supersix2

Ok so I'm a freshman in college and I'm still a virgin big deal. I don't really care at all. I'm happy with my life. I don't feel the need to screw it up by making bad decisions about sex. Besides, there have only been 2 girls so far that I could think about being that close with. Its not that I'm picky, I find many girls attractive, but I really want much more than just meaningless sex. That doesn't get me excited.
Anyway, the whole story is there are a lot of idiots on my floor that give me shit for it and they think that I care so much about having sex, when in reality I don't so much. These people are more screwed up than most people I've ever met. This one girl can't go 2 days without having sex. She gets depressed otherwise. This other girl is in a screwed up relationship with a guy that treats her like garbage. He always degrades her in front of his guy friends, including me, but he's always really nice to her. I try to tell her but she doesn't care as long as she is getting action. Then there is my roommate who will do just about anything with a vagina. It really bothers me, but I keep quiet about it because its not really my problem.
Anyway, I was wondering if anyone else had problems like this just because they have certain standards.

Neato

Reading that was almost like reading something written about myself. Only differences are that there's only been one girl who I could think about getting that close with...
And the other one is after a day of living in a dorm exactly like what you described I moved to a new dorm and got a single. I live by myself and I live around people who live alone as well.

On the second day (the day I went home for a few days, only to come back and move) my room mate put in a porn and left the room. I was playing Halo on my XBOX and couldn't help but think "What the fuck? You dumbass! What, do you think you are funny?" and about 20 minutes later I just decided that I needed a break from the stupidity that the dorm was spouting. So while my roommate was gone, on the ladies floor of the dorm scoping out chicks ( I had declined to go along because I don't care about chicks) I left.
One guy would say "That's titties." in place of "That's cool." What an anoying thing to hear.

So really, the only difference between us in this area is that I decided to get the hell away from the idiots. But, I would say I am very different from many of them in other areas as well. They treated me the same way about getting drunk and smoking pot too.

tritium

We are in an age group, surrounded by individuals that are still seeking out what their true sexual identity is. They, therefore, feel that it is necessary to put on a show of their comparitively "superior" sexuality in order to compensate for their own insecurities. I've seen it a thousand times where men, in particular, but on aires of Don Juan promescuity to disguise their own, usually unfounded, fears of homosexuality within themselves. These individuals generally see the error in their own ways in a few years, usually after securing their own sexual identity and losing the preprogrammed television machismo. Don't sweat it, supersix, there are plenty of other people (including women) that are looking at life in the same fashion as yourself. I'd hazard a guess to say that you are, in fact, more MATURE then your age-group peers and not lacking, in any fashion, of sexual drive. Let things happen naturally and brush aside the assertions and actions of your hall mates. They are forcing their overt heterosexuality on you in an attempt to gel their own opinions.

__________________
Blah.

analog

Good for you. Fuck the people who give you shit about your virginity. I applaud you for your choice to abstain, based on a lack of true love- how admirable! How many people can say they want to wait just because they don't feel right having random sex?

On the other side of the coin, there are those of us who see sex as a wonderful part of our lives, and (without being crazy as in the girl who goes depressed after 2 dry days) we embrace our own sexuality by expressing it with another. We enjoy sex. Just because it's random doesn't necessarily mean it's dirty, because we are all sexual creatures and different people act out that facet of our personalities in a different way- some abstain and wait for love, and some feel that a sex with different people is perfectly fine, because we all do what makes us happy.

It sounds like you have nothing but the absolute worst possible scenarios of people you associate with... they all seem to be at the very worst end of the spectrum. Just be safe, and do what you want to do. Don't let those assholes get you down, you sound like you've got a great life ahead of you. Best of luck.

Wise1010

I'm with you on that. I've only been with one girl and I'll be turning 20 in a few months. I'm a sophomore in college and have went through all that as well. I don't drink or do any of the drugs. Have always had a strong will to stay away from that crap. It's all pointless in the end. Sure you have a good time now, but will you be having a good time later down the road? More than likely, NO! Don't listen to what those guys have to say, deep down they wish they could be like you. There's not many guys out there like ourselves in which we don't have to be involved in that stuff to have a good time. Be proud of who you are and just do your best to avoid those that will try to bring you down! The girls will eventually calm themselves down as well and realize they want to be with a man that can actually control themselves and respect their girl. No rush on anything

__________________
"Faith is believing in something when common sense tells you not to!"

WarWagon

While they're all running around with STD's, you'll end up with some super-sweet good gorgeous girl, and they'll all end up jealous anyways. But really, who cares? Kudos to you, because you obviously are vastly more mature than your counterparts.

empu

Hmm. It sounds like you do care. Figure out why.

jay-g

Just the way humans and guys are, they wish they could hook up with every attractive girl they see. Some guys just think that and others act on it. Its like you either are born with the "player" attitude or the meaningful sex attitude. For me, I am also like you on this subject. I want it to be meaningful everytime. I just dont have that player, rico suave mind set. In the end, I dont think I am right or wrong on this issue. What I do, doesnt make it the right just because I think it is. Whatever floats your boat. Supersix just stay yourself and enjoy the college life.

GoldenOuroboros

MAAATE! Screw 'em all and wait.. best thing you can do... well up to you really.. Make your own decision and live by it

I used to get crap about still having my 'V' plates at school.. SO WHAT?! I waited and had the best time ever with the right girl who is now my loving fiancee

__________________
Can you see me grin grin grrriiiiinnnning?!

Jesus Pimp

There is also meaningful sex when you meet that special girl. Experience is always good.

