Baraka_Guru

No, it doesn't work that way. The thing about an ideal's worthiness is that it must sit well with you and those around you. Your ideals should be a positive force. It might help to think of it this way: you can't be successful in a vacuum. You become successful by being of service to others. In return you are given rewards for your service. It's a concept that's difficult to refute. It's also rather basic. You need to fill in the particulars. How are you going to be of service to others? You need to provide something of value, just be sure it's on the good side of the law.

It's about taking a wide view: you have something valuable to offer those around you. If you don't feel this is quite the case, then a worthy ideal would be to work towards getting the skills and knowledge that would be of value to others and then offering them.

There's nothing shallow in wanting to be financially independent. It's shallow if you get it by selling crack to grade 8s. It's not shallow if you retire a millionaire by operating a lawn care business in your community (or whatever). You will get what you want out of life if you give others what they want.

You need to find out what makes you tick, what gets you going, what you're truly good at and enjoy doing. Then you figure out ways to offer it to people who need it and will pay for it. That's how societies and economies work. There's nothing shallow about it. You give them what they want, and they give you what you want upon mutual agreement.

Do this one step at a time and you'll be moving towards a worthy ideal.

---------- Post added at 08:55 PM ---------- Previous post was at 08:54 PM ----------

The point is, ladies and gentlemen, that greed---for lack of a better word---is good.

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

Plan9

Sometimes you just have to drink yourself into a whiskey coma watching Law & Order reruns for two months before you're ready to get all We Are What We Do. If Eddie38 wants to throw a temper tantrum online and question his entire future, I'm all for it. I did it and it worked for me. Go for it, bro.

I think all too often we approach problems as if they are supposed to be overcome immediately. Sometimes no right-now action is required in order to create the kind of action you want in the future. Just "sleep on it." Or in this case: "Have a drink on me." And get over it. Get some, get some, go again. What are the steps of recovery according to my freshman psych text? Whatever. The point is that sometimes wallowing in your own vomit is the right answer. Eddie is going through a hard time and maybe he just wants to beat on himself a little bit. I'm all for embracing the funk. It's perfectly natural.

My advice isn't for everybody. I was fired from numerous suicide hotlines because I told them if they couldn't find value in their life that I couldn't either.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Eddie38

Dude, honestly, I couldn't care less about this society or this economy. Screw it. You say I'm supposed to serve other people? So...just the ones in this society? What about the other societies on earth? Do they deserve my service or am I supposed to just feed the hive right here in America? Feed the capitalist hive and the shallow, materialistic lifestyles of our citizens...the greater good of my country, nationalism and all that bullshit.

So I mow the lawn of some guys mcmansion and he pays me $100, big deal. So he got his stupid grass cut and I made enough to pay my cell phone bill. That's success? Meanwhile people are starving in other countries. But, there's not really any money to be made in feeding starving people and it doesn't exactly further the aims of the Corporate agenda of enslavement here is the West(our society and economy). So...I dunno.

But I guess if I can make a million dollars cutting grass...well, that's success. Yippee. But I need to find out what makes me tick. Well, money doesn't make me tick so...I guess I'm screwed?

One thing is for sure, there's no shortage of people willing to impose their ideals onto me.

Plan9

For as depressed as you are, you're certainly not being very selfish. Consider this an area to improve.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Eddie38

Thanks. I'll be sure to get right on that.

Pearl Trade

Spilled my Gatorade on that one. Good job.

This thread is awesome. All kinds of fun tangents and arguments. I approve.

I don't understand what exactly Eddie wants. But I'll offer the simple fact (we all know this) that you must fix yourself before you get a woman. You say money doesn't make you tick, but you put it in the title, so it must be important to you, as it should be. Start putting more value on yourself and what you own, good things will happen. Digging your hole deeper should be avoided as well.

A simple order of things: job>money>car>woman. Those are arrows, not "greater than" signs, by the way. You will find happiness, whatever that is to you, along the way. Take it slow and easy, man.

I think I was just thrown off by Plan9's comic genius, but was suicide ever a thought in your process, Eddie? 'Cause I have a great quote that needs using...

__________________

Our revenge will be the laughter of our children.
Give me convenience or give me death!

Cynthetiq

You get to decide. That's the point that you're missing.

But so far at the very beginning of this discussion in the OP and for a number of the responses, you weren't willing to make any decision or take any action that you were willing to even share or discuss here.

