Why are girls raised without their dads more sexually active? - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Vaultboy · 07-30-2003, 06:57 AM

Read and give opinions. I'd especially like to hear from the momz on the boards, or girls who were raised without their dads. This article does not venture possible reasons why. I'd like us to discuss it.....

Quote:

Absent dads lead teen girls to sex - study

July 30 2003 at 09:47AM

The absence of a natural father has a greater impact on the sexual behaviour of teenage girls than was previously realised, researchers claim.

Many studies have shown that girls who grow up without a father are more likely to be sexually active at an early age and fall pregnant in their teens.

The usual explanation is stress factors caused by the lack of a father, such as lower household income and higher rates of domestic violence or depression.

This is said to trigger some innate mechanism which spurs a girl on to passing her genes on earlier. But new research in the United States and New Zealand - the two Western countries with the highest teen pregnancy rates - has cast doubt on the theory.

Girls raised with stepfathers engage in sexual activity even earlier
The findings suggest that the absence of a father has an effect which is nothing to do with psychological stress.

"The study rules out that these teenage girls are at risk for early pregnancy only because absence of the father introduces stressors into the home," said psychologist Bruce Ellis, from the University of Canterbury in Christchurch, New Zealand, who led the research.

Ellis and colleagues followed more than 700 girls from pre-school age to 17 or 18.

They monitored 10 different aspects of their lives including family income, behavioural problems, exposure to violence and parenting styles.

The researchers confirmed that teenage girls raised without fathers were more likely to suffer from depression, drop out of school and have other behavioural difficulties. But their early sexual behaviour was most strongly influenced solely by the presence or absence of a father.

Other work by Ellis's team had previously suggested that girls raised with stepfathers engage in sexual activity even earlier.

It was the lack of a natural father, rather than a father figure, which seemed to be important.

One possibility was that the girls learned "dating behaviour" at an early age by mimicking their mothers.

James Chisholm, an expert on early puberty at the University of Western Australia in Perth, said: "The study certainly suggests that some Factor X triggers early sexual activity in girls who grow up without their fathers, but it is difficult to work out what the mechanism might be."

Ellis cautioned that the findings should not be seized upon by advocates of traditional families. - Sapa-DPA

bigoldalphamale · 07-30-2003, 07:50 AM

this is nonsense...all girls are sluts. period.

thedrake · 07-30-2003, 07:52 AM

well not are all sluts...but not all are not either....that is the only truth

TNJ4555 · 07-30-2003, 08:13 AM

Vaultboy: Wait until you have a daughter and then give me a call.

48yrs old w/ 16 year old
She's my proof that God has a sense of humor
I might not remember what I had for breakfast but I certainly remember what I was like when I was 16

lurkette · 07-30-2003, 08:20 AM

I'd like to see a lot more about the study before I comment, but have they accounted for other factors like socio-economic status, parental behavior, abuse, drug/alcohol use (both the girl's and the parents'), etc.

I guess what I'm saying is: is it the absence of the father that causes this, or some other factor related to the father's absence (either that caused his absence or caused by his absence) that leads to more sexual activity?

And bigoldalphamale, if you're not joking then I'm a bit offended by your statement. No, a lot offended.

grayman · 07-30-2003, 08:22 AM

Maybe it is because girls without fathers don't have anyone around to threaten and intimidate possible suitors.

ratbastid · 07-30-2003, 08:37 AM

My personal take is, girls without fathers turn to the boys around them to fill the "man" void in their lives. They're looking for a father figure in the male critters they're surrounded with. But the relationship they get with boys around them isn't <i>exactly</i> parent-child....

Ah, dimestore psychology! I love it so!

Evil Milkman · 07-30-2003, 08:37 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by bigoldalphamale
this is nonsense...all girls are sluts. period.

And so are all boys, too. I've realized something recently that really made a lot of sense... "Everyone is a slut, just to different degrees."

My friends say I'm Socrates now because of that.

Trilidon · 07-30-2003, 08:50 AM

I honestly believe it.

