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Old 06-26-2005, 06:43 PM   #1 (permalink)
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What are the rules of cell phone etiquette and usage?

Three incidents from the past couple of weeks made me think of this.

First incident: I'm teaching a class in Children's literature during the summer session. At the beginning of the first part of the first class period, I go over procedures and class policies, including that for cell phones. The procedure is simple: Turn off cell phones before class begins. Half an hour into the first class session, a woman's cell phone rings in her purse. She fumbles to get it out of her purse, I assume to turn it off. Instead, she gets it out and takes the call during class. It escalated from there, but that's a story for another thread.

This is just one example; it happens quite often in my middle school classes, also. My college students usually get it the first time; it takes a few confiscated cell phones and detentions for the middle schoolers to understand. Some remain unmoved even to the end of the year.

Second incident: Grace and I are watching Batman Begins, in a theater with stadium seating, where each row is elevated a foot or so higher than the row in front of it. About ten minutes into the movie, a someone in one of the early rows flips open his cell phone. When you do this, the screen is clearly visible to every person sitting anywhere behind you. A voice from my right, a middle-aged man calls out, "Shut off the cell phone." No response from down front, so about 10 seconds later, "Shut off the cell phone!" The cell phone goes dark. I was ready to cheer.

When the movie ended the young gentleman who had the cell phone, dressed in gang chic clothing approached and confronted the man who had told him to shut off his phone, telling him [and I'm trying to quote exactly here] "Yo, dude, that was really rude. I wasn't doin' nothing. It's just my cell. You shouldn't have been on me like that."

The man calmly said, "Well, I guess there was rudeness on both sides then."

"Yo man, it's just my cell. I wasn't doing nothin'. It's just my cell."

"Your phone was visible to everyone in the theater. It's distracting. You should use you phone outside the theater."

"What? You want me to miss the movie? I wasn't talkin' or nothin'. It's just my cell. I wasn't doin' nothin'"

They were walking as this conversion went on, the man clearly trying to get away, the youth following him. The man tried to explain that the bright screen of a cell phone is distracting in the dark theater, and it might have been prudent to leave the theater to take his call. The youth's positions seemed to be that he wasn't doing nothing, it was just his cell. Fortunately for all involved, there was a passal of security guards there that day, patrolling outside the Batman theater, who approached the youth and the middle-aged man, which encouraged the youth to retreat and let the incident go.

Third incident: While watching Land of the Dead yesterday, I notice a cell phone screen pop up in the first row, followed by the woman holding it getting up and walking over to the tunnel, where I assume she took the call or text message or whatever. This proceeded to happen two or three more times. The third time I could hear her talking in the tunnel, and several people down low shushing her.

These last two incidents are typical of theater experiences. A few years ago, the problem was cell phones ringing in the theater, which would happen literally every time we went to the theater. Now people seem to have gotten the message that a ringing phone is a big distraction, and it only happens about every third time. The big problem now is the bright screens popping up in the dark.

Fourth incident: As I'm sitting at a stoplight waitinf for the light to change, a car pulls up on my left, and as I glance over, I see the woman driving, head down, looking at her phone, which is in one hand as the other dials or operates it--neither her hands on the wheel nor her eyes on the road, with her car still moving.

I would like to propose some general rules for cell phone usage.

I'll start with these three:

1. When you are in class turn your cell phone off. Using it during class time is rude to the teacher, and distracts you from learning what it is you are supposed to be learning. It also can be used to cheat, in a variety of ways.

2. When you are in a theater, turn your cell phone off. The cell phone is both visually and aurally distracting. Using it in either way is distracting and rude. If for some reason, you feel the need to make a call, get up, leave the theater, and do it outside. Your desire not to miss the movie does not take precedence over the right of the other patrons not to be distracted by your choice to use your phone during the movie.

3. When your car is on the road, your cell phone should be off. If you need to make a call, pull off the road and make your call with your car parked. Taking a call shouldn't be an issue, because your cell should be off.

Discussion, modification, or additions are welcome.
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Old 06-26-2005, 06:53 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Here there's signs posted in the lobby for people to shut off their cell phones. If you use one while seated in the theatre, you will be asked to leave the building. The ushers are very prompt with this. This rocks. *thumbs up*

I totally agree that phones should not be used in a classroom setting. There is no need for this.
As for the driving, people should not talk while their vehicle is moving. Of course, the problem is everyone thinks that they are the exception to the rule. In this case they should follow themselves driving & talking on the phone. When they see themselves all over the place maybe they will clue in.
But I doubt it. I'm afraid this will be a public battle for some time, look how long it took to get people not to smoke in public places.
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Old 06-26-2005, 06:55 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Generally anyone with common sense, and any hint of kindness to another the first two rules there are general law. Those who cannot follow those are often going to require a more extreme way of learning to follow common courtesy.

The third while I feel would be a great idea, just isnt always practical. New York state has laws where you cannot use a cell phone in any running vehicle. This includes the fact that you can be ticketed if you are sitting on the side of the road with the vehicle running. I wish more states were like this, harsh laws teach best.
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Old 06-26-2005, 06:56 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Demeter
I'm afraid this will be a public battle for some time, look how long it took to get people not to smoke in public places.
You make it sound like that battle is over. I only wish it was.
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Old 06-26-2005, 07:10 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I think the first two are dead-on, and (should be) obvious to anyone. I really wish people just understood some modicum of basic manners...I pretty much feel that in any public place where people are obviously trying to keep the noise level down, or else someone is performing/instructing/etc - phones should be off, or on vibrate at the most.

The calling the car thing I'm less worried about, if you 1. have a speakerphone, 2. have a headset.

edit: ps. sounds like someone needed to rant
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Old 06-26-2005, 07:10 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gilda
I would like to propose some general rules for cell phone usage.

