Aladdin Sane

This thread is inspired by a similar thread in the Ladies Lounge. I thought it would be instructive to the TFP men, because I don't believe most men know that many woman do not reach orgasm the same way men do--from the penis thrusting in and out of the vagina.

The poll is for the ladies, but the discussion is for everyone. So ladies, do you orgasm during intercourse-- meaning from thrusting alone? Or, does it take something more? If it takes more when you are with a partner, what does it take?

My wife has never had an orgasm from straight intercourse. She has rarely cum while I am in her. I am OK with it now, but I'll tell you, her inability to cum from intercourse was a big disappointment to me at first. I wanted to make her cum with my penis. Maybe it's a guy thing. Maybe it was a misconception gained from watching too much porn. Fact is, it just doesn't work that way for her. She orgasms from oral and from stimulation of her clit with fingers or a vibe-- and she is fine with it.

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Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.

abaya

Hey, at least you're honest about why you had those thoughts. I must say, I had no problem orgasming from masturbation (wayyyy before I ever bought a vibe, using just my fingers alone), but when I started having sex, I felt immense pressure to cum from intercourse on its own. Fact is, it was never going to happen that way, no matter how hard we both tried... and it took me a long time to accept that. I think I'm still trying to figure out a way that I can cum that way (fantasizing has brought me a long way, in terms of helping me cum very quickly during oral, etc--maybe it could work for intercourse?)... but I guess in some way, I don't think it's going to happen.

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And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

james t kirk

Some women do and some women don't.

I've met women who've never ever had an orgasm anyway, anyhow.

I've met women who can only come by their own hand.

And I've met women who explode in orgasmic fury when they are having intercourse. I've even met 2 women who came just GIVING head.

There's so much variation out there isn't there.

Charlatan

My wife is an always (or almost always). If she's lying to me, I don't want to know.

__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke

ratbastid

Round my house, one pretty much always does and one never does.

Good news is, the one that doesn't is WAY orgasmic via clitoral stimulation, while the other's clit is often too sensitive to address directly.

lotsofmagnets

never had any probs with the ex in that regard and she would definitely cum several times but i did find it easier fingering her. also rubbing her during sex made her go crazy.

__________________
mother nature made the aeroplane, and the submarine sandwich, with the steady hands and dead eye of a remarkable sculptor.
she shed her mountain turning training wheels, for the convenience of the moving sidewalk, that delivers the magnetic monkey children through the mouth of impossible calendar clock, into the devil's manhole cauldron.
physics of a bicycle, isn't it remarkable?

868686

Same situation with magnets with my current SO. I can believe she has never really finished during intercourse with just thrusting, and again, I can relate to Mr.Sane, I have watched my years worth of porn (half my life). Despite all misconceptions, I am a very sexually knowledgable person and have been using the internet years before I ever lost virginity, and always used the internet and the census to persist advantage. My favourite rules are:

- Sex is for pleasure. For your pleasure.
- There are many ways to orgasm (male or female)
- Someone else out there has always experienced what you have, animals (including humans) have been doing it for years

I usually get her off with clitoral, oral, fingering, rubbing, or just about anything else I can throw at her. Hair, neck, shoulders, chest, stomach, thighs, ass, legs, as long as I am rubbing something else, she gets off. That makes me feel like I am doing my job -- my natural, essential, sexual duty to get her off. God, I love making love to her.

snowy

I almost always come from intercourse; I can probably count the times I haven't on one hand (to be honest, I don't think about it much). Lucky me.

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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Makia

Haven't ever orgasmed from penetration alone. Granted, I'm not THAT experienced with it, but if it was something that was easy for me, it would have happened by now =P

levite

Can I just say, of the small group of women through whom I've cut a sexual swath, only two ever came during intercourse: one occasionally, one almost always. All the others didn't, and were frank about the fact that they never had and didn't expect to.

Doesn't bother me at all. This is why God gave me a tongue. Who cares which organ I use, as long as I can manage to give a woman screaming orgasms until she cries and begs for mercy?

__________________
Dull sublunary lovers love,
Whose soul is sense, cannot admit
Absence, because it doth remove
That thing which elemented it.

(From "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning" by John Donne)

mixedmedia

I vote always, because it's always if I want to. Sometimes I don't need or want to orgasm. I just enjoy the, uh, conjugation.

Sometimes it does take effort on my part to come, especially in positions other than missionary and on top, and sometimes they come slip-sliding along very quickly and with little to no conscious effort on my part. But it's something that I worked at...I went into this on the other thread. Don't have time to re-write it this morning...

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Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

ShaniFaye

I voted always....as I said in the LL thread, the few times I havent was because I was drunk and when Im drunk I cant feel anything...anywhere lol

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I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!

Jenna

I voted always. I always do, and usually have more than one.

Aladdin Sane

So far, 52% of respondents report orgasm from intercourse alone either always or usually. I realize ours is not a scientific sample, but I am still surprised. I expected the numbers in these categories to be much lower. An expert at the Foundation for Intimacy suggests that only about 30% of woman orgasm during intercourse (http://findarticles.com/p/articles/m...18/ai_90683766). The Kinsey Institute puts the number at one-third (http://64.233.167.104/search?q=cache...ient=firefox-a).
An article on the BBC website puts the number of women who orgasm during intercourse much lower at 25% (http://www.bbc.co.uk/relationships/s...yorgasm.shtml). Does this point to a difference in TFP women? Or is something else at work?

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Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.

little_tippler

A sample of 19 voters so far, is not very representative.