I think fathers preach to there daughters about love and sort of set the standard for what they want in a man, and its kind of the same with moms and there sons.

tinfoil · 07-30-2003, 08:55 AM

I don't think this is true. I would rather think that in some cases the mother is not willing or able to make up for the role played by the father and that is what causes it.

Trilidon · 07-30-2003, 09:02 AM

I dont think a mother is capable of filling the role of a father, and vice versa.

They can try, and do rather well. But its nothing close to a real father/mother

bigoldalphamale · 07-30-2003, 09:29 AM

lurkette, i did not mean to offend. as a mature and educated man, i know that my previous blanket statement was uncalled for. as such, i will adjust the statement to read:

this is nonsense. MOST girls are sluts. period.

sexymama · 07-30-2003, 09:37 AM

I want to know if the level of the biological father's involvement in his daughter's life was looked at. Does anyone know? I want to believe that if the parents maintained a positive relationship for the sake of the children and if the father maintained a good relationship with the daughter, then the daughter would not have a need to find "male love" through early sexual exploration.

Leviathan[NCV] · 07-30-2003, 09:59 AM

Actually, women have a genetic need for male attention (there are some exempt) in their life, and if they aren't getting it from their fathers, they are more likely to look elsewhere.

Men use intamacy to get sex, women use sex to get intamacy. Vicous cycle.

ADayWithoutRain · 07-30-2003, 10:11 AM

quot: _____________________________________________________________Originally posted by ratbstid
My personal take is, girls without fathers turn to the boys around them to fill the "man" void in their lives. They're looking for a father figure in the male critters they're surrounded with. But the relationship they get with boys around them isn't exactly parent child.... _____________________________________________________________

Yeah, totally agree...that, & girls also I think find it harder to find negative aspects in men, rather than just positive...I always remember my dad telling me no one would ever get w/me unless he's proven himself to me...& my man knows this

lurkette · 07-30-2003, 10:26 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by bigoldalphamale
lurkette, i did not mean to offend. as a mature and educated man, i know that my previous blanket statement was uncalled for. as such, i will adjust the statement to read:

this is nonsense. MOST girls are sluts. period.

air45 · 07-30-2003, 01:45 PM

my question is how may a man (for example, i am referring to me) use this information study to find women for intercourse?

there is usually no way to decipher the parentage of a young lady in the discotheque, so this is me scratching my head.

killerjoejoe · 07-30-2003, 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by air45
my question is how may a man (for example, i am referring to me) use this information study to find women for intercourse?

there is usually no way to decipher the parentage of a young lady in the discotheque, so this is me scratching my head.

Im gonna have to agree with air45 on this one

bukaki22 · 07-30-2003, 02:36 PM

Its a typical case of " Love me, daddy"

RelaX · 07-30-2003, 03:12 PM

Hey, this is Nicole I'm on my friends name. I have first hand experiance with this. I grew up without my dad cause hes a truck driver. I can imagine why girls would be more sexually active, I personally am not. Still waiting to fall in love. But you turn to men to fill the gap like a couple people already said. U dont get the attention u need, your mother definatly cant be both no matter how hard she trys. You dont have a male teaching you how you should be treated by a man or what kind of man is good for you. I guess it could work both ways.... one of my sisters moved in w/ a MUCH older man right out of high school and is still w/ him. Maybe because of the fact that he would never leave her, she has that stability and love she needs. My other sister has had a nonstop boyfriend her whole life, I dont think shes ever been single. Me on the other hand, I stay away from it for the most part. When u have a father ( if u can call him that, more like sperm donor) that is gone all the time it definatly causes lots of issues, a lot w/ being able to trust a guy and get over your fear of them leaving you. At least w/ me. I had a ' surigate' father for about 4 years when I was younger.... I had never had that kind of attnetion from a man so I didnt really know that the attention I was getting wasnt really the right kind all of the time. The realtionship ending horribly.... I hope more guys out there step up to the plate because daughters really need you. Anyways thats just a few of my thoughts....

raeanna74 · 07-30-2003, 04:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ratbastid
My personal take is, girls without fathers turn to the boys around them to fill the "man" void in their lives. They're looking for a father figure in the male critters they're surrounded with. But the relationship they get with boys around them isn't <i>exactly</i> parent-child....

