User Name

I always floss and brush my teeth in the shower, but that's pretty lame compared to everyone else's responses.

bigC

i'm definitely too lazy not to masturbate

majik_6

Hmm, my first year at college was a mix of really really hard work and incredible laziness.

Serious lazy: Did no exercie for most of high school, and wouldn't actually do anything to keep in shape, gained over a hundred pounds.

Good Lazy: Hit college at 300 pounds, but was too lazy/shy to go to the dining hall, and lost 30 pounds in one quarter. Wouldn't eat until I was very tired/weak,and would then find something that could be heated in a microwave in less than 30 seconds (the microwave was broken...didn't get it fixed for 2 quarters).

Most of my laziness is poorly planned, though. It usually makes me work harder in the long run. Example: too lazy to pay for a parking space at college (might have to walk as well!) so I parked in 30 minute parking all day, watching for the parking services to come by, then timing the half hour on my watch, going down, circling the dorm, then pulling into the other 30 min. space.

Now I've used the 30 pounds I lost from total laziness (well about 35, since I got slightly less lazy the last 2 quarters, and ate at least once or twice a day) as a head start to get into a rigorous diet and exercise program.

PS (just remembered this) at college I had a 9x10 single dorm room and wouldn't take the trash all the way to the dumpster (had an elevator even!) until I had over a dozen pizza boxes and 4 or 5 bags of trash in the corner. That may have been one of the laziest things I've ever done.

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MacGnG

i woke up and had missed lunch in the cafeteria, so i went back to sleep, and missed dinner. i was too hung over to move besides struggleing to goto pee but i had a good time the night b4

domokong

i had to type in a couple of windows and instead of taking my hand off the keyboard to use the mouse, i just used my keyboard with ALT+TAB the whole time.

or...

i was sitting down with my hands on my lap or table while watching a movie or something on my computer and someone instant messaged me. i was so lazy that i only bothered to pick up one hand to respond with a "k"

Stewie

I`ve done that, but I was sober.

warrrreagl

Playing third base one afternoon, a slow grounder was hit right to me. Rather than bend over and field it with my glove, I stuck my left foot out sideways and tried to stop it with my foot. Of course, it bounced right over my foot.

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Living is easy with eyes closed.

JumpinJesus

I've never done anything lazy. I'm hyperactive.


Actually, that's a lie.

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Cynthetiq

eh...

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Kush

Once i was at a party, and i got extremely drunk. I woke up with my head on some guys lap, and he had a boner. I couldn't be bothered moving, so i just fell back to sleep.

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I like this forum. A lot.

bigC

i thought this was a thread about the laziest thing you've done, not the gayest.

TerresqueÜ

I don't think I'll win for this, but I peed in my closet, five feet from my bed, instead of going to the bathroom, 10 feet from my bed.


I guess I'm lazy.

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Stewie

Well I peed in my bed.

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Well if ya ain`t the grandaddy of all liars

Drider_it

well i .. never mind to lazy

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micah67

Productive lazy:

As a kid, I setup string and eye-hooks so that I could turn off and on the light switch from my bed.

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~micah

bermuDa

I rearranged my room so I could watch the tv without having to turn around. it was more work in the short term, but my neck is thanking me in the long run

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I am the very model of a moderator gentleman.

XenuHubbard

I'm not too bad, but my friend Wil is the laziest person ever.
I got pissed off at him for not parking the car when we found a space at university. He told me it wasn't close enough to our building. He claims that driving for 30 extra minutes to find a parking space is okay, if it saves you a 5-minute walk. I gave up. He's done this several times.

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"What doesn't kill you, makes you bitter and paranoid". - SB2000

Regziever

Well.. The laziest thing i have ever done was when my sister and her boyfriend where humpin away in her room that is just bellow mine. I was trying to get some sleep but her moaning and his grunting was disturbing me... so i picked up my cellphone (witch i also use as a wakeup timer) and called her cell and told her to keep it down...

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Life is shit,
Death is even worse,
So what's the point of killing yourself?
/Ignatius Camryn Paladine

Loup

I took the escalator.

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fallen_angel

I had a bunk bed when i was younger and the tv was at the foot of it so id watch movies at night when the movie was over the screen would go blue and youd have to turn it off. the remote fell between the wall and the bed and i didnt want to reach down and find it so i grabbed a towel from the floor and covered the spot where the light would be by hanging it from the top bunch so i could sleep.

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rockzilla

I've been meaning to do that for months, but I've been too lazy to go the computer store in the mall that I cut through daily on my way to and from work. I'm too lazy to enhance my Laziness Quotient.....


