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Old 01-30-2006, 10:14 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Tie your shoelaces, you'll trip and break your neck...

or some priceless chinese vases...


Museum visitor trips, breaks Chinese vases

Quote:
CAMBRIDGE, England (AP) -- A museum visitor shattered three Qing dynasty Chinese vases when he tripped on his shoelace, stumbled down a stairway and brought the vases crashing to the floor, officials said Monday.

The three vases, dating from the late 17th or early 18th century, had been donated to The Fitzwilliam Museum in the university city of Cambridge in 1948, and were among its best-known artifacts. They had been sitting proudly on the window sill beside the staircase for 40 years.

"It was a most unfortunate and regrettable accident, but we are glad that the visitor involved was able to leave the museum unharmed," said Duncan Robinson, the Fitzwilliam's director.

The museum declined to identify the man who had tripped on a loose shoelace Wednesday.

Asked about the porcelain vases, Margaret Greeves, the museum's assistant director, said: "They are in very, very small pieces, but we are determined to put them back together."

The museum declined to say what the vases were worth.
This would totally be something i would do... only I'd probably break a bone in the process... Ever have a moment of clumsiness? Do share...
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Old 01-30-2006, 10:24 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Why does one put priceless Qing Dynasty vases...in a window sill? Is that the best venue that the Fitzwilliam Museum could come up with, for displaying priceless artifacts? Hell, I take better care of framed photographs.
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Old 01-30-2006, 10:43 AM   #3 (permalink)
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From how they describe it in the article, it seems like a terrible place for the vases. I would hope the story isn't fully describing the layout of the place where they were or something like that. Museums are usually pretty careful with things like that.

The only clutz story I can think of was when I reached for my cell phone and ended up dropping it onto a plate of spaghetti, breaking the phone, the plate, and sending spaghetti all over the beige carpet.

EDIT: Actually, I have another one... I tossed a used condom into a trash can and missed from a foot and a half away. That was more shocking than anything else, though. I mean, how do you thwart gravity from a foot and a half away?
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Last edited by Toaster126; 01-30-2006 at 10:46 AM..
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Old 01-30-2006, 10:49 AM   #4 (permalink)
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I've fallen down flights of stairs. I'm sure that's pretty common. But has anyone ever fallen up some stairs? I have. My minidisc player wasn't very happy about the fall. But at least it wasn't heavily damaged.
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Old 01-30-2006, 10:57 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Siege
But has anyone ever fallen up some stairs? I have. My minidisc player wasn't very happy about the fall. But at least it wasn't heavily damaged.
I've told the story here before - but I basically tripped up a flight of stairs while wearing a strapless dress... and in the tripping process, I stepped on the front of my dress pretty much yanking the front of it down.. and in my hands I wasn carrying a heavy crystal award... so i couln'dt drop the award to recover.. .defintely not one of my most graceful moments
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Old 01-30-2006, 11:50 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Why the hell wasn't the vase in a proper display? Anybody could have taken the damn thing and toss it around like a ball. But it just so happens that a man tripped and knocked the damn over. It ain't the man's fault, it's the museum's fault for inadequate protection of its artifacts
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Old 01-30-2006, 03:34 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I was chasing this road runner once on a high mountain-top road that was very curvy. Well, we reached a point where the road turned, but I was going too fast to make the turn and I ran right off the cliff. To top it off, the anvil I had set at the precipice of another cliff directly above us broke through the desert rock at the very same moment.

Definitely not one of my better moments.
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Old 01-30-2006, 03:37 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I've fallen up marble stairs in front of the entire dining room crowd at Flagler College, knocked the crap out of my heel swinging on a playground swing, had a hammer fall from the top of a 6' bookcase onto my head while sitting on the floor, almost broke my foot walking on it while it was asleep, broken every single toe on both feet except the big ones, and ran (literally) into a glass door one New Year's Eve after a bottle of champagne, promptly giving myself two black eyes.

But, I have never broken anything of value. Please keep your vases, jewels, priceless artifacts away from me. Thanks.


edit for my redneck grammar!
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Old 01-30-2006, 03:44 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Today I managed to close my car door on my leg while I was getting out. Don't ask me, I don't know how I accomplished this either.
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Old 01-30-2006, 04:26 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I'm a pretty clumsy person and I have many stories about running into doors, walls, and poles. I also have stories of falling off furniture and down stairs. I've hit my head on the top of the car while getting in many times. I always trip over 'cracks' in the sidewalk that only appear when they see me approach and I get my high heels stuck in grates. Grace is definitely not my middle name.

