ratbastid

http://www.guardian.co.uk/internatio...121812,00.html

Now I've had some customers try to pull some shit on me in the past, but.... This takes the potato pancake.

Work in Tech Support? How about Customer Service? What's the weirdest thing anybody ever tried on you?

juanvaldes

flamingpeach

HAH!

Thats one of the funniest things i've read in a long time.

Potato's replacing parts is rather funny

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I've eaten my veggies all my life so bring it on, I am educated and strong for the revolution.

MacGnG

HAH he got greedy and then he got arrested stoopid

rat

that's fucking brilliant--in a twisted way. having waited tables and driven pizza, i've been on the receiving end of humorous things. at one house, a man robbed one of our drivers with a gun, went back inside, and was eating pizza when the police showed up to arrest him. i've also had a man attempt to pay for his pizza with a case of bud light. I've had people eat their entire meal in a restaurant known for giving portions almost no one can finish and then complain about the food...with nothing left on the plate sitting in front of them. i've been tipped with free rounds of golf at courses that no longer exist, and various other hijinks. anytime you deal with people and money, they'll pull just about anything trying to find a way to keep the money and still receive the product/service

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sailor

Hahahaha, thats great. Although you would think he would have a little more sense than that...

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"Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws."
--Plato

Iliftrocks

I'd a put in tomatos, they rot faster

yep

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bill hicks - "I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out."

*Nikki*

I still don't know who is stupider here.....the man who put the potatoes in the computer or the dumb asses who gave him the free replacement.

quadro2000

The whole story was a set-up for this line, wasn't it.

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You have to laugh at yourself...because you'd cry your eyes out if you didn't. - Emily Saliers

aintyoboyfriend

I work at a car dealership.

I had a lady once who had stolen someones identity. she had Military id's, drivers licenses, pay stubs, everything.

She was just about to buy the car, and we only made the connection when we ran her credit report. She wrote her own social security number on the credit application.

She was arrested a short time later.

Kaos

I was thinking the same thing...that guy wouldn't leave my store with a new computer.

GuttersnipeXL

"It is hard to imagine how the potatoes could get into a computer's casing.

"When computers leave the factory they are packed in plastic to prevent damage from condensation.

"If they are running for a long time they get hot and in theory it would be possible to cook a potato in a computer, but who would try that?"


Hey asshole! Ya think maybe the guy took the thing apart and put 'em there himself? Some people, I tell ya...

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When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. HST

water_boy1999

It's amazing the tenacity of some people.

I used to work at Footlocker years ago. We would have people come in all the time with a pair of shoes that had obviously been worn several hundred times. The leather was cracked, the laces torn, the color faded, the sole completely run down to paper thinness. It was usually a mom coming in to tell us that the shoes are defective and their kids need a new pair of FREE shoes. I don't know what people do to these shoes, but sometimes they will look fairly worn, and the person will say they just bought them a week ago in our store.

Funny thing is, as their sole stockperson, I knew what we had in stock and what we were sold out of and most importantly, WHEN we sold out of them.

People.....

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Doh!!!!


-Homer Simpson

NbCal

I'm glad to see I'm not the only one that uses my computer to bake potatoes.

Mr.Deflok

Honestly, at least next time replace the good parts with crap parts...

numist

Heres one I saw a year ago, Im glad its still hosted, its hilarious.

The site is by a tech support guy who used to work hardware helpdesk, and is now retired.

And the image:

cchris

That is identical to my mate's young Son who did that a few years ago and didn't we give him plenty about teaching the young uns about computer porn options.

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There's a fine line between participation and mockery

bonehed1

lol at my old job I had a customer come in saying there computer didnt work and come to find out the dog had done its business in the system. The numbnut was complaining of a bad smell and didnt think to look in the system. I mean how can you miss a turd the size of a baseball in a computer with no case covers on.

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Stuff is Good

omega2K4

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA.

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"While the State exists there can be no freedom. When there is freedom there will be no State." - Vladimir Ilyich Lenin

"Reason has always existed, but not always in a reasonable form."- Karl Marx

Chytrak

A few years ago, I was working tech support for a mom and pop internet business in the eastern wastelands of New Mexico. Broadband was not available out there to the average customer, so everything was 56K dial-up. A customer calls with the usual complaint that he is not able to get on the internet. I asked him to walk me through the steps he takes to get on the internet...

Customer: "Well, I double click on this here Big Blue 'E' and then I'm on the internet."

Me: "Do you hear the modem trying to connect when you do that?"

C: "Modem? What the hell is that?"

M: "It's what connects your computer to the internet."

C: "Naw...This computer doesn't have a modem. I don't need one of them damn things."

M: "How do you connect to the internet then?"

C: "I just click on that Blue 'E'..."

After some explaining of what the funny sounds were that came from his PC after clicking the E, he realized he had a modem and didn't know it. I managed to keep my patience with the guy, but it was also all I could do to keep from laughing.

anleja

This thread is hilarious! These stories all beat anything I can come up with.

BlueBongo

That's pretty funny.. maybe I should do that locally with an old system so I can get a new one free of charge, doubt it'd work.. though who knows?

I work in customer service and yes people do stupid things sometimes. I had a customer call me when I worked for an online pharmacy to ask if we sold cable tv... but that's about the most amusing one lately. The pharmacy primarily sells viagra and medications of the such.. and the person was very sincere on the phone and I knew it wasn't a prank...
Oh well. Some people are just goofy like that.