That's so lazy it defies reason.

mvassek

Used the on screen keyboard with my wireless mouse on my leg to type stuff so I wouldn't have to slide the keyoard out or sit up in my chair.

funk

absolutely nothing!!! thats fukin lazy

MaGlC_MaN

ive done that at my cousins house, we never found a way to lazily turn the lights back on though..

stuckshut

This was from my second year in college, and actually was posted on the college forums. Part of it was posted by my roommate and I updated it later. This is multiple posts combined and edited to make sense...


I went to bed at 5am after reading a book (leisure reading, not for a class) for hours. I woke up at 9, turned my alarm off, slept through my 10 and 11 classes, woke up again at 3pm. As soon as I woke up I picked up my book, same one, I've been reading it since, read right through dinner and 5pm class... still haven't left the bed. Oh, I skipped my tutoring session as well, I'm not leaving my bed today.

After my 5pm class(which I didn't attend) I continued to lie in bed, and eat the occasional Pepperoni Roll. Which, thank goodness, were within reaching distance from my bed. I continued reading for a few hours until about 8pm, when [roommate] and his girlfriend decided to watch a movie. I was the closest person to the VCR, so naturally I was supposed to push the video in. Being the lazy ass that I am, I figured my feet were closer than my hands so they should do the work. I deftly pushed the video in and started the movie. Emboldened by the success of this maneuver I decided that I could probably open the fridge and get myself a Mt. Dew with my feet too. Unfortunately [roommate] had failed to mention the half full Dew he had left there. Which I inevitably spilled all over the floor. Less than 2 minutes later I had cleaned that up and was back in my bed. Where I stayed (for the most part) until midnight. All told, it was a wonderful day

During the past 24 hours I've spent less than 15 minutes out of my bed. And, I will most likely be there until noon tomorrow.

[roommate posted this]:
StuckShut update, he just said (at 1:45 pm) "ah, I think it's time to get dressed for the first time in two days, maybe that'll make some of the stink go away."

All told, I was in bed for around 52 hours straight. It was truly a wonderful experience.

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hotzot

pooped next to a port-o-potty.

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hobo

I've had days where i slept 14 hours and sat the other 10 (not doing anything productive). that count as lazy?

Da-Gimp

almost every night I lie on my bed out cold for hours......fucking lazy bastard I am

mrap1

I peed in an empty soda bottle next to my bed because I was too lazy to go to the bathroom. The thing is that the bottle was starting to fill up and I still had to pee, so I had to get up and go to the bathroom anyway.

KeyserSoze

I was hungry and did not feel like walking the 1/2 block to McDonalds, so I drove.

On another occasion I was to lazy to walk the 5 feet to the bathroom so I opened the sliding door and pissed on my neighbors car

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djflish

When i was at uni i couldn't be bothered to get out of bed to change the tv channel, so i used half a pool cue to jab the buttons with.
i didnt always get the right button but it was better than getting out of bed!

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I know which one I prefer.

Same Guy

not reply to a good post

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Thank you, come again.

Sion

what you call laziness, I call extreme energy efficiency

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He's the best, of course, of all the worst.
Some wrong been done, he done it first. -fz

I jus' want ta thank you...falettinme...be mice elf...agin...

tenchi069

i set up two different lines leading from my bed to my bedroom door so i could open it for someone without getting up, and close it behind them.

ccvirginia

I have a little 17 Inch tv in the basement with no remote. So I use a yard stick to switch channels.

Funny thing is I have a new 55 inch HDTV upstairs in our media room but we don't smoke upstairs so there I sit in the basement with my smokes, cold beer, and yard stick.

Trilidon

Oatmeal container( plain 100% rolled oats)
Spoon
Cup of water

Use spoon to mix water and oatmeal in mouth because your to lazy to get up and use the microwave, because you just caused enough friction to start a fire in a super wank that left you drained and dehydrated.

aedenji

laziest thing I have ever done??? Exactly what I am doing right now

Maveric

i gotta have one of those! where can you get them...? can you get me one?

snoop

I'll get back to you when I finally do something . . . was gonna do something yesterday but hey I was too friggin lazy . .

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j alfred

this one isn't mine, but i was a victim of someone else's laziness:

my friend and i were sitting on the couch, watching television and smoking (cigarettes) with the ashtray on the coffee table not two feet away. my friend asked me to hand him the ash tray, all the while keeping his hand resting on the couch at his side. he coaxed me along until i had the ashtray directly under his burning cigarette. he flicked it with the smallest motion of his thumb, said thanks, and turned back to the television. i could not believe it.

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