robot_parade

I guess I don't really have a specific question or insightful observation here. There's an attractive girl at work, equipped with a rather impressive set of boobs. She has a tendency to wear outfits that display a fair amount of cleavage - not complete exposure all the time or anything, but enough so that during a normal interaction there's going to be plenty of opportunity for some eye candy. I wonder about a few things.

How much looking is acceptable or appropriate? There's obviously a line to be crossed here - leering, staring, or sexual comments are clearly over the line...but how much is too much? Should people try to completely avoid looking at the area? Is occasional appreciation socially 'ok'? From my perspective as a hetero guy with a boob fetish, only a great force of would allow me to never look at the cleavage. I could probably manage it though, if I thought it was important enough.

What about from the lady's perspective? I mean, obviously she has to know what she's showing off - pretty much everything she wears has these properties, and there are plenty of women with equally impressive breasts who don't show any cleavage at work. Is she choosing the outfits simply because they look nice, she's comfortable with her body, and doesn't mind a little cleavage showing? Her clothes do look nice - she dresses professionally (unless you consider showing cleavage unprofessional) in a decidedly feminine way. The clothes she wears don't strike me as overly sexual or revealing aside from the cleavage showing. Her attitude is 100% professional, but relaxed. She doesn't flirt seriously with me or with anyone else that I've noticed, so I don't think she's trying to sexualize the office environment, or use her sexuality in an inappropriate way.

I would think that if she didn't want people to notice and appreciate, she would make different clothing choices. But at the same time, I don't think she's looking for her male coworkers to hit on her, or to use her body to get any kind of advantages or favors. My best guess is that she thinks that boobs are neat, hers are spectacular, and she's happy to show them off a little bit, and doesn't mind people appreciating the cleavage; but she's a professional, and expects other people to act professionally.

She is, incidentally, pretty good at her job, and has a boyfriend (he looks like he'd fit right in at 'hot chicks with douchebags', but that's another matter entirely).

What do you think? Cleavage appreciation good? At work? Should she cover the cleavage up at work?

In a similar vein, there's another girl I interact with occasionally at work that has 'large' boobs, who wears those stretchy tight-fitting tops every single day. No cleavage, but definite eye-candy. Again, can't be an accident, and afaict the situation is the same. There are also plenty of other attractive women at my office, of course, and plenty of legs on display, etc. I'm a breast man, so...

To be clear, by 'appreciation', I mean enjoying, with occasional glances lasting less than a second each.

Oh, and another question - do you think she notices occasional glances of appreciation? Do you think she minds them?

Plan9

I love women plus sex and boobs and all that... but not at work. Knock that shit off. You're tired of being a sex object? Stop dressing like one at work.

I don't think it is appropriate to parade around the Grand Canyon at work. It'd be like me wearing some tight-fitting Express pants that really slam-bang-wow accentuated my smoothspot. I'm a Generic Human when I'm at work. I leave my dick and the related agenda at home.

It's unprofessional to use those gigundo butterhogs to your advantage in an office environment, ladies. We all look, you know we all look.

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Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Punk.of.Ages

It's just cleavage...

Obviously she doesn't mind the looks. If she did, she'd cover them.

Take a good look and move on.

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"The fact is that censorship always defeats its own purpose, for it creates, in the end, the kind of society that is incapable of exercising real discretion..." - Henry Steel Commager

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Xerxys

HA!

This is the 21st century and women no longer need to be "protected" against sexist godless misogynistic pigs such as all men that walk the earth.

That said she does want you to notice and may the force be with you if you ever do.

Depending on the situation, how serious is it? Either way ...

Willravel

If you work at a mortuary, it's probably not appropriate. Otherwise, enjoy.

Plan9

Or as an educator.
Or as a medical professional.
Or as a law enforcement officer.
Or as anybody that has self-respect and expects to be taken seriously.

...

What porno-reality do you live in where cleavage is equated to dignified women?

Oh, I sense a rant coming on... I can feel it building like intestinal pain from a protein shake.

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Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Willravel

I can respect a woman whether her breasts are under a dozen layers of sweaters or are on display.

Teacher, nurse, cop... these are all common common careers in porn. Coincidence?

Plan9

Respect is one thing. Working with someone is another.

...

Yeah, we put them in our fantasies because the reality hovers between boring and brutal.

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Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Martian

I don't see the cleavage itself as being an issue. It's more to do with the attire. If the top is office-appropriate, then I don't see the problem with it showing off the boobage a bit.

Illustration:



Classy, workplace appropriate dress that also happens to be slightly low cut.

Martian says:

They're boobs. Get over it.