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"Things can only get so bad before they have no choice but to get better.."

krazykemist

Tech support worker here.
I think every everning and overnight tech has run into those customers that are older and lonely and just call to talk. Every company seems to have a few of those. Well we have this one lady who used to call at least once a week with reasons as to why she could not connect (even though she was authenticating and staying online for over 30 minutes). During the course of every conversation whether its your first time talking to her or not, even on the same day, she will inevitably tell you her life story. Including the little things like how she just now is going back to school and she needs the computer to work and "we" are making it hard for her because we will not give her decent service. I think the trouble ticket is still in the system where she called in and reported that her Lamp would not connect and would not let her computer connect either. Now to give her the benefit of the doubt I have seen where a DSL account had sync problems because of an automatic timer that was on a lamp but come on this is dialup. I also had the privledge of meeting her in person when I filled in for customer service and she came in to pay her bill. Of course I again recieved a telling of her life only this time was also treated to an intimate description of her recent bout with food poisoning.

Another gem of a customer also graced my phone queue. This time it was a 'routine' setup. After the first question ("What version of Windoze are you running?") it quickly turned non-routine. She could not answer the question so I decided to have her right-click My Computer and goto the Properties. I still did not get the answer till more than 8 minutes later. She was having trouble with the right-clicking part. She would never see the menu pop up to click on Properties. After spelling out r-i-g-h-t and many other tactics I became aware of a 'tink' sound every so often. In the end it was discoverd she was placing the mouse on the monitor over the icon and clicking the mouse.....

Back when I worked customer service the best call I got was someone trying to get out of a bad debt account. This gentleman called to open an account but I found another account in a different name but same address and the number he was calling from. After several questions he stated that his wife must have opened that account in his name without him knowing. i informed him the debt would have to be paid before another account could be opened, he got mad and hung up. About 5 mins later the phone rings again, it him. I'm the only CS rep on duty at this time so I get him again I guess he remembers my name so he gives me another name and account info. Again I'm looking at the caller ID of the same number and inform him of a bad debt he then says that he has to go get his nephew as he is the one who handles all his finances. ?? The same gentleman comes back to the phone about a minute later and in his best teenager voice proceeds to tell me that that account was closed and paid off. I had to mute the phone so he could not hear me laughing and pass the call to a suporvisor.

These days working graveyard I just get the normal 2am drunk who can't turn his computer on and the 3 o'clock porn surfer whose browser has been taken over by spyware from some site they've been on.

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"Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself." -- Tolstoy

irseg

Uggghhh. Tech support stories. I don't even want to THINK about that crap. I got duped into doing it for a while. I was hired as a system administrator, but instead spent almost my whole day on the phone dealing with moronic customers. That is the most infuriating job ever. There's nothing worse than doing brainless work and having your time wasted by complete morons as more and more of them keep calling.

After about 6 months of tech support, it finally came to an end after a particularly annoying hour long phone call. I nearly punched a hole in the wall and yelled about how much I hate stupid people. My boss walked in and started laughing at me. BAD MOVE. I started screaming incoherently at him, then threw one of my business cards in his face and yelled something like "CAN YOU READ THIS?? IT FUCKING SAYS 'SYSTEM FUCKING ADMINISTRATOR', NOT 'PHONE BITCH WHO HAS TALK TO FUCKING RETARDS ALL GODDAMN DAY'!!!" He just kind of walked away stunned. The effect was really good considering I'm generally quite calm and reserved.

A week later he had someone else answering tech support calls, and I still work there. My boss and I get along quite well now that the little....misunderstanding is over with.

I have no idea how you tech support guys are able to handle it. Heavy drinking is my guess.

Sparhawk

I don't know if things are just funnier at 3:30 in the morning, but that is HILARIOUS....

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"In Iraq, no doubt about it, it's tough. It's hard work. It's incredibly hard. It's - and it's hard work. I understand how hard it is. I get the casualty reports every day. I see on the TV screens how hard it is. But it's necessary work. We're making progress. It is hard work."

tinfoil

Ok, here's my story.

I am the lone sys admin at the company I work for so I am also tech support. During the great black our of '03, one of my remote users called me up (I was at home, he called my cell) and asked if we were still without power to which I responded that yes, we were still without power. Then he says, 'Hey, I'm having trouble connecting back to the office. Are you having any issues today?'

Amazing that some people are able to breath without being told how to.

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Get off your fuckin cross. We need the fuckin space to nail the next fool martyr.

Jam

STOP emailing me... my gear works fine

yakimushi

When working in the Best Buy PC sales department (about 4.5 years ago) we'd get all sorts of characters in there. Due to our location, we either got the ghetto factor or the redneck farm factor. If anyone knows the northwest side of Dayton, OH you know what I'm talking about.

One customer in particular still sticks out. This was when Intel still had 95% of the market share and AMD was still pretty rare, especially at a Best Buy. The guy approached me and asked for a "Pelentrium" (or some other variation of Pentium) computer in his best ghetto dialect. When I asked him if he meant Pentium, he strongly demanded to see his mispronounced computers. I informed him that we carried no such brand, but we did have Pentium computers. At that point, he told me I was baiting and switching, he knew exactly what he wanted, and was going to go get it at Circuit City, across the street.

Another good one was the elderly folks that decided they didn't need some of the files in thier windows folder, then couldn't figure out why the computer stopped working. Since Best Buy doesn't support any software issues (not covered under warranty or service plan) they were pretty much screwed, but we helped em out and restored their system, then strongly encouraged them to invest in some "Learn Win98" books.

Ahhh, the good ol days of dealing with the unwashed masses

jbuffett

Worst I had was a guy steal a CD player while I was watching and (try to) return it.

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I do blame you for voting for Bush.

jbuffett

I must admit though, my first thought was,
"I thought XP ran slow on MY machine."

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I do blame you for voting for Bush.