RhetoricSarcasm

hey how does child support work? ... I heard that if you are a guy you can sign rights saying that you dont want anytihng to do with the child and that you wont have to pay anything. ...seems kind of selfing but is this true ? any info would be appreciated.

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Met22

Different from state to state.
If they are your kids they are your responsibility. There is is a legal program called DISSO master that figures out what you pay based on income, what percentage you have the kids and assets and mothly debts.

You can make deals with the other parent in regard to no access to the kids, but support is one that is extremely difficult to slip.

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Cynthetiq

there isn't ANY state that I can think of where you can dodge support of a child.

You put your dick in, you have burden to bear of the consequences. Period.

I'm not interested in having to foot the bill because you don't want to have to do anything with the child. Someone has to pay for it and it should shouldn't be me.

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ARTelevision

No. You can't walk away from your legal responsibility.
What you heard was totally incorrect.

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bender

What you don't have is any right to say how the money is spent once you hand it over, but you still have to hand it over.

sixate

Just know this.... The man always gets fucked in the ass over shit like this. Yet another reason why I'll never have a kid.

I know dudes who are almost 40 and are reduced to living in their parents basements because their fat lazy wives got tired of their man working 12 hours a day every day of the week. The dumb broads always say the man isn't involved enough with the family. Well, how the fuck can he when he has to fill 5 fucking stomachs, and the bitch doesn't work?! So they get divorced, and the man has to give over half of his check, pay a mortgage to a home he can't even step foot in, and pay for a car that he can't fucking drive!! Then the worst part, the broad hooks up with another dude. She still doesn't work, and now he's paying for another man to raise his family. I would kill before I let that happen to me.... Actually, no I wouldn't. I'm just smart enough to keep myself out of situations like that.

nirol

Tell us how you really feel, SIXATE.

There is not a legal basis for not being liable for child support simply because you voluntarily forfeit your visitation and other legal rights.

Another fun item is that if your wife gets pregnant by someone else while legally married to you, you are financially responsible for that child too. It makes not difference what the DNA test says. This makes for a little bit of resentment among guys.

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dragon2fire

could not have put it better my self

analog

^^Yeah, every word of it.

Thanks for tapping into my brain for me, i didn't feel like typing that all out. lol

viejo gringo

I payed for 12 years...but it was worth it ---those were my kids, and I even gave more when I could......

and if you don't pay, don't ever expect to get to get an income tax return check.....the courts get theirs first...as it should be--

redravin40

I gladly pay my child support even though there were times when I ate Raman for months on end because of it.
She left me but I don't intend for my kids to suffer because of choices made by their parents.
Walking away is never an option.
There are too many deadbeat dads out there.
I know too many woman who are the soul support of their children.
The men have walked away and unless the woman go on welfare the state is not going to make much effort to track the man down.

rock_bottom

In the state's I'm familiar with, any method of getting out of child support is invariably illegal. You have to get paid under the table, which isn't an option anyway for most jobs you'd want to work. Child support automatically pre-empts any other garnishment you have, even a tax garn.
As for it's validity, it's one of those things that really makes in some situations (the deadbeat dad who leaves his uneducated wife with three kids, and without child support they'd be on the streets) but is really crappy in a lot of other ones (golddigger wife leaves for greener pastures, hubby's working fifty hour weeks for the next two decades to basically get minimum wage). I know people on both ends of the spectrum.

Fearless_Hyena

EXACTLY!!! I'm with ya here too man, couldn't have said it better myself!!

Reese

Yah, There's no way to get out of child support. I thiink it may be possible if both parents agree to it. Still I doubt that would happen.

I have friends paying child support and I feel so sorry for them. They get to see their kids like once a month. They're paying out their asses and most of the money doesn't even go to the kids. That's what pisses me off. I hope that If I'm ever in that situation that my ex would at least be a good enough person to use the money for the kid, not for her enjoyment.

/End rambling...

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JimmyDumbshit

bullshit. you can sign away your rights but the mother must agree to it, or possibly even suggest it. I've seen it done twice when the fathers were such losers the mother wanted to be rid of them completely.

Minx

This is absolute bulls*** (sorry sixate). The man doesn't always get screwed. Believe it or not there are women out there (ahem...like myself) who don't take a single dime from the ex. He is an active part of their life and that is the only damn thing that really matters. What is important is what is best for the kids. People tend to forget that amongst their anger and greed and need to lash out during a seperation. I am fully able to raise my children by myself so I don't feel the need to take money from him just because I have the "right" too.
As far as the original idea of this post......if you are adult enough to get a girl pregnant then you had better be adult enough to at least want to have a part of their lives.
Actions - consequences. Seems pretty simple.

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ARTelevision

I've noted your elegant response, JimmyDumbshit. Your sense of decorum here is surpassed only by the name you have chosen for yourself.

Of course, the other parent and you can make any agreement you can work toward. I was talking about legal responsibility, wasn't I?

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Kaos

Sorry Minx, but if the man tries to do the right thing by going to court and doing everything he is supposed to do in the case of a divorse, he WILL always get fucked.

