sevens

Ok, so a friend of mine and I recently had a conversation about her sexuallity, or lack there of in fact, she was very worried that because she hasnt had very much experience and she hasn't been induced to orgasm by a guy yet, that shes falling behind and getting herself into some trouble. She asked me to...help her out, and so now were kind of on this mission to make her cum. She doesnt want to have sex but really wants to get fingered or oralled to orgasm, and like a good friend I'm there for her, but shes REALLY hard to get off. Anyone have any tips or tricks for getting a sexually young girl off, her pussy is also very very tight, and she said it hurt a little bit when I put one finger in, just so you guys can keep that in mind. anyway, any help is appreciated

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Averett

That's really sad It's sad that she thinks she's falling behind because she's lacking sexual experience. It's sad that she's come to you to simply fullfil this need.

I'm not knocking you, or her really. I just find it really sad that this is happening, and I'm sure this isn't the only case. Hell, theres a thread about a guy wanting to hire a prostitute just so he can have sex. What's the damn rush? What happened to us all that everyone is in such a rush to have this experience? Is it peer presure?

Oh hell... Sorry for the soap box rant. I just don't get it.

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HomerSimpson

when you touching things, ask her weather she likes it or not.
with her being that tight, has she had sex yet? i would go for the clit and work a finger in when she is wet and ready.

maleficent

How old is thie 'young girl'?

I'm with Averett, this is just sad that she thinks she's falling behind in something...

But here's some advice. Every person is responsible for their own orgasms, you absolutely cannot rely on someone else to "get you off". If you can't figure out how to do it for yourself, then you can't possibly expect someone else to do it for you.

Suggest she check out a copy of Our Bodies, Our Selves from the library and read it.

She shouldn't be rushing into something she's clearly not ready for.

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sailor98

Is she able to orgasm when masturbating? She needs to tell you what feels good--or better yet--show you. If she can't bring herself off I would recommend a medical consult to eliminate any physical cause that might be interfering. Otherwise, it's just a fact that for some women orgasm is hard.

combatmedicjen

If it hurts for her to have just one finger in, I doubt it's because she's "so tight." It's more than likely she's extraordinarily tense. I think she reason she's not getting off with you, or anybody, is because she's so worried about "falling behind" that she's trying way too hard to speed up her sexual maturation and is ultimately denying herself any semblance of a good sexual experience. She needs to explore herself and then, when she's comfortable with her own body, she needs to find someone that doesn't make her feel as tense as you do. And she needs to know that it's not a bad thing to "fall behind." Different people mature sexually in different ways at different times... rushing into a sexual relationship because she thinks she's "behind" won't help the situation at all, and might even hurt her sexually. Get the poor girl a vibrator and tell her to get back to you when she's explored every inch of herself and knows what she wants to get out of sex.

kutulu

She's tight because she's nervous. You need to loosen her up by starting slowly. Start by giving her a full body massage for about 20-30 min. After that, rub her breasts and kiss/lick her neck and ear lobes. Slowly move down and start to rub her outer lips (get her oiled up). As that progresses, rub a finger slowly up and down in between her lips (but not so much that you are about to enter her). Then make slow circling motions around her clit while you softly lick her neck/ears/breasts. Repeat what you did, only now use you tongue.

The thing about us guys is that we are all about penetration and firm contact. You should be able to make a girl come without sticking anything inside her. It's all about the clit but you have to be careful not to apply too much pressure (at least as they are getting warmed up).

maleficent

This suggestion bothers me only because he hasn't described his friend as a girlfriend, or that they have a romantic relationship. More that they're buddies....

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Suave

Well if he can't do the body massage and all that because they're just friends, hook her up to some nitrous oxide for a couple minutes, then go to it.

denim

If they're friends enough for her to ask this favor of him, it seems to me she shouldn't have too much of a problem with him suggesting a massage to help her relax. That's IFF she's at least 18. If she's not of age, he should leave her alone.