However, I've never broken anything but my ego. Well, I did tear my wedding dress when I tripped down the stairs at my wedding. That was a bummer.
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Old 01-30-2006, 04:30 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JumpinJesus
I was chasing this road runner once on a high mountain-top road that was very curvy. Well, we reached a point where the road turned, but I was going too fast to make the turn and I ran right off the cliff. To top it off, the anvil I had set at the precipice of another cliff directly above us broke through the desert rock at the very same moment.

Definitely not one of my better moments.
Sorry, can't resist it since my wonderful husband makes himself sounds like he's never had a clumsy moment and thinks he has to steal moments from cartoons ....

One time he was coming up the stairs after work. He tripped and fell up the last couple steps and was sprawled out on the floor with his computer bag on top of him. His books flew out across the room and he looked competely helpless and unable to stand up. I'm the horrible person who always laughs after seeing a person fall. So I just stood over him laughing unable to gather the strength to help him up. He didn't speak to me for awhile even with my apologies...of course, I probably should have not laughed everytime I thought of it and tried to apologize.

Love you babe
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Old 01-30-2006, 04:34 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Quote:
Asked about the porcelain vases, Margaret Greeves, the museum's assistant director, said: "They are in very, very small pieces, but we are determined to put them back together."
That's the spirit!
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Old 01-30-2006, 04:48 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shesus
I'm the horrible person who always laughs after seeing a person fall. So I just stood over him laughing unable to gather the strength to help him up. He didn't speak to me for awhile even with my apologies...of course, I probably should have not laughed everytime I thought of it and tried to apologize.
Yeah, that's me too. So I suppose I shouldn't mention that I laughed the entire time reading it and now the mental image is gonna have me going the rest of the night?
/me gives JJ a big hug

Seeing as how I manage to do something stupid at least once a day, I know the clutsy feeling well. Today for example I got my coat stuck in my car door as I was getting out to go to class. Not only did I get some good whiplash on the first step, I had to wiggle out of my coat in order to turn around and get it out.
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Old 01-30-2006, 05:43 PM   #14 (permalink)
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The hotel that hubby and I stayed at in Mexico had numerous stairs, and each set had a sign warning to "Watch Your Step!". I was sarcastically pointing this out to hubby, and then proceeded to trip up the remaining steps. After that, Hubby didn't fail to tease me whenever we encountered steps.

Totally sucks about the vases though....very unfortunate accident.
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Old 01-30-2006, 07:48 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Coppertop
Today I managed to close my car door on my leg while I was getting out. Don't ask me, I don't know how I accomplished this either.
Wow, when getting OUT? I've done it when getting in the car.
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Old 01-30-2006, 07:49 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
The museum declined to say what the vases were worth.
I just heard them say on the radio that they were worth £100,000.

As for clumsiness... if there's a hole in the ground, I'll be down it
faster than a shit-scared meerkat. But the funniest fall I can recall
seeing was when my mother and my sister-in-law were walking down
my aunt's path - just inside the gate, my mum tripped and as she went
flying, she reached out and grabbed my sister-in-law's skirt pulling it down
to her ankles. ..."Luckily" she wasn't going commando...
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Old 01-30-2006, 08:03 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maleficent
Ever have a moment of clumsiness? Do share...
I've had waaaay too many. Worst was probably the grinder incident. I was about 14 and grinding the paint off of the metal railings for the front stairs when the grinder skipped off of the rail and tore into one of my fingers, going nearly down to the bone. It's probably my favorite scar to show off since it's on the middle finger of my left hand.

Moral of this story: no matter how hot it is and how much they make your hands sweat, wear gloves while using a metal grinder.
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Old 01-31-2006, 10:37 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Slippery Slope
As for clumsiness... if there's a hole in the ground, I'll be down it
faster than a shit-scared meerkat....
I can't think of any funny stories at the moment, but this quote is freakin' hilarious!
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Old 01-31-2006, 10:46 AM   #19 (permalink)
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When my daughter was still a very little baby, I tripped while she was in my arms. Of course, I couldn't use my arms to stop the fall so I just pulled her close and tried to twist in the air... I landed very hard on my shoulder.