It could also be that in our particular sample most of the girls can orgasm from intercourse alone...though sadly I do not count myself among those lucky ladies. If there is a secret to it I don't know about, I'm hoping one of the ladies will share so we can all benefit

__________________
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

TurbineSlut

The poll was for the ladies, but I voted for my fiancee anyways, just to get a bigger sample size. :-)

Anyways, she has never had an orgasm, which I find really sad for her. I've been able to get previous girls I dated to cum with various ways, and although my fiancee says she feels like she almost gets there, she's scared of what it will really be like.

I've tried many things, long oral (which I've made a girl come with before - so its not my technique) and stimulation with my fingers during intercourse (which she likes), I even got her a small vibrator, which she likes for a while, but then when she gets too excited she gets scared and wants to stop using it.

I've kind of gotten used to it, but still think its a huge shame that she's never experienced the pure joy of an orgasm. We've talked about it quite a bit, she doesn't really see it as a problem, but I would still really like it if she could orgasm as well.

Do any of you have any suggestions to get her to go that last mile?

Thanks!

Daniel_

This matches my experiences. The one who reliably did seemed to be triggered by the sensation she felt upon being ejaculated into (anywhere).

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╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine
╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝

little_tippler

Denial I tell you. I've never had one from intercourse but I sure as hell want one dammit.

__________________
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

snowy

I can't say there is some super secret to having an orgasm during intercourse; I think in my case it's largely anatomy (prominent g-spot) combined with a girthy cock that fits well and can reach my anterior and posterior fornices easily.

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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Xerxys

Master, Teach me!!!!!

AmyE

I voted never but it should have been "not yet".

I had sex for the first time a few months ago, with my now ex (It was short relationship but I'm fine with it) and I never came. I don't know why. I consider myself a pretty 'sexually liberated' person. I don't have many hang ups about sex and the ones that I do, I admit.

I think it was mostly inexperience, on both sides. Both of us hadn't had sex before, so we were new to it. I didn't expect anything fantabulouse.

So maybe someday I'll come simply though intercourse...

...or maybe someday I'll come period.

Cross your fingers.

yay4tay

^ It's going to be exceedingly difficult for you to figure out how to come through intercourse if you haven't on your own, yet.

I recommend the bathtub faucet or a hitachi magic wand.

I'd address the original post, but I already answered it in the one in the Ladies Room.

Vulcan558

I can easily cum via intercourse - with him pushing onto my G Spot while I am on my knees however, I prefer other methods. I am lucky to 'wet up' really easily.
We both prefer him bringing me to a clitoral orgasm, by use of toys, oral and fingers. He will bring me to the brink about 5 or 6 times then allow me to orgasm so strongly. Then he climbs on top and drives me really hard. This makes me cum over and over again until he does. The we both collapse in a heap and go to sleep in each others arms - and we are in our mid 60's!

ÐiGiRed

I've only been able to have an orgasm during intercourse a few times.. and all with the same guy. It also seems to happen a lot easier when we're in one certain position.

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Don't drink and park, accidents in cars cause people.

little_tippler

Seeing as according to your post in the Ladies Lounge you come all the time, it seems a bit callous to say the above to AmyE (and I suppose the rest of us less fortunate ladies) with no actual knowledge of the person you are saying it to. How would you know this anyway? Any evidence to back this up? Yes, I'm jealous of your ability. But there's no need to make the rest of us feel hopeless.

__________________
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

Aladdin Sane

I've just read about the G-shot. Anyone else know anything more about it?

From the Mail Online:

And so a fortnight ago, Caroline became the first British woman to have


The 'G-shot', also known as the 'orgasm jab' - an £800 non-surgical treatment that enhances a woman's sexual experience by boosting the G-spot, the ultra-sensitive area of tissue that can hold the key to happy love-making.

Rather like lip-plumping jabs, the treatment involves injecting collagen straight into the G-spot.

This not only enhances its sensitivity, but increases the width of the area to the size of a 10 pence piece.

It also raises the G-spot a quarter of an inch in height, making it much easier to find. And, as Caroline can testify, the results are tremendous. 'I have quite literally never experienced anything quite like it,' she says. 'I had constant multiple orgasms which went on for hours.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...fe-better.html
and
http://www.thegshot.com/default.htm

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Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.

Milkyway

To be able to truly address some of the concerns here I need some clarification. When you are saying cum,come,came are you referring to:
A. Organsim, screaming, rush of emotion, can't hold back, climax, then relaxation
B. Slippery slidey super wet woman
C. Or literally cumming just as a man, explosion of fluid from EXTREME sexual pleasure

I have experienced all three and they are all completely different. BTW answer C didn't happened until after I had my second child, I don't know what happened in there but I am not complaining-and no it is not that I pee-believe me we have watched this miraculous event very closely. And would have had children 10 years ago if I knew this would happen!!!!!

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Yes you can get off on the same sexual experience for 24 full hours!!!!!

Aladdin Sane

I'm referring to A: Orgasm.

__________________
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.

Milkyway

I typically need more than just intercourse. If I am hot already on my own, saw something on TV, read something, typed something, whatever and am hot about it, then I literallky just need hard object in cunt-typically that means I just give my hubby little rub in his sleep til he's hard climb on do my thing, climb off and go to bed, no kissing, no other touching, no talking.

But typically I need that other involvement to reach an orgasm. Just having a hard cock in me, does not make me hot and does not make me get off. If I get a little foreplay, watch out I am unstoppable!!!

Hope that helps.

Physically woman do not have orgasms unless they are sexually stimulated, and if the only stimulation is hard cock in vagina orgasm is unlikely-hence why rape victims typically don't get off.

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Yes you can get off on the same sexual experience for 24 full hours!!!!!

Pholeus

My current girlfriend has only gotten off once from sex, and she had to rub her clit while getting penetrated in order for that to happen. This has been an adjustment for me, as the few other women I had been with have gotten off everytime. I guess my ego got used to that, so now I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough and she's not enjoying it enough. Eventually I expect to get used to it.