I'll start with these three:

1. When you are in class turn your cell phone off. Using it during class time is rude to the teacher, and distracts you from learning what it is you are supposed to be learning. It also can be used to cheat, in a variety of ways.

2. When you are in a theater, turn your cell phone off. The cell phone is both visually and aurally distracting. Using it in either way is distracting and rude. If for some reason, you feel the need to make a call, get up, leave the theater, and do it outside. Your desire not to miss the movie does not take precedence over the right of the other patrons not to be distracted by your choice to use your phone during the movie.

3. When your car is on the road, your cell phone should be off. If you need to make a call, pull off the road and make your call with your car parked. Taking a call shouldn't be an issue, because your cell should be off.

Discussion, modification, or additions are welcome.
1) My cell phone is on during class time regardless whether it is lecture, or an exam. Simply because if I deem the phone call important (i'm not talking about "OMG MY BEST FRIEND CALLED I NEED TO ANSWER THE PHONE" as opposed to "my family is calling me, and this never happens at this time of day, therefore there is probably something I need to know") I may need to leave the class or exam to take it. However, my phone is ALWAYS on vibrate during these settings and to see who it is, I take it out of my pocket and view the screen on the outside my phone. If it is important, I walk out, if not, back into the pocket letting it vibrate.

2) Same as number 1.

3) Agree with number 3 fully. My cellphone is on for the same reasons as stated above. In this case, I WILL take a call from a friend. However, regardless of who calls, I find the closest parking lot, or place where I can stop to take the call.

I just can't stand people driving while talking on cellphones. Where I live, the people (including myself probably) are (for the most part) crappy drivers. We don't need something else to take away your concentration.
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Old 06-26-2005, 07:28 PM   #7 (permalink)
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After reading your post, listening to cell phones don't seem that bad.
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Old 06-26-2005, 07:46 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I agree except on the last one. I use my cell phone regularly on the phone. If I'm worried about something all it takes is a "hold on" and both hands are on the wheel and I'm concentrating 100% on the road. Mind you I'm only 18, but I've yet to have a car accident and I feel pretty safe driving when I'm talking.
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Old 06-26-2005, 07:54 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gatorade Frost
I agree except on the last one. I use my cell phone regularly on the phone. If I'm worried about something all it takes is a "hold on" and both hands are on the wheel and I'm concentrating 100% on the road. Mind you I'm only 18, but I've yet to have a car accident and I feel pretty safe driving when I'm talking.
I really dont mean to nit pick , but its usually that attitude that causes such accidents for teen related car wrecks. Sure we can all just say hold on, and go 2 hand approach at will. But if somthing split second happens, there is no way in hell you'll be able to react nearly as well as if you were not on the phone.
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Old 06-26-2005, 07:57 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
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cell phones in cars should be against the law EVERYWHERE. i almost got run over last week because a fucking woman didnt think it was important to look to see if anyone was crossing... but it was more important to talk on the fucking phone. i tell you, if i had a gun... IF...

edit: i do not own a cell phone. i will never own a cell phone. it's the most useless thing. just another distraction. i see ppl playing games, taking pictures and telling ppl where they are. WHO GIVES A SHIT?

i take the bus and i see ppl calling to tell [family or friends] that they're on the bus on their way home... you couldnt wait 5min you fucking retard?!

oh btw:
rule #4: if your phone makes little beeeeping sounds, you will turn it off after 9 beeps. 9 = 555-555-5555 enough to make the call. you will not test out every ring tones, you will not play pong, and YOU WILL NOT send text message with the fucking BBEEEEEEPS on.
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Old 06-26-2005, 07:58 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Destrox
I really dont mean to nit pick , but its usually that attitude that causes such accidents for teen related car wrecks. Sure we can all just say hold on, and go 2 hand approach at will. But if somthing split second happens, there is no way in hell you'll be able to react nearly as well as if you were not on the phone.
Agreed. At least get a hands free set. While it still does kinda irk me when I see someone talking on the phone with a hands free set (because it DOES take away your concentration), at least I know their hands are on the wheel.
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Old 06-26-2005, 08:02 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I'm guilty of having my phone on on the theatre and talking on the road. However, I bought a headset for my phone specifically for use on the road, which allows me to keep both hands on the wheel and my eyes on the road. I'll dial at a traffic light if it's red and I'm stopped, but frequently glancing up at the light to make sure it stays red. If I receive a call in the theatre or at a meeting or what have you and I absolutely have to take it, I'll step outside.

I'm not sure I'd fault the woman who stepped into the hall, as she was outside the theatre and likely just didn't realize she could still be heard. The other two are inexcusable.
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Old 06-26-2005, 08:03 PM   #13 (permalink)
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My position on cell phones is, I think, logical and can be understood by answering the following question:

"What did everyone do before the widespread use of cell phones?"

The world wasn't crying out for an end to land-line slavery. I think we were all just fine. Which one of the following problems seem trivial to you?

-cancer
-AIDS
-world hunger
-genocides
-the worldwide rich/poor divide
-lack of affordable widespread portable telecommunication devices
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Old 06-26-2005, 08:06 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I don't mind the nit picking. I'm just sure enough in my driving that I feel I can do it comfortably. If I'm ever in a car accident because I was talking on the phone the first thing I'll do is get online and say "You told me so...", but I'm not worried.

Anyway, even if I weren't talking and d riving I'd still only drive with one hand. I feel 10X more comfortable when I don't have two hands that are fighting for the wheel, so I suppose the only difference is I'd have to drop my cell phone to grab the wheel with two hands instead of just grabbing it straight up.
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Old 06-26-2005, 08:15 PM   #15 (permalink)
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A lot of the people people I've seen that can't drive while talking on a cell phone can't drive even when they're focused completely on the road.

