KungFuGuy

I made this as a spec commercial for the heinz ketchup contest (topthistv.com). I've been meaning to do a spec commercial for a while now, and the contest provided a good reason to do so.

here it is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZ7ZKvyJXJY

some fun facts:
-she's two years old, and its her first acting experience
-that's her real grandpa, another non-actor
-i had 2 hours to shoot it! I thought I had 6 going in, but her attention span wasn't there, (i should have thought of this goin in!)
-the whole thing cost about $200.00 to make
-probably about 40 hours of labor for the whole process, start to finish. Mixing the music track took about 3-4 hours by itself, and that's not including the sound design.

So let me know your thoughts, thanks for your time and i'm happy to share it with you.

analog

I really like it. It's straight-forward, simple, and hits a lot of major demographics just by featuring a child and a grandparent.

Technical notes:

Good use of angles- there aren't too many (a common problem), and you didn't attempt anything crazy just to be "unique". The angles are complimentary to the set and the poses of the characters, and change smoothly to highlight actions.

The birds' singing is too loud. I like it at the very beginning, but I feel like it'd better serve the atmosphere if the birds faded out (and stayed gone) as the music fades in at 0:04 - 0:05. If they're kept in, they should at least be dialed down, they're too loud for ambiance.

Great job with the lighting- it's bright and evenly lit without being blown out or cave-like.

Nisses

Nice work KungFu guy. Simple, clean, actually brought a smile to my face too.

You managed to transport that cosy, real home feeling into the commercial.

Can't give you any technical notes like Analog, since I'm no technical guy Can't comment on the sound either, no speakers at work.

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squeeeb

wow, that looked like a real no kidding regular tv commercial...looked professional to me...

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KungFuGuy

thanks for the comments guys.

After watching it a couple times, the birds did get annoying. Point taken. It's like that sort of thing where you think you thought of everything and go back and smack yourself in the forehead with a D'oh! On the last day before deadline i completely wrapped myself up in the getting the music done acceptably. I took an existing loop from garageband that was 00:58, and cut the beginning and the end together, to produce a 26 second bit. The birds didn't even cross my mind at that point.

Willravel

Now not only do I miss my grandpa, but I want a hamburger.

TotalMILF

I liked it a lot. You got the point across (choose Heinz!) while giving the viewer a nostalgic feeling. That's a powerful association.

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Hyacinthe

I have to admit I was waiting for it to all pour out of the bottle and all over the table

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shakran

Critique. I promise I'll be nicer to you than I am to my interns

Good storytelling. I'm a big fan of stories that have no narration. Your story had a clear beginning, middle, and end. This is something that shooters that have been in news for years often have trouble with.

I'm pleased to see you using sequences. This again is something many photographers have problems with, but you've got the idea. That's great.

Some stuff needs work though. First off, you need a tripod. Nothing will distract from your story faster than shaky video.

You have issues with screen direction. Look at your first 2 shots. The plate should slide in from the right in the second shot because it was moving right to left in the first shot. Breaking screen direction can be confusing.

You need a hairlight. Your subjects aren't separated from the background enough. Get a light above and behind them, shining down on them - -it'll create a slight outline of light that will pop them out from the backdrop.

Watch some of your shots. There's a medium shot close to the end of the girl in grandpa's lap pouring ketchup. The top half of her face is cut off, and so is the bottom (well .. top since it's upside down ) half of the bottle - -in other words, we don't have anything to look at.

Build up the ketchup-won't-come-out a little more. Get a tight shot up the bottle neck with the ketchup stubbornly refusing to come out. Have the girl frown or look slightly upset that the ketchup won't come out (tight shot of her sad face). That way Grandpa is making everything better.

Give us a shot at the end of the girl's joyful face as she hugs grandpa.

Watch your jumpcuts. Your action isn't matching from shot to shot.

The music is good, and it's timed perfectly with the big swell coming as the ketchup comes out.



That's the short version of the critique. I just spent an hour today critiquing 10 shots an intern did, so don't feel bad that I had so much to say about what could have been done. I think your work is good and shows real promise. I wasn't kidding when I said you've already gotten down concepts that many pros still don't get.

