anti depressants - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Contrary · 05-29-2004, 12:35 PM

Me and my SO split up about a year ago and it was really hard for me to handle, but eventually after a few monthes we got back together. Ever since that emotional blow from breaking up with her, i've been really hateful towards everyone for no good reason, and had this feeling of hopelessness all day every day, i just assumed i had depression but just waited for it to go away because i was to afraid to talk to anyone about it. After we got back together, the bad feelings didn't go away, and after a year of dealing with that (argueing with her a lot, shes bullheaded and this depression made me bullheaded too, so we clashed), we started hitting rough water. I had the feeling that she wasnt enjoying us anymore, and finally decided to get some help. I went to the doc and sure enough i have depression, and he started me out on Zoloft. 3 days after i started taking the medicine, we broke up for good, so thats making me feel pretty bummed, but this medicine is making me feel, kind of fake i guess the word might be. I know im supposed to be down and sad about breaking up with my SO after 2 years, but when i take this medicine, it makes me feel almost like i dont even care. I know i should be feeling horrible and sad and crap, but, i have this fake feeling inside of me. It seems wrong to not be bummed out about this, even someone not depressed would be, it gives me this attitude that i shouldnt even try to save our relationship anymore, where as in the past i would have gotten all bent out of shape and did whatever i could to save the relationship. i know deep down that i still long to be with her and that i love her very much, but its like this medicine is blocking my feelings. Anyone else been through anything like this before? its kind of like, the angel and the devil on either side of my head, what i really feel and what this medicine is making me feel.

WarWagon · 05-29-2004, 06:06 PM

I know exactly how you feel. I've been on everything from Welbutrin to Paxil to Trazodone, and yes, it does hinder your ability to feel emotion in some cases. I've never been one to really express emotion to others, but past antidepressants have kept me from feeling it altogether, and I was actually thankful for that in a way.

Unfortunately, a lot of people settle for the "I don't give a shit attitude," because they feel that its better than sitting around being miserable. You do have three options though.

One, stay on the Zoloft and try to work around these feelings, or lack thereof. If its preventing your typical emotion but making you miserable because of that, its not doing its job as an antidepressant.

Two, talk to your doctor and try another prescription. I can't emphasize how important this is. Everyone is different, and you really need to do some exploring and find the right combination that works for you. I haven't found the right combination yet, but I have learned which ones to stay away from (search for my post on Paxil Withdrawal).

The third possibility, stop taking them altogether. A lot of people get to a point where they feel that they don't want to have to rely on pills to make it through the day, and thats fine, but be prepared for a bit of a system shock, both physically and psychologically.

However, if you don't necessarily have these feelings for her, don't try to convince yourself that you do. I was in a very similar situation, and broke up with my ex after 2 years 3 months. I was 100% sure that she was the one I wanted to be with, and was miserable for months after. I realized soon thereafter, that it wasn't her that I really wanted to be with, as much as it was just somebody that I wanted to be with. I completely phased her out of my life cold turkey (this is the ONLY way to do it, trust me), and was lucky enough to meet the most wonderful person in the world a few months later.

Disposition · 05-29-2004, 06:42 PM

I was thinking about getting on wellbutrin for my depression. I just have a hard time seeing how a pill will help me deal with the problems i have on the inside.

WarWagon · 05-29-2004, 06:49 PM

These pills won't make these problems go away, but they can reduce the "its the end of the world" notions that you have about them. For many, its a way to say "fuck it" and do the things they're supposed to do. Take myself for example. Zero motivation to do anything whatsoever. In a 12 week period, I think I went to my morning lectures twice, the first day to get the syllabus, and the last day to review for the final. These pills when taken properly, can at least give you the motivation to get up in the morning, and can prevent you from sitting and dwelling on these problems all day.

However, this mellowness definitely can result in some nasty consequences and bad habits. If anyone would like to discuss these further, feel free to PM me.

Disposition · 05-29-2004, 07:49 PM

what happens when you no longer need the pills...do you just suddenly realize "hey life isn't so bad i don't need this as a help anymore?"

WarWagon · 05-29-2004, 08:01 PM

There are a number of reactions people can have. That which you mentioned is one possibility. Some people have physical reactions and withdrawal symptoms due to seretonin changes, but this is more common with some drugs than others. Many people will gradually wean themselves off of it to the point where they no longer need it. This way, if you start seeing that things aren't going as planned when coming off of it, you can pick up where you left off without hitting any nasty lows in between.