Adrenaline is a powerful substance.
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Old 01-31-2006, 12:06 PM   #20 (permalink)
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I'll suppose I can share a couple of stories...

This one ends victoriously, so I'll share it first...

When I was in high school one afternoon, I was in the halls for some reason during class. I was in a hurry, and as I was running down the stairs I turn the corner at the end of the flight to go down another and stepped on my shoelace just as I was about to begin going down the next flight.

Let me preface this part by saying that I am not a Ninja. Nor do I have any outstanding athletic or gymnastic ability - I doubt I could ever do it again. However, just this once, Karma was on my side...

It's a bit of a blur because it happened so fast, but as I began to fall face first off the top of the stairs I "pushed off" with my foot, keeping myself relatively perpendicular to the ground. It wasn't really controlled, though, and because I had done it while I was so off balance I began spinning. This wasn't a remarkably fast spin, but I was going fast enough I had no idea where my feet were going to land. To make a long story short, I somehow managed to stay on my feet, skipping steps two or three at a time, landing on them backwards, sideways, or with my feet on different stairs. I was certain that reality was going to come crashing down and I was going to land in a painful pile at the bottom of the stairs, but low and behold, I got to the bottom still on my feet. I looked up, and there was a teacher standing at the door directly across from the stairs, looking at me with an awestruck look. Both she and half the class sitting behind her had witnessed the event, and began to clap. I took a bow, and went on to wherever I was going...

This second story isn't so much about my clumsiness as it is just how unaware I was caught... I was younger, probably 12 or 13 when it happened...

It was early afternoon, and I was minding my own business crossing a relatively busy street that I had crossed a million times before - only this time, it was under construction. As I walked, I must have been daydreaming, but I was in for a rude awakening. I was roughly halfway across the street when suddenly I felt like I had tripped - but it wasn't like any tripping I had done before. I didn't feel my leg or foot hit anything, and I was falling straight down. I can't even begin to tell you how paniced and confused I felt at that moment. As I was swallowed up by the ground I scraped my leg pretty nastily. I fell approximately 10-12 feet, and landed on my feet/ass. Looking up, I see a circular circle of light cutting through the darkness around me. It suddenly dawned on my - I had fallen into the sewer. Immediately I jump up from the ground and imagine I'm covered in raw feces and I'm going to die of the most terrible infection. Upon closer inspection, I realize that I am, in fact, in a storm sewer, and raw sewage isn't a concern for me. Looking up, there is absolutely no way for me to get out of there - contrary to hollywood portrayal, not all sewers have ladders in them. I waited around for a bit, but apparently noone had seen me fall in. I spent the next hour or so wandering around in cramped, pitch black tunnels until I finally stumbled across a ladder. The worst of it, though, was that I could hear rodents near me but couldn't see anything in the pitch black. Although the manhole cover was heavy, I had so much adrenaline pumping through my body that I practically threw it off in my effort to get free. I got a couple of strange looks from people as I climbed out from the sewers, covered in filth. Fortunately, a younger guy took pity on my and helped me put the cover back over the hole - unfortunately, he smashed his finger while doing so.

Anyway, nowadays I keep my eye on the ground...
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Old 01-31-2006, 12:08 PM   #21 (permalink)
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I am a total and complete confirmed clutz.
A year and a month ago I fell down a flight of stairs brusing my butt so bad that I couldn't sit for a month and then later we discovered I'd caused myself a hernia that I had to have surgery for.
Then only in March of last year I tripped and fell on the last basement step going down. I broke my foot.
Growing up I constantly had bruises on my shins from running into footstools, chairs, trashcans, and falling UP the stairs in our house. I MOST often fell UP and not down. I was always dropping dishes and have broken dishes by just drying them. I have had MANY embarrassing incidents when in elementary school. Especially one in which my entire class saw my carebear panties and before the end of the week the whole school knew what kind I wore. I think the worst was when I knocked over and entire seed packet display dumping all the packets on the floor. Ended up with two store employees helping me to pick it up. At least it wasn't a million dollar vase.
That's good JJ or should I say W.E. Coyote?
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