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11-18-2003, 05:41 AM
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#1 (permalink) |
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The Original JizzSmacka
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Do girls usually date quickly after a breakup?
It's only been a month since we broke up but she's already dating someone. Why do they do this? Do they give a shit about you anymore?
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Never date anyone who doesn't make your dick hard. |
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11-18-2003, 06:23 AM
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#3 (permalink) |
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Pup no More
Location: Voted the Best
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Everyone takes a break up differently - It all depends on how they can handle it. I don't know your situation, but it sounds as if you still want to get back with her; if that is the case you have to deal with it - you have no say in her life.
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"If you cannot lift the load off another's back, do not walk away. Try to lighten it." ~ Frank Tyger |
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11-18-2003, 07:03 AM
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#4 (permalink) |
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Psycho
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Breakups are different for everyone-- it cannot be said often enough. However, in direct violation of my opening statement here are some gross generalizations
If the breakup was because one or the other of you wanted out and the other did not then she's either dating the main reason she wanted out or trying to make up for the fact that she did not want the relationship to end. If the former is true then you now know why she wanted to break up and should try to get back in the saddle knowing that it is over. If the latter is true, and you are the one who wanted to break it off, why are you still pining after her? If the breakup was "Mutual" then she is doing what she should be doing -- moving on. You should too. |
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11-18-2003, 08:03 AM
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#7 (permalink) |
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Is In Love
Location: I'm workin' on it
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Comes from personal experience. My ex-boyfriend decided to date (fuck) another girl while I was still with him. Now, he got away with it because he was still in college in Viriginia while I had moved back home to New York. Anyway, when he came up to visit me for New Years (I paid for his ticket) he planned to break up with me....
Long story short, we got in a car wreck and the day I got out of the hospital he broke up with me. I was of course crushed. I didnt find out until months later that he had cheated on me. I'm glad it took that long to find out because if I had found out right away I would have been a serious mess. Oh well, live and learn. Jesus Pimp, I'm sure she isn't dating somebody else to make you angry. I hope not anyway. I really have no advice to give though. And off topic... Guys, if you're going to break up with your long distance girlfriend, just do it over the phone. Don't let her buy you a ticket to visit when you plan all along to break up with her.
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Absence is to love what wind is to fire. It extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great. Last edited by Averett; 11-18-2003 at 08:05 AM.. |
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11-18-2003, 08:26 AM
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#8 (permalink) |
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Addict
Location: STL, MO
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depends on the girl and length of the relationship. some girls need comfort to get over the previous relationship but those usually turn into the worst couples and can just turn into a cycle. I know a number of girls that are that way. It just depends on the person I guess....
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"Saints need sinners." Alan Watts |
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11-18-2003, 08:54 AM
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#9 (permalink) |
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Loser
Location: a darkened back alley
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Why are you worried about someone that you're not involved with? Since you're not involved, there's no good, legitimate answer to this question. Face facts: you're not involved. How much interest do you see her taking in your life these days?
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11-18-2003, 09:03 AM
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#10 (permalink) |
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Eh?
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
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I know where you're coming from man, all girls are different, and by your language, this girl obviously meant something to you. Perhaps you should talk to her, if you want her back in your life. Otherwise, i would say stop talking to her, and most of all, stop caring about what she does.
Yes its hard, but you have to face facts, and do it. You'll fidn someone else, it might take awhile, took me a little over ten months to find someone after losing 2 years to a girl...but eventually you'll get over her... Just look to the future and dont worry about her, especially if shes already dating again |
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11-18-2003, 09:09 AM
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#11 (permalink) |
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Psycho
Location: northern california
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So i guess the question is.. what is the appropriate time of pining and sorrow before dating... I'd say couple-three days...
__________________
...We find ourselves in a struggle for our very right to exsist... We will not go quietly into the night... We will not give up without a fight... |
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11-18-2003, 09:13 AM
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#12 (permalink) | |
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Loser
Location: a darkened back alley
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Quote:
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11-18-2003, 09:19 AM
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#13 (permalink) |
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Psycho
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I reading through the responses, a lot of the advice (including my own) seems harsh.
I think that's a good thing. There are two relationships in my past that I invested a lot of time and effort in, and when they ended I spent weeks trying to figure out why they didn't work out and thinking that I had wasted years of my life by being with the wrong person. What I know now is that those relationships taught me a great deal about what I did and did not want and/or need from a relationship. By the time the second big one was over I was determined to be in a relationship only as long as I needed to decide whether it was going where I wanted it to go. I quickly went through four or five "semi-serious" relationships in the last couple of years of college until I met the woman who's now my wife. Treat these things as lessons learned and move on. |
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11-18-2003, 11:37 PM
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#14 (permalink) | |
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Über-Rookie
Location: No longer, D.C
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Quote:
i agree though, if a person you think you will break up with plans to buy your something that large, break up with her before she has the chance.... (use he/him where appropriate) |
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11-19-2003, 05:58 AM
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#15 (permalink) |
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~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Location: Charleston, SC
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My personal experience has been this....
