Monty Python Sketch - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

fairsquare · 06-10-2004, 07:03 PM

Here is the thread inspired by a Monty python sketch and another post.

You must repond to the original post by saying how the previous person had it good, and then go on to mimic the previous person's situation, only saying how yours is slightly worse...

We will start with a true post from another thread:

Quote:

Last night, I'm making dinner. My wife comes home and tells me about her day, etc. Warns me she's PMSing and I shouldn't get her angry. Bad sign right there.

Few minutes go by. Like I said, I'm making dinner, and I see there's a pan that's been on the stove since the night before with yucky burnt egg stuff in it. I ask politely, "Baby, can you clean up that pan for me?" She replies, "Do you need it?" I say, no, just would like to get it out of my way while making dinner.

She storms upstairs. We don't talk the rest of the night, even though she does come down to get the dinner I made.

All day today, we don't talk.

Come home tonight, we kinda start talking again. She asks if I need anything. I say, "A hug." She comes back with "I don't know if you've earned one yet."

I say, "Don't even know what I did to deserve not to get one." She says because I asked her to clean this pan last night, and that she had just gotten home from work, and I wasn't respecting her and she had just warned me about PMSing, etc, and my timing is "always terrible".

Anyway, we haven't talked again since. All because I asked her to clean a pan.

Let this be a warning to all guys wanting to get married. This could be your future. Of course, it has been rather nice to have these nights to myself

ibis · 06-10-2004, 09:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by fairsquare
Here is the thread inspired by a Monty python sketch and another post.

You must repond to the original post by saying how the previous person had it good, and then go on to mimic the previous person's situation, only saying how yours is slightly worse...

We will start with a true post from another thread:

WTF

Skettios · 06-10-2004, 11:45 PM

I don't get it either.

Love,

Skettios

Rlyss · 06-11-2004, 02:45 AM

Look up the Four Yorkshiremen sketch in Google. It's about these four old guys saying 'We had it tough', and the others saying 'Well we had it even tougher!'

So in response to:

"She asks if I need anything. I say, "A hug." She comes back with "I don't know if you've earned one yet."',

someone could say:

"That's nothing! I asked for a hug and she gave me one, but kneed me in the balls and said I should be grateful! I had it rough I tell ya."

Gilson · 06-11-2004, 12:22 PM

Oh, I only WISH I could get a kick in the balls. When I ask for a hug my wife just beats me with my severed arm. You don't even want to KNOW what I asked for to get the arm severed.

denim · 06-11-2004, 01:15 PM

Luxury.

I said "boo" to her, and she cut off me balls. All for twisting her tits! I mean, c'mon.

(people 'round here, they just don't know their Monty Python. Infants! Infants, I tell you!)

Tophat665 · 06-11-2004, 02:02 PM

Oh, you think you have it bad? I looked at my wife once, and she nailed my Jon Thomas to the floor, cut my arm off and beat me in the head until I ran in circles!

hawkeye · 06-11-2004, 10:17 PM

you get to run in circles? you lucky bastard. My girl has a strange attraction to odd shapes, right now, I'm running a pattern so complicated that it took me twenty-seven minutes to type this, as I can only type three letters before I'm out of range again.

oblar · 06-12-2004, 12:20 AM

Bah, at least she lets you run! My girl makes me hop, blindfolded, wherever I am going! She takes particular thrill when I have to go through doorways, because if I don't time my hops just right I get a sore noggin.

ahh, to be able to run again. I can't even get this jarring motion out of my head, its like my head was put into a blender!

kiwiman · 06-14-2004, 01:38 AM

A blender! I would've killed for a blender!

My girl makes me look at pictures of her grandmother while we're engaging in intercourse! It's all very well, but i'd wish my girl would stop intruding on mine and Ethel's only night alone.

fairsquare · 06-14-2004, 06:51 AM

you've got it easy!!

My girlfriend makes me have intercourse with her grandmother while looking at pictures of her!!

denim · 06-14-2004, 10:15 AM

You think you've got it rough!

My girlfriend makes me have intercourse with her grandfather while looking at pictures of Willie Nelson!

Slauncha Man · 06-14-2004, 06:45 PM

Ha! You guys don't know what you're talking about!

My girlfriend makes me masturbate looking at Willie Nelson, which she videotapes and sends to Willie Nelson! And the whole time, the only lube I'm allowed is lemon juice!

analog · 06-14-2004, 09:18 PM

OH if I only had lemon juice! When she's not pouring salt and hot oil on it, she's putting out cigarette butts on it!

And you got Willie Nelson? I had Craig T. Nelson. Talk about a forehead!

Man i love Monty Python...

