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Old 03-19-2004, 09:03 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Jehovah...at the door

I just answered the doorbell and found three guys in suits, with watchtower in hand....asking if they could come in and talk.

I invited them in.
As they sat down I watched them scan my home and slowly realize what they had walked into....kinda funny.
I am Pagan and have an alter in the living room, no not Satanic or cultish, just into earth based religion.
These guys looked truly spooked. Inside I was quite giddy.They didnt seem to want to talk at all, so I started to ask them about the beliefs of thier"cult".Didnt go over so well, but definately got one of them talking. Told me what I was doing was a cult, and witnessing was "Gods" will, and I could still be saved.
Rather than argue....I closed my eyes and pretended to be in trance, then told them God just told me that the guy down the street would be easier to save.
I thanked them for the concern and wished them luck in saving the other 5.9billion people they need to talk to, looked at their shoes and suggested they invest in something more comfy, as there was a lot of walking ahead of them.

My point is, was it cruel of me to play them like that, or was it just payment for coming uninvited?
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Old 03-19-2004, 09:06 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I've had them come in and sit for point to point line for line bible debate.

IMHO so long as you didn't assault or molest them it's not cruel at all.
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Old 03-19-2004, 09:08 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I had a friend who, when greeted at the door by Jehovah's Witness always asked them "what is their church's point of view on oral sex?"

Most were gone before the closing door could hit their ass...
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Old 03-19-2004, 09:37 AM   #4 (permalink)
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That's a good way to deal with it. We rarely see them in my neighborhood anymore, so I don't know what I would do.
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Old 03-19-2004, 09:57 AM   #5 (permalink)
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i made the mistake of debating with JW's once. They took that as a sign that I was a soul in desperate need of saving, and came at least once a week thereafter until I moved. Of course, it worked out that I was never home when they came, so they kept bugging my wife about what they could do in partnership with her to save me. Apparantly, they decided she either didn't need saving or wasn't worthy of it. She nearly killed me every time they came after awhile
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Old 03-19-2004, 10:16 AM   #6 (permalink)
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My dad told em that if the starving people in africa hurried up and starved to death already, the problem would be solved. You can imagine the reaction.
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Old 03-19-2004, 11:31 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by shakran
i made the mistake of debating with JW's once. They took that as a sign that I was a soul in desperate need of saving, and came at least once a week thereafter until I moved. Of course, it worked out that I was never home when they came, so they kept bugging my wife about what they could do in partnership with her to save me.
I had a group of Mormons do this to me once. They sold me a subscription to the newspaper. One asked for a drink of water, so, I invited them in.

What a mistake.

They started to talking about religion and forgot all about the water. After about 5 minutes of being uncomfortable, I told them that my relationship to God was my business and if they didn't mind I'd like to rub one out before I went to work and gestured toward the door.

They left. Pretty quick.
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Old 03-19-2004, 11:51 AM   #8 (permalink)
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My girlfriend is a Witness, so I may be biased, but I really think you shouldn't fuck with people like that.

They're just people like everyone else, and deserve to be treated with respect like normal human beings. If you don't want to talk to them, then just ask them to leave. They probably will. If you genuinely want to talk about religion or the bible, then talk to them. Most of them are actually extremely knowledgeable about the bible, though I will admit they have some wacky interpretations of it. But treating them like shit so you can then later go and chuckle with your friends about it is not cool.

Look at it this way. From their perspective they are trying to give you eternal life in paradise. And it’s not as if they get brownie points for converting more people. If they try really hard it’s because they really care. So whether or not you agree with them, at least appreciate the effort.
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Old 03-19-2004, 12:16 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Since they go around to random people and try to convert them, they leave themselves open to what can happen. Different people have different positions on this. Personally, I expect their biggest fear is probably entering the house of a missionary of another religion who will succeed in converting them. They take their chances.