The biggest problem I had with it was the lack of steady video - -the rest was pretty minor stuff. Get the tripod and the vid quality will go up 300%.

KungFuGuy

The grandpa part makes that the best compliment i've received so far.

Shakran- What do you do that you have interns working for you? I'm always eager to talk to other industry people. I learned a lot about commercials from interning at believe media, a commercial production company down in NYC

I graduated from NYU film school last year and am still editing my thesis.

Feel free to blast away with harsh critiques, after hearing some rather novel (and sometimes inane) shots at my work from other film students my skin's gotten tough to that sort of thing.

I would argue for the handheld camera though (okay i didn't do it magnificently and i know specifically of two shots that are too shaky). I say so in general just because today's viewing audience is more accustomed to jump shots & shaky camera work.

The original cut was 1:00 long, and had lots more ketchup buildup like you mentioned, and i cut and cut to keep that portion longer in the :30 cut, but it squeezed all of the following beats too close together, making an already jumpy commercial too jumpy.

thanks for the insightful critique shakran

amire

I honestly think that I prefer the somewhat shaky camerawork. If the shot were completely smooth, it would feel too artificial and fake. The purpose of the commercial is to remind all of us of our grandparents when we were young. It emulates a shaky home video, which is much more likely to make me think of such things.

shakran

I'm a TV photojournalist KFG.

There are two schools of thought on the handheld vs. sticks. I'm from the school that says the camerawork should not be noticed, and should mimic the human eye. Unless you're in the habit of jumping up and down while watching Grandpa pour the ketchup, I think it should be steady

Also, and this is just me (well, me and the entire NPPA ) I don't buy the argument that we should shoot as though we were in an earthquake just because the audience is used to it. We're also used to bad TV shows like Big Brother, but that doesn't mean we who make content shouldn't try to do better If you have to go off the sticks, use a steadicam or if you can't afford one (I'm assuming you're shooting with a small cam, not the fullsized ENG cam) make one by getting a tripod, attaching it to the camera, keep the legs folded, but extend them a bit, lock the head down, and hold it by the head. . . The legs extending below your hand will form a counterweight that will help keep it steadier without being rock solid.



Now if you're going to mimic a home video, then off the sticks is OK, but do it as all one shot - -this could work too if you do it well enough. But if you sequence and edit the shots, it no longer looks like a home movie.

KungFuGuy

I try to motivate the cinematography through what's happening in the story. I'm not saying shake the camera up just because you can or because the audience wants it. Shake the camera if there's a plot driven reason to do so. Keep the camera still if there's a reason to do so.

Hand held camera is becoming more acceptable for commercial television because audiences are more used to those styles now.

I didn't say that the motivation for my shooting handheld was because of audience acceptance. If filmmakers waited for audience acceptance to do anything we would still be in the silent era and never have had talkies.

The clarification for it being a commercial is because commercials tend to be on the tail end of the curve, as clients typically want their commercials to be airable all the time, and represent their product as inoffensively as possible. This is not a great thing, but its the way it works. (it's also why foreign commercials are more fun to watch!)

For this shoot I did put the camera on a mono-pod with a weight at the bottom to act as a counterbalance. Not very comparable to a steadicam, but it's what I had to work with.

I used handheld to impart a homey feeling that would remind people of home video. It was my motivated decision, and for some people it will work, for others it will not. But thats everything right?

shakran

absolutely. I gave my opinon, but that certainly doesn't mean it's the only one out there, or even the best

analog

Agreed. If you really want "home video feel", you'd really want to actually set the stage for it with the storytelling, not just go handheld because that seems to be hot right now.

Handheld is definitely being used a lot right now, but there are still plenty of instances where the "in" or "popular" methods don't actually enhance the production. I think you're better off going with a mounted camera, not moving.

And yes, longer suspense on the ketchup not falling, and a closeup of the kid smiling wide and proud would be good.

(I also agree on the lighting suggestion, but as it wasn't something you could do without reshooting the entire thing, I didn't think to bring it up.)