As far as public settings, classrooms or meetings aren't a time to chat with someone sitting beside you, much less miles away.
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Old 06-26-2005, 08:44 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by OFKU0
After reading your post, listening to cell phones don't seem that bad.
I'm just curious, is it my writing style to which you object or is it the content? If the latter, did you have something to contribute to the discussion, or did you just intend to insult me?
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Old 06-26-2005, 09:28 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aberkok
My position on cell phones is, I think, logical and can be understood by answering the following question:

"What did everyone do before the widespread use of cell phones?"

The world wasn't crying out for an end to land-line slavery. I think we were all just fine. Which one of the following problems seem trivial to you?

-cancer
-AIDS
-world hunger
-genocides
-the worldwide rich/poor divide
-lack of affordable widespread portable telecommunication devices
Which one of these problems has a convenient and available solution right now? What did we do before regular phones? What did we do before electricity? What did we do before we had Interstate highways? What did we do before we had refrigeration for food?

We got along fine without stuff that makes life more convenient, but now that we have it, there's no sense in shunning it just because we were able to live without it. What did you do before the Internet? It has similar uses to cell phones: recreation, business, convenient communication and data transfer, and you're not telling us that we can get by just fine without it.

Start with your question, and back up through every technological advance we've made in the last five thousand years. Humans survived without them, but we got a lot farther after we had them. If I'm going to disconnect my cell phone because I got along fine without it, I might as well saddle up a horse and ride down to Amish country, becaus that's where that train of thought leads me.
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Old 06-26-2005, 09:30 PM   #18 (permalink)
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I'll object to your content.....

Honestly, I don't care if I'm in a theater and someone just flips open his phone just to look up something. I paid to see the movie. Not watch this kid mess with his phone. I don't see how a tiny screen on a phone can be more distracting than the huge silver screen and the soundtrack that goes along with it. Now, if it's ringing and ringing and ringing, he answers and yacks away, that's different.

I don't have a problem with cell phones and driving either. Use a headset. Or go totally hands free and get voice recognition installed in your car. I can understand your frustrations regarding meetings, classrooms and other similar situations as phone use would be considered rude.

There are also situations where is is not possible to turn your phone off. For my job, sometimes I am on call and I have to be ready to go to work at a moments notice. That means keeping the phone on. While in a movie for example, it'll be on silent but if won't be off. There's no way I'm going to stay chained to my house waiting for my land line to ring on my on-call days when I can be out doing errands and other activities and carry a cell.

Overall, I can understand your frustrations and I see where you're coming from, but I think that you're just being a little too nit-picky about cell phone use. Realize that it's not possible for everyone to follow your set of rules but at the same time people could be a little more considerate.

Last edited by Hardknock; 06-27-2005 at 04:12 PM..
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Old 06-26-2005, 09:40 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Seige
1) My cell phone is on during class time regardless whether it is lecture, or an exam. Simply because if I deem the phone call important (i'm not talking about "OMG MY BEST FRIEND CALLED I NEED TO ANSWER THE PHONE" as opposed to "my family is calling me, and this never happens at this time of day, therefore there is probably something I need to know") I may need to leave the class or exam to take it. However, my phone is ALWAYS on vibrate during these settings and to see who it is, I take it out of my pocket and view the screen on the outside my phone. If it is important, I walk out, if not, back into the pocket letting it vibrate.
I know of instructors who don't mind their students checking incoming calls and taking them in the hall during lecture. I'm not one of them. The act of taking out you phone and checking the screen to see who is calling is by itself a distraction, perhaps a minor one, but a distraction nonetheless. Getting up to go in the hall to take a call is a big distraction.

The one exception I grant is for those people who are in a situation where an emergency call might be anticipated. Husbands with pregnant wives late in their pregnancies, or medical personnel on call get exemptions solely for that purpose.

I don't know of any who permit the use of a cell phone during an exam. Cell phone cheating is rampant on college campuses. Having your cell phone out during any exam in one of my classes will result in your receiving a 0 on that exam.
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Old 06-26-2005, 09:54 PM   #20 (permalink)
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I agree with the general sentiment that a lot of people don't have good etiquette while using their cell phones. I wouldn't even call it cell phone etiquette... it's just plain etiquette. I find cell-specific rules to be impractical as they are not the most effective way to get rude people to stop being rude and they are also a nuisance for people whose work involves emergencies (the kind where people need to go to the hospital and not "my daughter can't find her pink cardigan"). I don't have any problem with a doctor who is on call wanting to see a movie instead of twiddling her thumbs and then having to get up and leave in the middle of it to take a call. People get up to use the restroom all the time. Standing up is not a major disruption. The problem is the bright screen coming out every 20 seconds because some kid wants to read his text messages, or the lady who doesn't understand that she's supposed to leave the room to take a call.

I treat my cell phone like an old-fashioned land line that just happens to be handy in case of an emergency on the road. I don't chat on the phone unless I'm not doing anything or I'm expecting the call. I don't call people or answer it when I'm driving unless it's because I need directions from a friend, and I pull over to do it. I don't have it on in class or at performances so as not to disrupt the proceedings. There is hardly any emergency that I could prevent or fix by being able to take a call in the middle of a lecture or an exam instead of listening to my messages 45 minutes later when class is out. Phone calls go both ways and I can always call people back if it's really important. I just see calls as my private business and I use the cell in public only when I need to.

The rules are easy: be aware of the people around you and keep your private business private.
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Old 06-26-2005, 10:02 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gilda
I know of instructors who don't mind their students checking incoming calls and taking them in the hall during lecture. I'm not one of them. The act of taking out you phone and checking the screen to see who is calling is by itself a distraction, perhaps a minor one, but a distraction nonetheless. Getting up to go in the hall to take a call is a big distraction.

