BuddyHawks

Different Spin.

I wouldn't want everyone to be sad so there would a big sledding party in my honor (if everything goes according to plan and I pass on in the winter). There should be some type of winter clothing with my picture on it that everyone could ware. Hotdogs would also be served.

YourNeverThere

Mine would be in the summer, outside if possable. Songs that would play: Talk Show Host by Radiohead, Angel by Massive Attack, Blue Movie by Snecker Pimps, and Everything In It's Right Place by Radiohead. Followed by a party with free wine and cigarettes

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The Above post is a direct quote from Shakespeare

ninety09

I don't see the point of them, so I don't really want one. I won't be there, so my family can do whatever the hell they want..
I don't understand when people say "I want that and that...", you'll be dead, you won't be there. *shrug*

Sparhawk

I thought Payne Stewart's memorial service back in '99 was very memorable: The mist, the bagpiper playing amazing grace... Something like that appeals to my sense of the aesthetic, but as the fellow mentioned above, I don't think I'll be in a position to care very much.

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"In Iraq, no doubt about it, it's tough. It's hard work. It's incredibly hard. It's - and it's hard work. I understand how hard it is. I get the casualty reports every day. I see on the TV screens how hard it is. But it's necessary work. We're making progress. It is hard work."

Dano069

I don't want a church funeral. My wife knows this so, it should be a gravesite service. I want the following music played, "I'll See You On The Other Side," by Ozzy; "Dreams," by VanHalen and "Amazing Grace" After that, let the drinking and partying begin. I'll be there, just not physically.

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I may look attentive, but I'm taking peeks down your blouse faster than the human eye can follow.

Cynthetiq

don't care... people can't just sit around and cry... should be a big party... because I'm finally finished.

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

yournamehere

As Bob Hope once said, "Oh - I don't know - surprise me."

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If you want to avoid 95% of internet spelling errors:
"If your ridiculous pants are too loose, you're definitely going to lose them. Tell your two loser friends over there that they're going to lose theirs, too."
It won't hurt your fashion sense, either.

Slims

A really big party with a really big.....bonfire.

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"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill

"All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

i_t_man

I want a viking funeral. No, seriously I told my wife to take the 10-15 thousand dollars she would spend on a funeral and have some fun, donate my body to science and have some students come pick up the body.

The funeral business is one of the biggest scams around.

Lebell

Oh, if reality were no constraint, I would want to be flash frozen and put in a capsule and be shot into deep space.

Just think about the possibilities. For one thing, you would truly go where no man had gone before, aliens could find you and you would be a huge scientific find for them, or maybe you would be found by humans in the far future and studied or revived, a la 3001, The Final Odysee.

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"Of all tyrannies, a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience." – C. S. Lewis

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Jonsgirl

I want to be cremated. I'd like to have a party instead of anything sad. I haven't given a lot of thought to anything beyond that. I think it's too depressing.

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Someday, someone will best me.
But it won't be today, and it won't be you.

World's King

You all have to get drunk as fuck and listen to good music.

None of this weepy shit... I want drunken fights, drunken sex...

I want an all out party.

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heavy is the head that wears the crown

j8ear

"You've made me so very happy"

By Blood Sweat and Tears....

Played at my Wedding and want it played at my funeral.

Then after after spreading my ashes at the top of Arapahoe Basin...

Chinese Downhill....ala Hot Dog the movie.

Winner gets to decide where the rest of the festivities will be. Most likely slope side, as A-Basin has a kick ass slope side party every single day.

Man I hope I die in late winter/early spring.

-bear

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It's alot easier to ask for forgiveness then it is to ask for permission.

Speed_Gibson

very simple - use a simple but decent looking wooden box straight from the 19th century and feel free to skip the bullshit "what a good friend/father/etc" session.
No point in spending 10k or more on a box that is just a fancy wrapper for bugfood anyway. Spend some of the money on a live cheap dixie band and make it a celebration of a life well lived without too many tears or morbid reflecting.

present_future

Songs that would be played
"Blackbird" and "The Long and Winding Road" both by The Beatles
"Good Riddance" by Green Day
It would just be a gathering of my closest family and friends. I don't want a big fuss made about me.