ElwoodBlues · 06-15-2004, 12:06 AM

you think thats bad? my girlfriend hot glues razor blades to my fingers, then makes me masturbate to willie nelson, all the while videotaping

you think you got it bad that she sends the tape to willie nelson? My lady sends the tape straight to my 8th grade guidance counselor!

06-10-2004, 11:45 PM	#3 (permalink)
Skettios Condition: Stable and Improving Location: Finger on the little red button.	I don't get it either. Love, Skettios __________________ Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies. Frederich Nietzsche

06-11-2004, 02:02 PM	#7 (permalink)
Tophat665 Minion of the scaléd ones Location: Northeast Jesusland	Oh, you think you have it bad? I looked at my wife once, and she nailed my Jon Thomas to the floor, cut my arm off and beat me in the head until I ran in circles! __________________ Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

06-11-2004, 10:17 PM	#8 (permalink)
hawkeye back from sabbatical Location: Mosptopia	you get to run in circles? you lucky bastard. My girl has a strange attraction to odd shapes, right now, I'm running a pattern so complicated that it took me twenty-seven minutes to type this, as I can only type three letters before I'm out of range again. __________________ You're not fat, You're just a giant ball of love, covered in anger.

06-12-2004, 12:20 AM	#9 (permalink)
oblar Über-Rookie Location: No longer, D.C	Bah, at least she lets you run! My girl makes me hop, blindfolded, wherever I am going! She takes particular thrill when I have to go through doorways, because if I don't time my hops just right I get a sore noggin. ahh, to be able to run again. I can't even get this jarring motion out of my head, its like my head was put into a blender! __________________ "All that we can do is just survive. .All that we can do to help ourselves is stay alive." - Rush

06-14-2004, 06:45 PM	#13 (permalink)
Slauncha Man Crazy Location: Ann Arbor, MI	Ha! You guys don't know what you're talking about! My girlfriend makes me masturbate looking at Willie Nelson, which she videotapes and sends to Willie Nelson! And the whole time, the only lube I'm allowed is lemon juice! __________________ -Slauncha

06-11-2004, 02:45 AM	#4 (permalink)
Rlyss The Pusher Location: Edinburgh	Look up the Four Yorkshiremen sketch in Google. It's about these four old guys saying 'We had it tough', and the others saying 'Well we had it even tougher!' So in response to: "She asks if I need anything. I say, "A hug." She comes back with "I don't know if you've earned one yet."', someone could say: "That's nothing! I asked for a hug and she gave me one, but kneed me in the balls and said I should be grateful! I had it rough I tell ya."

06-11-2004, 12:22 PM	#5 (permalink)
Gilson Upright	Oh, I only WISH I could get a kick in the balls. When I ask for a hug my wife just beats me with my severed arm. You don't even want to KNOW what I asked for to get the arm severed.

06-11-2004, 01:15 PM	#6 (permalink)
denim Banned Location: Massachusetts, USA	Luxury. I said "boo" to her, and she cut off me balls. All for twisting her tits! I mean, c'mon. (people 'round here, they just don't know their Monty Python. Infants! Infants, I tell you!)

06-14-2004, 01:38 AM	#10 (permalink)
kiwiman Crazy Location: New Zealand	A blender! I would've killed for a blender! My girl makes me look at pictures of her grandmother while we're engaging in intercourse! It's all very well, but i'd wish my girl would stop intruding on mine and Ethel's only night alone.

06-14-2004, 06:51 AM	#11 (permalink)
fairsquare Upright Location: Seattle	you've got it easy!! My girlfriend makes me have intercourse with her grandmother while looking at pictures of her!!

06-14-2004, 10:15 AM	#12 (permalink)
denim Banned Location: Massachusetts, USA	You think you've got it rough! My girlfriend makes me have intercourse with her grandfather while looking at pictures of Willie Nelson!

06-14-2004, 09:18 PM	#14 (permalink)
analog Banned	OH if I only had lemon juice! When she's not pouring salt and hot oil on it, she's putting out cigarette butts on it! And you got Willie Nelson? I had Craig T. Nelson. Talk about a forehead! Man i love Monty Python...

06-15-2004, 12:06 AM	#15 (permalink)
ElwoodBlues Psycho Location: Massachusetts	you think thats bad? my girlfriend hot glues razor blades to my fingers, then makes me masturbate to willie nelson, all the while videotaping you think you got it bad that she sends the tape to willie nelson? My lady sends the tape straight to my 8th grade guidance counselor! __________________ I think Pringles initial intention was to make tennis balls. But on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. But Pringles is a laid back company. They said "Fuck it. Cut em up." -Mitch Hedberg, '68-'05 Bauer's the man.