10-07-2003, 10:30 PM | #1 (permalink) |
Banned
Location: Orange County, California
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Motivation
I found this and liked it. If you have a few minutes, take the time to read this. I got a kick out of it and it reminded me a lot of real life and some of my friends. Possibly some of you might relate as well...
Don't be like Bob "So, what are you doing for a living these days?" Bob asked me. We're sitting on the couch at one of those tedious holiday get-togethers, you know, the ones where you're supposed to be nice to family members you never see except during major holidays and funerals. I think Bob is my wife's brother-in-law's second cousin or something. "I'm the assistant editor and a writer for Testosterone magazine," I say. Bob looks at me with a blank expression on his face, as if I'd just told him I sell handmade testicle warmers beside the freeway and was looking to open franchises across the nation. "It's a bodybuilding magazine," I say. Blank expression. Deer caught in the headlights. Ronnie Coleman doing trigonometry. "Oh," Bob finally says, "I heard you were, like, one of those bodybuilder guys or something. So, what's that like, you know, working out every day and stuff? I just don't have time to lift weights all day, but I have been meaning to get rid of this beer belly." He takes another sip of beer. "What do you suggest?" Sip. At first I was a little offended. I wanted to grab him up and say, "You can't tell I'm a bodybuilder?! Look at my ass! Now, if that's not a nice round squat-built piece of sirloin, I don't know what is! You think that comes naturally? I can crack walnuts with this puppy! Wanna see? Huh, punk? Do ya? Do ya?" Then I realize this just might cause a scene and could cost me several Christmas presents. I was planning on returning any presents I got and using the money to buy a power rack, so I didn't want to jeopardize this gift getting opportunity. I also realized that old Bob probably had a certain preconceived image of a bodybuilder and I just didn't fit that image. I'm not gorilla huge; I weigh about 205 at 6' right now. (When I first started lifting I was a pudgy 159, so that's not too shabby.) Also, I wasn't wearing clown pants, a fluorescent string tank top, a hanky on my head and one of those little fanny packs. And isn't that what real bodybuilders are supposed to wear? Bob continued to sit there drinking his Natural Light, smoking a cigarette and waiting for an answer, oblivious to the fact that he'd come this close to seeing some serious walnut- crunching ass power. I tried to figure out how I could explain to the average guy what the typical T-Man does and why he does it. How could I get him to understand what it is we do, how we feel, how we live? So I took a deep breath and told him something like this: "Well, Bob, I guess you could use the term bodybuilder if you really need a label for what it is we do. Most of us actually don't stand on stage and compete, though. We lift weights and manipulate our diets so that we'll look good naked. Sure, it's healthy too, and we'll probably live a longer and more productive life than the average guy, but mostly it's about the naked thing. Truthfully, it goes beyond even that. "Let's be honest here. We do it because of people like you, Bob. We look at you sitting there with your gut hanging over your belt and we watch you grunt and groan just getting out of a chair. Guys like you are our inspiration, Bob. You're better than Anthony Robbins, Bill Phillips, Deepak Chopra, and Zig fucking Ziglar all wrapped up into one. We love it when guys like you talk about not having time to exercise. Every time we see you munching on a bag of potato chips, you inspire us. You're my shot in the arm, Bob, my living and breathing wake-up call, my own personal success coach. "You want to know what it is we do? We overcome. We're too busy to train, too, but we overcome. We're too busy to prepare healthy meals and eat them five or six times a day, but we overcome. We can't always afford supplements, our genetics aren't perfect, and we don't always feel like going to the gym. Some of us used to be just like you, Bob, but guess what? We've overcome. "We like to watch 'normal' people like you tell us about how they can't get in shape. We smile and nod sympathetically like we feel your pain, but actually, we're thinking that you're a pathetic piece of shit that needs to grow a spine and join a gym. You smile sheepishly and say that you just can't stay motivated and just can't stand that feeling of being sore. (For some reason you think that admitting your weaknesses somehow justifies them.) We listen to you bitch and moan. We watch you look for the easy way out. Because of people like you, Bob, we never miss a workout. "You ask us for advice about diet and training and usually we politely offer some guidance, but deep inside we know you won't take our advice. You know that too. We smile and say, 'Hope that helps. Good luck,' but actually we're thinking, 'Boy, it would suck to be you.' We know that 99% of people won't listen to us. Once they hear that it takes hard work, sacrifice and discipline, they stop listening and tune us out. "We know they wanted us to say that building a great body is easy, but it just isn't. This did not take five minutes a day on a TorsoTrack. We did not get this way in 12 short weeks using a Bowflex and the Suzanne Somers' 'Get Skinny' diet. A good body does not cost five easy payments of $39.95. "We