As long as they're not hurt physically, are not seriously abused, and are allowed to leave when they wish, I don't see a problem with whatever response they get.
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Old 03-19-2004, 01:08 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I once had a conversation with one of these guys. He explained how the world would one day become a kingdom with God as leader. I then explained to him that this would be a dictatorship, and that I would not like to live in such a country, without any freedom to do as I please, always doing what God wanted me to do, kinda like a lowly slave.

That pretty much ruined his side of the debate.
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Old 03-19-2004, 02:31 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dragonlich
I once had a conversation with one of these guys. He explained how the world would one day become a kingdom with God as leader. I then explained to him that this would be a dictatorship, and that I would not like to live in such a country, without any freedom to do as I please, always doing what God wanted me to do, kinda like a lowly slave.

That pretty much ruined his side of the debate.
Nice!

I used to be a Witness, so I can speak from both sides of the fence, as I've been visited by Witness's who weren't aware I'd left the religion.

While I don't see the point in being outright mean to them, I also think that they are opening the "can-o-worms" themselves by choosing to talk to strangers. They are just uninvited door to door salesmen as far as I'm concerned. They assume you NEED their product, so they are going to try everything to "sell" it to you. Don't give them an inch if you don't want to spend an hour chatting.

And, yes, in case you can't tell, I'm not sorry in the slightest that I left.
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Old 03-19-2004, 06:10 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I politely tell them that I'm not interested, ask if they would like a glass of water, tell them "Have a good day and God bless you" and let them walk away to the next house. Sure, I'm agnostic, and I don't mean "God bless you" as sincerely as they do, but I figure they take enough abuse from the rest of the world, so I might as well be nice to them and give tehm the idea that maybe the world isn't as fucked up as they wory it is.

On the other hand, if they get pushy, I'll bust out the death metal.
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Old 03-19-2004, 06:26 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Once, I was at a friend's place. We were just eating lunch and some religious salespeople came to the door (they were Mormons if I remember correctly). Anyway, he answered the door, and they were chatting at him for a minute. I guess they were offering free books of Mormon, and my friend said, "Hey thanks, I needed more toilet paper" as he grabbed it from them. They just kind of stood their gape-jawed and he closed the door on them.

I am not endorsing nor condemning his actions, but rest assured, I know your inner-bastard is laughing it's ass off right now.
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Old 03-19-2004, 08:26 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by denim
Since they go around to random people and try to convert them, they leave themselves open to what can happen. Different people have different positions on this. Personally, I expect their biggest fear is probably entering the house of a missionary of another religion who will succeed in converting them. They take their chances.

As long as they're not hurt physically, are not seriously abused, and are allowed to leave when they wish, I don't see a problem with whatever response they get.
I don't have a problem with people who genuinely want to convert them to another religion. Free marketplace of ideas and all that good stuff. I do have a problem with people who are intentionally assholes to them because, hey, its fun to make fun of witnesses and mormans. I personaly think its kind of sick that people get pleasure out of tormenting them. If they annoy you that much get a no soliciting sign.
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Old 03-20-2004, 01:09 AM   #15 (permalink)
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There are usually two Mormons, both well dressed and well groomed guys who solicit people walking on the route that I walk. They never approached me untill one day that I stopped to re-tie my hiking boot. After a brief and pleasant exchange, we mutually decided that I wasn't about to be converted. Now everyday when I'm walking home, we have a little banter.

I say "Save any souls today?" - "Perhaps we will- are you ready yet?" or they say "Excuse me, heathen, but your shoelace is untied" and I reply in kind "Oh, I'm not looking down, God boy" They say to most people "Excuse me, Sir(Maam), may we have a momment of your time." and they asked me if I was prepared to endure torment in Hell during our first meeting. I was recently walking with a friend, he was rather taken aback by the exchange, but amused after I explained.
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Old 03-20-2004, 06:46 AM   #16 (permalink)
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A friend of mine was home sick when he was in high school, and was just lounging around on the couch in his boxers, wrapped in a blanket. Some JW and her little daughter knocked on the door, and he got up to answer it. The daughter started giggling and the woman gave him this horrified look and walked away with her daughter as fast as she could. He didn't realize that he was um...hanging out of his boxers.
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Old 03-20-2004, 07:21 AM   #17 (permalink)
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one of my best friends is a mormon. He and I have had long and rousing debates about mormonism. I've always told him that if he can, using logic, convince me that the whole Joseph Smith story has a grain of truth to it, I'll go to temple with him. I have yet to go