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The only thing I'll ever ask of you... you gotta promise not to stop when I say when.

sexymama

Cremation – thrown in the Pacific Ocean (preferably in Hawaii). Have a celebration of my life, rather than a morning of my death.

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If you can go deeply into lovemaking, the ego disappears. That is the beauty of lovemaking, that it is another source of a glimpse of god

It's not about being perfect; it's about developing some skill at managing imperfection.

mirevolver

I would have the preist give a long dull drawn-out eulogy that is at least 2 hours long.

Why would I do this? Because I'm dead. I won't have to listen to it.

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Aside from my great plans to become the future dictator of the moon, I have little interest in political discussions.

Journeyman

Finnegan's Wake. Naturally, I'd *like* to get up and bitch everyone out for thinking I'm dead, but if I'm really dead, I still want Finnegan's Wake scenario at my funeral. Or wake. Or both. Maybe both... definitely both.

hawkeye

I want something creative, and so sick that people who don't understand my sense of humor will be horrified.

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You're not fat,
You're just a giant ball
of love, covered in anger.

tinfoil

A friend of mine died suddenly. His house was paid off and his wife didn't want to live their anymore. His insurance ensured she would be able to buy another house free and clear. So, in a nutshell, she didn't care about the condition of the house nor contents. Soooo....

She invited everyone he knew over and told them to invite other people who they felt should go. It was a huge party at a farm house. It was great, and out of respect (I assume) no one destroyed anything which is a shock considering there was easily 150 people. He would have loved it.

Man, makes me misty just thinking about it, but that's how I want mine to go.

Oh ya, and I want burial at sea.

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Get off your fuckin cross. We need the fuckin space to nail the next fool martyr.

mattevil

new orlens funeral procession with the band playing saints go marchin in would be neat.

inkriminator

"And the other thing i'm gonna do at my funeral is that I'm gonna have a closed casket, and it's closed, so everybody will think i'm in there, but it won't be my body will come down onwires! It will just come down, just hang down, and then they'll hit the lights out, hit it with strobes light, and then techno music."

Nick Swardson, hilarious stand-up, doing his bit about his funeral.

yoshi

Never thought about it. I guess I would want people to sit around and laugh at the memories of me being silly. My parents used to tease me about being like Mallory on Family Ties.

ForgottenKnight

LOL!!! GREAT!

I would have a funeral service like they do in Star Trek...where at the end they would launch my body in a torpedo case into space.

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"People say I'm strange, does that make me a stranger?"

viejo gringo

Cremation---remember as I was when you loved me best,
not as I am now...

ShaniFaye

question before I answer....do people still do wakes with the body at home? I remember that a lot from when I was a kid.

I want one of those dracula shaped coffins lined in a green silk like fabric and I want to be buried wearing dark green flannel jammies and my penguin house shoes, no jewelry and my hair in french braid (god I've put too much though into this hehe) and all the pall bearers have to be in battle kilts

At my service I want Fly to the Angels by Slaughter and Cry No More by Arcade played...at the cemetary I want pipers playing Amazing Grace as I'm carried to the graveside.

Afterwards I want all my friends to have a keg party and to have just one person get drunk enuff to forget and holler out "Faye, take a picture of me!!" (that makes more sense if you know that in my circles I'm known as the person who records all the stupid shit on camera)



whew I dont want much do I?

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I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!

koli70

This makes me think of that commercial, someone in a hurse while another one bites the dust plays on the radio. lol. I'd want that played at my funeral.

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Woman is a danger cat

meff

None. I don't think I really want a funeral.

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Toy-like people make me boy-like.

Shyla Loral

I don't want one. But I do want a wake. I want my friends to get together, eat pizza and get drunk and talk about how wonderful I was. Oh, and to eat donuts.

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"Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead" Ben Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac.

Meff r0x

guthmund

All you can eat buffet; Neverending beer keg

and big freakin' round table so they can all sit around and laugh at all the stupid shit I've done and call me names.

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No signature. None. Seriously.

wry1

The concept of me in a church - for my own funeral, of all things - is quite ludicrous! They would probably have to re-bless the place after it was over.....

Nope! I want to be cremated, or else let my loved ones donate my body to science-fiction (thank you Rodney Dangerfield for giving me the idea....). I'm not one for a funeral service, and especially not one where organized religion (aka "The Mafia" nowadays) is involved.