__________________
Never date anyone who doesn't make your dick hard.

Averett

Damn straight. I myself was a virgin until I was a senior in college. Just turned 22. I didn't get any shit for it, but I'm sure it is much different for a guy. Looking back nearly 4 years later I don't regret a thing. Sure, I probably could have had sex much earlier with somebody that I didn't care about. But that wasn't right for me.

Since then I've grown a lot and view things differently. I've made the choice to have sex with somebody who I didn't love, and who didn't love me and it was fine. I've also decided not to get into a "fuck buddy" situation because I know I couldn't handle it.

You've gotta do whats right with you. I know it's not easy to do that sometimes, but in the end you'll be glad that you didn't fuck the drunk girl after that party you went to.

__________________
Absence is to love what wind is to fire. It extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.

ratbastid

Just imagine the 10-year reunion, when you've got a wonderful, brilliant, gorgeous girl on your arm, to whom you've been blissfully married for a number of years, and they're still a pack of drooling squish-heads.

Conclamo Ludus

I agree. If you don't really care, then you wouldn't be upset about them giving you shit. When you get comfortable with why it bothers you, then next time people are giving you shit about it you'll be able to laugh it off without thinking twice about it.

If you were comfortble about what they were giving you shit about, then you would know that it is their problem, not yours, therefore you don't have to worry about it.

__________________
Lord, have mercy on my wicked soul
I wouldn't mistreat you baby, for my weight in gold.
-Son House, Death Letter Blues

kel

Don't ever ever let people talking shit about you bother you. If you are confident in your decisions it will show and people respect that now matter how fucked up they may be.

The right time to lose your virginity is when you feel it is the right time. Not when other people say it is.

__________________
"It better be funny"

vveronica

I know how their crap can bother you... You made a choice that you believe is right for you... Prolly find your GPA is higher than theirs... now if you want to releave the pressure let me know....hehehehehehhehehehe

__________________
...We find ourselves in a struggle for our very right to exsist... We will not go quietly into the night... We will not give up without a fight...

Conclamo Ludus

To add what I said earlier, there is no reason to be defensive about it. The big V is not a burden. For me it lasted well until I was 20. I commend you for your ability to have standards, but you have to tolerate them being intolerant. That's the burden of toleration. You'll be the stronger, wiser, individual once you get a hold of the fact that your standards are for you only. It doesn't amount to a hill of beans what the others think, what they think has nothing to do with you.

__________________
Lord, have mercy on my wicked soul
I wouldn't mistreat you baby, for my weight in gold.
-Son House, Death Letter Blues

Averett

Hey veronica, we get it. You love sex! You have sex a lot! You'd like to have sex with everyone who posts here!

I'm sure he's heard that from girls before. "hey baby, I'll train you." Blah.

__________________
Absence is to love what wind is to fire. It extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.

Lizziethedragon

supersix2

No I'm not definsive about it. I just find it annoying how they taunt me. I try to be tolerant of other people's decisions. Although I may disapprove of what they are doing I don't taunt them about it. I'm mad because I'm not being shown the same respect I give them. Thats what bothers me. Another thing that bothers me is when I try to give other people advice about how to treat women and about relationships and such. They tell me that I have no idea what I am talking about because I'm still a virgin and whatnot. I've still had relationships with girls, maybe not very serious, but I know how to treat them and I'm just trying to help out other people. I don't like when my help isn't appreciated.
I don't see virginity as a sacred thing either. My priorities are on other things right now like learning as much as I can about everything and anything. I haven't really found any girl that I wouldn't mind spending a lot of time with. I don't like using people so I don't want to lie to girls just to get them in bed. I'm sure there are people out there that don't mind things like this and as long as they are happy I don't really care.
The only thing that does bother/worry me is since I don't really have much experience I'm worried, almost scared of when the time comes. I think that's one of the reasons why I don't really try to get girls. I just read a post on this forum about dry humping and I don't want to be the guy that does that. Blah I worry too much.

motdakasha

Stick to your guns, man. Don't let them get to you.

__________________
=^-^= motdakasha =^-^=
Just Google It.
BA Psychology & Photography
(I'm not going psychoanalyze you nor will I let you cry on my shoulder. Have a nice day.)

Bloodslick

supersix2, you should ask them about their past relationships and learn more about them.

When they give you shit about being a virgin, you will then be able to ask them if they remember (insert name of girl they regret sleeping with), and point out to them that you don't have any of those. They will promptly shut the fuck up. That's what I did through most of high school, until I joined the ranks of the sexually active.

Averett

If a girl really cares about you, she won't be put of by the fact that you aren't experienced. If she's had experience before, she'll help you along. If not, you'll learn together.

And that dry humping thread is a joke if you ask me. People blew it way outta proportion.

Maybe you do worry a bit too much. But ahh.... don't worry about it.

__________________
Absence is to love what wind is to fire. It extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.

diddagirl

I know it can get sooo very annoying when people harass you about it. People I know...like to throw the fact that I am a V into almost anthing we are talking about. If they are having a sex talk......they always look at me, ad say "ohh dont worry Melissa..... you'll do it one day" Yes! I friggen realize I will do it oneday... I can handle talking about sex with you all, and I am a v because I choose to be. I think they are the ones that need to get over it, and dealwith the fact that some people chose to wait for someone they love.

__________________
"Is it so small a thing to have enjoyed the sun, to have lived long in the spring, to have loved, to have thought, to have done."
-Matthew Arnold

oberon

I'm a senior in college and still haven't slept with anybody.

It doesn't bother me, and no one gives me shit about it. After all, it's not any of their damn business.

So if you feel any pressure... fuck 'em. I'm with analog and Averett here.

__________________
"There are finer fish in the sea than have ever been caught." -- Irish proverb