But he realizes, and i've noticed this of a lot of mormons, that you don't necessarilly have to be MORMON to be a good person. As long as the religious guy has that idea firmly in place, I'm usually pretty cool with them. It's only the idiots that like to protest in front of elementary schools with giant photoshopped pictures of "aborted" fetuses who say that it's their way or hell that piss me off.
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Old 03-20-2004, 04:29 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by shakran
one of my best friends is a mormon. He and I have had long and rousing debates about mormonism. I've always told him that if he can, using logic, convince me that the whole Joseph Smith story has a grain of truth to it, I'll go to temple with him. I have yet to go

You need to see the mormon episode of southpark. absolute classic, it's awesome.

I've never had a JW come to my door though. I don't know what i'd do, I'd probably talk like a pikey and freak em out.
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Old 03-20-2004, 06:43 PM   #19 (permalink)
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The day me and my brother argued down the Mormons using Simpsons quotes until they got tired and decided to leave...

What a victory for the God of Television...
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Old 03-20-2004, 09:16 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Stare At The Sun
You need to see the mormon episode of southpark. absolute classic, it's awesome.


I saw that a few weeks ago. It replaced "Chickenlover" as the alltime funniest southpark IMHO. I really wanted to show it to my friend, but I can't be that mean

I was hummin' that "dumb dumb dumb" song the whole next day.
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Old 03-20-2004, 11:28 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Selling Jesus or Jehova, I make little distinction between the two, is something I really detest. Yes, they're people, too, and I am sure they do what they do because they care. And so on and so forth. But I did not invite them over. There is no sign at my door that says please come save me from my wicked ways. If I want to be saved by you, I'll come and ask for it. If I am even remotely interested in your beliefs, I'll give you a call. But until you hear otherwise from me, back the fuck off and don't even knock.

I can't even keep the computer offline for ten minutes without having the phone ring because someone wants to sell me something. Peace and quiet is a luxury these days, and I don't take too well to people wasting it.

I see nothing wrong with what you did. Now, had you signed up on some "Come talk to me about your religion" list, that'd be different.
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Old 03-21-2004, 07:56 AM   #22 (permalink)
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Re: Jehovah...at the door

Quote:
Originally posted by tecoyah
My point is, was it cruel of me to play them like that, or was it just payment for coming uninvited?
As far as the JW's are concerned, nah, 'twas pretty funny actually. Just tell me you don't do that to little kids who come to your door selling chocolate bars to raise money for school and stuff.
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Old 03-21-2004, 11:35 AM   #23 (permalink)
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One day a couple of young men jw's came to my home. I welcomed them in and they started to speak, but obviously feeling uncomfortable.
I let them casually and respectfully know that I am very spiritual, accepting all religions, but that I focus more on a Universal level. They were amazed and were very inquisitive about my spirituality. I asked them why they decided to be jw's, and they explained with utmost genuinity and love. The way they described it was actually beautiful, a side I never heard before regarding their beliefs. yet they steered back to me and asked me more questions. I felt really good and they really enjoyed what I had to say and they didn't bother preaching to me at all. They just smiled and repeatedly thanked me for being such a beautiful, nice, and spiritual person and they left. It was pleasant and I am glad to have had that experience. Not all religious people are thumpers.
 
