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If it hurts for her to have just one finger in, I doubt it's because she's "so tight." It's more than likely she's extraordinarily tense. I think she reason she's not getting off with you, or anybody, is because she's so worried about "falling behind" that she's trying way too hard to speed up her sexual maturation and is ultimately denying herself any semblance of a good sexual experience. She needs to explore herself and then, when she's comfortable with her own body, she needs to find someone that doesn't make her feel as tense as you do. And she needs to know that it's not a bad thing to "fall behind." Different people mature sexually in different ways at different times... rushing into a sexual relationship because she thinks she's "behind" won't help the situation at all, and might even hurt her sexually. Get the poor girl a vibrator and tell her to get back to you when she's explored every inch of herself and knows what she wants to get out of sex.
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