Here's what I think should be done: Make 3 to 4 thousand Jello-shots, get about 50 bottles of Jagermeister, and proceed to get well and truly blitzed. Once that's done, tell every sordid tale about me that's ever been heard (true or not, I won't care.....Really!) and then drink some more.

And raffle off my urn with the ashes. Make it a door-prize or something.

sigma1042

i want to be cremated and the service to be everyone that cares, friends, family, etc, to tell stories about me (similar to most services) but i don't want a full church service just a simple blessing

i want my ashes to be distributed to many diff friends and family members in small vials they can carry and leave a little bit of me all over as they have fun experiences so part of me can be there too
there are a couple places that i def want to be, and no one will notice just a little dust and pieces of me in the great baseball and football stadiums throughout the country

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[Arthur] HA HA HA HA, It's a little joke![/Arthur]

Charlatan

When I buried my Dad I found out just how expensive bloody funerals can be...

I don't want anything in a funeral home... no casket... nothing. I'm dead so what's the point.

As a memorial I would just like a big party. The kind of party I always want to attend but never seem to find the time to attend anymore... Booze, sex, mighty yawps all around...

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"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

motdakasha

If I could determine what would happen after my death, I wouldn't have a funeral. I would get cremated and thrown away.

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=^-^= motdakasha =^-^=
Just Google It.
BA Psychology & Photography
(I'm not going psychoanalyze you nor will I let you cry on my shoulder. Have a nice day.)

GakFace

Lively.
Bright colors. Everyone should be wearing bright colors. Screw the this black crap. I thought I should be celebrating one's life, not mourning that they are gone. I want the same. Have some good upbeat music playing, maybe even pizza As for me, I'd like to be wearing a blindingly bright colored Suit.. like Neon Green. They'd open the casket (if i'm not creamated) to look at me, and at that point the casket light (which was replaced with a super bright halogen ) shines down on my suit, which in turn blinds them.. That'd be a lot easier than trying to spring load my back with the coffin every time someone opened it up

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RoboBlaster:
Welcome to the club! Not that I'm in the club. And there really isn'a a club in the first place. But if there was a club and if I was in it, I would definitely welcome you to it.

baaa

I would just like there to be a lot of people there.
To show that I had made a difference in many lives

SabrinaFair

All I want is everyone who cares about me to gather in a bar somewhere, raise their glasses, and say, "Here's to Sabrina. She lived a good life." I don't give a rat's ass what they do with my body--cremate it, bury it, donate it so science, whatever. Just *don't* sit in a room with it and comment on how "natural" it looks.

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"With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy."
-Desiderata

Damnfinn

I asked a friend to play Eric Burton and the Animals, "We Got Get Out Of This Place" at a catered party for me. Oh, and to be spring loaded so I can sit up half through the service, plus place a Pepsi in my hand.

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I was told to get a life, but all the good ones were taken.

bundy

i kind of liked Diana´s funeral.
guess that could be a wee bit expensive for my family, what with having to pay for the millions of people turning out to line the route taken by my funeral procession.


no, seriously, i´d want everyone to have a picnic at some lovely spot. perhaps even the Govenors lawn on Norfolk Island.
the champagne would be flowing and the seafood would be fresh. everyone would be wearing lovely, light summery outfits. there´d be tears, and laughter. all of my good friends would be there. they´d all say a little something, be it a poem, a song, a memory or a wish. there´d be a great little jazz band, playing sweet, light classics, such as cheek to cheek. everyone would dance, smile and cry tears of love and of sadness.

then, later, i´d have my ashes sprinkled in the snowy mountains (southern NSW). in a special spot. a few days hike in. a place where friends and family could come and visit when they hiked through.

thats what i´d want.

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Ohayo!!!

Kyo

I don't want a funeral. A waste of time, effort and money. I'm dead - burn the body and move on, thank you, have a good day. I don't want people standing up and trying hard to say something good about me. I don't want people to talk about me in past tense. Once I'm dead, that's the end of my story.

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Sure I have a heart; it's floating in a jar in my closet, along with my tonsils, my appendix, and all of the other useless organs I ripped out.