Suddenly last week you made this plan to go to Africa, and suddenly you had a contract.

Things really kind of don't happen as suddenly as you make them seem, they germinate as an idea and turn into something.

__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

Eddie38

Now this, I can do. I've been busting my ass since college, working, making money, acquiring material goods and...I'm tired. And all those goods I acquired...now they're serving me. I can sell them and just...rest and relax and do what I want. People don't rest enough. They don't slow down enough because they're too busy worrying about bills and mortgages and all that shit. Well, I'm not going to live like that anymore.

I'm going to rest whenever I feel like for however long I feel like and no one is going to make me feel guilty about it. If I want to take 5 years off from work, I will do it. Just because others are lead through life by some crazy work ethic and some materialistic ideal doesn't mean I have to be. If you want more money and more stuff, that's your business, but I don't. I'm not gonna end up 80 years old with a bunch of money and a bunch of stuff just because I've spent my miserable life pursuing some bullshit capitalist ideal. And the next woman I get hooked up with is either going to share my viewpoint or she can continue on her merry old golddigging way.

MSD

money can't buy happiness, but poverty will make you miserable. If nothing else, zone out at work to the greatest extent you can while getting the job done and try to figure out what will make you happy and how you can get there. Under my prior sarcasm was an honest suggestion: you are depressed, you have a very good reason to be, and if you can talk to a psychiatrist you can get some guidance in the right direction.

One thing I can say with absolute certainty is that you do not want to feel the way you feel, and another is that nobody deserves to feel the way you feel. The cruel irony is that people in your situation often can't make it out on their own, but only they can do what it takes to get themselves out of it.

If you have any further questions about my reading comprehension abilities, I can dig into the old files and start scanning my standardized test results.

Plan9

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Baraka_Guru

Then pick another one. Again, you have to make choices and follow through.

No. You haven't fully understood what I've been telling you. It doesn't have to be about money; I only used that as an example. If you want to work for a nonprofit for a cause you care about and just earn a modest salary, then go to it. Either way, you're providing a service and you're getting something out of it (a living and the satisfaction of doing something good that you truly believe in).

If you're sick with materialism and capitalism, blah, blah, blah, then do something about it. Come up with your worthy ideal that isn't about getting stuff. Don't take one or two of my examples and think that's all there is.

When the time comes, you will be able to sit down and really think about what you want. When you decide what that is, go for it.

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

Eddie38

Why? I don't have to let the society dictate how I live. I can live however I want. In fact...maybe that's the "worthy ideal" that I will pursue: to achieve my desired lifestyle in spite of the pressure to join our greedy, shallow, fat society.

Baraka_Guru

Um, that's what I've been trying to tell you.

You're on the right track.

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

dlish

Eddie, i see classic examples of your depressive state in pretty much every post you make. Pretty much every post from the feeling sorry for yourseflf attitude, to the running away to another country, to telling the next woman that its your way or its the highway. do yourself a favour and see a professional.

what my take on baraka is trying to say is that you need to find something you think is worthwhile and pursue it. something that will provide a service to others and bring about a positive outsome to humanity and satisfaction to yourself in the service you provided...and NO, before you tell me that an old pedo man giving lollies to a 6 year old is acceptable, no its not because there is no positive outcome in that 'worthy' cause. nor was there any in hitler's massacre of millions of people. it may be as small as helping the elderly at old people homes, to building houses in africa for habitat for huminaty etc. it may have no monetary value, but it may mean something to you and give you the satsfaction that you're doing something.

what i really dont get though, and what really doesnt add up is how a broken truck will buy you a ticket to south africa and allow you to stay there for a considerable amount of time. some things arent adding up here, and i think that you're not letting on to your real situation.

i also suggest that if you decide to not come back and take up this contract that you be fair to those people and tell them that you're not taking up the job. when and if you decide.

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Eddie38

You haven't been following closely enough to catch all the details. My truck threw a rod awhile back but I got it fixed. I posted earlier about it. It's a nice truck, I think brand new I paid almost $50k for it. It's only 6 years old so I think I can fetch at least $15k-$20K for it. 4X4, leather, 1 ton, turbo diesel, cd player, 5th wheel hitch, 75K miles. You interested?