Ah, dimestore psychology! I love it so!

I would agree. My father was not completely absent. In fact my parents never even separated let alone divorced. He is still alive to day even. BUT he was a workaholic. He was always gone doing this job or that and wasn't often available for the time I felt I needed. He was never there emotionally for me. In fact I think I was the more emotionally stable one in my family. My Dad was always depressed (to the point of suicidal), My mom was constantly controlling, and my younger brother was so full of anger that he was arrested several times for assault and battery charges. I don't know which of those things were the deal maker/breaker for me but I did find that when I was a pre-teen I craved guy attention to the point of doing almost anything to gain it. I had sexually fantasies in late elementary school and masterbated even then. As an adult I feel that because of my father's parental absence I have sought male "leadership" anywhere even in the wrong places and wrong ways.

angela146 · 07-30-2003, 04:21 PM

Having a father gave me a point of reference. In my teenage years, a boy had to be a good guy like my dad in order for me to think about getting close to him.

Not having had a step father, I don't know for sure what that affect would be. However, I would think that many girls with step fathers think of their natural father as their "real" father and he is the standard they use to measure boys.

This second part is mostly speculation.

World's King · 07-30-2003, 05:51 PM

Most of the girls that I've porked had fathers...

And if they didn't they called me daddy.

hobo · 07-30-2003, 05:58 PM

Here is my theory. Father's are very protective of their daughters. The fear that their father might find out they are having sex and do something to the guy in anger is something that keeps the girl from having sex early on. It is also because the father tends to scare guys away from his daughter. Step-fathers don't care as much about that because they are not as emotionally attached to the daughter so they do less of what natural fathers do.

em1014 · 07-30-2003, 06:12 PM

Personally, I agree with most of what has been said about girls wanting to fill the void their father left. I also think the question lurkette raised about other factors being considered is very important. A little background about me.... I was basically raised without a father. My parents divorced when I was 5 or so. At that time my dad decided he had his own life to focus on for a while before his children could be incorporated into it. My brother and I lived with my mom and saw my dad maybe once a month and then it was for a day visit. It has only been in the last couple of years that I see my dad on a regular basis (I'm 18 now) and still yet a regular basis consists of every- other weekend. My mom dated my step father for 7 years before they got married 4 years ago, but they have never lived together and probably never will. I know, confusing. Anyway, to the point.. I didn't become sexually active at a young age (just this year). I give my mother credit for that because she was very open with us, not to mention the fact I always wanted to please her. I guess my imput into why a girl may do this is beacause she lacks the control in her own life and can get that from a relationship, especially in a relationship that involves sex. As far as the step-father issue, when you add the fact another person (someone who for a large part the girls don't have a choice in) is becoming part of their already unbalanced family.. there goes the last bit of routine and control they had. I don't really know... just an idea thrown into the mix.

slimshaydee · 07-30-2003, 06:17 PM

Obligitory Innapropriate/unfunny statement:
*spank* whos your daddy?

Slims · 07-30-2003, 10:29 PM

It seems obvious to me:

These girls don't have a dad to scare the shit out of potential boyfriends.

I Brow · 07-31-2003, 02:32 AM

I went out with a girl who's parents were divorced and she lived with her mom because her dad died when she was younger. And i can say right now that she is very adventurous[:-)]. After we broke up, she went to go live in another state with her stepmom who she gets a long with more.

I just ran into her the last couple of weeks, which is really weird because she had been gone for a year now and she's still the same blonde little girl* begging for attention.

*She's actually 2 years my senior, which puts her around 21 now.

I know for a fact i could have a lot of fun with her. But that just wouldn't be right... Damn morals and ethics

StormBerlin · 07-31-2003, 09:42 PM

I think it's all based on how you are raised...I have a few friends who were raised without their dads and their not sluts because they know their mother loves them and knows how to raise them. My personal opinion is that girls are more sexually active when dad isn't wround because they are trying to use sex to get love from a male party. Isn't that a Freudian theory?