like it that while you're eating a candy bar and drinking Mountain Dew, we're sucking down a protein shake. You see, that makes it taste even better to us. While you're asleep we're either getting up early or staying up late, hitting the iron, pushing ourselves, learning, succeeding and failing and rising above the norm with every rep. Can you feel that, Bob? Can you relate? No? Good. This wouldn't be half as fun if you could. "We do it because we absolutely and totally get off on it. We do it because people like you, Bob, either can't or won't. We do it because what we do in the gym transfers over into the rest of our lives and changes us, physically, mentally, maybe even spiritually. We do it because it beats watching fishing and golf on TV. By the way, do you know what it's like to turn the head of a beautiful woman because of the way you're built? It feels good, Bob. Damned good. "When we're in the gym, we're in this indescribable euphoria zone. It's a feeling of being on, of being completely alive and aware. If you haven't been there, then it's like trying to describe color to a person who's been blind since birth. Within this haze of pleasure and pain, there's knowledge and power, self-discipline and self-reliance. If you do it long enough, Bob, there's even enlightenment. Sometimes, the answers to questions you didn't even know you had are sitting there on those rubber mats, wrapped up in a neat package of iron plates and bars. "Want to lose that beer belly, Bob? I have a nutty idea. Put down the fucking beer. I'll tell you what, Bob. Christmas morning I'm getting up real early and hitting the iron. I want to watch my daughter open her presents and spend the whole day with her, so this is the only time I have to train. The gym will be closed, so I'm going out in my garage to workout. You be at my house at six in the morning, okay? I'll be glad to help you get started on a weight training program. It'll be colder than Hillary Clinton's coochie in there, so dress warm. "But let me tell you something, Bob. If you don't show up, don't bother asking me again. And don't you ever sit there and let me hear you bitch about your beer belly again. This is your chance, your big opportunity to break out of that rut. If you don't show up, Bob, you've learned a very important lesson about yourself, haven't you? You won't like that lesson. "You won't like that feeling in the pit of your stomach either or that taste in your mouth. It will taste worse than defeat, Bob. Defeat tastes pretty goddamned nasty, but what you'll be experiencing will be much worse. It will be the knowledge that you're weak, mentally and physically. What's worse is that you'll have accepted that feeling. The feeling will always be with you. In the happiest moments of your life, it'll be there, lying under the surface like a malignant tumor. Ignore it at your own peril, Bob. "Don't look at me like that either. This just may be the best Christmas present you'll get this year. Next Christmas, Bob, when I see you again, I'm going to be a little bigger, a little stronger, and a little leaner. What will you be? Will you still be making excuses? This is a gift, Bob, from me to you. I'm giving you the chance to look fate in those pretty eyes of hers and say, 'Step off, bitch. This is my party and you're not invited.' What do you say, Bob? Monday, Christmas morning, 6am, my house. The ball's in your court." Okay, so maybe that's not the exact words I used with Bob, but you get the picture. Will Bob show up Monday? I don't know, but I kind of doubt it. In fact, Bob will probably take me off his Christmas card list. He probably thinks I've got "too much Testosterone," like that's a bad thing. I think Bob is just stuck in a rut, and as the saying goes, the only difference between a rut and a grave is depth. The way out of the rut is to make major changes in your life, most of which won't be too pleasant in the beginning. The opportunity to make those changes seldom comes as bluntly as I put it to Bob. Most of the time, that opportunity knocks very softly. What I did was basically give Bob a verbal slap in the face. You can react two ways to a slap. You can get angry at the person doing the slapping, or you can realize that he was just trying to get you to wake up and focus on what you really want and, more importantly, what it'll take to get it. If you're a regular T-mag reader, I doubt you need to be called out like Bob. But maybe you've caught yourself slacking a little here lately. Maybe you've missed a few workouts or maybe you started a little too early on the usual holiday feasting, like, say, back in September. Just remember that the time to start working on that summer body is now. The time to get rid of those bad habits that hold you back in the gym is now. You want to look totally different by next Christmas? Start now. This isn't because of the holidays or any corny New Year's resolutions either. The best time is always now. Christmas day I want you to enjoy being with your family and friends. I want you to open presents, sip a little eggnog and have a good meal. But if your regularily scheduled workout happens to fall on December 25th, what will you be doing at six o'clock that morning? That's what separates us from guys like Bob. Last edited by Plan9Senior; 10-07-2003 at 10:34 PM.. |
10-07-2003, 10:58 PM | #2 (permalink) |
Purple Monkey Dishwasher
Location: CFB Gagetown, NB, CANADA
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OK, I'm going to the gym NOW!