The one exception I grant is for those people who are in a situation where an emergency call might be anticipated. Husbands with pregnant wives late in their pregnancies, or medical personnel on call get exemptions solely for that purpose.

I don't know of any who permit the use of a cell phone during an exam. Cell phone cheating is rampant on college campuses. Having your cell phone out during any exam in one of my classes will result in your receiving a 0 on that exam.
I can't imagine me sticking my hand in my pocket being a distraction to others, there is no sound, and it takes me about 3 seconds to check. But perhaps some of your students need to open bags and such, that I guess I can understand.

Yes, the exam thing is VERY true. Fortunately, I have only had to check once so far.

There has to be a way to program my phone so that it vibrates in a certain way if a certain number calls. That way, I would honestly know whether or not it was worth it to walk out of an exam. I don't like the idea of cheating either, since I know so many kids who do.
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Old 06-26-2005, 10:26 PM   #22 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hardknock
Honestly, I don't care if I'm in a theater and someone just flips open his phone just to look up something. I paid to see the movie. Not watch this kid mess with his phone.
Exactly my point. I want to watch what's on the screen, not someone in front of me checking text messages.

Quote:
I don't see how a tiny screen on a phone can be more distracting than the huge silver screen and the soundtrack that goes alone with it. Now, if it's ringing and ringing and ringing, he answers and yacks away, that's different.
The sight of the cell phone's screen is just as distracting to many people as the sound of it's ringing or it's owner talking. Movies are both visual and auditory.

Quote:
There are also situations where is is not possible to turn your phone off. For my job, sometimes I am on call and I have to be ready to go to work at a moments notice. That means keeping the phone on. While in a movie for example, it'll be on silent but if won't be off. There's no way I'm going to stay chained to my house waiting for my land line to ring on my on-call days when I can be out doing errands and other activities and carry a cell.
But there really aren't any situations where it's not possible to turn the phone off. The situation you describe leaves you with three choices I can see: Turning it off, leaving it on and foregoing an activity, or leaving it on and potentially disturbing others. Turning it off and risking the loss of your job isn't a good option, which leaves you with not going to the movie on that particular night, or going and potentially disturbing others. If you choose to go to a movie and check your phone in the theater while in the line of sight of other patrons, you're lessening the enjoyment of those you distract because of your choice.

Grace is on call a couple of times a week, and she doesn't stay home, and, like you, carries a phone with her so she can be contacted easily and quickly. Being on call does, however restrict her from doing certain things, like drinking alcohol, or going out of town, even on her days off. If we're going out on one of her on-call days, we go out to dinner, or dancing, or play videogames or miniature golf or go shopping or one of any of a dozen other things that can be done where light and noise are a minimal disruption. lf there's a movie we want to see at the theater, we simply go on a night she's not on call, and do something else, like watch a dvd at home or any of the other things I mentioned.

Quote:
Overall, I can understand your frustrations and I see where you're coming from, but I think that you're just being a little too nit-picky about cell phone use. Realize that it's not possible for everyone to follow your set of rules but at the same time people could be a little more considerate.
But it is possible. Inconvenient in many cases, sure, but that's true of just about everything in life. It's inconvenient for me to have my cell phone off when I'm teaching a class, but I nonetheless leave it off. I check for messages during breaks or lunch, and return important calls then. I don't think I've ever, in my life received a call that was so urgent it couldn't wait until I had time to check messages.
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Old 06-26-2005, 10:48 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Seige
I can't imagine me sticking my hand in my pocket being a distraction to others, there is no sound, and it takes me about 3 seconds to check. But perhaps some of your students need to open bags and such, that I guess I can understand.
If you can get the phone out of your pocket very quietly, check it and return it in about 3 seconds, I'd likely never notice. The disruption comes from the part which requires getting up and leaving class to take the call, which is a major distraction. Now you may be very, very adept at judging the importance of the call based on who is calling, but the person calling may not be quite so adept, and may be calling for a trivial reason. But lets grant that you're quite good at knowing when the call is important enough to disrupt class, and when it isn't. Not everyone is going to be that good at judging which calls are important. And, sadly, many would just plain lie because they want to take calls from friends. How am I to distiguish those who are perceptive about which calls are important, those who think they are, but have poor judgement, and the jerks who just don't care?

You sound like you have a very reasonable approach, and if all students were like this, it wouldn't be a problem. Unfortunately, there too many people who are inconsiderate or who cheat, or who just aren't careful not to be disruptive simply because they don't care. Rules meant to curb their behavior end up catching otherwise reasonable people in the net. [/QUOTE]
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Old 06-26-2005, 11:24 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by MrSelfDestruct
*snip*
Start with your question, and back up through every technological advance we've made in the last five thousand years. Humans survived without them, but we got a lot farther after we had them. If I'm going to disconnect my cell phone because I got along fine without it, I might as well saddle up a horse and ride down to Amish country, becaus that's where that train of thought leads me.
Great words, the whole thing. This part stuck out for me personally.

Been down this conversational road a million, trillion times. More, probably. I've sold cellular phones of every kind since '98, and have to this day. I started with analog and basic digital phones, and sold every new technological advance as they came about.

(following is not in response to anything, it is just an ordered list)
1. Yeah, I can live without my phone. Why would I? Landline phones are more expensive, for one, and I can't use it wherever I am. I enjoy the ability to communicate with people whenever I feel I need to, without having to find and feed a pay phone while I'm away from home.

2. If someone talks on or uses a cell phone in a distracting manner in a theater, they're getting a stern warning, getting yelled at, and then getting my foot in their ass. I find it incredibly rude and disrespectful, hands-down, and will get in the face of anyone who persists in doing so while I'm around. It is flatly inexcusable.

