MrFriendly

Melbourne trains are a wonderful place in which one can kill time and observe humanity at it's finest. It's especially wonderful because said trains rarely afford you any choice in the matter, often leaving its close to 950 occupants (600 passenger loading max recommended) feeling chipper and in fine spirits.

It was on such a train one morning I realised there are certain personality traits in women that I find incredibly sexually appealing. We're discarding all physical attributes here. For you see, I never did even get a chance to see this vixen.

Why did I find her sexually appealing? Listening to her friends and her talk one thing was obvious: she was a total odd ball. Likes to take photos of dead birds and post them at dive bars kind of odd ball, flies kites at night while listening spoken word versions of cooking for Benjy the rabid dog. Don't ask me how or why, I don't know, I just found it incredibly sexually appealing.

So, anyone out there find certain personality traits sexually attractive? Are you able to articulate why?

__________________
You are not a slave

Jinn

Confidence, but that's kind of an obvious one - I'd rather a woman *know* she's hot shit rather than me having to reassure her of same daily. I'm turned on by someone who knows they turn people on.

Business savvy... if a woman is financially independent and tell me about why she chose a roth IRA over a traditional IRA, why she's contributing 6% to her 401k instead of 10%, what the value of a given stock ticker is that day, or even just says the word "diversify". I reckon this is for the same reason as the above - a confidence of control and self-determination.

Honor - a woman who gets up to let an disabled/elderly person sit in that seat on the bus, who opens a door for a man and graciously accepts the inverse, helps someone out who is a few dollars short at the checkout counter - that sort of thing would get my loins a'burnin'...

__________________
"I'm typing on a computer of science, which is being sent by science wires to a little science server where you can access it. I'm not typing on a computer of philosophy or religion or whatever other thing you think can be used to understand the universe because they're a poor substitute in the role of understanding the universe which exists independent from ourselves." - Willravel

Baraka_Guru

Down-to-earthiness. Basically: a straight-shootin', no-bull-shittin' kind of gal.

Also, being generally non-materialistic beyond life's necessities. Basically: a gal who seeks experiences, not stuff.

I think the two are more or less linked.

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

KirStang

Confident, adventurous. Happy and pleased about her body. Tender, eager to please, smart, tough..etc.

I'll have to add more to this later. Hopefully I don't get ambushed and called a misogynist again.

__________________

snowy

Intelligence. There is really nothing more appealing to me than a smart guy.

Friendliness. My husband is the kind of guy complete strangers say hi to. He isn't particularly outgoing, but he just appears to be so friendly that everyone wants to say hello.

What Jinn refers to as honor I would call politesse, and I find it very attractive. I don't want a guy to pull my chair out or open my car door, but I do like a guy who says please, thank you, opens the door when my hands are full of stuff, says thank you when I hold the door for him, and does stuff like what Jinn mentioned. I thank the Boy Scouts for instilling this in my husband.

Curiosity. I am a very curious person; I like that my mate is very curious too.

__________________
If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

jewels

Love a guy who likes to have fun talking to total strangers with me.



Add to that short list: A love of literally driving off the path. That turn off the dirt road you pass sometimes? He wants to see what unknown mystery might be there awaiting discovery. Someone who can enjoy some spontaneity and veering off the plan.

__________________
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
Mark Twain

Lindy

Direct. Competent. Adult values. I value adult vibes and guys who can take care of themselves and competently run their own lives. Without a mom.

Mentally quick. Intelligent without being either ponderous or flighty.

Confident and purposeful. Consistent and steady, with direction.

Honest and responsible in word and deed. With a warm but not bleeding heart.

Expressive and appreciative. Quirky but not too weird.

Hard to articulate, but (apologies to Justice Potter Stewart) I know it when I see it.

Lindy

MrFriendly

And to add to my OP, bookish types, I want nothing more than to nail that. There's just a certain kind of geek that I find an extraordinary turn on.

If I'm being really honest, and this is something I don't admit out too loud in my country, a personality with a hint of bogan, but just a hint.

Keep in mind, I'm talking specifically about traits I find sexually appealing.

Addendum: Super uptight bitchy women. I want NOTHING to do with them outside of the bed, but every single super bitch I've come across I've always fantasized about. And I work in IT support, wouldn't would believe some of the super bitches I've come across.

__________________
You are not a slave

Charlatan

An odd sense of humour and the ability to give as good as she gets when sparing with humour.

Intelligent (kind of goes hand in hand with the humour). Whether it's politics, art, whatever, I like to have someone who can hold up their end of a discussion. I don't want to be a monologist.


Kind of like Katherine Hepburn, Lauren Bacall, or my wife.

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

bagatelle

My husband doing the chores around the house briskly. We have lots to do in the yard and also part time farming beside his day job. Do-It-Yourself man is appealing to me.

In other men their loyalty for their spouses and family is contradictingly appealing.

Banter with humor and smartness added to vivid use of vocabulary.

__________________

Skitto

Sly intelligence, I love a gal who's smarter than me, and that's not a low bar to start with.

__________________
Yeah, well, you're just that awesome, I guess. It's not like I guessed so anyways.

-mia

Sometimes I'll meet someone and they're just different. They make me see things differently. It's the things they do and the way they do them, the way they think. What the most beautiful thing about them is, they make you think differently too.

lunxpress

For me inquisitiveness and enthusiasm are very charming, but the one trait that must be present, if I am to find you attractive, would be the ever- popular swagger. The right proportion of macchismo in conjunction with vulnerability, can render me speechless. Something about this opposition is very appealing to me. I like high contrasts. Tough, but kind of a pussy underneath it all.

I dunno. I love that.

Zeraph

I love a girl that will talk, ask questions, be forward. I also, like the OP, *love* oddballs. I have great interest in analyzing people. Usually I can predict and figure out anybody within minutes to an hour, but with oddballs its like I can be myself. No need to try and predict because I can't. And I get to have fun analyzing them.

Oh and I guess I like a someone-what dark woman. Because they tend to be into BDSM or at least be open to it.

intak758

I like a certain combination of personality traits that I've only been able to find in one person... humbleness, lots of confidence, friendly and very secure in themselves, a goofball, but also reserved in someways and keeps their personal business to themselves.

I think the real kicker that's so tricky to find in someone is confidence and humbleness. Usually people who are confident tend to like attention, want to be noticed, etc, so it's hard to find someone who never shows off or talks up themselves for the sake of attention...

MrFriendly

Which isn't really confidence when you think about it, they're still craving validation from others because they're not secure in themselves.

As for another personality trait I've decided makes me incredibly amorous, mischievous.

__________________
You are not a slave

Jrock

I like openness in a person; someone who is not afraid to be themselves, and who makes me feel comfortable with being open myself.

Strange Famous

kindness, empathy: but probably more than anything else something that I dont know the right word for - the closest I can think is vivaciousness (if thats a word). Someone who is lively, had a passion for things and engagement with the world.

Then again, Im the opposite - in real life Im quite an insular, gloomy and moody person. Which is probably why Ive never been in a relationship that lasted longer than two years.

__________________
"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

The Gospel of Thomas

ASU2003

Nice, helpful, girly (wears pink, ponytail, sundresses), fun and happy.

Shadowex3

Intelligence, honesty, wit, and... I don't know what the proper word is but you could call it "Command", that kind of aura of personality where when they tell a jumpy dog to Sit the owner does as well.

__________________

Plan9

The ability to field strip a Kalashnikov.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."