I've found in the past that a good back massage can help relax a person.

kutulu

True, but at the same time she's having major issues that are tensing her up. I know kissing can be so much more intimate than sex but she needs to be turned on for it all to work. Maybe I'm overgeneralizing it but women aren't as mechanical as men are with orgasming. All I really need to cum is to have my wife perform repeated motions for an extended period of time, she needs more than just motions.

He makes it sound like she just gets naked and starts fingering her. That isn't going to do it.

absorbentishe

Wow, I can't imagine going to a friend and saying that I've never gotten off, can you help me? Hopefully this isn't the morales of today's youth. I had friends (girls) that I would have loved to do things to, but we were friends god sake.

kutulu

Totally. When I was younger I would have loved to have friends like that.

sevens

ok, well I obviously didn't do my job in fully explaining everything so let me try and clear some water.
First, yes she is of age
yes, she has gotten herself off before
no she hasnt had sex
actually, we did start with a massage, and then the slow kissing, and the neck nibbling, then with the gentle teasing of the outer lips, and she was wet enough when I went inside her, she actually told me that it didnt hurt at the biggining, only after she told me to speed up, and then only after a few minutes.
In response to how it came about, she was talking to me about her relationships and especially the sexuality portion of them, she said that she was worried because the guys couldn't get her off because it hurt her too much, but that she didn't want to tell them that and sound, "ungrateful" I think was the word she used, so she just took the pain and faked an orgasm, I told her that was no good, and she should by no means do that because it doesn't help anyone and is unhealthy (IMO). then she brought up how she wished she could practice and loosen up and see what it was that she wanted and like and needed from a guy for him to get her off. She wanted to be more comfortable and able to talk to her partner, who ever it was, but she was shy and didnt know how to go about it, thats when she asked me to help her out. We're good friends and I said ok. thats kind of how it came about. Maybe that will help clear some things up maybe not, just keep writing, I apreciate it all. thanks

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Ofirethorn

Okay start with a surface "massager" for stimmulation and work it closer, and see how she responds they are like 10 bucks at wal mart and in no way look sexual.

Rlyss

Are you certain she's not emotionally interested in you? From what you've written I don't think she is, but perhaps it's something to keep in mind. Maybe she likes you?

Perhaps a bit off the mark.

I'm surprised at this situation. I don't think there's anything necessarily wrong with it, but I've never been in a situation where I'm <i>that</i> comfortable with a friend. Even if you do somehow figure out how to make her come by fingering her, it won't be the same when she's with another man and actually having sex with him. It'll be different then, and she'll be back at square one, and won't know what to do but grin and bear it and fake an orgasm to get the man off her.

If she wants to be comfortable with her body, and with sex, enough to have an orgasm, then in my (limited) opinion, she doesn't need a friend to finger her, and she doesn't need to lie to a man that she's with. What she needs is a steady boyfriend, who she's emotionally and sexually attached to, who can assure her that there's no rush, and who can help her through this as a partner.

doubledragon83

I think its funny that half of the posts in this forum have the "why would you do such a thing" aura about them.

waltert

try and help her out anyway you can, be slow, set a nice mood if you can (candles, etc). I guess for it to be any good for her, you have to train yourself to be in tune with her. have her get off in front of you, so you can see what she does to make things work. really, its going to be harder if things are awkward between you two.

look her in the eyes while you're doing it.

MSD

I'm not sure how someone who's having problems based on sexually insecurity in relation ships is going to become less inhibited and less insecure by getting help from someone she isn't emotionally attached to. It would make more sense for her to take it slow and try to get everything working with someone she's in love with. Anyone worth being in a relationship with would understand the situation and try to help her. I'm not saying that you shouldn't help, just that she migh tbe looking in the wrong place. Sexually inhibited or insecure people need someone who they can open up to, not just a friend/fuck buddy.

TheFu

I think in the long run you're going to mess up a good friendship. Yeah it is great that she's come to you for help "getting off." But for the reasons said here I think you're the wrong person to do this. It should be for a lover. Maybe she's in love with you and that is why she approached you but if you are just friends, I don't see how this will be healthy for your friendship.