 07:05 PM   #30 (permalink)
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Quote:
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no girl will sleep with a guy who thinks she's a slut.
Heh... I don't know about that.
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Old 01-14-2010, 07:27 PM   #31 (permalink)
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Buy a box of them. Walk in, place them on a table, look her straight in face and say "just in case" with a wink.

Its a great ice breaker.
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Old 01-15-2010, 06:45 AM   #32 (permalink)
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I bring my racquet to the gym every time I go, just in case someone invites me to play racquetball. I never thought to be embarrassed about it. Maybe I should be?
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Old 01-15-2010, 07:25 AM   #33 (permalink)
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I just wanted to say that I'm impressed with the concept of those Trojan2Gos. I had no idea the "hot wallet, failed condom" problem had been solved. Yay for progress!
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Old 01-15-2010, 09:23 AM   #34 (permalink)
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Wish they were around in my teens.
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Old 01-15-2010, 09:30 AM   #35 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cimarron29414 View Post
I bring my racquet to the gym every time I go, just in case someone invites me to play racquetball. I never thought to be embarrassed about it. Maybe I should be?
I was waiting for DK or somebody equally trigger happy to do a concealed carry permit comparison. Carry that thing around for years and never use it.
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Old 01-15-2010, 11:24 AM   #36 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Redlemon View Post
I just wanted to say that I'm impressed with the concept of those Trojan2Gos. I had no idea the "hot wallet, failed condom" problem had been solved. Yay for progress!
Sadly, the problem hasn't be solved at all.

These condoms are not validated for full stability across their lifetime (generally five years post manufacture) if retained in a pocket. The changes of temperature and movement in a pocket will almost certainly cause them to suffer from micro fissures in the seal, allowing bacteria in.

What they are good for is to be popped into a pocket (such as a jacket or purse) where they will not be squashed and twisted as you move about, and kept there until you get home and take them out. As such, they are the same as any normal foiled condom (but much more expensive).
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Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
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Comes willowing across the sand;
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╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
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Old 01-15-2010, 11:46 AM   #37 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Daniel_ View Post
Sadly, the problem hasn't be solved at all.
So, Mr. Condom, I can't carry these things in my wallet? Not for long periods of time? I had mine in my pocket for a few months and they seemed to be fine to me. What is the recommended time for something like that?
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Old 01-15-2010, 11:47 AM   #38 (permalink)
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Thanks Daniel_, always good to get the professional answer. So, is there any hope on pocket storage being solved in the future, or is it a lost cause? (I only ask out of curiosity; I've been out of the condom purchasing market for a long time now.)
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Old 01-15-2010, 11:57 AM   #39 (permalink)
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If I bring a condom, how can I use the "Oh, damn. I didn't bring one..." line?!
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Dude, there's nothing wrong with packing a rubber. It shows responsibility, and, trust me, it's a much easier method than mine.

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"This could take a while..."
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Old 01-15-2010, 11:59 AM   #40 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Daniel_ View Post

These condoms are not validated for full stability across their lifetime (generally five years post manufacture) if retained in a pocket. The changes of temperature and movement in a pocket will almost certainly cause them to suffer from micro fissures in the seal, allowing bacteria in.

What they are good for is to be popped into a pocket (such as a jacket or purse) where they will not be squashed and twisted as you move about, and kept there until you get home and take them out. As such, they are the same as any normal foiled condom (but much more expensive).
I never got why people carry condoms in their wallets. Too bulky. Most people have something they carry on them regularly other than a wallet. I have condoms stuffed in several backpacks, my car, my motorcycle, favorite jackets, etc. I'm regular Branch Davidian of safe sex: one behind every door.

I'm surprised they don't have a cell phone sleeve with a fortified condom slot. Most people take better care of their cell phones than their wallets.

Last edited by Plan9; 01-15-2010 at 12:03 PM..
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