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Old 12-06-2003, 11:50 PM   #1 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Anchorage Alaska
Girls are confusing

LOL i love life. Lemme tell you. Lemme recap the past few weeks for everyone. Going with this girl for a while, she decides to goto school up north about 8 hours away and was talkin like she wanted to break up. So I did. Well that wasn't what she wanted so I pulled some stuff to get her back and thought I did( read the "I'm an idiot post")...I mean we went back to our normal ways. Then she was giving me tips on how to get a girl that "is 800x better than her". I was like wtf?! so i posted about that (**** buddies) and tried to figure stuff out. Well I didn't. So i called her last night and we was talking and said she wanted to read me something she wrote....(she's a amazing writer) it was a poem.... she talked about everything she told me(the way i touched her, the way she still wanted me to see her, the way she dreams of me sleeping in the same bed with her....just to sleep( that is VERY relaxing.)....etc, etc. Then she says the problem is that it wasn't about me. That sucked....silence....able to hear any shard of hope shatter away. ANYWAY, after doing some driving around being upset and all, I came home and talked to my ex-gf, who is now pretty much my best friend. She just told me to sit back and let her realize what she is missing out on. So i was like ok. I got online and my ex(the one that this is all about) was online so I was bullshittin with her, then outta the blue she was like I lied about all the stuff on the phone.....then wouldn't explain what she meant cuz she didn't know. SO i was like yea whatever, just call me when you do figure it out. and that is the end of my story......boring I know. It's funny, I thought I would be in a shittier mood, but I'm not. So maybe it was a good thing.
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Old 12-07-2003, 12:32 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Quote:
Then she says the problem is that it wasn't about me.
Quote:
outta the blue she was like I lied about all the stuff on the phone.....then wouldn't explain what she meant cuz she didn't know.
This sounds - I dunno - very odd to me, to say the least. I'm not sure how you can really conclude this is a good thing, I wouldn't really know how to feel if a girl did this to me, though.

I once knew a girl that said - within 30 minutes of meeting her - "I used to be a stripper, I got drunk all the time and slept with all of the guys. Did you want to fuck?" to which my reply was "Uh? What? No." "Your loss." Then a few days later, "Oh, I forgot to tell you, I was just testing you to see what your intentions were." I proceeded to walk away quickly.
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Old 12-07-2003, 02:27 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: North of Mexico, South of Canada
She doesn't know what she wants with her life right now and theirs not really much that can be done about it. She has maturing to do and needs to grow up on her own before she's ready for a relationship. I don;t know your age but your manner of train of thought sentances leads me to believe between 16-19 and that's an age when most young women are still growing emotionally and just begining to understand who they are. Same goes for most males this age.
Aside from my usual argument of no meaningful discussion has ever been held over AIM (ever), the reality is that she's not giving you answers because she doesn't know them herself.

If and when she's ready to talk or if you simply must speak to her, do so in person and trust your gut if it says that it's not something that can be worked out.

Your young and have most of life in front of you, never burn a bridge but understand that if someone does not know themselves, they are not ready to be know by others.
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Old 12-07-2003, 02:48 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: Anchorage Alaska
18 and 19 are our ages... she has pretty much been on her own since she was 16. Her parents just got seperated after 21 yrs of marriage. I think she is kinda afriad to end up like them in the future...you know?
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Old 12-07-2003, 03:00 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Location: Sydney, Australia
Just give it a while and things will set in, and you'll think completely different..

Do you want to be with her? Obviously you do, just say I will give you time to sort out your head and I will be here for you !!!

If not, then.. just let it go.
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Old 12-07-2003, 03:32 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: Anchorage Alaska
Quote:
Originally posted by Zorvox
Just give it a while and things will set in, and you'll think completely different..

Do you want to be with her? Obviously you do, just say I will give you time to sort out your head and I will be here for you !!!

If not, then.. just let it go.
That's pretty much what I told her last night. I was all I know what I want, you know what I want, but you need to figure out what you want. So I told her I was going to lay off calling her and that she could call me when she was good and ready. Lone Behold she calls me like a few minutes after I started this topic... Yea. Who knows. Oh well I got a job to go to in the am so lata.

BTW this isn't really a question (the topic) it was just me ranting and giving of frustrations.
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Old 12-07-2003, 09:27 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Girls are crazy. I know, I'm one.
You'll just have to fine one that is LESS crazy than the ones you're finding now. heheheh.
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Old 12-07-2003, 06:05 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: Anchorage Alaska
I guess, the damn girl called me @ 3am to tell me she missed me....grrr.
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Old 12-07-2003, 06:10 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: Sydney, Australia
Don't have any involvement, you could even go as far as to call her and say "I want us to be together" you make the decisions, i'm not going to force you in to anything...

Let her know that she has the options, give her as much time as she want's, she's probably just all mixed up over it all man... give her time to fix her head
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Old 12-07-2003, 07:10 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Divorce of your parents (even at her age) is still pretty devastating. It might take her awhile to get over that.
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Old 12-07-2003, 09:15 PM   #11 (permalink)
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I'm not making a comment at all.
Because I don't know shit what women want.

And I don't believe what they say,
because what they say, and what they do are different.

Then again men could be the exact same way,
but I don't have to deal with them,
so they don't frustrate me.

Last edited by rogue49; 12-07-2003 at 09:17 PM..
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Old 12-07-2003, 11:18 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Location: Sydney, Australia
rogue49 is smart, so smart infact he is dead right.

Women are confusing, sometimes I think that they are just animals without a clue.. they really make no sense and generally fall back on what they say, and some times can be very cruel.

But yes as always, same with men..