__________________
"If you're not weird, you're not interesting". I'm very interesting ... seizei; (adv - Japanese) at the most; at best; to the utmost; as much (far) as possible. (pronounced - say-zay) |
10-08-2003, 12:22 PM | #3 (permalink) |
Purple Monkey Dishwasher
Location: CFB Gagetown, NB, CANADA
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Seriously, that did give me a little spur of motivation. Call it egotistical, I don't care, but I get results.
__________________
"If you're not weird, you're not interesting". I'm very interesting ... seizei; (adv - Japanese) at the most; at best; to the utmost; as much (far) as possible. (pronounced - say-zay) |
10-09-2003, 11:04 PM | #6 (permalink) | |
Banned
Location: Orange County, California
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10-10-2003, 03:56 AM | #7 (permalink) | |
Fast'n'Bulbous
Location: Australia, Perth
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cool article though, liked it a lot and can relate, fortuantly ( i think?) on the testosterone kinda guy. |
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10-10-2003, 06:58 AM | #8 (permalink) |
Junkie
Location: Florida
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Very well put. And it definitely motivated me to work out a little harder when I go this evening.
I usually work 70 hours a week, and most days I'm lucky to get 5 or 6 hours of sleep. But I still make time to spend an hour at the gym every 2 or 3 days. If I can make time for it, damn near anyone can. |
10-10-2003, 07:37 AM | #9 (permalink) |
Junkie
Location: Reichstag
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neat read....i wish he told us if bob ever showed up....but i get the drift he prolly didnt
__________________
"....and when you men get home and face an anti-war protester, look him in the eyes and shake his hand. Then, wink at his girlfriend, because she knows she's dating a pussy." -General Franks |
10-10-2003, 02:15 PM | #10 (permalink) | |
Darth Papa
Location: Yonder
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When I took on the diet I'm on now, I was claiming my body back from the justifications and reasons and excuses that kept me looking and feeling the way I looked and felt. One week and 10 pounds later, it's a whole new ballgame for me. My life is different now. And it's not about the weight or the dieting. It's about who's going to be in charge of how life goes--the bag of Oreos, or the man? |
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10-11-2003, 06:43 AM | #11 (permalink) |
Junkie
Location: Reichstag
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i dont think he was saying it in a out of shape or fat way...i was think he means people are to lazy to post a comment.....
__________________
"....and when you men get home and face an anti-war protester, look him in the eyes and shake his hand. Then, wink at his girlfriend, because she knows she's dating a pussy." -General Franks |
10-13-2003, 01:10 AM | #12 (permalink) |
Follower of Ner'Zhul
Location: Netherlands
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For fun I did 10 pushups last night, just to see if I could still do it after being away from the gym for a year. And guess what, me, a 19 year old healthy guy could barely do 10 pushups and 30 situps. Whereas I would usually do 25 pushups and 50 situps a day easily before.
I need to get back to the gym. Thnx for the motivational slap in the face.
__________________
The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents. - Nathaniel Borenstein |
10-13-2003, 05:43 AM | #13 (permalink) |
Keep on rolling. It only hurts for a little while.
Location: wherever I am
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Time to get my ass off the couch and moving. I've been repeating over and over to myself its time to get in shape. I've definetly been Bob.
Not anymore. This is not going to be another hollow promise to myself. I'm gonna set-up the weight bench and fix the treadmill tonite. No more goof ing off in the evening.
__________________
So, what's your point? It's not an attitude, it's a way of life. |
10-13-2003, 01:19 PM | #14 (permalink) |
"Officer, I was in fear for my life"
Location: Oklahoma City
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Hello, my name used to be Bob!!
