blktour

So I have this roommate. He happens to be one of my very close friends. I bought a condo, and it is solely in my name, I have him living with me, and the agreement was to split rent/water/electric/gas bills 50% down the middle.

He is living with me and the whole house is rented, not just the room.

So all is good, we split food and everything. I never wrote up a lease which I know I should have, but I am not very good at this. this is the first time I have done this.

Well now he just got offered a job on the slope here in alaska and will be gone 6 weeks at a time. 6 weeks on and 6 weeks off.

he just stated to me, "well I will only pay rent, no gas, no electric, no water, since i am paying for the "storage of my goods." to this I said nothing. I didnt really know how to answer to that.

Now I am not a greedy person, since I can afford the whole place on my own, but I dont want to come off as a dick.

I think it is unfair for him to "state" this, as if there is no discussion about it.

do i seem wrong to even think of asking for him to pay his portion while he is gone? I know he wont be using it and such, but where ever he goes he will have to pay for this stuff even if he was in town or not.

I just feel he is taking advantage of me since we are friends. but if he shouldnt pay this i just want some help understanding why he SHOULDNT?

I also think that if he does have to pay and I ask him, he will leave. which is fine but he is somewhat helping me out and for that i appreciate him, but I can always find a new roommate.

what are your thoughts?

snowy

My roommate works at a job that takes him out of town every summer. He pays his share of the rent while he's gone but does not pay utilities, as he's not there. In the past, when we had to get utilities hooked up while he was gone (we moved in while he was off working), he has paid his share of the hookup fee. Same with getting the cable hooked up this summer (we moved into a new house); he wasn't there but paid his part for the hookup fee.

Similarly, you shouldn't expect your roommate to pay for utilities if he's not there using them. He should pay for the six weeks he is there. This is going to require you doing some math to prorate the utilities for when he is there. It's not hard to do. Then issue him a bill for the utilities. Make sure to put it all in writing.

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telekinetic

Makes sense to me, if he stated it undelicately. He won't be using any utilities while he is gone. However, aren't utilities billed monthly? I'd say basically only let him skip months where he totally wasn't there.

genuinegirly

He won't be using utilities while he is away. This is not an unusual request. The way he asked it doesn't seem the most tactful method, but he probably did not intend for it to come off in a demanding manner.

If you would like a roomate who will be present to use more utilities and in turn pay for those utilites, you should find someone new.

You could always tell him, "Hey, of course I don't intend for you to pay the bill when you're not here. Just do me a favor and don't demand it next time. It kinda weirded me out."

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Glory's Sun

just because you don't use something doesn't mean you don't have to pay for it. If the agreement was to split everything then that's the agreement...

now of course, you can amend this agreement to reflect that he won't pay for utilities and such while he's gone but you better make sure you're good with a calculator..

kurty[B]

Sounds like a negotiation to me.

What's your Best Other Alternative? If you ask him to continue paying utilities while he is away and he takes offense to that and simply moves his things out. Then you are out his half of the rent. Like you said, you can afford to pay for the house on your own, he is just helping you out. So, is his half of the rent worth it to you?

Even though his name is not on the mortgage will he see any of the profits when/if the house is sold? Or is he strictly paying rent to you as any other tennant would?

If I were you, I'd be happy to be collecting full rent to "store" his belongings. I would do what I could to save on utilities (turn down the heat, keep lights off, insulate insulate insulate) while he is away.

onesnowyowl's arrangement makes perfect sense to me.

I'm also for written out, and signed lease agreements (whether your roommate is your best-friend or not). To protect you and the renter.

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In the Absence of Information People Make Things Up.

Glory's Sun

amen to the written and signed agreements.

and another note, in my experiences, friends make the worst roommates.

surferlove007

I sublet my room last summer, the person living there paid my utilities. Whenever we're out of town for a month, breaks etc. we never pay for the utilities if we're not there. I don't think it's unusual for him to state he won't be paying for them as he won't be there to bring the bills up. With just you, they should be lower.

dlish

if you let your apartment and you didnt live there, and those people that are renting your apartment said that they were going going on a holiday and didnt want to pay utilities, you would tell them to fuck right off.

i see no difference here

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Cynthetiq

that's my point of view as well.

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ASU2003

There are connection fees and such that are the same each month that could be split if it is that important to you, but my feeling is that if is stuff isn't using any power or need any heat, than he shouldn't have to pay to have you use it. Cable and phone are a bit tricky, internet is split for the month he is there for two weeks, but nothing for the full month.

