A Letter from the dumped - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Harshaw · 11-02-2003, 10:24 PM

This is something that I have seen a lot lately. Not just happening to me, but a few other people I know, and well, I need to rant. This is a lot of pent up anger that needs to be vented in one place or another.
Ok, we all know breaking up is really painful and hard and no one likes to do it. The person doing the breaking probably doesn’t want to do the breaking and the person getting broken-up on sure as hell doesn’t want that to happen. But for everyone’s sanity, if you are the party that wants out… don’t beat around the damn bush; break up, quick like a band-aid. I don’t care if you find the act distasteful, or you don’t want to hurt the other person’s feelings, you have a duty. Don’t wuss out, don’t act all distant and hope the other person “gets it”. Fucking break it off already. Hopefully you had feelings for this person at some point or another, the decent thing to do it crush them quick instead of dragging it out for weeks or even months. Sure the breakee should hopefully have enough backbone to know what is going on and get out, but I can tell you, with many people that isn’t going to happen. For the sanity of the person you once called “special” just do it already.

Your's Truly

Dumped

spived2 · 11-02-2003, 10:39 PM

Amen. It hurts a lot more having to carry on not knowing if the person you are with still wants to be with you or not. at least if it is done quickly you can move on with your life a lot faster.

anti fishstick · 11-02-2003, 10:43 PM

what if you didn't see it coming at all in the first place. and you thought everything was hunky dory and then BAM. and you're wondering wtf you did wrong and why they had to abandon you.

spived2 · 11-02-2003, 10:52 PM

That's their perogative I guess. If one party doesn't want to stay in a relationship, it's their responsibility to tell the other party. It will only cause a lot more problems and heartache to carry on with it.

analog · 11-02-2003, 11:48 PM

I say Amen as well. Just do it already, huh? Even if it is sudden and unexpected, as long as you give some sort of reason, what's the beef? You can't break up without a GOOD reason? Not like you're married or anything... if you're just dating, or whatever you want to call it, and you decide you don't like the situation any more, there shouldn't be an argument over why you're going. You're going. Maybe you're sorry, but you're going all the same. Dragging it out does no service to the dumpee, all it does is make them feel on edge for a long time, not knowing if they're about to be dumped at any time.

Good thread.

Gelfling · 11-03-2003, 06:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by analog
I say Amen as well. Just do it already, huh? Even if it is sudden and unexpected, as long as you give some sort of reason, what's the beef?

Too bad you don't listen to your own advise....

Kurl · 11-03-2003, 06:54 AM

yeah that truley sucks to be strung along and maybe even cheated on when they could have just broken up with you.

skysooner · 11-03-2003, 10:33 AM

It has happened to me before, and it stinks. I would rather know and be hurt for a little while rather than having it drug out so that you are thinking there is a chance of getting back together.

11-02-2003, 10:24 PM	#1 (permalink)
Harshaw Is mad at you. Location: Bored in Sacramento	A Letter from the dumped This is something that I have seen a lot lately. Not just happening to me, but a few other people I know, and well, I need to rant. This is a lot of pent up anger that needs to be vented in one place or another. Ok, we all know breaking up is really painful and hard and no one likes to do it. The person doing the breaking probably doesn’t want to do the breaking and the person getting broken-up on sure as hell doesn’t want that to happen. But for everyone’s sanity, if you are the party that wants out… don’t beat around the damn bush; break up, quick like a band-aid. I don’t care if you find the act distasteful, or you don’t want to hurt the other person’s feelings, you have a duty. Don’t wuss out, don’t act all distant and hope the other person “gets it”. Fucking break it off already. Hopefully you had feelings for this person at some point or another, the decent thing to do it crush them quick instead of dragging it out for weeks or even months. Sure the breakee should hopefully have enough backbone to know what is going on and get out, but I can tell you, with many people that isn’t going to happen. For the sanity of the person you once called “special” just do it already. Your's Truly Dumped __________________ This too shall pass.

11-02-2003, 10:39 PM	#2 (permalink)
spived2 Desert Rat Location: Arizona	Amen. It hurts a lot more having to carry on not knowing if the person you are with still wants to be with you or not. at least if it is done quickly you can move on with your life a lot faster. __________________ "This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished, as the once vital voice of the verisimilitude now venerates what they once vilified. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose vis-à-vis an introduction, and so it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V." - V

11-02-2003, 10:43 PM	#3 (permalink)
anti fishstick Post-modernism meets Individualism AKA the Clash Location: oregon	what if you didn't see it coming at all in the first place. and you thought everything was hunky dory and then BAM. and you're wondering wtf you did wrong and why they had to abandon you. __________________ And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anais Nin

11-02-2003, 10:52 PM	#4 (permalink)
spived2 Desert Rat Location: Arizona	That's their perogative I guess. If one party doesn't want to stay in a relationship, it's their responsibility to tell the other party. It will only cause a lot more problems and heartache to carry on with it. __________________ "This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished, as the once vital voice of the verisimilitude now venerates what they once vilified. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose vis-à-vis an introduction, and so it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V." - V

11-02-2003, 11:48 PM	#5 (permalink)
analog Banned	I say Amen as well. Just do it already, huh? Even if it is sudden and unexpected, as long as you give some sort of reason, what's the beef? You can't break up without a GOOD reason? Not like you're married or anything... if you're just dating, or whatever you want to call it, and you decide you don't like the situation any more, there shouldn't be an argument over why you're going. You're going. Maybe you're sorry, but you're going all the same. Dragging it out does no service to the dumpee, all it does is make them feel on edge for a long time, not knowing if they're about to be dumped at any time. Good thread.

11-03-2003, 06:54 AM	#7 (permalink)
Kurl Upright	yeah that truley sucks to be strung along and maybe even cheated on when they could have just broken up with you.

11-03-2003, 10:33 AM	#8 (permalink)
skysooner Registered User Location: Oklahoma	It has happened to me before, and it stinks. I would rather know and be hurt for a little while rather than having it drug out so that you are thinking there is a chance of getting back together.