08-29-2003, 08:56 PM | #2 (permalink) |
Riiiiight........
|
can she come to full orgasm if she masturbates herself? If that is the case, perhaps you might want to observe her as she masturbates herself, and pick up some pointers there.
When you are performing oral sex on her, ask her to feedback to you what feels good, and what does not. She could even shift her hips, and grind her hips while you stay still, to show you what motions are pleasurable for her. keep going at it. It took us a few tries to be able to bring each other to orgasm. Don't worry about it, and just enjoy the fun and intimacy of being so close to her. it will come. |
08-29-2003, 09:54 PM | #4 (permalink) |
Tilted
Location: Redwood City, CA
|
A lot of times it's a mental block. She's so worried about not having an orgasm that she just can't focus on the experience and lose herself in the moment. Try to remove any pressure from the situation. Instead of trying to make her have an orgasm, tell her you just want her to enjoy the experience. Take it slow, see what feels good but don't get hung up on making her cum, and don't act dissapointed if she doesn't get off.
Give it time, it can take a long time for her to truly lose her self-consciousness, but once she does she'll have the orgasm of a lifetime |
08-30-2003, 05:50 AM | #5 (permalink) |
Degenerate
Location: San Marvelous
|
Many, if not most, women do not orgasm from intercourse alone. It takes clitoris stimulation for it to happen. Encourage her to rub her clit while you are having intercourse. Or the two of you can watch each other masturbate. Perhaps she needs to learn to orgasm in front of you.
Two questions: Has she ever orgasmed from intercourse? Does she orgasm from masturbation?
__________________
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam. |
08-30-2003, 08:08 AM | #6 (permalink) |
Boy am I horny today
Location: T O L E D O, Toledo!!
|
Apply stimulation on the clit while you are doing one or the other. A good vibe can help her, if she's too far along, she won't be able to control it, it you are applying the vibe to her clit. I gave a few girls their first O by doing that.
|
08-30-2003, 04:15 PM | #7 (permalink) |
Loser
Location: Far too far from my Angel....
|
It might be a form of "performance anxiety". Yes, I'm serious. If she's so focused on the fact that she's not having an orgasm, it can prevent her from actually having one. This was alluded to in a previous reply, but I thought I'd clarify it a bit.
To work around this, I'd suggest taking steps to make her as relaxed as possible. Pour her a hot bubble bath and let her relax with a glass or two of wine. Follow it up with a slow, sensual massage, making it as relaxing as possible - so focus on those shoulders and her spine...not her tits and ass! Paying attention to her ankles and calves is also a great idea - not a lot of guys will massage down there as a rule; also try her feet if she's not terribly ticklish. Once she's relaxed, slowly begin arousing her by tracing your fingertips over her body - I recommend starting on her back as it's not overtly sexual when you do that. As she begins to become aroused, work in some gentle kisses over the body areas you've just traced with your fingers. Things will eventually take their own course, and with a little luck (and a lot of attention on your part) you will hopefully give her what you've been wanting her to have.....that BIG-O! Good luck! Last edited by wry1; 08-30-2003 at 04:17 PM.. |
08-30-2003, 09:17 PM | #9 (permalink) |
Upright
Location: Nanaimo, Canada
|
My GF could never have orgasms....
we were together for 3 yrs... and we broke up for stupid reasons but continued to have sex. The moment we broke up we started having the best sex of our lives and she had orgasms 85% of the time. Were back together now and she still orgasms... basically the problem was too much pressure. Once she relaxes and just enjoys.... the orgasm will come |
08-30-2003, 10:59 PM | #10 (permalink) |
Semi-Atomic
Location: Home.
|
First, how old is she? Has she had any 'bad' expeirinces?
Assuming that she's a normal healthy young woman, than I'd say she's probably just thinking too hard about having one to actually have one. I know I couldn't have an oragasm with my boyfriend (now husband) for awhile. Give her some time and it should work itself out. Make sure you help her feel comfortable with herself and her body, since that's a hangup that most women have and can really be a detractor from having fun during sex.
__________________
Someday, someone will best me. But it won't be today, and it won't be you. |
08-31-2003, 05:16 PM | #11 (permalink) |
Crazy
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
|
What wry1 said, but you might not have to work quite that hard (though it is always appreciated)
Give her a couple drinks to reduce her inhibitions (not so much that she doesn't know what she's doing) as a first step, and see if that works. If not, have you tried doing it with her on top? Easier for you (or her) to stimulate a lot of places that way, if you can do it
__________________
We may lose, and we may win, but we will never be here again. |
08-31-2003, 08:20 PM | #12 (permalink) |
Tilted
Location: Long Beach CA
|
I, myself, am a girl who cannot orgasm during intercourse, even oral. She may have entirely different problems than me, but let me tell you: what everone's saying about getting her to relax = good idea. Just make sure that you're not putting any pressure on her.
Most guys (at least in my experience) seem obsessed with the idea of getting their girl to orgasm. First of all consider the fact that sex can be very pleasureable without an orgasm. Its not as if YOU'RE a failure and neither is she. Second, the fact that guys are so obsessed with this has caused me problems in the past. I really don't want to go into it to much, but one bf physically, emotionally, and mentally scarred me with obsession of making me orgasm. Another boyfriend just kept worrying about it and being concerned that in telling him everytime that he wasn't doing anything wrong, I felt like a failure. Just be careful not to hurt her feelings in your pursuit of her pleasure. |
Tags |
iniate, orgasm, woman |
|
|