Kurant

Just want to get this off my chest, it may be long winded.

Couple of weeks ago a girl that my and a few of my buddies know, that goes to lunch with us, and hangs out with us, almos tlike one of the guys, she broke up with her boyfriend. 2-3 days later, I ask her if she's going to try and make it work, and she said no, she was already intrested in someone else. Now, she's very easy to read, her emoitions, body language, things like that, it was no suprise to me she had it for my best friend.

She asked me what I thought about it, I just told her maybe she needs to be alone for a while, and realize some of her responsibilities. She has 3 kids, from 2 different fathers. Been married once. She goes out on the weekends, her ex-boyfriend lives with her, and watches his and her kid, and her other 2 kids. She was over at my best friends house till 7am with 3 kids at home, and her ex-boyfriend..

Every night that we do somthing, she's there. Her ex-boyfriend is at home watching her kids. We went bowling saturday, same thing. I invited a few buddies over to watch the fight on Saturday night just this last weekend, and she just shows up at my house. My best friend and her got all cuddly and touchy feely on the couch. My wife said she didn't appreciate it, and she thought it was wrong she has 3 kids at home, and that she's acting like that, with her ex-boyfriend watching her kids.

I asked him if he wanted to go lift on monday at the gym, we went. She showed up, we never lifted. They went swimming, I did my own thing.

I guess I just feel alienated by the whole thing, and now I'm on the outside looking in. It's odd, and all of us being such good friends, it's wierded me out a little.

I'm more just worried about what happens if somthing goes wrong, and the other 2 or 3 of us are put in the middle. Almost like being asked to choose sides. I just think she needs to grow up ,and realize her reponsibilites, instead of relying on her ex-boyfriend to do these things for her, while shes out trying to get it on with another guy. I do have a problem with that.

Maybe I'm just over analyzing things, or almost a little jelousy, but I'm happy for them, as long as they are. I just don't think she's even made one rational thought about the downside of the whole thing.

I don't know what to think? Or to say. I almost feel liek I should just seperate myself, so when it does come crashing down, I'm not in the middle.

MSD

You say you're all such good friends, yet you write as if you resent the fact that she hangs out with you. You're either sugarcoating it for us, or you're fooling yourself.

Keep your distance and warn your friend about your concerns. He'll get angry and curse you out for it, but if he's a good friend, he'll come up to you when it's over and admit that you were right.

moonstrucksoul

sounds like she just wants to slut it up, so hope your buddy deosn't invest more than 5-9 inches in her. just an opinion.

__________________
no signature required

Lebell

I think your wife is right and this person sounds like trouble.

__________________
"Of all tyrannies, a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience." – C. S. Lewis

The ONLY sponsors we have are YOU!

Please Donate!

raeanna74

Hubby and I knew a girl who sounded just like that. In the end she lost her kids to social services, I got a collect call from her from the police station, etc. Even ended up with her at my door at 2:00 am with her then boyfriend in hot pursuit. He got her in a choke hold and between her and my open door. She got away and ran into a neighbor's open door. She ws trouble from the beginning but the end was very sad for her and all those who had helped her.

I would speak to your friend. Maybe even speak to her ex, asking him what his reasoning is for watching her kids. My guess is that he's got no clue what she's up to. If he quits watching the kids for her she has to stay home and cool it. Also I might suggest to your friend that when he comes over to your place he is welcome but he should not engage in any kissy face with her on your couch as you feel that he's getting himself into a dangerous situation and you feel guilty about allowing it in your home. Basically telling him he can do what he wants with his own life, just not on your turf. If he's a real friend he'll respect that. If she's a real friend she'll respect that.

Honestly she really needs to stop taking advantage of her ex. Think about it. If she's treating him this way then how's she going to treat you and your friend? She's a user. Watch your step carefully.

OH and make sure your friend is reminded to use condoms. He may end up being a child support providee if he doesn't. That's how our friend supported herself. She had 4 kids and recieved 3 support checks. Pathetic.

__________________
"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

Peetster

Her priorities are screwed up. She should be there for her kids. She's not. Sounds to me like she's looking for a new meal ticket.