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I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame

Tully Mars

Well coverage the cleavage I say. And what's with all these ankle showing dresses? Lets end that too. Maybe the Muslim's have this right right, burkas would solve all this craziness. Then everyone unable to get over the fact that chicks have breasts could get back to blaming something or someone else for their lack of concentration at work.

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Gabbyness

Martian, you prevented me from having to say, "pics or it didn't happen" on this thread.

You delivered.

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Baraka_Guru

It's a double standard. In many professional environments, men are expected to cover everything but their hands and heads. The exception is in more casual environments, where baring the forearms isn't so risque.

Women? Even in many professional environments it is acceptable to show some leg, some shoulder, arms, some neck line, some cleavage, all depending on the environment.

But it's because they're women, right? They're supposed to be looked at and lusted after. We've been doing it for centuries.

Then you have women who always dress with the same standard as men: pants suits, or whatever. But they run the danger of being perceived as "conservative" or "ball crushers."

It's like in politics how we often talk about what female politicians are wearing, and how they're doing their hair. Not men.

Odd.

Bottom line: If you have cleavage, you're inviting people to look at your tits. I'm sure most know that. Those who don't, should really think about it.

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Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

little_tippler

I don't really think about it, but as a measure of protection from unwanted attention, I guess I don't show it at work generally.

If it's too obvious then clearly the woman is wanting some form of attention because as has been said in this thread, it's kind of inevitable.

The only time I am more likely to show a little more leg, arm, cleavage whatever, is on opening nights at the gallery (because I dress up a little), or in summer when the heat is impossible. Otherwise I am pretty covered up.

Just wearing a skirt to work is enough to get me unwanted attention from co-workers and even clients. Men in Portugal are not bashful about looking and complimenting.

Just want to add that sometimes it's nice to feel feminine, even when we know it might get unwanted attention too.

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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

Lucifer

hsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!

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1123, 6536, 5321

kel

Just don't get caught

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wooÐs

When dressing for work or going out, I wear what looks best on me. And v-necks rank way high over scoopnecks or crewnecks and especially turtlenecks. I have very broad shoulders. So v-necks tone them down considerably. Regarding the amount of cleavage shown, it depends. But I no doubt save the 'omg-I-can't-bend-over' shirts for more casual settings. If anything is shown at work, it's minimal.

I feel the image in Martian's post is more for a summer evening date over work. But I worked in banking most recently. : shrug:

Plan9

Oh, you're all over it, brother.

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Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

snowy

So long as you don't give yourself away by following her cleavage with your eyes, or looking at her cleavage when you should be looking at her face, enjoy. I figure that's what it's there for.

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PonyPotato

I agree with that observation. A halter dress? At work? Are you kidding me? Especially with "spaghetti" straps. Even sleeveless for me at work seems like a no, though many of the older women at my last place of employment would wear sleeveless shirts with skirts or sleeveless dresses. No one, however, wore spaghetti straps nor halter shirts to WORK.

In terms of my own work-dress habits, I tend to wear some v-necks or scoop neck shirts, but since I don't have much cleavage to speak of, it's not a big deal. If I know a shirt is going to be pretty low-cut, I wear a tank top under it to cover up a bit more. Dresses or skirts are just-above-knee-length or longer, and if not sleeved are worn with a cardigan or suit jacket.

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Plan9

Martian, there is no friggin' way that dress is appropriate business attire.

Not a hard and fast rule, but business attire usually involves a bra, right?

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Baraka_Guru

Yeah, does the "workplace" happen to be in a "promo" environment?

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

wooÐs

Heh.
Bet that girl never intended for her pic to be used here.

Plan9

She's got great boobs, though.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

wooÐs

Look how she's pinching her arm like she's nervous.

Plan9

Yeah, and she's got cheeks like a Cabbage Patch doll. Oooh, I dunno. Maybe I should just stick to looking at the boobs.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

LordEden

I am completely on the fence with this topic. The top half of me says, "You need to dress professional at the work place. Don't dress like you are shelling for quarters at the local truck stop, this is a WORKplace for christ's sake."

I understand that some work places are a lot more relaxed when it comes to dress attire for the office, but still there is a need for professionalism. You either command respect or you don't. I have a bit of problem respecting a woman that is showing off her tracts of land to everyone like a desperate real estate agent. There is the possibility of the woman who knows she is hot and uses that to throw men off track in order to have an advantage over them in the land of office politics and sales. I have no idea if this works in the real world or is just a Hollywood myth.

It's also a issue with me because of the fact that I HAVE to wear pants/shirts/collars/ties (depending on my job) to work everyday. They can wear nice dresses or other clothing options that allow for more comfort during the summer/spring time. I think that is a little off-topic, but I did want to state that.