Human's are.... well, weird.
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Old 12-08-2003, 12:51 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Location: Anchorage Alaska
agree

Quote:
Originally posted by skysooner
Divorce of your parents (even at her age) is still pretty devastating. It might take her awhile to get over that.
I know what your saying, she did a research paper for school on Divorces and how the effects it has on the children. Very good report....
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Old 12-08-2003, 07:10 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Wow. That's a real bummer man. I feel ya.
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Old 12-08-2003, 08:23 PM   #15 (permalink)
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IMHO

Knock the bottom, (sorry Bobby) I mean errrrrr sides out. Take pictures so when you are a dirty old man your friends will believe you.

And Jacket your Rabbit!

ROFLMAO!
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Old 12-08-2003, 10:27 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Quote:
Girls are confusing
Welcome to life.
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Old 12-08-2003, 10:28 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Location: Cali
What he said ^
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Old 12-08-2003, 11:48 PM   #18 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Anchorage Alaska
Quote:
Originally posted by Boo
IMHO

Knock the bottom, (sorry Bobby) I mean errrrrr sides out. Take pictures so when you are a dirty old man your friends will believe you.

And Jacket your Rabbit!

ROFLMAO!
lol what ya mean knock the sides out?
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Old 12-09-2003, 06:58 PM   #19 (permalink)
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You might have to do a little side-side....

( i )
( i )
( i )
( i )

to work the sides.

ROFLMAO!
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Old 12-09-2003, 07:05 PM   #20 (permalink)
Loves my girl in thongs
 
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Location: North of Mexico, South of Canada
Quote:
Originally posted by Boo
You might have to do a little side-side....

( i )
( i )
( i )
( i )

to work the sides.

ROFLMAO!
Your not making sense to all of us, care to fill us in on the joke?
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Old 12-09-2003, 09:57 PM   #21 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Anchorage Alaska
lol don't worry Boo...this one is like my mermaid....only um....blonde. So i wont have to move too much to the side
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Old 12-11-2003, 02:48 AM   #22 (permalink)
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Location: Anchorage Alaska
I got it figured out, she doesn't want to get attached because she is leaving for school in the middle of January...so she is acting the way she is because she doesn't want either one of us to get hurt. Which is understandable.... I'm SO proud...I figured this out ALL on my own, then asked her....go me.
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Old 12-14-2003, 08:53 AM   #23 (permalink)
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shes stupid move on
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Old 12-14-2003, 01:19 PM   #24 (permalink)
don't ignore this-->
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by skysooner
Divorce of your parents (even at her age) is still pretty devastating. It might take her awhile to get over that.
In my experience, it was the marriage that was more devastating than the divorce. My family was much better for it. And I was 15 at the time. I felt that way then and I still feel that way.

If she really thinks that by pushing away the guys in her life to avoid committment, she'll just end up lonely. A girl this crazy I could live without.
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Old 12-16-2003, 12:13 AM   #25 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Anchorage Alaska
Yea, I went over to see how she was doing after some surgery she had done last week and her mom said she was "too sick to see me"....which is odd since she is only supposed to get better and I seen her the night before and she was fine. So I'm saying fuck it. I'm admitting I am single and dont have a girlfriend. And I am moving on to better things. She wants to act like that towards me, she don't deserve my love.
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Old 12-16-2003, 07:27 AM   #26 (permalink)
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Yes, it sounds like you are better off. I went through lots of heartache when I was dating until I met my wife. Even with her there have been ups and downs but luckily more ups.

BermuDa-I agree that the marriage is generally more devastating. In restrospect it is better, but when it happens it is the worst thing in the world (particularly when you don't see it coming). Maybe that was naive on my part not to see my parent's divorce coming, but my mom was an alcoholic and that kind of skews your reality.
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Old 12-16-2003, 11:05 AM   #27 (permalink)
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Time to move on my friend. There are plenty of other mentally screwed women out there to be confused over. Then, in time, you will find the one that just seems to fit into your life. I haven't found it yet, but I almost have my Psychiatric Degree in Relationships.
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Old 12-16-2003, 08:09 PM   #28 (permalink)
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Location: Anchorage Alaska
Quote:
Originally posted by water_boy1999
Time to move on my friend. There are plenty of other mentally screwed women out there to be confused over. Then, in time, you will find the one that just seems to fit into your life. I haven't found it yet, but I almost have my Psychiatric Degree in Relationships.
Haha, Well I can say I tried to do everything right with this one. My g/f before her was great to me, yet all I ever seemed to do was play mind games. I was 18(19 now) and have learned so much from my great losses. I don't think mistakes are bad, unless you don't learn from them. And I have learned yet again....So many fish in the sea....and so little time to go fishing
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Old 12-16-2003, 09:14 PM   #29 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by dumbnutofak
I'm SO proud...I figured this out ALL on my own, then asked her....go me.
YOU FIGURED OUT A WOMAN!?! I DIDN'T THINK THAT A MAN COULD DO THAT!!!
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Old 12-17-2003, 12:06 AM   #30 (permalink)
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Location: Far too far from my Angel....
Quote:
Originally posted by NiceGuy
YOU FIGURED OUT A WOMAN!?! I DIDN'T THINK THAT A MAN COULD DO THAT!!!
We can't. It's all an illusion, man.

As for the original topic of this thread: I say "good for you" for realizing that you're single, and for getting on with your life. It sounds like the girl in question is looking for a bit of control in the relationship. I'm not saying she's trying to be controlling, just that she's trying to find something which she can feel she's able to deal with and handle. Let's face it: relationships can be confusing, turbulent things; finding someplace in one where control can be had is often not possible.

But whether she's just playing head-games with you or not, you shouldn't be expected to take that kind of crap - not from someone who you're involved with. Oh, the occasional bout of angst or other grief is inevitable - we're human, after all - but anything ongoing is just abuse.

You're better off without her. Use what you've learned and find someone worth your while.
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