05-29-2004, 12:35 PM	#1 (permalink)
Contrary Upright	anti depressants Me and my SO split up about a year ago and it was really hard for me to handle, but eventually after a few monthes we got back together. Ever since that emotional blow from breaking up with her, i've been really hateful towards everyone for no good reason, and had this feeling of hopelessness all day every day, i just assumed i had depression but just waited for it to go away because i was to afraid to talk to anyone about it. After we got back together, the bad feelings didn't go away, and after a year of dealing with that (argueing with her a lot, shes bullheaded and this depression made me bullheaded too, so we clashed), we started hitting rough water. I had the feeling that she wasnt enjoying us anymore, and finally decided to get some help. I went to the doc and sure enough i have depression, and he started me out on Zoloft. 3 days after i started taking the medicine, we broke up for good, so thats making me feel pretty bummed, but this medicine is making me feel, kind of fake i guess the word might be. I know im supposed to be down and sad about breaking up with my SO after 2 years, but when i take this medicine, it makes me feel almost like i dont even care. I know i should be feeling horrible and sad and crap, but, i have this fake feeling inside of me. It seems wrong to not be bummed out about this, even someone not depressed would be, it gives me this attitude that i shouldnt even try to save our relationship anymore, where as in the past i would have gotten all bent out of shape and did whatever i could to save the relationship. i know deep down that i still long to be with her and that i love her very much, but its like this medicine is blocking my feelings. Anyone else been through anything like this before? its kind of like, the angel and the devil on either side of my head, what i really feel and what this medicine is making me feel.

05-29-2004, 06:06 PM	#2 (permalink)
WarWagon Loser	I know exactly how you feel. I've been on everything from Welbutrin to Paxil to Trazodone, and yes, it does hinder your ability to feel emotion in some cases. I've never been one to really express emotion to others, but past antidepressants have kept me from feeling it altogether, and I was actually thankful for that in a way. Unfortunately, a lot of people settle for the "I don't give a shit attitude," because they feel that its better than sitting around being miserable. You do have three options though. One, stay on the Zoloft and try to work around these feelings, or lack thereof. If its preventing your typical emotion but making you miserable because of that, its not doing its job as an antidepressant. Two, talk to your doctor and try another prescription. I can't emphasize how important this is. Everyone is different, and you really need to do some exploring and find the right combination that works for you. I haven't found the right combination yet, but I have learned which ones to stay away from (search for my post on Paxil Withdrawal). The third possibility, stop taking them altogether. A lot of people get to a point where they feel that they don't want to have to rely on pills to make it through the day, and thats fine, but be prepared for a bit of a system shock, both physically and psychologically. However, if you don't necessarily have these feelings for her, don't try to convince yourself that you do. I was in a very similar situation, and broke up with my ex after 2 years 3 months. I was 100% sure that she was the one I wanted to be with, and was miserable for months after. I realized soon thereafter, that it wasn't her that I really wanted to be with, as much as it was just somebody that I wanted to be with. I completely phased her out of my life cold turkey (this is the ONLY way to do it, trust me), and was lucky enough to meet the most wonderful person in the world a few months later.

05-29-2004, 06:42 PM	#3 (permalink)
Disposition Upright Location: Ohio	I was thinking about getting on wellbutrin for my depression. I just have a hard time seeing how a pill will help me deal with the problems i have on the inside.

05-29-2004, 06:49 PM	#4 (permalink)
WarWagon Loser	These pills won't make these problems go away, but they can reduce the "its the end of the world" notions that you have about them. For many, its a way to say "fuck it" and do the things they're supposed to do. Take myself for example. Zero motivation to do anything whatsoever. In a 12 week period, I think I went to my morning lectures twice, the first day to get the syllabus, and the last day to review for the final. These pills when taken properly, can at least give you the motivation to get up in the morning, and can prevent you from sitting and dwelling on these problems all day. However, this mellowness definitely can result in some nasty consequences and bad habits. If anyone would like to discuss these further, feel free to PM me.

05-29-2004, 07:49 PM	#5 (permalink)
Disposition Upright Location: Ohio	what happens when you no longer need the pills...do you just suddenly realize "hey life isn't so bad i don't need this as a help anymore?"

05-29-2004, 08:01 PM	#6 (permalink)
WarWagon Loser	There are a number of reactions people can have. That which you mentioned is one possibility. Some people have physical reactions and withdrawal symptoms due to seretonin changes, but this is more common with some drugs than others. Many people will gradually wean themselves off of it to the point where they no longer need it. This way, if you start seeing that things aren't going as planned when coming off of it, you can pick up where you left off without hitting any nasty lows in between.