I was living in Phoenix, but went home during the summer. If my roommate had stayed in the apartment and had $200 electric bills from using he AC when they were normally $30, I would have a problem with it. (We always had 9 month leases and put our stuff in storage to get around that problem)

Come up with a yearly calendar an write down what you think would be fair amounts to pay each month and talk to him about it.

blktour

That is what I am saying. I know he will pay something somewhere, where ever he goes.

this was my thought process.

if he rented a place, he cant just pay rent and no heat or gas in an apartment of his own right?

in all fairness. yes he wont use it, but in a place of his own he wont either, but will be required to pay. so because it is me, he is taking advantage?
-----Added 31/10/2008 at 08 : 10 : 50-----
So I live ALONE, and i work on the slope so I am gone 6 wks at a time, then that means I can call my electric/gas/water companies and work out prorates with them right?

this is the reasoning I am thinking.

where ever you go. bills still have to be paid. because it is me who he is dealing with and not with the companies, it makes it ok?

Cynthetiq

right... in NYC i can call the cable company and tell them to turn off my cable for a period of time, this is so that those that go down to FL for the winter don't pay full price for their cable. They pay a lesser amount, but it's less than the disconnect and reconnect hassles.

I believe the same goes for gas and electric. I'm not 100% sure, but that may be the case.

The idea is that it is not 100% free and clear no payments, but a reduced amount because the usage is none, and the hassle for reconnection is a pain.

Now my parents don't go to their property in Vegas any longer, it's basically mothballed, but they still have to water the lawn, and electricity is still on in case they decide to go back there.

I guess it depends on the person that you are, and what kinds of hassles you are interested in having in your household when you have your own space and how you manage your own space.

IMO if I was in your shoes, I'd feel taken advantage of, at least pay a little since the stuff is still there. It's "using" the space and taking advantage of the climate control.

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kurty[B]

You certainly have the right to ask him to chip in for those things even while he is away. He also has the right to say "alright then, I'm going to move my things out".

Make sure during any negotiations to explain that it is only business. I've seen plenty of friendships ruined because of difference while rooming together. Try and treat it as strictly business and find an agreement that works for both of you (try not to get hung up on positions and take it or leave it talk).

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In the Absence of Information People Make Things Up.

blktour

this is only electric, and gas and water.

as far as cable and internet and phone. i work for the telco company so i get all that for free. he uses all of that and I dont charge him a dime for that.

He uses both MORE and I mean WAY more of the internet and cable and I dont charge him any more or any less, since that was the agreement. reguardless of the price, the deal was a deal.

I like to hold up to my word and do what I say i am going to do.

just an FYI.

little_tippler

I think he was rude to just assume that. It's your house.

And I agree with dlish. If he's renting, he's renting. You can be nice and allow the I'm not paying utilities stance, but I would make it clear that it's a favour because you're friends. You need to make it clear where you stand. If he gets pissy about it, he's just doing it because he knows you're right. No-one likes being told they're wrong.

I would never have a friend as a roommate. All sorts of falling out potential. Not worth it.

Never mix business and friends. It rarely works.

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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

blktour

Well I talked to him and just made the decision of letting him opt out when he is gone to not pay.

it makes it easier that way for the both of us i guess. Like I said I am not greedy.

but now I just got word that a girl that likes him, he told her that he will pack up his stuff and move out to save money.

So what is a respectable time frame for him to give me notice? 30days?

I just have this feeling that he will move out now. if that is the case that is fine, I just hope he does so in a respectful manner.

dlish

should you not be re-evaluating your frienship if this is the sort of person he is???

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

blktour

I am actually pondering this. Trust me. I am. I am actually sad about the whole ordeal.

I should've listened when they said living with friends turns out shaky.

kurty[B]

I wish it wasn't, but in my experience it always has been.

As far as a respectable time of notice on moving out; 30 days notice is a respectable norm.

If you get a future roommate get a written lease done. Do some research on lease agreements and even consult a lawyer if you can.

__________________
In the Absence of Information People Make Things Up.

Poppinjay

If I had a friend contributing 50% to my mortgage and claiming no equity, I'd let him have at least water for free. This isn't an investment property, you live there. He's not getting his own place, he's sharing with you.

If I had somebody who was going to continue to pay 50% rent while gone, I'd be a very happy person.

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blktour

When you pay rent with an apartment complex, you don't get nothing from that.

why is this any different?

you think the apartment complex cares about this? I am considered this apt complex in this situation.

Cynthetiq

the friend also didn't contribute to the downpayment nor the risk involved in taking on the mortgage.

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

blktour

thank you.

I am not complaining nor am I wanting more.

I have talked to him about this, and we cleared things up. I decided to be the nice guy and let him pay when he is here.

go to an apt complex and try to do that. that wont fly.

the other thing that came up was that i got word that he might be packing up his stuff and leaving.

With that, i will cross that bridge when I get there.

I do appreciate the help he has given me. Finding renters here in Alaska is not hard though, because a hole in the wall basic apartment is about $850/mo plus utilities.

So $580/mo is nothing.