Amethyst · 08-03-2003, 09:58 AM

I totally agree that most girls that don't have fathers in there lives are more sexually active. I am one of those girls. I didn't have a father growing up and I ended up having a baby at the age of 16. I am not blaming that on not having a father. But I was looking for some kind of love from a male. I thought that if I had sex with these guys they would love me. Now I see the error in my ways but then I was a stupid teenager.

SadDad · 06-28-2011, 08:47 AM

From the initial post it would appear there is no hope and nothing can make a difference without the "natural" dad. I refuse to believe this! Can some of you women that have grown up in this situation let me know what made or would have made a difference in your life to prevent or at least mitigate some of the damage. At present I am witnessing all of the negative stuff discussed here and in child development studies. To you who have been there; what would have made a difference in your life? Could someone other than your biological father have made that difference? What works, what doesn't? How do I deal with the overly and sometimes overtly physically aggressive behavior without hurting her or driving her away? Sometimes I think rather than allowing parents adopt kids the kids should adopt the parents. In some situations it might work better that way.

07-30-2003, 08:20 AM	#5 (permalink)
lurkette My future is coming on Moderator Emeritus Location: east of the sun and west of the moon	I'd like to see a lot more about the study before I comment, but have they accounted for other factors like socio-economic status, parental behavior, abuse, drug/alcohol use (both the girl's and the parents'), etc. I guess what I'm saying is: is it the absence of the father that causes this, or some other factor related to the father's absence (either that caused his absence or caused by his absence) that leads to more sexual activity? And bigoldalphamale, if you're not joking then I'm a bit offended by your statement. No, a lot offended. __________________ "If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing." - Anatole France

07-30-2003, 08:22 AM	#6 (permalink)
grayman you can't see me Location: Illinois	Maybe it is because girls without fathers don't have anyone around to threaten and intimidate possible suitors. __________________ That's right - I'm a guy in a suit eating a Blizzard. F U.

07-30-2003, 08:55 AM	#10 (permalink)
tinfoil Fucking Hostile Location: Springford, ON, Canada	I don't think this is true. I would rather think that in some cases the mother is not willing or able to make up for the role played by the father and that is what causes it. __________________ Get off your fuckin cross. We need the fuckin space to nail the next fool martyr.

07-30-2003, 09:37 AM	#13 (permalink)
sexymama My own person -- his by choice Location: Lebell's arms	I want to know if the level of the biological father's involvement in his daughter's life was looked at. Does anyone know? I want to believe that if the parents maintained a positive relationship for the sake of the children and if the father maintained a good relationship with the daughter, then the daughter would not have a need to find "male love" through early sexual exploration. __________________ If you can go deeply into lovemaking, the ego disappears. That is the beauty of lovemaking, that it is another source of a glimpse of god It's not about being perfect; it's about developing some skill at managing imperfection.

07-30-2003, 03:12 PM	#20 (permalink)
RelaX Follower of Ner'Zhul Location: Netherlands	Hey, this is Nicole I'm on my friends name. I have first hand experiance with this. I grew up without my dad cause hes a truck driver. I can imagine why girls would be more sexually active, I personally am not. Still waiting to fall in love. But you turn to men to fill the gap like a couple people already said. U dont get the attention u need, your mother definatly cant be both no matter how hard she trys. You dont have a male teaching you how you should be treated by a man or what kind of man is good for you. I guess it could work both ways.... one of my sisters moved in w/ a MUCH older man right out of high school and is still w/ him. Maybe because of the fact that he would never leave her, she has that stability and love she needs. My other sister has had a nonstop boyfriend her whole life, I dont think shes ever been single. Me on the other hand, I stay away from it for the most part. When u have a father ( if u can call him that, more like sperm donor) that is gone all the time it definatly causes lots of issues, a lot w/ being able to trust a guy and get over your fear of them leaving you. At least w/ me. I had a ' surigate' father for about 4 years when I was younger.... I had never had that kind of attnetion from a man so I didnt really know that the attention I was getting wasnt really the right kind all of the time. The realtionship ending horribly.... I hope more guys out there step up to the plate because daughters really need you. Anyways thats just a few of my thoughts.... __________________ The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents. - Nathaniel Borenstein

07-30-2003, 07:50 AM	#2 (permalink)
bigoldalphamale Loser	this is nonsense...all girls are sluts. period.