YES I date someone almost right away afterwards. What good is it sitting around thinking about someone you used to be with who you can't have?? Move on with your life. I was in a six year relationship and started dating my current boyfriend a month and a half later. Everyone was telling me it was to soon. But it sure as hell helped me get over the other guy and I was lucky enough to find the man I was REALLY meant to be with. |
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11-19-2003, 01:31 PM
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#17 (permalink) |
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Psycho
Location: that place with the thing
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Signor (Jesus) Pimp, I know where you're coming from, bro.
It's been a little more than a month and a half since I broke up with my ex, and she's already in another relationship. Sad thing is, I broke up with her 'cause she was waaaay to needy and dependent. I guess she proved my point. No worries, man. They don't do it to hurt us (well, generally they dont), but rather to move on. As you should be doing...
__________________
I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons. I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and voice of reason. I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices, son. They're one and the same I must isolate you, isolate and save you from yourself." - A Perfect Circle |
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11-19-2003, 01:58 PM
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#18 (permalink) |
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Crazy
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yep, 1 month after breaking up with my lass of 5 yrs she was dating another guy. i was sure it was just to spite me, and was confirmed when she had her leaving do (we are still friends) and when i snogged another girl she broke down in tears in front of her new boyfriend.... ouch.
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11-19-2003, 02:06 PM
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#19 (permalink) |
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* * *
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My girlfriend broke up with me because she said she can't handle commitment... I have a strong feeling that she's looking for meaningless sexual relationships, if she hasn't already found one. Nothing I can do about it... except try to get my poems back (grrr).
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Innominate. |
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11-19-2003, 04:17 PM
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#20 (permalink) |
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Upright
Location: Orange
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not to be the evil girl, but i date very quickly after a brek-up. I ususally do the dumping but that doesn't really matter. Most the time people get bored way before the have the nerve to break things off. I just realize that if i just lay around and not date it doesn't make anything better. Plus i have issues with "love" and i like to have sex so what am gonna do...
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11-19-2003, 10:24 PM
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#23 (permalink) |
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Hiya Puddin'! Miss me?
Location: Silicon Valley, CA
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Everybody deals with breakups differently.
__________________
=^-^= motdakasha =^-^= Just Google It. BA Psychology & Photography (I'm not going psychoanalyze you nor will I let you cry on my shoulder. Have a nice day.) |
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11-20-2003, 04:18 AM
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#24 (permalink) |
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Upright
Location: Florida
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I'm a girl that was broken up with about a month ago, I've been dating 2 guys 3 weeks into the breakup, but it is mostly a distraction thing. Tired of being depressed and lonely. Don't want to persue a relationship with them as I am very scared to jump back into one yet, its just good company, a way to bring my self-esteem back up. I love my ex more than anyone and miss him terribly still though.
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11-21-2003, 08:26 PM
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#26 (permalink) |
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Junkie
Location: Fort Worth, TX
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Ok, this isn't all girls. This is girls who DO date immediately after a breakup, those that stay crushed are very different indeed.
Girls who date immediately after a breakup almost never have any interest in the guys. They tend to have lots of little dates with many different guys. The main reasons I have found are as follows: 1) They want to re-assert their sexual power. They are attractive and they simply use these men for free drinks/dinner/movies just to convince themselves they can do this again. If not it's an excuse to get out of the house. 2) Because they are single again, plain and simple, they can. Dont worry about it, the first 3-6 men they go out with mean nothing to them. During this grace period they are actually thinking of YOU on the dates. If you want her back this is the time, if not you should care less. About the 4-6th man is the one who actually sparks her interest. By then she has gotten over you and see's him as an actual person, not you or some "guy". |
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12-02-2003, 07:58 PM
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#29 (permalink) |
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Addict
Location: Boone, NC
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if your ex is already dating someone, then she probably doesn't like being alone. Sometimes women date soon after a break up so they can get revenge or attention.
Women are different. All we can do is cope with the situation at hand the best way we know how.
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"the greatest trick the devil ever pulled, was making the world believe he didn't exist" -Kevin Spacey 'The Usual Suspects' |
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12-03-2003, 05:28 AM
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#30 (permalink) |
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Insane
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My ex-girlfriend, who was with me for 5 years, got married 6months after we called it off. We were so happy living together. Then she started wondering why she wasn't married yet while her friends were all supposedly happily married. Anyhoo, to make a long story short, we broke off, I was a mess and she married the first guy that was nice to her.
So, she has been married for a while and I am now happy but it was still a very weird six months. Six Months....Wow!
__________________
Life's jounney is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn-out shouting, "Holy sh*t! What a ride!" - unknown 
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| Tags |
| breakup, date, girls, quickly |
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