Zeraph

On felony charges. No bail. For the worst kind of crime....child molestation. I've known him a long time. He's one of the nicest people around. What am I supposed to think?

I don't think he did it but FUCK!

edit: the story is that (he's a doc) and takes care of a special needs child. The kid likes it at his house more than his parents. So the parents (apparently) got jealous and made up (hopefully) fake charges.

FUCK!

RogueGypsy

That's messed up. If he's innocent, I hope they fry the parents. Accusations like this are unacceptable.

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Grancey

Kids don't usually make up stuff like that. When accusations are made, kids go through expert questioning and interviewing. Just saying....

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Xerxys

WTF?? Kids are story tellers. My niece cries EVERYTIME I ask her to get her shoes on. One time she heard my mom tell me not to yell at her (to her benefit, I was yelling, I freaked out because she climbed on the table and started jumping up and down) and that has been her go to story whenever I ask her to do something she doesn't want to do. I've had to move her up to severe punishments including standing in the corner facing the wall up to 5 whole minutes for lying. It's torture . Even when she lies remotely about something small I make sure she's punished for it.

Wait, what was my point? Oh right. Kids can be story tellers but they won't be able to fool a professional. When this kid is questioned by a child shrink then your friend will get justice. Weather or not it's in his favor, I don't know.

bagatelle

Oh, kids do tell stories.

Not so long ago there was a piece of news warning about a woman driving a red car and stalking kids!

The woman in question recognized herself in the story and contacted the police. She had seen a kid about 8-10 pulling off snow sticks beside the road - the sticks that will guide the snow plow drivers.

She had followed the kid to his home yard, stopped the car and given him a lecture. The boy then made up a story at home, father called the police and the press. School warned other kids of a possible stalker. Two more reports from concerned parents followed, their kids telling of a woman seen in a red car with silent man sitting at the back trying to lure kids in their car... There was no man at all.

monkeysugar

Hopefully he is legit and the trial finds out accordingly. Hopefully.

If not, and he's found guilty...well...he's pretty much fucked. I'd tell him to request protective custody, or get very familiar with the phrase: "I refuse my housing assignment." Beats the hell out of, at the very least, getting the ass-whupping of the century as soon as someone sees his paperwork, which WILL be demanded as soon as he gets to his...ahem...new living arrangements. This is of course, in the worst possible situation, and is not the result of some major misunderstanding.

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snowy

As an aside, Xerx...you really really need to stop this. You're probably actually making things worse. There's a difference between disciplining a child appropriately and punishing them. Punishment is bad; over time, it will make your niece fear you, and it may even make her more of a liar in order to avoid the punishment she knows is coming. You need to ensure a child UNDERSTANDS why they are in trouble--you sit down and talk with them. "Hey, so you did A, why did you do A? Why don't we do A? What are the consequences of doing A?" Yes, you give time outs, but you make clear that a time out is meant as a period in which they can think about their choices, their actions, and the consequences. A time out should also be no longer than their age; beyond that and it really isn't doing you any good. It's just fostering resentment and not encouraging them to think about the problem.

As to the OP: I'm sorry, that's really tough, but your friend should have ensured he was allegation-proof in this situation. As someone who works with children professionally too, I can tell you that I make damn sure my ass is covered. If I have to be alone with a child to toilet them, I make sure the door is open and that another teacher knows I am taking that child to toilet them. There's no doubt that people are really allegation-happy these days, and it saddens me that I have to take precautions to protect myself, but your friend really should have realized the same things.

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Wes Mantooth

I don't understand, why was your friend taking the child to his house in the first place? I don't have the first clue about the legalities behind taking care of a special needs child or what the arrangement was with the parents but unless he was providing 24/7 care and/or given some kind of permission it doesn't seem like there should be any reason to bring the child to his house. It would be an open invitation for these kind of allegations to get tossed around I would think.

Anyway not saying he's guilty or anything but in cases like this isn't it common for care to be given at the parents house or some at some kind of 3rd party location?

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Xerxys

After the last two time outs, she doesn't lie to me. She still does to her mom and my mom too, but not me. She understands I take it seriously and it's the only thing I impress upon her. I expect kids to break things and hurt themselves. That's normal, so I only punish her for things she understands is wrong and probably shouldn't repeat and that includes lying.

bagatelle

I know you expect thread starter to reply, but here's my thoughts:

My aunt has worked with special needs children and adults. Since her own children are already grown up, she sometimes has taken a teenage boy to her home to spend the weekend. I assume this is to give the parents a free weekend, I don't know about the family, but taking care of special needs children can be quite burdensome to parents and the best solution for them might be around someone familiar.