The bottom half of me says, "BOOBIES! Are they built for speed or comfort? Motorboat! You motorboating son of bitch, you old sailor you!"

So, yeah. I like boobies, but if you want respect, don't dress like that.

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Willravel

Problematic:


Inappropriate:


Just fine, though perhaps a bit overdone:

Plan9

Oh, that's right... you live in California.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

loquitur

IMHO women shouldn't show lots of cleavage at work. Part of it is an issue of respect, part of it is an issue of distraction. Like it or not, in a professional environment your appearance shouldn't distract from your work or other people's. A "look at these funbags" top just isn't professional. Outside the office, go right ahead, it's all good.

And it's not just cleavage, either. We have a lawyer here in the office who is pretty good looking (not as good looking as she thinks she is, but still, pretty easy on the eyes). She isn't so well endowed but she is in very good shape, especially for a woman her age (mid-40s). One summer day about 3 years ago she came to the office in a skintight top. Our office is air conditioned. Suffice it to say I was very very conscious of the need to look only at her eyes when I was talking to her. But I can also tell you that I now know more about what her nipples look like than any co-worker (much less boss) really should, right down to the number, size and placement of the little bumps on her areolas. Sorry, there is no way that that attire was professionally appropriate. I think someone else asked the office manager to speak to her about it, because she hasn't worn it again. And she shouldn't.

Moral of the story is: dress at work how you want yourself to be perceived. If you want to be viewed as a serious professional, you should look like one. That doesn't mean wearing a burka, and it doesn't mean not looking nice, but it does mean looking serious about your job. If you want to be viewed as a frivolous person, strut your stuff and you'll accomplish your goal.

Me, I wear a suit and tie. It's good camouflage.

Willravel

I do indeed, sir. If a woman wears more than the third image, she's a prude.

Martian

The image I posted was the result of a google image search for 'office cleavage.' As I'm sure most can imagine, there were a number of pictures that were much less appropriate. I chose the one that looked more appropriate.

It depends on your work place. Dress code and the type of job being performed enter into it, but the point to be made is that the cleavage in and of itself isn't necessarily inappropriate.

You won't see a lot of bakers or cooks dressing that way, for example. Hot oil on the boobs is not going to be attractive. I could see that as being somewhat appropriate for a clerical or other office position, though, particularly with a business casual dress code. Perhaps there could be a couple of alterations made, but the aspect that's relevant to the discussion here is the neckline, and I personally see no problem with it.

__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame

Xerxys

I go' nuthin' wron' wit' these ...

aphrodisiac

boobs... whats the problem?

if you really want to know weather to look at them for 3.84 seconds or 3.83 seconds, speak to her about it?

levite

Are you looking her in the eyes when you have conversations with her? Are you snickering and muttering "boobies!" whenever you're in the same room with her? If the answers to those questions were "yes" and "no, respectively," then it's fine. Women aren't stupid: they know they have boobs, they know their boobs look good, and they know men enjoy looking at them. Generally speaking, if those facts are problematic for them, or they aren't in the mood for those facts of a day, they will cover their boobs and wear something that doesn't accentuate them. If a woman goes to work showing cleavage, she has nobody but herself to blame if guys take the occasional notice of her boobs.

As long as you're mature and polite about it, nobody can blame a true lover of fruit if they glance over a well-displayed set of melons....

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Dull sublunary lovers love,
Whose soul is sense, cannot admit
Absence, because it doth remove
That thing which elemented it.

(From "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning" by John Donne)

Punk.of.Ages

If not, you're not kinky enough...

__________________
"The fact is that censorship always defeats its own purpose, for it creates, in the end, the kind of society that is incapable of exercising real discretion..." - Henry Steel Commager

"Punk rock music is great music played by really bad, drunk musicians." -Fat Mike

Plan9

Hot candle wax, gentlemen. Focus.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

inBOIL

A woman showing off her cleavage at work gives the impression that that's the reason she got the job. By extension, it implies that her boss was not properly considering her various attributes when making the hiring decision. It casts doubt on her abilities as well as those of her boss, which is generally not something a business wants.

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Psycho Dad

I'm all in favor of cleavage at work. As long as it isn't ass cleavage from the maintenance guy working on the copier.

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wooÐs

Perhaps her boss is a woman?

Martian

A little bit of heated oil in the bedroom? Sure, why not. 100+ degree cooking oil? Less so.

I don't care who you are, third degree burns are not hot.

On topic... well, I still consider to stand by my earlier thoughts. Cleavage is not Teh Debbil. It's possible for low cut tops to not be work place appropriate, but then I'd argue my AC/DC tshirt isn't workplace appropriate either, and there's no cleavage involved there.

Cleavage can be classy. It happens.

__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame