The most inappropriate laughs - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

thespian86 · 05-23-2006, 04:40 PM

Ever had sex? Pretty sure you have! Ever had a really great time and gotten slightly "giddy"? I bet this is also the case.

So who here has ever laughed at something someone has done or said that was truely a very "foot-in-mouth" situation.

I can share mine. My girlfriend and I joke about things that we would say during sex. She isn't entirely adventurous and usually waits for me to say something or start doing something before she gets in the grove. It started out being silly things like small groans. She took the lead there and started groaning hard and eventually moaning loudly when I made her come. But things like speaking were surely taboo? i didn't think so, so I started speaking obviously. First with things that were true and simple like "I love you" and "It feels so good to be inside you" and we both knew it was true and it made things really more passionate and fun.

Since then we have made jokes about us saying things along the lines of me (the simple yet hilarious dane cook joke) "Ohhhh baby; my dick feels like corn!" and her (from our recent dual-principal character casting in CATS) screaming "MaCavity!" when she climaxed. Those were all jokes. Also, let me say that I get quite giddy after I come and giggle a little bit at simple things.
It just so happens that she is becoming more adventurous. I had a condom on, obviously, and I came hard and let her know it. Thats when, in the heat of the moment she said, loudly, and quite dirty;

"Oh! I love it when you come inside me... ohhhhhh! it feels so good"

I lost it. I laughed and laughed and laughed until she threw me off of her and I continued to laugh. After I had calmed down I asked if I could go down on her (even though she had already come twice during intercourse) and she said yes, embarrassed but horny nonetheless. But, alas, as soon as I got face-to-face with her, so to speak, i lost it again thinking about what she had said and how she had said it exactly as both the bed and I had gone quiet.

So has anyone here lost it mid session to the dismay of yourself and your partner? SHARE a story and SHARE a laugh

PMF21

Toaster126 · 05-23-2006, 06:04 PM

Nope. The only times I've felt like laughing I've stifled it so I didn't cause someone permanent mental scarring and hangups.

Sage · 05-23-2006, 06:17 PM

That's the most hilarious sex story i've ever heard

I can't think of anything really funny right off the top of my head, but I'm sure Martel and I have shared some giggles!

abaya · 05-23-2006, 06:30 PM

Oh, ktspktsp and I laugh a lot, usually from little funny things that happen... one common event is when our bodies are all sweaty and moving against each other (esp in missionary), and we get little "squelches" (kinda like when you make a fake fart noise with your hands, but we do it with our whole bodies!).

We also bang our teeth together sometimes, when we are really into the kissing... it's cute, though slightly painful at times!

Oh, and when I am going down on him and I am totally into it, and then suddenly the gag reflex happens and I have to get him out of my mouth quick... that usually produces a quick chuckle between us, and then I'm back to work.

Probably the funniest thing that ever happened was when we first got together... a few days after we hooked up, I got my period. But we still wanted to try having sex standing up (towards the end of my period, when I thought the flow had stopped)... so he was holding me up against the wall while we had sex. We were going at it, enjoying ourselves... but in one moment when he had pulled me away from the wall, we noticed that the wall had red streaks all over it!

(I know, gross.) It was hilarious. We cleaned it quickly and laughed our asses off; can't remember if we even finished that session, it was so funny.

tspikes51 · 05-24-2006, 12:37 AM

How about I've made it a policy of mine to say something really stupid every time I have sex this summer just to see the reaction. The last time I remember (the last time I had sex, I was so drunk I have no recollection of ever doing it) having sex, any time she would say something, I'd ask her to repeat it:

Her: "Oh, God, that's good"
Me: "Huh?"
Her: "I said, that's good."
Me: "What?"

You could imagine the frustration. For those who haven't assumed so already, I don't have a girlfriend. I'm just an intermediate pick-up artist.

analog · 05-24-2006, 01:53 AM

With one of my girlfriends in particular, we had a lot of fun with sex... we would sometimes be having some slow sex, and one of us would start LOUDLY blurting out the most raunchy, flithy, porno-style commentary.

Things like me yelling out, "Oh you like that hard dick inside you, don't you?" and her yelling out, porno-style, yes, fuck me, harder, oh god, etc., randomly, back to back.

She also once yelled, "Fuck me! Fuck me like I owe you money!!"

This caused the sex to stop altogether for about 5 minutes while we both tried to stop laughing. To this day, it'd still probably the funniest moment in sex i've ever had.