Only way the guy doesn't end up paying is if the relationship ended amicably, or the guy moves to another state and becomes a deadbeat dad.

redravin40

While it is possible for the mother to agree to not accept any money if she has to go on welfare because of it, the state will hunt you down.
They don't like having to pay for things you should be even if the mother was too scared to make you pay.

sidenote: right on art.

oberon

OK, I think sixate's point was that if a woman should be as responsible for the baby as the man. But I suppose there's probably some dispute about what all "responsbility" means... financial isn't the only part of it. But people need to be reasonable about this. Unfortunately, most of the time (it seems) the court has to settle this issue between partners.

I'm with redravin and Art. You need a new nickname, JimmyDumbshit. Or not?

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GakFace

btw.. I do think that sixate's reasons aren't really good, in my opinion, as to why he's not having kids.. as it doesn't always happen that way. Just keep you dick under control until you're in a good relationship and all of this can hopefully be avoided.

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torn lace

*ahem* my biological father walked out on my mom when he found out she was pregnant with me. he was a really fucking immature 28 year old dirtbag who was into drugs. she chose to keep me, and when i was young, they had joint custody, although he thought he could flee to the next state in order to escape paying childsupport (doesn't work!). my mom struggled to earn a living working at a primary school ana d pizzaria, while earning a degree in nursing at a nearby college. so he was a real asshole to me, always saying he would come take me out, but he would never show up. i can distinctly remember waiting outside on my front porch (my mom and I lived with her mom), just waiting for what seemed like hours for him to arrive, and he never did. it really took a toll on me as a child. i always felt worthless, and it still affects me to this day when it comes to men, i'm always terrified that i'll be rejected during a relationship, etc. Eventually it got to the point where i decided i didn't want to see him at all. it just hurt too much. throughout my life we did receive childsupport, and i can attest to the fact that however small, every little bit helps in raising a child. even in respect to little things, like having the extras (like oreos and new sneakers) that all the other kids could have without a problem. sometimes you have to have what is best for the child in mind, and not your selfish interests. it was best for me not to have contact with my father, though his check was greatly appreciated while growing up. you always have a responsibility to the life that you helped to create. after 13 years i have just met him again and his family, and we're developing some sort of relationship. i'm in college, i'm adjusted, and it's the right time now.

so don't fucking be an asshole to the children that you had a part in creating. don't blame anyone, and don't try to get out of it. it's no one's fault, and it's especially NOT THE CHILD'S FAULT. so do what you can to make their life happy and healthy.

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nirol

Hi Torn Lace.
I grew up the same way, their were 5 of us and it was a struggle. I carried a lot of resentment towards my father and it took me long time to get over it. You are right the primary responsibility of all invovled is the child's welfare, ALWAYS.
I hope you dont let your child hood experiences retard any relationships you have as an adult, but I know that is difficult.
Not all men are pigs, just most of us.

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guthmund

My sister's ex is a deadbeat. He was pissed off because my sister left him for a woman and everything turned into a hassle. She had problems getting divorced from the guy because he fought over every stupid fucking little thing.

Now that they're divorced he supposed to be paying child support through the courts. He drops off or mails a check that gets there by a specific date every month and then the courts mail it to my sister.

He's about $1000 behind right now. If he doesn't give her at least 25% of the total amount her lawyer is going to have him arrested Monday and then he's going to file papers to have his wages garnished until the debt is paid.

Now that I've answered the original question to the best of my abilitities....

If you're stupid enough to stick your dick in the kind of woman who's going to do the things you guys mentioned in this thread then you should suffer your stupidity. You are a complicit party when it comes to having kids. Unless she has some way of obtaining your sperm without your knowledge and/or consent And since you're a willing partner you should be just as responsible. I realize that situations change and people can be really vindictive, but I see example after example of vindictive women squeezing child support and alimony for all it's worth and I think to myself "They were vindictive bitches before you married them...how did you think this was going to turn out?"

My mother and father were divorced when I was 10 and although there was a lot of animosity, they were both grown up enough (well, mostly) to put their kids needs ahead of scoring points against each other.

whew...I gotta take a nap...

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sixate

I wish all women were like you because the other 98% are money hungry bitches that'll destroy a man's will to want to be a part of the child's life.

I don't have a problem with child support. I do have a problem when the man has to pay a mortgage, pay for a car, and still have alimony on top of the child support. How the hell is a man supposed to live? There's a simple answer... He doesn't. Why the fuck does the man have to pay so fucking much all the time when the woman doesn't work, but has the ability to do so?

There's one guy I work with who has 7 kids. He got divorced this year, and after all the money is taken out of his check each week he doesn't even bring home enough money in a month to pay my fucking car payment. That's fucking bullshit! His ex is a lazy fucking slut who cheated on him! The whore doesn't work. Never has and never will. I can rattle off at least another 15 dudes that I work with who get fucked like this. I find it funny that in situations like this women just can't seem to understand why a guy could care less. Why would he care when his life is ruined. It takes two to work through it. People shouldn't try to fuck over the other person as much as possible just because they no longer care for each other. As far as I'm concerned, in situations like I stated above it's just as much the women's fault as it is the man's that the guy could care less.