I've been telling myself for a while that I need to get in shape. This semester in one of my classes we have to do an 8 week behavior modification project. Mine was eating healthier and loosing weight. Had to switch lifestyles overnight. Started eating healthier and going to the gym first thing in the morning. So far, looks like I'm on the right track. In about 5 weeks I have lost 7 lbs. It would be more but I had to take a week off due to a knee injury. But, back to the grind. I feel lots better now as well. Here's some additional motivation, think about spending time with your kids and how active they will be. That's what I do. I want to be involved in my kids lives and if that means I need to be in better shape, then that's what I'm going to do. |
10-13-2003, 01:40 PM | #15 (permalink) |
Invisible
Location: tentative, at best
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You want more comments? Okay.
I'd rather be like Bob than be like the arrogant, condescending, holier-than-thou prick who wrote that article. IMO, criticizing others is a poor method of motivation. If I need motivation to go to the gym, I can just look at a picture of myself taken 6 months and 40 lbs. ago - I don't need to tear down someone else to feel good about myself. It's not about being better than Bob - it's about being better than I used to be. Your results may vary.
__________________
If you want to avoid 95% of internet spelling errors: "If your ridiculous pants are too loose, you're definitely going to lose them. Tell your two loser friends over there that they're going to lose theirs, too." It won't hurt your fashion sense, either. Last edited by yournamehere; 10-13-2003 at 01:43 PM.. |
10-13-2003, 06:23 PM | #17 (permalink) |
Invisible
Location: tentative, at best
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Yeah - I hate holier-than-thou types.
I'm better than them
__________________
If you want to avoid 95% of internet spelling errors: "If your ridiculous pants are too loose, you're definitely going to lose them. Tell your two loser friends over there that they're going to lose theirs, too." It won't hurt your fashion sense, either. |
10-13-2003, 07:37 PM | #19 (permalink) |
Junkie
Location: Michigan
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What about people that have never been fit? They can't look at old pictures of themselves. All they are, all they know is obescity. Its not about putting Bob down to feel better about yourself, its about trying to not be like Bob in the aspect of motivation and effort. Bob could be and probably is a good guy at heart. But sometimes it takes something like this to really wake you up.
And yes, I am definitley talking from personal experience =)
__________________
Go Pistons! |
10-13-2003, 11:52 PM | #20 (permalink) |
Junkie
Location: Oz
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Damn that was some angry shit. Inspirational too.
__________________
'And it's been a long December and there's reason to believe Maybe this year will be better than the last I can't remember all the times I tried to tell my myself To hold on to these moments as they pass' |
10-13-2003, 11:59 PM | #21 (permalink) | |
Banned
Location: Orange County, California
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12-15-2003, 11:57 PM | #23 (permalink) | |
Fast'n'Bulbous
Location: Australia, Perth
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hehe, nice bump. I read the article again, but i didn't realise there was quite a high degree of narcissism/vanity there? Which is good to some degree, but you can't get excessive about it (could turn into some kind of mental sickness, like anorexia or something?)
Anyway, here are some other motivaitons for strength training. I think the order is quite apt as well Quote:
http://www.longfellowclubs.com/strengthtraining.htm |
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12-16-2003, 06:45 PM | #24 (permalink) |
Existentialist
Location: New York City
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Plan9,
Thanks for the post. I really enjoyed reading it. In many ways I was once the Bob of old, but I decided to go for the change rather then sit back and be fat. For much of my life, like Bob, I would always complain how I was always fat, noone respected me, noone took me seriously, girls didn't look at me, etc. I would get winded walked up stairs. I just about hit rock bottom last December. I had been in the studio with my band recording our album and we had eaten fast food for a few weeks. I went into my mom's bathroom and stood on the scale. I weighed myself.... 198... HOLY SHIT! I'm 5'7, so 198 is A LOT. I was nearing the dreaded 200. That was the worst fear of my life. I have always been fat, but I didn't want to be morbidly obese. So that moment I decided it was time for a change. Although the initial efforts I went through might be frowned upon, it was a start. After a couple weeks of research, in January 2003 I decided to lose some weight via the Atkins diet. I did that diet for 4 months, and had gotten down to 180. At that point I figured I had lost enough weight to go back to eating regularly. At that point I started going to the gym a few times a week. Continue that until August. I moved to Manhattan in August. I looked around and saw so many skinny people and fit people, and I felt somewhat jealous. I figured, while I was 175, I was still overweight, but not obese. I wanted to "look good naked" in a nut shell. So I joined the NYSC on 14th street and said I'm going to do this hardcore. So I hired a personal trainer and a few months later here I am. From that point in August, I have religiously gone to the gym 6 days a week - always giving a full effort. I am down to 155, and many people have complimented me on how I look. When I started, I couldn't do 10 pushups or 20 situps. I couldn't even run a 12 minute mile. Now I can do 40/70 respecitively. I just ran a 16:20 2 mile. I've seen so much progress that a couple months ago, I've decided I was going to put my hard work to use and join the Army. I'm even thinking about Ranger School. Now looking back... 5'7 198.... to 5'7 155. I'm talking about being a Special Ops soldier for the Army, back then I probably couldn't be Salvation Army. For those of you looking for inspiration, it's there. I'm living proof that if you want something you can achieve it. I'm still not near where I want to be, but I'm getting there, and I WILL get there. Don't be like Bob. And to the gentleman that mentioned negativity doesn't work as motivation, it definitely did in my case. The fear of being obese was my motivation. But it all comes down to... DO YOU WANT IT?