07-30-2003, 07:52 AM	#3 (permalink)
thedrake Banned Location: Iowa	well not are all sluts...but not all are not either....that is the only truth

07-30-2003, 08:13 AM	#4 (permalink)
TNJ4555 Tilted Location: Jersey	Vaultboy: Wait until you have a daughter and then give me a call. 48yrs old w/ 16 year old She's my proof that God has a sense of humor I might not remember what I had for breakfast but I certainly remember what I was like when I was 16

07-30-2003, 08:37 AM	#7 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	My personal take is, girls without fathers turn to the boys around them to fill the "man" void in their lives. They're looking for a father figure in the male critters they're surrounded with. But the relationship they get with boys around them isn't <i>exactly</i> parent-child.... Ah, dimestore psychology! I love it so!

07-30-2003, 08:50 AM	#9 (permalink)
Trilidon Tilted	I honestly believe it. I think fathers preach to there daughters about love and sort of set the standard for what they want in a man, and its kind of the same with moms and there sons.

07-30-2003, 09:02 AM	#11 (permalink)
Trilidon Tilted	I dont think a mother is capable of filling the role of a father, and vice versa. They can try, and do rather well. But its nothing close to a real father/mother

07-30-2003, 09:29 AM	#12 (permalink)
bigoldalphamale Loser	lurkette, i did not mean to offend. as a mature and educated man, i know that my previous blanket statement was uncalled for. as such, i will adjust the statement to read: this is nonsense. MOST girls are sluts. period.

07-30-2003, 09:59 AM	#14 (permalink)
Leviathan[NCV] Well... Location: afk	Actually, women have a genetic need for male attention (there are some exempt) in their life, and if they aren't getting it from their fathers, they are more likely to look elsewhere. Men use intamacy to get sex, women use sex to get intamacy. Vicous cycle.

07-30-2003, 10:11 AM	#15 (permalink)
ADayWithoutRain Upright	quot: _____________________________________________________________Originally posted by ratbstid My personal take is, girls without fathers turn to the boys around them to fill the "man" void in their lives. They're looking for a father figure in the male critters they're surrounded with. But the relationship they get with boys around them isn't exactly parent child.... _____________________________________________________________ Yeah, totally agree...that, & girls also I think find it harder to find negative aspects in men, rather than just positive...I always remember my dad telling me no one would ever get w/me unless he's proven himself to me...& my man knows this

07-30-2003, 01:45 PM	#17 (permalink)
air45 Loser Location: Midwest	my question is how may a man (for example, i am referring to me) use this information study to find women for intercourse? there is usually no way to decipher the parentage of a young lady in the discotheque, so this is me scratching my head.

07-30-2003, 02:36 PM	#19 (permalink)
bukaki22 Tilted	Its a typical case of " Love me, daddy"

07-30-2003, 04:21 PM	#22 (permalink)
angela146 Loser Location: Somewhere near Hubby	Having a father gave me a point of reference. In my teenage years, a boy had to be a good guy like my dad in order for me to think about getting close to him. Not having had a step father, I don't know for sure what that affect would be. However, I would think that many girls with step fathers think of their natural father as their "real" father and he is the standard they use to measure boys. This second part is mostly speculation.

07-30-2003, 05:51 PM	#23 (permalink)
World's King Here Location: Denver City Denver	Most of the girls that I've porked had fathers... And if they didn't they called me daddy. __________________ heavy is the head that wears the crown

07-30-2003, 05:58 PM	#24 (permalink)
hobo Archangel of Change	Here is my theory. Father's are very protective of their daughters. The fear that their father might find out they are having sex and do something to the guy in anger is something that keeps the girl from having sex early on. It is also because the father tends to scare guys away from his daughter. Step-fathers don't care as much about that because they are not as emotionally attached to the daughter so they do less of what natural fathers do.