3. There are a million bad drivers. For every person that bitches about the evil cell phones ruining everyone's driving, I have the following to say: It's not the phone, it's the fact that it's a distraction. People demonize the damn things for no reason. Use a speaker or headset so you can better hold the wheel and concentrate if you're a poor driver to start with. For every person I see doing stupid things while on a cell phone, I see the same bad driving because a woman is applying makeup while driving, eating a burger, yelling at their kids, smacking their kids, paying more attention to their kids than the road for some other reason, and many others who just SUCK ASS at driving. I drive a lot, I see a lot, and it's not cell phones, it's any type of distraction.

4. I drive perfectly whether or not i'm making a call on my phone. I find it appalling that there are laws banning the use of the phone in the car. If you're going to make such a law, make it for distractions of a general nature. So NO MAKEUP (I see this constantly, drives me insane), no reading the newspaper (you may laugh, but I see it all the time), etc. People need to be held accountable for their poor driving habits, not because they're poor drivers who are too stupid to realize their already poor driving skills are being compounded by trying to do anything else but concentrate on the road.

5. If you're going to ban cell phones on the road, ban old people first. For every swerve I see here in Florida with a moron talking on their phone, I see 5 old people nearly running people off the road, running lights, going well under the speed limit, changing lanes on a whim without notice or regard for who might already be in the lane at the time... and the list goes on to infinity. If you really want to help make the roads safer, start testing old people with some regularity. As it stands now, you can get a driver's permit that's good for 8 years, and extend the permit out via mail, phone, or internet. So grannie can go legally blind and have palsy and still get behind the wheel, and they will keep reissuing that permit without so much as an eye exam. THAT is a problem.
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Old 06-27-2005, 06:01 AM   #25 (permalink)
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I'll add this to the part about driving while talking: on a recent episode of Mythbusters, it was demonstrated that driving while having a cell phone conversation is actually MORE dangerous than driving with a blood alcohol content of 0.8, the legal limit in most states. The test drivers did worse on the driving tests while having complicated conversations than they did after several beers.

It wasn't the "hands on the wheel, eyes on the road" factor so much as the "concentration on the conversation" factor.
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Old 06-27-2005, 06:21 AM   #26 (permalink)
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It is obvious that of the 3 scenarios described by Gilda, the first two are nice to observe proper manners. The 3rd one, however is critical life and death. I have been behind drivers who are weaving around their lanes, only to find that they are on the cell phone. yesterday, on the Danforth, traffic in both directions was abruptly halted by a self-centred idiot performing a 3 point turn (in heavy traffic) while chatting on his cell. to top it off, his passenger was sitting there doing nothing. She could have taken the call. But noooo, he had to use the phone himself. He performed this monoeuvre (which was illegal in this situation even without a cell phone, because he was obstructing traffic) very slowly and clumsily, using about 5 points to complete it.

As for kids using them in class: confiscate them. There is no need that is suddenly apparant in the past 10 years that requires families to contact students directly (during class or exams) this is what the school office and secretaries with message pads are for. The phone is just a toy or status symbol in this case, and we are building rational to wrongly justify its existence.

My job also required me to be oncall, and when I was scheduled to be on-call, I did not go to movies or bars, where I could be suddenly yanked out of participation. Being on call required a certain responsibility (which i was paid for) that I needed to maintain.

Last edited by Janey; 06-27-2005 at 06:26 AM..
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Old 06-27-2005, 06:31 AM   #27 (permalink)
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I think complaining about people sending or reading text messages in cinemas is going a bit too far. It takes a few seconds, or a few minutes to send a text message, but people don't hold them in the air to read or write them. Every cinema I've been in has that stadium-style seating and I've while I might notice a mobile phone screen every now and then it's never been a distraction at all. Maybe the guy in your cinema just happened to be seated in a bad position so that you could see his screen, but I don't think it's a big deal at all. Plenty of things in daily life are distracting, some are just no big deal. A ringing mobile phone is, of course, but I think etiquette is getting better about that.

As for phones in lectures, if it's on silent/vibrate then it's never bothered me if someone takes a call outside (as long as they don't start talking until they're out). People have to go to the bathroom, come or leave early to lectures, take calls for any number of reasons. As long as they're quiet and discreet about coming and going I don't think it's too big a deal. Kids in middle school shouldn't have phones on in class, but adults in a university lecture deserve more freedom than that.

Strange or annoying ringtones on the street have never bothered me, I like the diversity, it's interesting to see a gangsta-looking guy with an Aqua ringtone or a guy in a suit with the crazy frog one, or a pink, frilly girl with a normal digital tone. Sometimes I roll my eyes when hearing the crazy frog one or chuckle when I hear the theme from Frasier or Yakkety Sax... all just simple things that make every day more interesting

Of course the driving while using a phone without a hands-free kit, or putting on makeup or having a coffee is ridiculous. Most people I know, if they are called while driving they don't answer. If it's important or urgent then I'll call again... 2 missed calls within a few seconds generally means it's important.

I think that should be another rule - if it's just a social call and the person doesn't pick up, just call another time, or they'll call back if they have time. If it's important, call twice so they know to call back as soon as they can.

Edit: sorry, this is so disjointed
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Old 06-27-2005, 07:27 AM   #28 (permalink)
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I don't currently own a cell phone. I've had one in the past, but I've found it more of an annoyance than an asset. I carry a pager for work (always set on vibrate), for anyone else, the world won't come to an end if it takes an extra hour to find me. I'm in total agreement with the first 2 premises that Gilda makes, I'd modify the 3rd to read "Shut up and drive". I drive a motorcycle as my primary transportation during the summer. While motorcycles seem to be invisible to many cars, nearly all of the close calls that I have involve a moron on a cell phone that isn't paying attention.
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Old 06-27-2005, 07:30 AM   #29 (permalink)
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I think this is a strongly age-differentiated argument, simply because of the technological newness of cell phones. For posters AND the general population in my age bracket, cell phones have always existed. Even the year I was born, there were those boxy car phones that couldn't operate outside of the car's battery. As such, they've always been there and always will be cell phones in our lives. I don't think I'll ever need a "landline" insomuch as I can be available no matter where I am for (easier AND cheaper).