In one of my movie scripts, i'd written the line, "Fuck her! Fuck her like she owes you money!!" for this very sort of crude character telling his friend to go have sex with a girl and "give it to her good", so to speak. My girlfriend at the time had just read that portion of the script earlier that day. That's where it came from.

One day in particular we were being extra loud and horrible with it, and laughing our asses off, to emerge afterwards from my bedroom into the living room to see about a dozen of my friends all sitting around, the biggest bunch of grins and horrified-with-laughter faces you've ever seen.

A few friends took some convincing, and my roommate backing us up, that we did that all on purpose, and that we weren't just really, really, REALLY bizarre in bed. That was hilarious.

Note: we were alone in the apartment when we went into my room and started, but almost 2 hours had gone by at that point, so the friends all had plenty of time to show up with my roommate and then all filter in.

noodle · 05-24-2006, 03:05 AM

The first time my SO tried to talk dirty, it was so out of character to see/hear him pull a porno face and say "Oh yeah, baby, you like that big cock, don't you?" that I started to laugh. I didn't want him to realize that I was laughing so I stifled it and started shaking so hard from laughing that he thought he was The Man. Until I snorted and lost it, and burst out laughing... after the initial shock, and he finished, I demonstrated the face and the statement for him and we both collapsed in giggles. It's a great joke now.

thespian86 · 05-24-2006, 03:29 AM

Exactly! it was so out of character to say anything other then something that she knew I would be comfortable with and she just blurted it out, exactly when I stopped to reposition myself (my fucking extremely squeeky bed was now silent and I had stopped moving or groaning)... she just told me to get off of her in a sarcasta-bitch kind of way. And I tried to hold her to tell her I it wasn't her (which was a lie) and started laughing again. I realized that I had proclaimed right after she said it, through tears and convulsing laughter, "were you just talking dirty?" Fucking hilarious. We havn't had sex yet (it was last sunday) but we will have about four hours alone today which will probably result in twice around the merry-go-round

Thanks for your posts guys, keep em coming (pun intended)

05-23-2006, 04:40 PM	#1 (permalink)
thespian86 change is hard. Location: the green room.	The most inappropriate laughs Ever had sex? Pretty sure you have! Ever had a really great time and gotten slightly "giddy"? I bet this is also the case. So who here has ever laughed at something someone has done or said that was truely a very "foot-in-mouth" situation. I can share mine. My girlfriend and I joke about things that we would say during sex. She isn't entirely adventurous and usually waits for me to say something or start doing something before she gets in the grove. It started out being silly things like small groans. She took the lead there and started groaning hard and eventually moaning loudly when I made her come. But things like speaking were surely taboo? i didn't think so, so I started speaking obviously. First with things that were true and simple like "I love you" and "It feels so good to be inside you" and we both knew it was true and it made things really more passionate and fun. Since then we have made jokes about us saying things along the lines of me (the simple yet hilarious dane cook joke) "Ohhhh baby; my dick feels like corn!" and her (from our recent dual-principal character casting in CATS) screaming "MaCavity!" when she climaxed. Those were all jokes. Also, let me say that I get quite giddy after I come and giggle a little bit at simple things. It just so happens that she is becoming more adventurous. I had a condom on, obviously, and I came hard and let her know it. Thats when, in the heat of the moment she said, loudly, and quite dirty; "Oh! I love it when you come inside me... ohhhhhh! it feels so good" I lost it. I laughed and laughed and laughed until she threw me off of her and I continued to laugh. After I had calmed down I asked if I could go down on her (even though she had already come twice during intercourse) and she said yes, embarrassed but horny nonetheless. But, alas, as soon as I got face-to-face with her, so to speak, i lost it again thinking about what she had said and how she had said it exactly as both the bed and I had gone quiet. So has anyone here lost it mid session to the dismay of yourself and your partner? SHARE a story and SHARE a laugh PMF21 __________________ EX: Whats new? ME: I officially love coffee more then you now. EX: uh... ME: So, not much.

