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08-24-2010, 03:20 PM
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#41 (permalink) |
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still, wondering.
Location: South Minneapolis, somewhere near the gorgeous gorge
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One time I farted and it sounded exactly like what was coming out of my mouth.
Witnesses were none the wiser.
__________________
BE JUST AND FEAR NOT 
Last edited by Ourcrazymodern?; 08-24-2010 at 03:22 PM.. |
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08-25-2010, 01:13 AM
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#42 (permalink) | |
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Done freeloading here
Location: on my ass :) - Norway
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Quote:
One time I farted and it sounded like diarrhea...  One time I farted while alone in the woods...and I'm still not sure if it made a sound.
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The future ain't what it used to be. |
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08-25-2010, 10:50 AM
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#43 (permalink) |
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Minion of the scaléd ones
Location: Northeast Jesusland
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One time I farted and it sounded like the trumpet that heralds the end of the yuga.
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Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. |
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08-25-2010, 11:49 AM
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#44 (permalink) | |
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Une petite chou
Location: With All Your Base
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One time I farted and it sound like the Happy Birthday Song...
__________________
Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House Quote:
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
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08-25-2010, 12:21 PM
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#45 (permalink) |
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Minion of the scaléd ones
Location: Northeast Jesusland
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One time I farted and it sounded like Brian Blessed clearing his throat.
This other time I farted and it sounded like Rush Limbaugh speaking his mind.
__________________
Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. |
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09-03-2010, 02:48 AM
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#46 (permalink) |
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comfortably numb...
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
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I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me. Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod...
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it. |
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09-03-2010, 07:22 AM
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#47 (permalink) | |
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Junkie
Location: At my daughter's beck and call.
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Quote:
okay, that made me chortle out loud. Awesome fart joke, Uncle Phil!!!
__________________
Propaganda is to a democracy what the bludgeon is to a totalitarian state. -Noam Chomsky Love is a verb, not a noun. -My Mom The function of genius is to furnish cretins with ideas twenty years later. -Louis Aragon, "La Porte-plume," Traite du style, 1928 |
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09-03-2010, 06:36 PM
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#48 (permalink) |
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With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much
Location: left side of my couch, East Texas
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One time I farted and it sounded like a chainsaw winding up.
One time I farted and it sounded like dialing Jenny at 867-5309. One time I farted and it sounded like Hephaestus' hammer ringing on his anvil. One time I farted and it sounded like a gerbil stuck in Richard Gere's ass. One time I farted and it sounded like a house telling me to get out.
__________________
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09-03-2010, 06:53 PM
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#49 (permalink) |
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warrior bodhisattva
Super Moderator
Location: East-central Canada
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One time I farted and it sounded like....
Another time I farted and it sounded like....
__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing? —Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön Humankind cannot bear very much reality. —From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot |
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09-05-2010, 04:40 AM
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#50 (permalink) |
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comfortably numb...
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
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__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it. |
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09-07-2010, 02:11 AM
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#51 (permalink) |
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comfortably numb...
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
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no one is listening until you fart...
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it. |
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09-07-2010, 10:10 AM
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#52 (permalink) |
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Minion of the scaléd ones
Location: Northeast Jesusland
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One time I farted and it sounded like an Indian Knockoff of a Harley magically shrunk down to 1/32 scale.
__________________
Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. |
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09-08-2010, 02:11 AM
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#53 (permalink) |
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comfortably numb...
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
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when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart...
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it. |
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| farted, sounded, time |
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