Because of their omnipresence, it doesn’t even cross my mind when a cell phone rings or is answered. It, like others have said, is a distraction – but it is a distraction that I tune out, just like barking dogs and children crying. There are perfectly acceptable ways to use a cell phone, including in a car, and I think it would be brash to set that type of “standard” for people. Who decides how much of “a distraction” something is? If you had a song you really liked playing on the stereo, and you were listening intently to the lyrics… would you not have the same mental distraction as a cell phone? I realize it is a slippery slope, but this type of argument would mandate removing stereos from cars as well.

While I was typing this message, a coworker approached me and we were scheduling a meeting at 9:30 regarding documentation on one of our production CDs. In the course of talking, his cell phone rang in his pocket; he pulled it out and answered it. Under the antiquated etiquette of the older generation, this could be “rude.” For me, it meant turning around and continuing my work. One could argue that this was implicitly stating that the caller was more important than me, but this type of prioritizing happens in a work place, and it is not a cell phone specific argument.

As for movies, I think a RINGING phone is indeed inappropriate because it can severely distract from the movie. This is only the case because in silent or low-sound sections of the movie a ringing phone can fully drown out the soundtrack. As for the screen or text-messaging, this type of behavior is entirely appropriate. The average Pearlescent 15% movie screen is 30 FEET by 70 FEET. (<a href=” http://www.spudart.org/blogs/randomthoughts_comments/2827_0_3_0_C/”>source</a>) The average cell phone screen is 2 x 4 INCHES. While I wouldn’t have been “all up in” the old guys’ face, I certainly wouldn’t have appreciated being yelled at (easily a larger distraction) about having my cell phone open. Many cell phones necessitate opening them to view who is calling – and if that bothers someone then that is their problem, not mine.

In a classroom, I again agree that a ringing phone is distracting and inappropriate. A phone pulled from your pocket and viewed should not be a consideration at all. Oftentimes I pull my cell phone out of my pocket to see the time, as I do not wear a watch. This behavior in and of itself should be no more distracting then someone who looks at their wristwatch. I understand that someone answering a cell phone in class is distracting to everyone, but there are many times that it would be important other than a “husband with a pregnant wife..” that I think you may be unfairly excluding. If my “Home” calls, I can be sure that it’s a very critical issue, such as my father having a heart attack – and I’m you telling me I can’t answer the call would be replied with a few choice words.

Finally – driving. I see no problem driving with a cell phone, teenage-confidence or not. A car can be operated safely and effectively with a cell phone, and those who cannot have problems driving in other ways. If I remember correctly from your previous thread, you (Gilda) have a stricter sense of what is safe driving, and I think that may factor into your opinion here – more so then the phone itself.

Quote:
I'll add this to the part about driving while talking: on a recent episode of Mythbusters, it was demonstrated that driving while having a cell phone conversation is actually MORE dangerous than driving with a blood alcohol content of 0.8, the legal limit in most states. The test drivers did worse on the driving tests while having complicated conversations than they did after several beers.
On the converse, my reaction time on a track is .285 seconds. This is well within the norm for safe driving. A drunken driver can approach reaction times of nearly 2.0 seconds, but drivers over 80 often have that same reaction time merely based on their age.
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Old 06-27-2005, 07:31 AM   #30 (permalink)
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I've had a cell phone since 1999 and I've always felt that a cell phone conversation shouldn't go on for more than 2 minutes. To me it's been a way of telling people where I'm going to be when, or where they should be when, because we need to co-ordinate. It's a redundancy. Now I have clients calling my cell phone number, so I've been forced into conversations on the bus etc.

I can only think of a few times where my cell phone was actually 'needed'. I guess I can do without. I just don't like to. It's a redundancy.

If I'm at the theatre, the phone is off. If it's important, they can leave a message. If I'm at school, I just don't get a signal. Some of my classmates do, and it's always "OMG MY BEST FRIEND CALLED I NEED TO ANSWER THE PHONE" or "OMG ITS MY BOYFRIEND AND HE JUST GOT OUT OF CLASS".

THAT drives me NUTS

I can't stand watching people use cell phones as regular phones. Like, when you're in a social situation and someone decides they'll talk to someone that isn't right there instead.
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Old 06-27-2005, 08:12 AM   #31 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rlyss
As for phones in lectures, if it's on silent/vibrate then it's never bothered me if someone takes a call outside (as long as they don't start talking until they're out). People have to go to the bathroom, come or leave early to lectures, take calls for any number of reasons. As long as they're quiet and discreet about coming and going I don't think it's too big a deal. Kids in middle school shouldn't have phones on in class, but adults in a university lecture deserve more freedom than that.
Exactly. A lot of us are adults with adult concerns--children, spouses, etc--that add up for emergencies. I keep my phone on me at all times and on vibrate regardless of where I am because it has proved useful in the past during family emergencies. And as Rlyss said, in a college lecture, it's just one of many things that can distract. I know during a long lecture (especially those summer term) I get up to go get a drink or stretch if the professor hasn't given us a break in a while. Besides, I've had profs who keep their cell phones handy for the same reasons I do. However, if you're text messaging someone in class and it's not a 300-person lecture in the auditorium...that's ridiculous.