__________________
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." - Dr. Seuss |
12-16-2003, 07:22 PM | #26 (permalink) | |
Existentialist
Location: New York City
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__________________
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." - Dr. Seuss |
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12-17-2003, 07:09 AM | #28 (permalink) |
Upright
Location: New Jersey
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Thanks
I used to be Mr. Testosterone, personal trainer, gym rat, good looking guy, 195 @ 4% body fat, and wanted a career in the fitness industry. Well, 10 years later, a couple of injuries, college degree in accounting, marriage, mortgage, and 2 kids I find myself looking like Bob. I put in a decent home gym about 5 years ago and I have been able to get in 100 to 150 workouts a year, but this may be the first year I don’t even hit the 100 mark. I have lost all motivation the last few months (5 to be exact), but after reading about Bob, I may have found a little something to keep me going.
I am new here and I already appreciate what I have seen on the board. Thanks |
12-17-2003, 08:44 AM | #29 (permalink) | |
Existentialist
Location: New York City
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__________________
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." - Dr. Seuss |
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12-17-2003, 12:51 PM | #30 (permalink) | |
Tilted
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12-17-2003, 01:25 PM | #31 (permalink) | |
Banned
Location: Orange County, California
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12-18-2003, 02:27 AM | #32 (permalink) | |
Purple Monkey Dishwasher
Location: CFB Gagetown, NB, CANADA
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Quote:
__________________
"If you're not weird, you're not interesting". I'm very interesting ... seizei; (adv - Japanese) at the most; at best; to the utmost; as much (far) as possible. (pronounced - say-zay) |
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12-18-2003, 11:44 AM | #33 (permalink) | |
Banned
Location: Orange County, California
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12-18-2003, 05:17 PM | #36 (permalink) |
Dubya
Location: VA
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Something that keeps me going lately is the dumbbell rack. On the left rack are all the weights that are 55+, on the right are the 50 and below. Every time I improve on one of my exercises enough to start taking weights from the left rack, I go "YES!" (in my head...)
__________________
"In Iraq, no doubt about it, it's tough. It's hard work. It's incredibly hard. It's - and it's hard work. I understand how hard it is. I get the casualty reports every day. I see on the TV screens how hard it is. But it's necessary work. We're making progress. It is hard work." |
12-18-2003, 06:24 PM | #38 (permalink) | |
Fast'n'Bulbous
Location: Australia, Perth
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Although theres also the aspect of not trying to look like you're showin' off too much as well, cause you might appear like a tool. I think thats another thing... You don't want to come across as too arrogant, although given your signatures and such you seem like a realtively assertive person -> Hello, can I slit your throat? Althogh given you're behind a computer and not in real life, i think it's easier to post and get comments on a forum, than to your face. Cause you don't have to deal with the embarrasment/anxiety or whatever immediatley... It's the same for me with excercising, i get embarrased if people are watching me (other than playing basketball or sport). That's part of the reason why i don't like to go to gyms, although mainly it's cause the music there wouldn't be too good, for me, to supplemnet my workout |
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12-18-2003, 06:48 PM | #39 (permalink) |
Banned
Location: Orange County, California
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http://www.fuct.com/ecommerce/images/fuct_ads/DEN.jpg
Fuct is a local clothing company... thats where I got that slogan... promise im not some psychopath or anything |
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