---------- Post added at 10:52 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:51 PM ----------

But mine is sort of the anti-ideal.

dlish

you're right. i skimmed parts of this thread because plenty of people gave you sound advice and you continually discounted them. it became tedious for me to see you continually shoot down good advice - scroll-scroll-scroll - [read last few exchanges]. its like watching the days of our lives... you leave it for a good 6 months and you can stick pick up where you left.

am i interested in your truck? do you ship to the middle east ? shipping on your account of course

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Plan9

Is it a Cummins or a Duramax?

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Eddie38

I apologize profusely for subjecting you to my tedium. I prostrate myself before you and beg forgiveness.

---------- Post added at 11:07 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:05 PM ----------

Naw, it's a Ford so it's the PowerStroke 6liter made by International.

dlish

i didnt ask for your humble apology. i was merely telling you why i missed that part of the thread.You dont need to blow things out of proportion....maybe thats the tend im seeing in your posts. im assuming thats your defence mechanism for dealing with things...

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Eddie38

So, my posts are tedious, I'm too stupid to take perfectly good advice, I offer apologies even when they weren't requested, I blow things out of proportion which is actually a defense mechanism. Wow. I'm so glad you chose me to bestow your enlightenment(veiled insults and passive aggressiveness) upon. If you didn't live in the middle east maybe we could sit down over coffee and discuss further my areas of ineptitude.

dlish

maybe we could meet while im in africa in about 8 weeks time. i'd love to give you my piece of mind

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Eddie38

Sounds good. PM me the details. I will wait with bated breath.

Martian

Dude. You came into our house. You started a thread on this forum about how much your life sucks. And whether or not you see it, virtually everything since has been people trying to help you. Offering advice, offering solidarity, putting our collective wisdom at your disposal. We've all of us been through hard times. We've dealt with these issues. Some of us continue to deal with them.

And all you've done is shit on the people who've tried to be helpful. Told us all how hard it is and how we just don't understand and how you're different and unique and a beautiful snowflake and we don't remember or we don't get it or we don't comprehend or we don't understand. Quit working for the man, man! I'm not like all you corporate peons, I need to feed the soul! This is totally not me spiralling into depression and I'll heal miraculously without putting work into it because I know better than everyone, even the people who have had depression hit very close to home and know what's effective and what isn't!

Whatever, man. It's been hostility and petty aggression straight down the line. So yeah, twenty different permutations of the same exchange twenty times in a row gets pretty goddamn tedious.

I still think you're just looking for guests to your pity party, but the bottom line is that's just now how we operate here.

The highlight of this thread for me is when Cynthetiq characterized MSD and I as compassionate. I can only assume he was trying to make a point.

__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame

Eddie38

I feel like every time you post I need to offer you a tissue or something. Get a hold of yourself. This new territoriality and speaking on behalf of the whole forum thing is a bit disturbing. Are you on drugs?

Martian

I do want to make one thing perfectly clear, here -- I'm not losing any sleep over how you choose to fuck up your life. I bowed out of that particular aspect of this discussion over a page ago, when it became clear to me that you weren't really interested in anything anyone here had to say. My sole issue with you now is how you're choosing to address my community, and my friends.

Yes, I'm speaking on behalf of the community. My community. The one that I've been a part of for better than half a decade. The one that I've been a part of through all kinds of hardships, including some that didn't look all that different from your own. Maybe to you this place is just a bunch of random internet screennames, but for those of us who've been here for years and who've gotten to know each other it's not the case. We are friends, we are lovers, we are close in ways that you're clearly not grasping. And if you knew that, if you understood the dynamics of this place and who we are, you might understand that I'm not the one who will sit around passively while you shit all over this space that we've worked hard to turn into a friendly, welcoming and intimate little corner of the worldwide web.

I don't get you. You're not hostile like this in chat. I don't even care if you like me as a person. Universal approval is not and has not ever been my goal. I just don't get why you're being so adversarial with the rest of the group. Why even start a discussion if you're not interested in having it?

The bottom line is that this is the way things work around here. If you can be respectful and approach things with an open mind you'll fit in. If not then please, don't feel like you have to stick around on my account.

__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame

Eddie38

Here's your tissue....and a fresh tampon. Feel free to continue your blubbering, I'm already feeling better about myself.

Cynthetiq

---

-+-{Important TFP Staff Message}-+- We've got some passive aggressive flaming and borderline trolling, and no more discussion about the OP I guess this thread is done.

__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.