As for the movie theater--when stuff like that happens repeatedly, that's when I go get an usher. Usually I preface it by saying this, "Someone is talking on their cell phone so much I can't enjoy the movie. I'd like my money back." Usually they'll deal with the culprit rather than giving you your money back. Yeah, it requires you to get out of your seat but it takes about as much time as going to the bathroom, and the person at fault feels completely chagrined because some teenage usher had to ask them to correct their behavior. There's a REASON why they say to turn off your cell phones and be quiet, people. Sometimes I think people fail to realize they're not alone in the world.

My biggest pet peeve, as someone who has worked in service industries, is when people approach a person they have to interact with in order to order something while still on their cell phone. You'd be amazed how many people try to conduct a conversation while also trying to conduct business with the deli counterperson, cashier, bartender, etc. It's incredibly annoying to have to figure out who the hell the person is talking to. It's even more confusing and annoying when they're using a handsfree unit. Ugh. If, for some reason, I must do the above (for instance, when I tell my mother goodbye she has about three more things of "absolute importance" she must say to me) I apologize to the person. This has only happened once.

I think the other problem here is that people feel that talking on their cell phone is their "right." I'm sorry but I don't believe you have a right to be rude without an excellent reason. The other problem here is that people have a hard time self-policing their behavior, and cell phone usage is one of those behaviors that requires practicing self-control of a sort. It requires you to be aware of others, your surroundings, and to be aware of what is polite and what is rude. Some people just don't want to exert that kind of effort. To me that means you shouldn't have a cell phone to begin with
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Old 06-27-2005, 08:16 AM   #32 (permalink)
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Phones off in class, phones off in cinemas, phone on silent where possible, no phones while driving.
No damned crazy frog ringtone, if i hear the ringtone from your phone, i will personally delete the tone, reset your phone to factory settings and smack you in the face for making me take time out of my day to do that.
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Old 06-27-2005, 08:19 AM   #33 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rlyss
I think complaining about people sending or reading text messages in cinemas is going a bit too far. It takes a few seconds, or a few minutes to send a text message, but people don't hold them in the air to read or write them
Yes, yes they do. And in stadium seating, it really doesn't matter what at what angle they are sitting in relation to you... you can pretty much see a bright blue screen from any seat behind the offending person. That's probably what happened in the situation Gilda described, and it happens all the time when I go to the movies here in NYC. I don't care if somebody wants to read a text message instead of getting their $10.25's worth of the movie. They just need to turn to the side and shield the light so that it reflects only into their seat and at their face. It's not hard to do.
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Old 06-27-2005, 08:49 AM   #34 (permalink)
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ha ha, SC, your avi is teh funnay!

anway, enough noobness...

I hate my cell phone, largely because I married Martel. Martel is the most anti-phone guy I know- his cell phone is hardly ever even on, unless we are not together. So I've adopted his attitude and am pretty much laissez-faire about the whole thing.

I'll add one more rule to the list: NO "JAMMING" WITH YOUR FRIENDS TO YOUR STUPID RINGTONES!!! When I worked at the hospital, there were these three girls who worked in the cafeteria who would sit around, play their stupid little MIDI Rap-song ringtones, and booty dance. In front of all the families with loved ones hooked up to life support.

*sighz* (/sarcasm)
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Old 06-27-2005, 09:22 AM   #35 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Supple Cow
Yes, yes they do. And in stadium seating, it really doesn't matter what at what angle they are sitting in relation to you... you can pretty much see a bright blue screen from any seat behind the offending person. That's probably what happened in the situation Gilda described, and it happens all the time when I go to the movies here in NYC. I don't care if somebody wants to read a text message instead of getting their $10.25's worth of the movie. They just need to turn to the side and shield the light so that it reflects only into their seat and at their face. It's not hard to do.
Note to Jinnkai, a very very nicely put together series of arguments. I have to agree with you that there is a generational aspect to the entire situation. And I agree that I can accept cell phone 'noise' similarly to the background noise of barking dogs, traffic, lawnmowers etc.

But where I diverge from your well stated perpective is the embracing of a new technology to excuse the same old bad manners. As Supple Cow states, yes, especially in stadium seating the bright pinpoint of light of a cell pone easily irritates even though average Pearlescent 15% movie screen is 30 FEET by 70 FEET. It's almost like haveing a laser pointed into your eyes. And yes, I have complained and asked for my money back in these situations.

i work in an IT environment, where desk meetings can get interrupted by pagers, cells, IMs, deskphones. In all cases if I get one of these, I ask permission from the "real live" human that I am meeting with if I can answer.

If I get displaced by a phone call, I leave, or if I am at store, and my service is interrupted, I interrupt back, either waving the attention of the clerk back to me, or appealing to the manager. Once a waiter answered his cell while dealing with my table. He lost his tip.

no excuse for bad manners, and we don't have to take it.

Last edited by Janey; 06-27-2005 at 09:24 AM..
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Old 06-27-2005, 09:42 AM   #36 (permalink)
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I'm so fucking sick of people bitching about mobile phones. Mr Self Destruct and Analog said it best here.

1. Teachers need to realize that the class they are teaching is not the most important thing in the student's lives. They paid for the class and can come and go as they please. If someone wants to answer the phone in class, fine, just say 'hold on a sec' and immediately go outside.

2. The old guy was being an ass. The kid wasn't making a call or anything. He just looked at his phone. Maybe he wanted to see what time it was. If a fucking 1"x1" screen distracts you from a giant fucking movie screen I don't want to know what you'll do if someone gets up to piss. God forbid someone next to you eats popcorn or slurps their drink!

3. This lady did the right thing. She got up and went to the tunnel. Ifthe sound of someone talking quietly at 40 feet away is more distracting than a 10,000 watt super sound system, stay home.