Old 03-21-2004, 02:15 PM   #24 (permalink)
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My only problem with JW coming to my door is that they are outright PUSHY. They dont seem to take no for an answer. Ok, i understand that they would like to shed their religious light on the rest of the world, but if I am not interested and I clearly state that - they should back off!!!
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Old 03-21-2004, 03:46 PM   #25 (permalink)
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I tell them I can't be a witness because I didn't see the accident.
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Old 03-21-2004, 08:28 PM   #26 (permalink)
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My friend absolutely loves when jw's come to visit...when the preach to him he tells them why smurfs are blue and not red
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Old 03-22-2004, 04:28 AM   #27 (permalink)
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I always chat with them for a bit and then ask them this question..." How can a billion and a half Chinese, a billion Indians, a billion Muslems and almost a billion Catholics be wrong?" Their noses crinkle a little while they're thinking about it and I say "Come back when you have the answer" and shut the door. Haven't seen them since and that was about 5 years ago.
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Old 03-22-2004, 08:00 AM   #28 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by iccky
I don't have a problem with people who genuinely want to convert them to another religion. Free marketplace of ideas and all that good stuff. I do have a problem with people who are intentionally assholes to them because, hey, its fun to make fun of witnesses and mormans. I personaly think its kind of sick that people get pleasure out of tormenting them. If they annoy you that much get a no soliciting sign.
I think you have a real point there, but there's still wiggle room.

I agree that there's already enough suffering in the world and that creating more is cruel, especially considering they just want to do well by you. However, the other side of that is that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. And the government man is here to help you. And the Crusades were supposed to convert the heathens to Christ. And the Communists were trying to help the Proletariat.

And if you believe that any of that actually worked/works the way it's represented, I have a bridge or two to sell you.

As I said, there's wiggle room in there.
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Old 03-22-2004, 08:03 AM   #29 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Stare At The Sun
You need to see the mormon episode of southpark. absolute classic, it's awesome.
Yes, good ep.

Quote:
I've never had a JW come to my door though. I don't know what i'd do, I'd probably talk like a pikey and freak em out.
I have. Most recently, I wasn't in any mood to deal with them, so I didn't open the door and told them I wasn't interested. Flat, cold, and effective.
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Old 03-22-2004, 05:27 PM   #30 (permalink)
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I wouldn't say what you did was really rude. They do tend to make people uncomfortable when they show up unannounced and are so hard to get rid of. You got rid of them effectively. If you show any interest at all they WILL come back. If you creep them out enough they will stay away so you effectively rid yourself of them at least for a while. I've heard that they will mark houses of those who will "debate" with them or at least talk about their religion at all. Even if you accept their papers they tend to come back. I have approached them in more than one way. First I did debate with them. The 2 girls got really uncomfortable when I started talking about the original Hebrew and Greek texts and how their "Bible" leave out many sections that are found in those texts. They kindof were at a loss in how to respond since they were trained to spout their religion and not debate something that detailed. I was thankful for my Bible degree that time. They kindof quite coming for a while.

When they started coming again I accepted their papers and told them I had to go right away since I'd only recently had a new baby and was very uncomfortable just standing with stitches in my belly. They continued to come more then. Finally I refused any papers and told them I did not want to talk. They practically begged to talk to me then but Ijust repeated the same phrase in response to everything they said. Saying "I'm sorry, I do not want to talk to you or read your papers. I do not agree with your beliefs." Finally after the 3rd time repeating myself they excused themselves and I never saw them again. I've never let them into my home. EVER. Simply because it encourages them to talk more and puts them in control because I nearly have to be rude to get rid of them.

One time they came to talk to my mother the week before my wedding when we were frantically preparing. They really refused to leave or quit talking to her. I could hear it and her frustration and finally came out said "You will have to leave now. I need my mother to get things ready for my wedding." My mother took the cue, said goodbye, and we just turned out backs and walked inside.

I will be polite as I can but when it comes down to it I will be blunt and tell them outright to leave. Better than wasting their time really since I'm not about to be converted - I know I could not hold to their beliefs as I've looked into it already.

Sorry so long- didn't realize how long winded I got.
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Old 03-22-2004, 06:43 PM   #31 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by iccky
My girlfriend is a Witness, so I may be biased, but I really think you shouldn't fuck with people like that.

