Weaponry-Related One-Liners - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Plan9 · 03-05-2011, 09:34 PM

Tilted Weaponry with Gun Guy Humor

...

I'll start:

It is not considered proper to change the selector switch roll stamps on your M4A1 from "SAFE, FIRE and AUTO" to "NAH, YEAH and OOOH YEEEAH!"

Hektore · 03-06-2011, 08:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plan9

OOOH YEEEAH!"

Unless you're a giant pitcher of kool-aid

Plan9 · 03-07-2011, 10:17 PM

"Hang out at the gun range and meet a nice girl that not only shoots, but doesn't lean back when she's on the firing line."

monkeysugar · 03-08-2011, 02:32 AM

"Hang out at the gun range and meet a nice girl that not only shoots, but doesn't lean back when she's on the firing line."

Read more: http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/tilted-...#ixzz1G0DTQgGp

QFTMFT. Don't try to teach your girlfriend how to shoot. Befriend a female rangemaster, and date her. If you can't or won't do that, have HER teach your girlfriend how to shoot.

Zeraph · 03-08-2011, 12:17 PM

Well someone has to put this classics in here,
"A reporter asked a U.S. Marine what he felt when he shot a terrorist, the Marine responded "Recoil"

And of course,
"You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya, punk?'"

And...
"I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die."

And...
"Say hello to my little friend!"

SSJTWIZTA · 03-19-2011, 08:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monkeysugar

QFTMFT. Don't try to teach your girlfriend how to shoot. Befriend a female rangemaster, and date her. If you can't or won't do that, have HER teach your girlfriend how to shoot.

i dont know about that. my girlfriend used to be a "leaner." Now she can actually snap shoot a shotgun. she's getting fucking quick.

telekinetic · 03-19-2011, 11:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plan9

Tilted Weaponry with Gun Guy Humor

...

I'll start:

It is not considered proper to change the selector switch roll stamps on your M4A1 from "SAFE, FIRE and AUTO" to "NAH, YEAH and OOOH YEEEAH!"

A friend of mine had his engraved with a hand giving the peace sign for safe, and hand giving the finger for fire, and says if he ever gets an auto, he will have a hand giving the shocker for the happy switch.

edit: found the pic:

Plan9 · 04-23-2011, 09:58 PM

Another military-related joke:

"It's pretty bad to be in the soldier business when the public opinion selector switch [safe, fire, auto] went from WAITING TO STRIKE, FREEDOM!, AMERICA: FUCK YEAH! to GET SHOT AT, HOST COUNTRY JAIL, INTERNATIONAL INCIDENT."

KirStang · 04-23-2011, 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plan9

Another military-related joke:

"It's pretty bad to be in the soldier business when the public opinion selector switch [safe, fire, auto] went from WAITING, FREEDOM!, AMERICA: FUCK YEAH! to GET SHOT AT, HOST COUNTRY JAIL, INTERNATIONAL INCIDENT."

Ok. This made me laugh.

citadel · 04-23-2011, 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by telekinetic

A friend of mine had his engraved with a hand giving the peace sign for safe, and hand giving the finger for fire,

Damn, I want one of those now.

Plan9 · 04-23-2011, 10:09 PM

Here's a winner:

Hi-Point Firearms and Priorities:

...because you're defending your life with a gun that costs half of what you paid for your last video game console. And that's okay with you.

...

Also:

Quote:

Originally Posted by telekinetic

Billet AR Lowers:

...because you need a trigger guard sturdy enough to repel off a helicopter skid with on your hobby plinker.

monkeysugar · 04-24-2011, 01:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SSJTWIZTA

i dont know about that. my girlfriend used to be a "leaner." Now she can actually snap shoot a shotgun. she's getting fucking quick.

Nice! still working on that. In other news, she has discovered that ar-15= much more loud and much more fun/expensive than a .22. Dammit. Guess it's time to start looking at a progressive press.

Sorry, OP. one liner....kinda. Still my favorite. "Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everyone you meet."

Shadowex3 · 04-24-2011, 07:59 AM

"A bullet may have your name on it but splash damage is addressed 'To Whom It May Concern'"

and in an argument I ended not too long ago:

"Look, people will argue about caliber and muzzle velocity as long as there are guns, but at the end of the day everybody agrees on one thing: buckshot works".

LordEden · 04-24-2011, 12:09 PM

03-05-2011, 09:34 PM	#1 (permalink)
Plan9 I Confess a Shiver	Weaponry-Related One-Liners Tilted Weaponry with Gun Guy Humor ... I'll start: It is not considered proper to change the selector switch roll stamps on your M4A1 from "SAFE, FIRE and AUTO" to "NAH, YEAH and OOOH YEEEAH!" __________________ *Whatever you can carry.* "You should not drink... and bake."

03-07-2011, 10:17 PM	#3 (permalink)
Plan9 I Confess a Shiver	"Hang out at the gun range and meet a nice girl that not only shoots, but doesn't lean back when she's on the firing line." __________________ *Whatever you can carry.* "You should not drink... and bake." Last edited by Plan9; 03-07-2011 at 10:33 PM..

03-08-2011, 02:32 AM	#4 (permalink)
monkeysugar I'll be on the veranda, since you're on the cross. Location: Rand McNally's friendliest small town in America. They must have strayed from the dodgy parts...	"Hang out at the gun range and meet a nice girl that not only shoots, but doesn't lean back when she's on the firing line." Read more: http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/tilted-...#ixzz1G0DTQgGp QFTMFT. Don't try to teach your girlfriend how to shoot. Befriend a female rangemaster, and date her. If you can't or won't do that, have HER teach your girlfriend how to shoot. __________________ I've got the love of my life and a job that I enjoy most of the time. Life is good.

03-08-2011, 12:17 PM	#5 (permalink)
Zeraph Banned Location: The Cosmos	Well someone has to put this classics in here, "A reporter asked a U.S. Marine what he felt when he shot a terrorist, the Marine responded "Recoil" And of course, "You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya, punk?'" And... "I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die." And... "Say hello to my little friend!" Last edited by Zeraph; 03-10-2011 at 03:31 PM..

04-23-2011, 09:58 PM	#8 (permalink)
Plan9 I Confess a Shiver	Another military-related joke: "It's pretty bad to be in the soldier business when the public opinion selector switch [safe, fire, auto] went from WAITING TO STRIKE, FREEDOM!, AMERICA: FUCK YEAH! to GET SHOT AT, HOST COUNTRY JAIL, INTERNATIONAL INCIDENT." __________________ *Whatever you can carry.* "You should not drink... and bake."