I call bullshit on the mythbusters thing. They did everything possible to make the drivers fail both tests. Time trials? Parallel parking (with a very small space)? Asking crazy questions? Accident avoidance that requires a split second lane change (without time to check the blind spot, of course)? Whatever. Most driving is simply going down a straight road at less than 50 mph. I can count on one hand the amount of times that I've had to change lanes like that.
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Old 06-27-2005, 10:39 AM   #37 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kutulu
I'm so fucking sick of people bitching about mobile phones. Mr Self Destruct and Analog said it best here.

1. Teachers need to realize that the class they are teaching is not the most important thing in the student's lives. They paid for the class and can come and go as they please. If someone wants to answer the phone in class, fine, just say 'hold on a sec' and immediately go outside.

2. The old guy was being an ass. The kid wasn't making a call or anything. He just looked at his phone. Maybe he wanted to see what time it was. If a fucking 1"x1" screen distracts you from a giant fucking movie screen I don't want to know what you'll do if someone gets up to piss. God forbid someone next to you eats popcorn or slurps their drink!

3. This lady did the right thing. She got up and went to the tunnel. Ifthe sound of someone talking quietly at 40 feet away is more distracting than a 10,000 watt super sound system, stay home.

I call bullshit on the mythbusters thing. They did everything possible to make the drivers fail both tests. Time trials? Parallel parking (with a very small space)? Asking crazy questions? Accident avoidance that requires a split second lane change (without time to check the blind spot, of course)? Whatever. Most driving is simply going down a straight road at less than 50 mph. I can count on one hand the amount of times that I've had to change lanes like that.
1. uhuh. couldn't disagree more. May apply to lectures, for adults who have paid for their classes, in which case they should excercise proper manners. But it certainly does not apply to classes with teachers with kids, who, by the way have not paid for their classes.

2. you may have a point. but the tiny bright pin point of light was discussed earlier. drinking, going to the washroom is expected behaviour. there's a reason why ushers have flashlights with dimming red cones on them. Bright pin points of light in a darkened theatre is extremely irritating. the industry already knows this. Again, If he is checking the time, just figure that a movie lasts 2 hrs, that's where you decided to spend your time when you paid your ticket. Again manners is what is being discussed here (etiquette) why not observe them?

3. yes she did observe proper behaviour. yet it was still distracting (obviously) for those that were closest. Why not just step out into the lobby as that's what they are for? She started well, but fell short of observing appropriate ettiquette.


You know, manners are timeless. It demonstrates forebearance, good culture and observing that it isnt all about you. there is no excuse for boorish behaviour.
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Old 06-27-2005, 10:59 AM   #38 (permalink)
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Looks like state legislators are doing something about this:

States Bar Teen Drivers Using Cell Phones

Quote:
The year began with just two states limiting cell phone use for teen drivers. But as legislative sessions moved ahead, lawmakers in six states passed bills to bar all cell phones, handheld or handsfree, for teenage drivers with learner permits or provisional licenses.

Now, laws in Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, Maryland and Tennessee say young drivers must keep the phone off. Illinois's measure is waiting for Gov. Rod Blagojevich to sign it into law, but his staff says he intends to. Maine already bars cell phones for drivers with provisional licenses up to age 21, and New Jersey bans them for those drivers at any age.

At least a dozen more states considered similar measures in recent months and balked, though advocates say they'll be back.

Lawmakers don't necessarily expect teenagers to like it and they don't.

"I don't know anybody who says it's a good idea, or it's fair to single out 16- or 17-year-olds," said Adam Bonefeste, a 17-year-old from Springfield, Ill. Nearly all his friends have their own cell phone, and everybody needs to drive for work, school and social life, he said.

"I drive and talk on my cell phone all the time," he said. "I've never had any problems, never run into anything or got a ticket."
Whether or not they're using cell phones, teenagers are much more likely than older drivers to get into accidents. At age 16, boys get into 27 crashes per million miles driven and girls 28 crashes. Those numbers drop quickly as drivers age. By the time drivers reach the 20-to-24-year-old group, there are eight crashes per million miles for men, and nine crashes for women, according to the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety, based on 2001 data.

Those crashes take a deadly toll. The insurance institute says that 32 16-year-olds died per 100,000 drivers in 2003, four times the fatality rate of the 30-to-59 age group.
Researchers say there is clearly a problem with teenage drivers becoming easily distracted on the road. Their work has bolstered efforts to ease teenagers into the driving world, giving them more time to learn, restricting nighttime driving and barring other teenage passengers, who sometimes incite dangerous behavior. Now 45 states have some version of what's called graduated drivers licenses.

But many researchers say convincing evidence is lacking on any link between cell phone use and accidents even with academic studies like one published last winter that found young motorists talking on cell phones react as slowly as senior citizens, and are more impaired than drunk drivers.
Looks like a good start to me, though I'd ban them in cars completely.
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Old 06-27-2005, 11:57 AM   #39 (permalink)
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But many researchers say convincing evidence is lacking on any link between cell phone use and accidents
Ban radios, children, horns, sandals, makeup, and sunglasses from cars too. Because obviously those hamper our safe driving skills too.

It's a slippery slope.

It's about drivers education and awareness, not whats in the car.
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Old 06-27-2005, 12:19 PM   #40 (permalink)
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Location: Toronto
it's about driver's concentration. Holding a conversation with somebody on a phone is more difficult sans body language than with a passenger. It also consumes more of the driver's attention than a pair a of sunglasses on your face or sandals on your feet. Listening to the radio is passive. They've been in cars for decades without any real controversy.

There's no real slippery slope. Cell phone use in a car is prolonged distraction. I say common sense should prevail, not paranoia.
Janey is offline  
 

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cell, etiquette, phone, rules, usage


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