They're just people like everyone else, and deserve to be treated with respect like normal human beings. If you don't want to talk to them, then just ask them to leave. They probably will. If you genuinely want to talk about religion or the bible, then talk to them. Most of them are actually extremely knowledgeable about the bible, though I will admit they have some wacky interpretations of it. But treating them like shit so you can then later go and chuckle with your friends about it is not cool.

Look at it this way. From their perspective they are trying to give you eternal life in paradise. And it’s not as if they get brownie points for converting more people. If they try really hard it’s because they really care. So whether or not you agree with them, at least appreciate the effort.
Fuck 'em.

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Old 03-22-2004, 08:00 PM   #32 (permalink)
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My opinion is, if I want to buy something, I go shopping. Anyone who comes to my door wanting to sell me anything gets more or less the same thing "There's the sidewalk. Be on it before I get nasty." I'm nicer to kids, ruder to the religious. "Go sell crazy somewhere else, we're all stocked up here." or "I got a batch of beer on the stove right now. I have 2 minutes before the next batch of hops goes in. You can have one on them. Go. You have 59 seconds left." or "Hmm? Stay naked and have sex with my wife or get dressed and talk to you about your imaginary friend? Tough choice. (Close Door)."

I just despise salesmen of any kind at my door.
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Old 03-23-2004, 07:31 AM   #33 (permalink)
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solution=DON'T answer the door!

But what you did was without a doubt pretty funny. There have been a few times in which they've caught me off guard and I've answered the door thinking that it was someone else that I was expecting. They can be VERY pushy and persistant. Sometimes you just have to slam the door in thier face in order for them to leave you alone.

It's also a plus to have a BIG threatening looking dog right next to them, growling. And when they ask if bites or not, say, "only if I tell him to..." That'll scare the shit out of them, and they won't come back for long time!
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Old 03-23-2004, 04:35 PM   #34 (permalink)
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I just cannot stand ANYONE who pushes there religion on other people.

My wife and I had experiences where these jick-jacks would come and knock on our door. It was hilarious. My wife answered, and stated that we were Satanists, and I started barking as lound as I could, and they just took off. Its like go sell this shit someplace else, I hate those fucking people.

V.
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Old 03-23-2004, 10:30 PM   #35 (permalink)
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True story; I had door to door Budhists once! They asked me if I was feeling ok (I had just been to the doctors office and assumed they were a follow up visit, Japan is a great place) I said I still wasn't a hundred percent (flu). They then started getting excited and telling me how their cult could help me. They showed me pictures of statues, offered me some incense, it was all very strange. I wonder what the average Japanese person would have done...
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Old 03-26-2004, 06:41 AM   #36 (permalink)
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The wife and I have our own Witnesses. That is to say we have JW who visit regularly and they have given up trying to convert us and simply stop in to chat about kids and jobs and health. When they leave they offer a watchtower and we accept and they are happy and we have had a nice visit with pleasant people.
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Old 03-26-2004, 02:24 PM   #37 (permalink)
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My dad was on hands and knees, furiously barking at the door when JWs came by one time. He was barking up a storm and banging on the door, up until the point when the door flew open. He forgot to completely close the door.

I don't remember what happened after that because I was so little.
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Old 03-27-2004, 01:29 AM   #38 (permalink)
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I've never had them come, but I've always wanted to ask them "what happens when there's more than 120,000 of you?" (If I recall, they're named after a passage in the Bible stating that 120K witnesses will be saved, Revelations, I think).
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Old 03-27-2004, 03:46 AM   #39 (permalink)
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A buddy of mine had t-shirt made up that stated "I hate organized religions." He saw some JW or mormons coming down the street, turned on Motley Crue's "SHout at the Devil" and answered the door. They took one look at him heard the music and just turned around. They never even said a word!
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Old 03-27-2004, 07:03 PM   #40 (permalink)
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when the JW's come to my house i would usually watch them trhough teh peep hole..then after they wait for a couple mins. and as they start to walk away i'd make a small squeaking noise or whimper.. then they'd come back and ring the doorbell and wait, thinking someone's home..i would continue this until they gave up
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