07-30-2003, 06:12 PM	#25 (permalink)
em1014 Crazy	Personally, I agree with most of what has been said about girls wanting to fill the void their father left. I also think the question lurkette raised about other factors being considered is very important. A little background about me.... I was basically raised without a father. My parents divorced when I was 5 or so. At that time my dad decided he had his own life to focus on for a while before his children could be incorporated into it. My brother and I lived with my mom and saw my dad maybe once a month and then it was for a day visit. It has only been in the last couple of years that I see my dad on a regular basis (I'm 18 now) and still yet a regular basis consists of every- other weekend. My mom dated my step father for 7 years before they got married 4 years ago, but they have never lived together and probably never will. I know, confusing. Anyway, to the point.. I didn't become sexually active at a young age (just this year). I give my mother credit for that because she was very open with us, not to mention the fact I always wanted to please her. I guess my imput into why a girl may do this is beacause she lacks the control in her own life and can get that from a relationship, especially in a relationship that involves sex. As far as the step-father issue, when you add the fact another person (someone who for a large part the girls don't have a choice in) is becoming part of their already unbalanced family.. there goes the last bit of routine and control they had. I don't really know... just an idea thrown into the mix.

07-30-2003, 06:17 PM	#26 (permalink)
slimshaydee If you've read this, PM me and say so Location: Sitting on my ass, and you?	Obligitory Innapropriate/unfunny statement: spank whos your daddy?

07-30-2003, 10:29 PM	#27 (permalink)
Slims Eccentric insomniac Location: North Carolina	It seems obvious to me: These girls don't have a dad to scare the shit out of potential boyfriends. __________________ "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill "All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

07-31-2003, 02:32 AM	#28 (permalink)
I Brow Upright	I went out with a girl who's parents were divorced and she lived with her mom because her dad died when she was younger. And i can say right now that she is very adventurous[:-)]. After we broke up, she went to go live in another state with her stepmom who she gets a long with more. I just ran into her the last couple of weeks, which is really weird because she had been gone for a year now and she's still the same blonde little girl* begging for attention. *She's actually 2 years my senior, which puts her around 21 now. I know for a fact i could have a lot of fun with her. But that just wouldn't be right... Damn morals and ethics

07-31-2003, 09:42 PM	#29 (permalink)
StormBerlin Happy as a hippo Location: Southern California	I think it's all based on how you are raised...I have a few friends who were raised without their dads and their not sluts because they know their mother loves them and knows how to raise them. My personal opinion is that girls are more sexually active when dad isn't wround because they are trying to use sex to get love from a male party. Isn't that a Freudian theory? __________________ "if anal sex could get a girl pregnant i'd be tits deep in child support" Arcane

08-03-2003, 09:58 AM	#30 (permalink)
Amethyst Addict Location: Illinois	I totally agree that most girls that don't have fathers in there lives are more sexually active. I am one of those girls. I didn't have a father growing up and I ended up having a baby at the age of 16. I am not blaming that on not having a father. But I was looking for some kind of love from a male. I thought that if I had sex with these guys they would love me. Now I see the error in my ways but then I was a stupid teenager.

06-28-2011, 08:47 AM	#31 (permalink)
SadDad Upright	From the initial post it would appear there is no hope and nothing can make a difference without the "natural" dad. I refuse to believe this! Can some of you women that have grown up in this situation let me know what made or would have made a difference in your life to prevent or at least mitigate some of the damage. At present I am witnessing all of the negative stuff discussed here and in child development studies. To you who have been there; what would have made a difference in your life? Could someone other than your biological father have made that difference? What works, what doesn't? How do I deal with the overly and sometimes overtly physically aggressive behavior without hurting her or driving her away? Sometimes I think rather than allowing parents adopt kids the kids should adopt the parents. In some situations it might work better that way. Last edited by SadDad; 06-29-2011 at 06:44 PM..