The Stumble Inn
 

If I had a bar, I think it would be cool to have it named "The Stumble Inn"

So step up to the bar and order a drink!

Instead of Psychologist, I'm the bartender, and I'll need several assistants! I'll pick based upon who wants to stand behind the bar and be sober and who doesn't!

Welcome to the grand opening celebration!

Can I have some Hawaiian Punch? :p

fuck hawaiian punch man, how bout a scotch?

Hawaiian Punch and Scotch coming right up.

how about a Ketel One martini, extra dry with a twist, please, and keep them coming.

Ketel One Martini, extra dry with twist,

Vodka Martini

3 ounces Vodka
1 ounce Dry Vermouth
Shake with cracked ice and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with an olive.

Sorry, I don't qualify. I'm drunk.

two problems...
1) you gave me an olive when I asked for a twist, the drink is undrinkable with an olive.
2) Too much vermouth...swish the glass with vermouth and dump it out, then add the vodka.

You know, maybe I should help you tend the bar.

wrkime, that was your first test. your The Stumble Inns first bar assistant.

looks like I'm a bar back now...need any glasses boss? How's the bottled beer doing? I'm going to double check the kegs and the CO2 in the walk-in.

I like your attitude. You keep all tips, and all the free liquor you can steal out the back.

::loading up my car with vodka::

Hey we're out of vodka...let's use water instead, as long as people are ordering mixed drinks they won't know the difference. We'll mix it with hand sanitizer so it has that alcohol taste.

The kegs are all set, by the way.

Thanks wrkime....I think it may be time we hire another bartender. Us 2 couldn't possibly supply all of TFP with alcohol. They'll drink us dry.

We'll look for new recruits over the next few days.

What about me? ;) Can I be an assistant?

In the meantime, pass me a shot of Absinth, a teaspoon of a sugar and your lighter. You better have a lighter. I'll kick your ass if you don't.
Now, question; what do you think i'm going to do with these items?

Here's your lighter and drop the attitude or you'll be bounced. Make sure I get my lighter back. You want some matches?

The answer to your question is that you are going to add the sugar to the Absinth and heat it. It makes it more tasty.

Absinthe: contains wormword; also, a hallucinogen.

You have all the makings of a barkeep.....but we'll see.

Hey boss, are we a smoke-free bar or can our patrons light up?

Sure, light up all they want. Just in a certain section.

WE NEED A BOUNCER!

Where's Bones? He'd be a good bouncer. We need to make sure their qualified.

I'm thinking they need to have atleast a felony to qualify for bouncer.

Bones would make a good one. Possibly World's King.

KWSN wants to be the bouncer. KWSN also has a very good reason; because he is this guy.

http://www.johnshaft.com/theman/hayes.jpg

That's right, KWSN is Isaac Hayes. Well, not actually Isaac Hayes, but he looks like Isaac Hayes. Actually, he looks nothing like Isaac Hayes, but he has a tough, deep voice like Isaac Hayes. Actually, he bears no resemblance whatsoever, in any way, shape, or form to Isaac Hayes, but he listens to his music a lot. KWSN thinks that this is a very good reason that he should be a bouncer.

Oh yeah, and KWSN used to be somewhat of a drunk and now is sober, which is good for a bouncer, because it gives him experience with drunks.

KWSN also speaks in third-person, which is another big plus. KWSN pities the fool who don't make him the bouncer.

Edit: And as for arrests, I have quite a few under my belt. Nothing too serious, but I know the ropes.

marcopolo would be a good candidate as well...we'll have to see if Mrs Polo will let him work at the bar.

A crazy person makes a good bouncer, I vote for KWSN.

An added benefit is that he is no longer stuck to Bones' balls.

As owner of The Stumble Inn, KWSN is the bouncer. Nothing scarier and threatening than a big black Isaac Hayes.

You stand at the door, shake drunks down for money, and kick the rowdy ones out.

Alright! Everybody down! This is a raid!

YzermanS19.. Detective Doc_34465, TFPPD.

Do you have a license for this establishment?

We have sources saying you've been selling an illegal narcotic here. You wouldn't no anything about that, now would you?

So what if he did, eh? KWSN don't see no warrant. You better show KWSN yo' warrant or get yo' punk ass outta here, YOU UNDERSTAND?

**Detective Doc_34465 stares KWSN down hard, then adresses YzermanS19**

I'll be on you like glue YzermanS19. You so much as spit on the pavement, and I'll be on you like stink on shit. You got that!

**To KWSN**
As for you, Punk! That your 5.0 out there being towed? Illegaly parked.. Thats gotta suck..

**Doc_34465 lights a cigarette as he makes for the door**

See ya around YzermanS19.. Heh Heh Heh..

Somenosuke wonders if Doc knows that she snuck out to egg his car and slash his tires while he was playing Mr. Tough Guy..


Tee hee hee...

Damn! Thats the third time this week..

The Sarge isn't gonna like this..

I used to frequent a place called the Stumble Inn in Tempe, AZ.
Anyone know if it's still there?

Hey KW, good to see you, brutha. *Hands KWSN a C note and walks up to the bar*
Hey wrkime, could I get a pint o'Guinness and a double Jaeger? ...Thanks, man.
Hey Y-man, did you ever hire that cute Miranda?

Ooo! *Ouch*

You can't bounce me without a bouncer.
Here's your lighter.
Mmm, yes - The French Ritual thankyou very much.

So anyway - Do I get a chance or what?

And thanks richeee ;)

Perfect pint of Guinness and your double Jaeger, richeee.

Miranda, sorry to have been so abrupt, but with this new job, I wanted to be assertive. Hang out, have a good time.

hey barkeep..................send me a freakin' beer down here eh.

ashtrays?i don't see no fuckin' ashtrays!!!

what kinda shithole is this?ohh................strippers,well hey this could be an allright place after all.

*shaking out the cobwebs from last night and thinking "Well its almost 10:00am"*

I'll take a black and tan and a little guy (shot of GM).

Not too many people in here today -- what's going on?

*Looks in flymans direction*

Smoked my last one on the way over here -- mind if I bum one from you?

be my guest.....you know where that damn barkeep is?

i just want a freakin' beer please.

Nice place. I been hanging out over at the "Stumble and Retch" watching the strippers. Your place looks cleaner.

sorry, flyman, I was taking a dump...here's your beer and ashtray.

and for you Troit a black and tan and a little guy

Ladies, Patrons, lend me your ears. Should we give Miranda a chance behind the bar???

Is Doc gone? I think we might have to bribe him.

/slides 2x Benjamins under a coaster towards Doc.

Enjoy your refreshment, officer.

Give Miranda a chance!! ^_^

Can I have another hawaiian punch, pleeeaaseee? (I'm underage, y'know.. no alkiehol for me!)