05-23-2006, 06:04 PM	#2 (permalink)
Toaster126 Extreme moderation Location: Kansas City, yo.	Nope. The only times I've felt like laughing I've stifled it so I didn't cause someone permanent mental scarring and hangups. __________________ "The question isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me." (Ayn Rand) "The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers." (M. Scott Peck)

05-23-2006, 06:17 PM	#3 (permalink)
Sage hoarding all the big girl panties since 2005 Location: North side	That's the most hilarious sex story i've ever heard I can't think of anything really funny right off the top of my head, but I'm sure Martel and I have shared some giggles! __________________ Sage knows our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's She answers hard acrostics, has a pretty taste for paradox She quotes in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus In conics she can floor peculiarities parabolous -C'hi

05-23-2006, 06:30 PM	#4 (permalink)
abaya Location: Iceland	Oh, ktspktsp and I laugh a lot, usually from little funny things that happen... one common event is when our bodies are all sweaty and moving against each other (esp in missionary), and we get little "squelches" (kinda like when you make a fake fart noise with your hands, but we do it with our whole bodies!). We also bang our teeth together sometimes, when we are really into the kissing... it's cute, though slightly painful at times! Oh, and when I am going down on him and I am totally into it, and then suddenly the gag reflex happens and I have to get him out of my mouth quick... that usually produces a quick chuckle between us, and then I'm back to work. Probably the funniest thing that ever happened was when we first got together... a few days after we hooked up, I got my period. But we still wanted to try having sex standing up (towards the end of my period, when I thought the flow had stopped)... so he was holding me up against the wall while we had sex. We were going at it, enjoying ourselves... but in one moment when he had pulled me away from the wall, we noticed that the wall had red streaks all over it! (I know, gross.) It was hilarious. We cleaned it quickly and laughed our asses off; can't remember if we even finished that session, it was so funny. __________________ And think not you can direct the course of Love; for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course. --Khalil Gibran

05-24-2006, 12:37 AM	#5 (permalink)
tspikes51 Fuckin' A Location: Lex Vegas	How about I've made it a policy of mine to say something really stupid every time I have sex this summer just to see the reaction. The last time I remember (the last time I had sex, I was so drunk I have no recollection of ever doing it) having sex, any time she would say something, I'd ask her to repeat it: Her: "Oh, God, that's good" Me: "Huh?" Her: "I said, that's good." Me: "What?" You could imagine the frustration. For those who haven't assumed so already, I don't have a girlfriend. I'm just an intermediate pick-up artist. __________________ "I'm telling you, we need to get rid of a few people or a million." -Maddox

05-24-2006, 01:53 AM	#6 (permalink)
analog Banned	With one of my girlfriends in particular, we had a lot of fun with sex... we would sometimes be having some slow sex, and one of us would start LOUDLY blurting out the most raunchy, flithy, porno-style commentary. Things like me yelling out, "Oh you like that hard dick inside you, don't you?" and her yelling out, porno-style, yes, fuck me, harder, oh god, etc., randomly, back to back. She also once yelled, "Fuck me! Fuck me like I owe you money!!" This caused the sex to stop altogether for about 5 minutes while we both tried to stop laughing. To this day, it'd still probably the funniest moment in sex i've ever had. In one of my movie scripts, i'd written the line, "Fuck her! Fuck her like she owes you money!!" for this very sort of crude character telling his friend to go have sex with a girl and "give it to her good", so to speak. My girlfriend at the time had just read that portion of the script earlier that day. That's where it came from. One day in particular we were being extra loud and horrible with it, and laughing our asses off, to emerge afterwards from my bedroom into the living room to see about a dozen of my friends all sitting around, the biggest bunch of grins and horrified-with-laughter faces you've ever seen. A few friends took some convincing, and my roommate backing us up, that we did that all on purpose, and that we weren't just really, really, REALLY bizarre in bed. That was hilarious. Note: we were alone in the apartment when we went into my room and started, but almost 2 hours had gone by at that point, so the friends all had plenty of time to show up with my roommate and then all filter in. Last edited by analog; 05-24-2006 at 01:58 AM..

05-24-2006, 03:29 AM	#8 (permalink)
thespian86 change is hard. Location: the green room.	Exactly! it was so out of character to say anything other then something that she knew I would be comfortable with and she just blurted it out, exactly when I stopped to reposition myself (my fucking extremely squeeky bed was now silent and I had stopped moving or groaning)... she just told me to get off of her in a sarcasta-bitch kind of way. And I tried to hold her to tell her I it wasn't her (which was a lie) and started laughing again. I realized that I had proclaimed right after she said it, through tears and convulsing laughter, "were you just talking dirty?" Fucking hilarious. We havn't had sex yet (it was last sunday) but we will have about four hours alone today which will probably result in twice around the merry-go-round Thanks for your posts guys, keep em coming (pun intended) __________________ EX: Whats new? ME: I officially love coffee more then you now. EX: uh... ME: So, not much.